An Abortion Story...

What if any repercussions did he suffer? He should have.

And she was too scared to report it.

Family matters, and all that.

My Mom... now all of 84 years old... had four miscarriages before I was born.

Her Doctor in the 1950's told her she was an "habitual aborter" and would never carry a child to term.

I'm the oldest, and the only boy, of four children. And I love my three sisters.

There was another miscarriage between the sisters... mom doesn't talk about that, because...

She doesn't want us considering the possibilities.

She just wants us to love each other.

And we do...

AND it wasn't lost on me that, in doing the math... I'm damned lucky to be here too.

BTW... Mom is STILL vehemently Pro-Choice.

DULink: http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021189621

I held hands with, and took several women to, Planned Parenthood for their DNC's back in the mid to late 70's.

I was not the lover/father of the fetus of any one of them.

I was their friend... and when the ACTUAL guy was informed of these women's decision...

They all curiously found themselves... indisposed.

So I took them, and hugged them, and held their hands.

And I can tell you this...

It is NOT an easy decision... it is NOT easily done... it is NOT a procedure one would want to have... and it is NOT easily forgotten.

And I figured that out... from the waiting room to the parking lot.

Yeah... I have a bit of attitude about the subject.

So sue me.

She had 7 children and 3 miscarriages. One child died at 3 months. We have a rare disease or disorder or something that carries down from the mother. I If you are pregnant with a boy, if he gets it you will miscarry. I have one brother and 5 sisters. The baby who died was a girl as well. I have 3 girls and had one miscarriage. I believe it was a boy but have no way to be sure.

That everybody else should shut the F* Up !!!

We have WAY to many busy-bodies in our society.

And thank you for your personal story... it meant a lot.

or a doctor for that matter, got all up into their 'man business'. Let's regulate every wet dream a guy has!! tell him he has to report it every time he masturbates because he's killing all those potential babies sperm are.

She had been pregnant with twins, the first died in utero and miscarried. Now, 2 weeks later, the 2nd showed abnormalities and was going to die also. So she came in to get an abortion, to clear it all out rather than waiting for the fetus to die, to recover and try again. A couple yrs later she brought her new baby by for us to see.

It's not all that simple out there.

A woman was pregnant, early 20's, came in for an early abortion. She came back 6 months later for another abortion. She managed to get a job that wasn't selling her body, partnered up with a man, now her child is a teenager.

It's not all that simple out there.

A woman was pregnant, teenager. Abortions were not accessible and she could not afford to travel to where they were. She had her baby, gave it up for adoption, returned home and drank herself to death before she reached 30.

It's not all that simple out there.

A woman was pregnant, early 40's. She came for an abortion as she had no desire to risk fetal abnormalities risk with her age, her body risk with her age, or have a child in any manner. She waved and said "byebye junior" after the abortion, walked out and didn't look back.

It's not that simple out there.

for someone who knew someone so off she went as she feared her family would have kicked her out of the house. Bleeding massively back home, her parents figured it out, got her medical help and she survived. And they did not kick her out as she feared, but started speaking out, working towards getting safe, legal, hygienic medical abortions accessible for those who were in need of such as they did not want any others to suffer as they did.

A woman had an abortion as she had no desire to have a child, to be a mom. A year later, I ran into her with her new baby as after having the abortion, she decided she did want to, so did. She still supports the right to a legal, hygienic medical abortion.

A woman had an abortion, went home to pick up her kids from school, make supper, do evening things with them.

on and on and on and on and on. No one story. No one emotion. Support the right to chose a legal, hygienic, affordable medical abortion.

It was interesting, figuring out how to deal with so many different people and situations, and help them as they wanted it. Learning how to not cast judgements as no matter what we knew, we didn't know the whole story. And hearing so many stories, from heavy to light to in between of all shades of grey. Women have always been able to get abortions, if they have money. It is returning to that now, and I continue to fight and support the right to access, to affordability, to the right to chose medically and healthily.

"but what about contraception, education, support?" Of course. All that is necessary and often not available enough. But even when it is, still, the woman's right to chose legal, affordable, accessible, hygienic medical is necessary.

"but what about promoting good choices, learning to take responsibility"? Argh. No matter what you think you know about someone else, you never. ever. ever. know enough to be able to judge. Ever.

to judge them. And why the HELL is it ANYONE's right to judge someone else? grrr.

So many here don't get it or don't care and it's maddening.

I posted that my abortion was a positive experience because the pregnancy was not.

Days like this, I wonder what I'm still doing here.

giving me hope for humanity.

You too. What a day. Thank you PeaceNikki!

Suddenly women were no longer at the mercy of their bodies and could plan things, like getting an education and a more than minimum wage job. Legal Abortion access gradually became more prevalent, also giving females more choice.

No longer was it necessary to put your life on hold, indefinitely, unless you chose to. No longer was it necessary to marry young and feel stuck. If you wanted to, fine. If you chose to limit your child bearing, fine.

This all freed up half the population to do more, to be able to do more, than just being slaves to their bodies. I remember being asked my reproductive plans when interviewing for my first professiional job as a young adult. It took me aback, but it was during the changeover time when employers could and did ask, could and did use it to decide if you were going to be a long term or short term employee. If you were young and married, or dating, you would probably be taking years off for child bearing, raising as you had no control.

And why didn't fertile females Just Say No to sex? Like people since the beginning of recorded history at the minimum, people are sexual creatures, they have sex. They get pregnant. They marry and have full sized 7 month "premies". So many people of my grandparent's age fell into this category (early 1900's) and since. Prior to that too but they I did not know personally.

So. The stories I give have been changed for privacy's sake. But they are all true, some from the 70's, some more recent. Yes, the woman who came in for a repeat abortion in a yr made me stop and discuss with my co-workers as to why one was ok, but multiples not. One Catholic co-worker finally quit, another continued. As a member of no organized religion but my own, as a young adult, I had to learn fast, think fast, then think long, and come up with no matter what I knew about someone and their situation, I did not know enough.

The woman who no-showed? I ran into her later and she told me about running into "abortion counselors" who talked and called and showed up over and over and she felt confused and guilty and so did not get the 9 wk abortion as she'd scheduled. A month later she realized her whole life would fall apart for reasons I can not share, so got an abortion then and it was awful.

Even knowing what I knew, still I did not know enough to judge her. Just give the support I could and the ear I had.

If people would spend time working with, LISTENING to women seeking abortions, they might understand better. If women who have had abortions felt safe enough to talk about theirs, the whys, how, whens, etc, without being judged or experiencing negative stuff, it would help. But having to share intimate details should not be needed. Just people who are willing to listen, think, not judge. And to understand that no matter what you think you know about someone, whether stranger, acquaintance, friend, sibling, parent, child, you do not know enough.

The girls with supportive parents will probably consult with them anyway, whereas those with less-than-supportive folks... Well, I probably don't have to say it...

cases in which the daddy/step-daddy IS the father of the baby. Yeah, it happens. Far, far more often than anyone wants to admit. You think they'll give their consent? And what if the girl's mother had no idea it was happening and doesn't want to know? And what if the girl's mother DOES know and blames the daughter for seducing her husband? And the pregnant female is supposed to go ask daddums and mummsie for their permission? People have no idea what girl children go through. None.

We have parental notification laws in WI.

One to SIDS. Another at age 5 to leukemia.

She became pregnant. Could not face having a child, or even being pregnant.

She sought an abortion. She found a provider. The nurse told her, "Don't worry, honey, his hands don't shake so bad when he's drunk."

It was an illegal abortion, and she was desperate enough to accept the risk, because either way she wouldn't survive the pregnancy. She was married; she had money; and obviously, she had no other children anymore. Most people will understand immediately why she didn't want to be pregnant while she was still mourning.

She survived the abortion.

She does not regret her abortion. She does not want another woman to have to go through a procedure on a kitchen table with a drunken, disgraced doctor.

So much heartbreak. Keep the choice for a legal, hygienic medical abortion.

The main character is a boy (toby mcguire) who lives in an orphanage. The doctor there takes him as his assistant basically when he gets older. Basically this is a place women can go to have their baby and leave it there or the doctor will perform an abortion. Now this is an older time period. So the abortions are hush hush. Throughout the movie the doctor and the boy have debates about abortion. Though Homer, the boy, refuses to help with the abortions he does help deliver babies.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0124315/

And you might find 'The World According To Garp' (same author) hilariously instructively as well.