What would you have done?

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

Last edited Tue Apr 29, 2014, 12:48 PM - Edit history (1)

My husband and I were in a restaurant celebrating our wedding anniversary last May. Just after we had ordered dessert, the guy at the next booth began blabbering on very loudly, espousing your typical RW talking points about the minimum wage. Apparently he owns a few fast food franchises and was getting worried about all the activism around raising the minimum wage.

My husband and I are both to the left of most of the citizenry on most issues. But my husband is far less likely to say so to anyone he knows doesn't agree. (Although he did tell his brother-in-law he was "all wet" and said, "I don't agree with anything you said." after sitting through his, "It's Obama, man!" rant in the car on the way home from picking up another of the brothers at the train station. Neither of them said anything to the RW BiL, but did give my husband the thumbs up once they got out of the car at the home of the RW SiL and BiL they were visiting.)

I have a history of saying things to people who are bugging me in public, usually idiots who won't shut up in the movie theater, and it always mortifies my husband. So, as it was our anniversary and I didn't want to embarrass my husband, I decided I would not let the RW blabbermouth incite me to any behavior that would make my husband uncomfortable.

Also, I was trying to hang on to the blissed-out feeling I had from our lovely little anniversary trip to the shore, that was ending the next day. So hubby and i just sort of rolled our eyes at one-another, jointly acknowledging the RW big mouth's RW obnoxiousness, and ate our dessert and left far more quickly than we'd have otherwise done.

In a couple of weeks we will return to the same Cape May hotel and will probably eat in that same restaurant, but the memory of the RW next-booth-neighbor and my failure to respond in a way that I'm at peace with will put a bit of a negative cast on that possibility.

I have occasionally over the past year thought of the incident and wondered if there was anything I could have done that would not have been just as bad as the moron loudly declaring his RW nasty views at the next table. What would you have done? Or later wished you'd done?

[el_bryanto]

1. Was it racist? Or was it belittling to working class people?

I don't know - while people being noisy in a restaurant is annoying, I usually tune out what they are saying so it doesn't really come up. One time I was stuck at my mechanics I got into it with someone talking about the Trayvon Martin case, but that's the exception not the norm.

Bryant

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

4. Well, yeah, it was belittling to working class people. That's the main jist of RW talking points

about minimum wage, or one of the main points. "These lazy bums flipping burgers think they deserve over ten bucks an hour!?" was what mister big at the next booth was mostly yammering on about.

[H2O Man]

2. Interesting question.

I tend to view individuals such as the gentleman that you described here, as having all the charm of a steaming pile of dog feces on a sidewalk. Their opinions are of utterly no significance. Thus, when traveling on the sidewalks of life, I prefer to step around them.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

3. But what it the steaming pile is sat in the booth next to you?

[H2O Man]

48. I hear ya!

You are going out for a good reason (and spending money ), and it sure ain't to listen to some obnoxious jerk. It's beyond annoying. I've had that experience, a few times, and it really can ruin part of what should be a fun time. That's frustrating. In fact, so much so, that my dog feces comment is the best recommendation I can think of.

Somewhat related, though not close to the same scale: a couple of weeks ago, I went to get an Rx filled. It usually takes 20-30 minutes, and so I bring a book to read while I wait.

A couple came into the "waiting area" a few minutes after me, and -- despite there being plenty of seats available -- filled the two chairs nearest me. They were loud, obnoxious, ignorant, and plain old stupid. Despite my attempts to block their existence, I heard them babbling about President Obama being the anti-christ, etc, etc,etc.

At one point, the charming gal said, "It's all there in the bible -- in the book of revelations -- it predicts these planes disappearing, and cruise ships sinking! It's all right there!"

I burst out laughing. Simply couldn't help it. Luckily, my Rx was filled a few minutes later.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

62. I don't usually find the humor in these situations. Thank goodness I have Jon Stewart and

Stephen Colbert to help me with that!

[mercuryblues]

96. Fake a loud laugh

Say something like life must be tuff when you keep stepping into a steaming pile of dog poo and being told dog poo is good for your shoes. Then fake a hearty laugh.

What you are doing is letting an asshole ruin your experience. Stop. The asshole deserves being mocked, ridiculed and scorned, but not given power to ruin your night.

[question everything]

78. Ask to be moved to another booth. (nt)

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

88. Yes, if it had happened earlier we might have thought of that. We hadn't really heard anything said

at that table until the guy started spouting the RW crap. Then, it took much longer than we'd expected for the server to bring our dessert order, so we didn't expect to be there for as long as we were once the dude got so annoying.

[hfojvt]

56. that seems a bit harsh

I never really met a man, or a woman, that I thought was a steaming pile of dog doodoo, or had the charm thereof.

And I'm more of the desire to clean up a mess rather than just step around it.

[H2O Man]

58. wonderful

[hfojvt]

59. you are in a harsh mood?

You should come over. I have a heavy bag downstairs.

[immoderate]

5. You can feel secure in the fact that nothing you might have said...

...would have bestowed enlightenment onto the RWer. You may have passed up a chance at instant gratification, but I don't think you would feel any better now.

--imm

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

8. That is almost certainly true. I just wish I'd figured out a way to have him STFU so we could

eat our dessert in peace.

[immoderate]

16. That might have been accomplished, but not by challenging his content.

"Could you not talk so loud?" might have worked. You never know.

--imm

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

17. True. I thought of asking the waiter who delivered the desserts if he could ask the

guy to keep his voice down. But, again, I had assigned myself the challenge of not letting it bother me. Clearly a challenge I did not meet.

[immoderate]

22. You have lived to fight another day.

--imm

[JEB]

77. And the loud mouth can stew

in his own stupidity.

[Squinch]

95. I would have called the waiter or waitress over and, as loudly as that guy was talking, told

the server that I hoped the law of the land soon gave them a large and long overdue raise.

(You can pretty much guarantee that wait staff is getting less than minimum wage.)

[Springslips]

55. On the other hand.

A good old fashion screaming match may do enough psychic damage that he'd learn to keep his voice down in public. I like the "just pass by advice" but, many of these RW nuts see that as weakness. It is why they are so obnoxious and loud in public; they think it is strength. When they meet a progressive not afraid to get into the thick with them, they leave frustrated and confused, and they become quieter in public.

[immoderate]

57. That's kind of a "best case" scenario, but...

I do accept your point.


--imm

[laundry_queen]

93. IME that is exactly right. nt

[quinnox]

6. Nothing, none of my business

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

11. Interesting perspective. Others talking inappropriately in public bothers me no matter what they're

saying, but especially when it's inflammatory RW BS. I wish I had your ability to tune it out.

[hobbit709]

7. At times I have been known to loudly wonder

if some people are naturally born stupid or did they have to take lessons.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

9. I think RW talk radio and tv are giving out those lessons for free.

[RandoLoodie]

10. MMOFB

I ain't no spring chicken and I can't cash checks with my ass that my mouth is capable of writing.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

12. I wish I had any idea what you meant!

[RandoLoodie]

13. Or just ask to be seated at another table

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

19. Probably should have. If it had been earlier in the meal, I think we'd have thought of that option.

[Capt. Obvious]

14. When did the cameras come out?

[MO_Moderate]

15. I would mind my own business

I respect the right of others to hold different opinions than my own.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

18. I'm all for his right to hold them. Just not for his right to shout them in an otherwise quiet

restaurant.

[MO_Moderate]

20. Really?

Would you have wanted to speak up if he was spouting the supposed benefits of raising the minimum wage?

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

33. It's not that I wanted to speak up. I just wanted him to shut up. Or, at least more quietly.

And, of course I would have been less annoyed by someone espousing smart ideas instead of stupid ones, but if they were obnoxiously loud, it would have still been annoying.

[GeorgeGist]

43. 'supposed benefits'

I think you spouted too much.

[MO_Moderate]

45. We were discussing opinion

Supposed benefits and supposed downfalls of raising the minimum wage are the two differing opinion.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

61. Yeah, benefits for those who need it, downfalls for he greedy. Not much

of a serious discussion.

[MO_Moderate]

98. Your opinion

still shouldn't lead to anger though.

[ProfessorGAC]

50. Sort Of My POV, Except. . .

. . .i would include i can respect the right of others to hold their opinion, but i don't have to respect the opinion.

[MO_Moderate]

52. Which is how it should be

Way too much anger and hate for differing opinions out there.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

64. Yeah, we should just accept all views. I mean, Hitler has some good points, I'm sure, if only

we took the time to listen.

[MO_Moderate]

99. Ah, bringing up a silly extreme - the last grasp

Sadly, the actions you desired to undertake are much closer to your extreme example than that mans opinion.

[Orrex]

21. Most people would probably mind their own business.

If this asshole were chattering through a movie, then you'd be reasonably well-justified in confronting him about it (unless you're in Florida, where people get shot for that sort of thing).

I have a history of saying things to people who are bugging me in public.

Well, that's kind of on you. Unless he was engaged in some sort of really unacceptable speech (overt sexism, explicit profanity, grotesque racism, etc.), then who are you to confront him about it? If you can't deal with the fact that people in public places might say things that you find objectionable, then perhaps you should stick to more private venues.

From your description of the event, it doesn't sound like he was saying anything inappropriate. How would you have benefited by confronting him? Would he change his views? Almost certainly not. Would you feel better? Maybe, but that's mostly just posturing.

I can tell you this much: even if you'd confronted him, he most likely wouldn't be complaining about the incident 11 months after the fact.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

25. Did I suggest it's not "on me" that I speak up when I think people are being obnoxious in public?

And the point is not that I expected to change his views, which has already been covered in the replies above. But he was blaring his RW BS opinions in at an inappropriate volume in an otherwise quiet restaurant, and i have every right to object to that.

And you have no fking idea whether or not that RW jerkoff would have been complaining about it later. NO FKING IDEA. Clearly you're just attacking me with that BS speculation.

[Orrex]

31. Before you go back to the restaurant, you should deal with your anger issues.

If you get this pointlessly fired up because of a post on an anonymous internet forum, I can't imagine how you make it through dinner where real-live people might actually speak within earshot.

Your immediate choice to use the term "attack" is entirely consistent with your zeal elsewhere to use the term "victim." You're engaging in a transparent rhetorical tactic, hoping to generate sympathy by painting yourself as the target of an assault where none has actually occurred. It's an effective trick, I grant you, because there will always be sycophants willing to support such narcissism, but it looks ridiculous and obvious to everyone else.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

36. Lol! It's cute how you and your straw man friend are inseparable.

[Orrex]

37. Even cuter that you still don't know what a straw man is.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

63. Yeah, I do. Go back to the "idealized images" discussion. You were flaunting

a giant one there and when confronted with it just reintroduced it like it was something new. It was silly of me to have bothered with you. But don't worry, it won't happen again.

[Orrex]

72. I know that you like to pretend that you're the victim and that you're being attacked

Yet somehow you still keep replying to me, no matter how many times you claim to be done.

Regardless, what I posted wasn't a straw man, it was a statement. It's only a straw man if it purports to be a rephrasing of your argument, so that I can refute that rephrasing as if it were your actual argument.

See the difference?


No?


Well, that's not my problem.

[GeorgeGist]

44. I think you're being obnoxious.

[Orrex]

46. Well, at least I know what a straw man is.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

67. Not when you bring them to the party you don't.

And I'll show you the straw man you

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

65. Thank you. Good grief, you'd think I'd killed his puppy or something.

[B2G]

38. Why did you even start this thread

if you weren't going to politely entertain the answers?

[Orrex]

39. It's my fault for attacking her.

Or something.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

89. Why should I politely entertain impolite answers like yours? The correct answer is:

There is no reason I should. Sorry you're so obsessed with this thread that you need to hang around with nothing to add. Sorry, but I'm just not that into you.

[DebJ]

107. I'd be annoyed even if he was talking about the weather or his grand daughter that loudly.

That's just freaking RUDE.

I'd like to think I'd have the nerve to ask him to be quiet, but I couldn't guarantee it.

But I can say that I understand Dark n Stormy's discomfort and her position.

Even 'nice' chatter that is loud and over-bearing is rude and ignorant and should not happen
in public. When that volume pounded into your ears is something you find to be so
obnoxious, that just makes it worse. But even talking about the weather in a blasting
voice is being an asshat.

I think you've been really rough on Dark n Stormy here.

[Orrex]

114. My answer and tone are in line with most of the thread IMO

She has decided that I am attacking her because we had a disagreement in another thread, in which she told me that my consciousness is limited and that I'm unable to comprehend my own posts. Charming.

I agree that the other customer was an asshole, but that's on him. Personally, I can't stand when people talk loudly about sports, but I deal with it because they're not obligated to bow to my preferences.

Judging--as others here have done--from the fact that she's still mad about it so long after the fact, as well as from the fact that she has objected to less-than-congratulatory responses, it's hard to believe that she wanted honest replies. Instead, it looks like she's fishing for praise.

If someone posts a "what should I do?" thread, then that person should recognize that she might get answers that aren't what she wants to hear.

[CTyankee]

23. I've been in that situation at a diner hubby and I like to have lunch at.

There's a bunch of regulars, all old, retired white men who sit at a round table in the center of the room so that all of us in booths could hear every word of their loud whining about "those people" which were either Democrats, liberals or minorities or all three. So I started saying to my husband, "Are you listening to these old geezers? What a bunch of losers!" and the like, and I said it loud enough for the geezers to hear me. I figured it was only fair. I'm a liberal and a Dem so I'll talk loudly about THEM.

Hee hee.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

28. Lol! I frequetly hear RWers loudly talking politics, but seldom does anyone

object.

[CTyankee]

41. Oh, I don't object. But if I have to have my lunch listening to THEIR rant, then they have to

have their lunch listening to MINE...

Fair is fair.

[Eleanors38]

79. Back in the punk rock daze, a buddy feigned sneezing real loud...

in hopes of forcing a fart, as he passed the "offending" table on his way to the restroom. Of course, he had a CinemaScope-wide range of things he considered offensive.

[CTyankee]

100. that's funny...I guess that would be one way to respond...

and entirely possible at this diner since the big attraction on Wednesday is the wonderful fasolada,Greek bean soup, which the diner lists as "Yankee Bean Soup." They have a terrific cook, actually Turkish, who makes that delicious soup and it is wonderful...

have you ever had it? https://www.google.com/#q=greek+bean+soup

[Eleanors38]

106. I fix soup the same, sans tomatoes & olive oil...

If that is the only diff, I'll give it a shot. I usually include a little ham bone, but I can drop that. The Austin area has a couple of high-grade olive orchards.

I love beans and bean soup. I include split pea, lima, black-eyes, pintos, black, etc. on my cooking list.

[B2G]

24. The correct answer is to keep your mouth shut.

You were evesdropping on a private conversation. You're opinion would be neither welcomed or warranted.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

26. OMG. Seriously? I was not eavesdropping on the LOUDmouth at the next booth.

[B2G]

35. The answer remains the same. nt

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

69. Except that the "eavesdropping" part of the answer is clearly inapplicable, so my objection to your

answer remains the same.

[DebJ]

109. Private conversations are not obnoxiously loud. n/t

[B2G]

111. "Loud" is very subjective

And how do you know the person in question wasn't hearing impaired?

[Iggo]

27. Laughed.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

29. What if he'd been talking loudly and negatively about "the gays."

[Iggo]

30. Laughed loudly.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

34. Lulz!

[rrneck]

32. Hey, it was on fire when I got here.

You're not likely to change anybody's mind if they don't know you. If he's making a lot of noise and it's a distraction, about all you can do is tell him to keep it down.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

86. Yes, but I'm not sure that the only reason to speak up when people are spouting RW BS is to

change their minds, which, as you say, is probably not going to happen 99.99% of the time.

[kelliekat44]

40. Hey, people are entitled to their own ignorant opinions. Ignoring them makes them irrelevant.

Irrelevance is sometimes harder on folks than embarrassment.

[Catherine Vincent]

42. My bet is they were loud on purpose

And wanted everyone in ear shot to hear him.

[JoePhilly]

60. That is always the determining factor for ..

... me in those situations.

If I think they are being loud so as to be heard, I may engage.

Even then, I do so humbly, at least as my opening.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

90. Yeah, since we never clearly heard a word spoken at that table until he started in on the "lazy

burger flippers," I have to suspect he was trying to make sure he was heard. Still never heard anyone else at the table. Once he started in on his rant, no one could get a word in edgewise.

[DebJ]

110. I hope the wait staff heard him and 'attended to' his meal appropriately. n/t

[pipi_k]

47. As someone who

suffers from a bit of hearing loss, I often wonder if, someday, somebody in a public place will tell me to STFU when I'm talking too loudly because it's hard for me to gauge how loud I really am.

Things get pretty interesting at my house because Mr Pipi also has some hearing loss.

So we either can't hear each other, or we're constantly accusing the other of "yelling".

My BIL is also a "yeller", but he drove a truck for many years and also lost some of his hearing.


One thing I really wish in this world...that people would stop and consider...first of all...that others around them might be suffering from some actual physical difficulty than assuming someone is just being an obnoxious asshole.

[Orrex]

49. ^^that.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

68. Oh, good grief. So anything's acceptable because there is a tiny chance that there's some secret

Last edited Wed Apr 30, 2014, 02:37 AM - Edit history (1)

reason for it? Nope. Not buying that.

Also, the guy was apparently talking at a normal restaurant volume until the point when he began with the "lazy burger flipper" talk, so it's very unlikely he had a good excuse for loudness.

[pipi_k]

104. Yeah...

crazy concept, I know...giving people the benefit of the doubt.

I mean, it's way more fun to assume others are acting the way they are because they're out to get us...or because they're just inconsiderate assholes.


I dunno...seems to me that in the nearly 1 year since this incident happened, there might have been other things of more importance to wretch about. I know I can carry a grudge sometimes, but wow...this is really stretching it. A loud guy in a restaurant nearly 12 months ago...whooo-wee!

Anyway, I've been a few restaurants in my time as well, and, like nearly everyone else, have been faced with having to sit next to/in back of a Loud Person.

When conversation becomes impossible, I often turn to my inner 9 year old boy for a solution...Mr Pipi and I make little "yak yak yak" hand gestures...or chew with our mouths open at each other...make faces...put on puppet shows with the french fries, etc.

A year later we're still laughing over the good time we had in the restaurant instead of wringing our hands over the Rude Loud Person at the table/booth next to us.

Try it sometime. Life is sad enough as it is without adding our own drama to the mix.

[benld74]

51. I would have sent over drinks, with a note,

From friends of your underpaid staff.

[ecstatic]

53. As much as I'd love to come here with my own "cool story bro,"

I don't engage in discussions like that with strangers. At least not anymore. I don't think you can change the mind of a random ignorant person.

[Blaukraut]

54. Probably would have loudly mocked RW ignorance with hubby

Thing is, my husband and I talk politics constantly, even when we go out to eat. So I wouldn't be surprised if on occasion there might have been RW folks overhearing snippets of our conversation and likely seething, as well.

That's unfortunately how life goes.

[tammywammy]

66. Ignore it.

If they were yelling I'd ask a waiter if they could say something. Why should I let strangers ruin my day? People have the right to have opinions I disagree with.

Ignore it and move on.

[flvegan]

70. I'd have not stamped "Samsonite" on this shit and dragged it around for a year.

People talk. Loudly. Many are stupid. When you have time, I'll introduce you to "the internet" which I think might intrigue you.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

71. Congrats on your awesomeness! I hope they seat all the loud-mouthed RWers next to you, since

you're not bothered.

[LeftyMom]

73. There was an obnoxious herd of loud people taking up most of the place where I ate breakfast today.

I entirely forgot about them about three blocks into driving away after breakfast, until this thread reminded me. If somebody being loudly wrong somewhere within earshot A YEAR AGO is a problem you devote any headspace to at all, either you have no real problems (in which case CONGRATS!) or you should really talk to somebody about your lack of perspective and inability to let small slights go.

[Orrex]

74. ^^That

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

87. Maybe you ought to talk to someone about it taking you three blocks to forget about the

loud obnoxious "herd" where you ate breakfast. Maybe the guy who tuned it out and didn't even notice it could recommend someone for you to talk to about your lack of perspective and inability to not be reminded of it just because someone mentions a similar situation.

[pipi_k]

105. Wha????

Her lack of perspective?


OK, here's some perspective for ya...

If you had become homeless or unemployed in the year since that incident, how much would it matter now?

If someone you loved became seriously ill or died, how much would that loud guy in a restaurant matter today?

All those people who lost homes...friends...family...in the past few days due to devastating tornadoes in the south...I'll bet any one of them would gladly trade their problems with your one-year-old gripe about a loud man in a restaurant.


That's perspective.

[cherokeeprogressive]

75. I would have turned them out in about 30 seconds.

The same way I tune out fox when I'm in a store. Nobody fucks with my good mood or my good time. I don't let them. Sounds like you should give it a try. One year later and you remember specific strangers because of a dinner conversation you heard... I simply could not go through life like that.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

85. I also remember a really good book my 5th grade teacher read to us. Along with many other

things both good and bad, so, not really that remarkable that I remember it and the fact that it was annoying. If you have the ability to tune out FOX, that's excellent, but most people can't tune out loud, annoying noises, so, again, not that odd that I can't. Though, yeah, it would be great if I could.

[ZombieHorde]

76. Nothing. nt

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

84. Wow. I'd have expected more from a zombie.

[MADem]

80. Ask your server, sweetly, if he or she could ask the people in the booth to pipe down

because their conversation was loud, strident and ruining the mood...?

Or simply said, yourself, "Could you lower your voice? You're yelling and everyone can hear you. This isn't a barroom, it's a dining establishment!"

You would be able to dish him a dose of shame without even commenting on WHAT he was saying. You could be a total tool to him; even give him some faux sympathy by pretending to not understand what he said, and come up with something like

"Look, I'm sorry you aren't making enough money on minimum wage, or whatever your problem is, but the rest of us are trying to eat and we really don't need to hear you air your personal financial problems. Maybe you should go to a more affordable restaurant if you aren't being paid enough...?"

If he protested and insisted he was wealthy and OWNED those fast food franchises, you could suggest "Well, perhaps you might want to have dinner there, and talk as loudly as you'd like!"

Yeah, the last tactic is pretty shitty, it's basically calling the guy out for being a bigmouth, but someone who is deliberately obtuse as to the fact that the minimum wage hasn't kept pace with inflation deserves to have his conversations convoluted!

He'll probably be bullshit at being thought of as "poor" and that's enough to ruin his meal--hey, fair play if he ruins yours...

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

82. To speak to him, we'd have had to stand up and walk around to his table, since the booths there

are so tall that we couldn't even see him or anyone in his party until we stood up to leave (which is another fact that tells that he'd begun talking very loudly once he started the "minimum wage evil" talk--we'd barely heard a word anyone at this table had said before that.) So, probably asking the server to handle it would have been ideal if we'd thought of it before dessert was delivered. After that, we had to go find him to ask for the bill. (It was late and we there were only 5 tables still occupied at that time.)

[MADem]

115. Better still (of course this is all speculation for a future incident at this stage...!)

ask your server to send the MANAGER to your table, and explain the deal to him/her. That way, the poor server doesn't get stuck being on the front lines!

I do enjoy playing the "pretend to misunderstand" game with people who are insufferable like that--after you get to a certain age they'll assume you're hard of hearing and that makes it hard for them to screech angrily. It really throws people off their stride; they're crabbing about people making minimum wage, you're giving them a heap of faux pity for MAKING minimum wage--as though their expensive clothes and shoes look like they were WALMART cast-offs bought at the GOODWILL!

Picture this: You get up, trundle over to that jerk's table with a few bucks in your hand, and say sweetly with a big smile, "I heard you yelling loudly and a bit frantically about the minimum wage...I do know it's hard to make ends meet, could you use a little help paying your food bill? Here's a few dollars...I hope they raise your pay soon!"

If he crabs angrily and disabuses you of the notion that he's poor, you smile some more and say "Now, now....what would Jeeeeeesus do? I'll donate these few dollars to the poor with you in mind!" And wander on back to your table!

Nothing like shaming with a smile!

[JEB]

81. Let him advertise his ignorance.

Or if you absolutely must do something, a swift hard kick to the groin.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

83. Ha. Thanks for the laugh!

[Separation]

91. LOL

I have a history of saying things to people who are bugging me in public, usually idiots who won't shut up in the movie theater, and it always mortifies my husband. So, as it was our anniversary and I didn't want to embarrass my husband, I decided I would not let the RW blabbermouth incite me to any behavior that would make my husband uncomfortable.

He along with %99 percent of the husbands out there always hate this. The last thing we want to do is fight some other dude because, that's normally the way it just ends up.

Not saying this is you but here is the example.

Woman one, "Loud talking blah blah, I hate those POS libs, Blah Blah."
Man one, rolls his eyes and sighs.

Woman two. "You should really keep your voice down, and not be so disruptive please."
Man two, rolls his eyes and sighs.

Woman one, "Oh, no you did not just tell me how to live my life bitch!"
Man one, mutters, "fuck" under his breath.

Woman two, looks to you and said can you believe what this bitch just called me? Are you just gonna stand there?!
Man two, mumble something under his breath and then says, 'hey c'mon now we are all adults here, lets just settle down."

Woman one."Looks to her man and says, you gonna take this shit?)"
Man one mumbles under his breath. and asks the other dude "if he just wants to split and go catch the UFC fight down at Buffalo Wild Wings."

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

92. Um, no. Not in my experience. But maybe on the Crass Housewives of New Jersey or some such.

It's usually guys talking during the quiet songs at a concert or in a movie theater who I speak to. My husband is 6'4", 230lbs. And, he just does not want to take unfair advantage of his physical dominance (which is cool) and, I think, goes too far in the opposite direction just to be sure.

I mean, really. He would eat a badly burned meal rather than send it back. As long as you're not rude about it, I can't imagine why a person should pay for something unsatisfactory.

[Niceguy1]

94. the appropriate thing to do is nothing.

Besides ignoring the person....
If he was spouting racial epithets then I would complain to management. But basic right-wing talking points arent cause for complaints or disruptive confrontations where YOU would be the rude person.

[mstinamotorcity2]

97. Ignorant people have a way

of letting you know they are Ignorant (lack of knowledge). By opening their moth and speaking You don't have to answer to such silliness. Their world is catching up to them. They still don't know they are the 47%!!!!!

[MineralMan]

101. I'm pretty sure that moving to another table is

about the only thing you can do in such a situation. Confronting the boorish person never seems to work out well in a public place like that. Generally it just leads to more raised voices and ugliness, since boors don't mind being boorish.

Public places like restaurants are difficult if you get seated near a boor. I don't know of any way to improve the situation without moving to a different part of the restaurant. It's always a risk.

One thing you might try if you return to that restaurant is to ask to be seated in some quiet part of the restaurant, explaining that it's an important occasion or something. Generally, they'll accommodate you in that way. But making the scene worse is certainly not a good way to make your dining experience any better.

[gwheezie]

102. I might be a little more passive aggressive than some

I would have loudly heaped praise on my server and requested to speak to the manager and again heap praise on the server, stating "they certainly work very hard for the money they make"and smile sweetly.

[Nye Bevan]

103. Was this actually a nice restaurant, or more of an Applebees-type establishment?

The way you keep referring to "booths" makes me suspect the latter, in which case loudish conversation is more acceptable than in a more upscale place.

If someone is talking too loudly in a place where that is inappropriate, you can ask them to be a little quieter, or you can ask the waiter to ask them. This is not rocket science. And the political content of what they are saying is supremely irrelevant. When I am having a quiet dinner I don't want to hear any loud speech, whether it is praising Ted Cruz, Newt Gingrich, President Obama, Pope Francis, or anyone at all.

[Mr_Rogers]

108. You did right...

Mind your own business...

[closeupready]

112. Put in my earbuds/music and put on my sunglasses.

[ScreamingMeemie]

113. I get the feeling, in reading through this thread, that one cannot express an opinion

that does not mesh with yours without being yelled at. Here goes anyway:

I accept the fact that when I go out in public, I'm going to hear people say stupid stuff that I don't agree with. I value my blood pressure and heart health, so I try to ignore them as best I can... knowing that engaging someone as insufferable as that is a waste of time.


Yeah, it sucks, but I wouldn't let it ruin my memories...not color my happiness.