Facts: Genetically Modified Berry compared to Organic Berry:

[MrScorpio]

Note that the modified specimen is bloated to about 3 times the mass of the common berry. Advanced rot has set in prior to maturity and tests revealed 78% more lactic acid in the modified organism.

Upon contact with the modified berry, the picker’s hands exhibited a rash which is clearly visible on the fingers and should not be mistaken for juice stains acquired during picking. While the common berry, of course, has no ill effects on the skin, the modified organism had an effect similar to poison oak and swelling set in shortly after the photo was taken. The discoloration and pain lasted approximately 12 hours with treatment including Neosporin and Syrup of Ipecac.

At 16 hours the specimen went missing and could not be monitored for decay rates. While the common berry remained, the modified berry was spotted the next Tuesday at the corner of Wallace and 12th St. Having grown another meter and a half, the genetically modified berry murdered two prostitutes and became the target of a cross country manhunt. It was last seen on February 20th in Boulder, CO where it has joined with several bananas from the Monsanto corporation and stolen at least two shotguns from the Boulder Police Department.

A manifesto was released online suggesting that the berries intend to strike at our nurseries, killing our young and replacing them with further modified organisms which we will raise as our own. They also intend to “free their enslaved brothers” by treating common fruits and possibly vegetables with mutagens.

The head of the FDA could not be reached for comment as he has gone missing. Only a glass of unidentified red fluid was found in his office, labeled “Extra Pulp”.

http://facts-i-just-made-up.tumblr.com/post/44120689363/genetically-modified-berry-compared-to-organic

[Agschmid]

1. Ha

Good thing I read the whole thing...

[ZombieHorde]

2. I have been uncertain about the GMO controversy, but this is pretty bad.

We can't have berries running around killing people. *We are the ones who knocks.*

[dixiegrrrrl]

5. Esp. after that incident with the Killer Tomatoes!!!!

[ZombieHorde]

6. We all hoped that was just an isolated incident.

We were wrong.

[pinboy3niner]

3. There are reports that modified berries have knocked on my neighbors' doors

When my neighbors ask, "Who is it?" they hear: "...Candygram."

[nadinbrzezinski]

4. Ok I get tipped over the circus downtown

but not over the GMO berry murdering people? I am going to take it up with IPN

Well done...

[ProdigalJunkMail]

7. i almost quit at the rash bit

good thing i let my curiosity get the better of me.

sP

[Half-Century Man]

8. Once again, a great example of why the extra funding from DHS..

...should be used to install tracking devices in the synthetic stocks of police weapon. We would already have this wild berry and his monkey bait partners in custody if the NRA hadn't lobbied against it.

[Motown_Johnny]

9. Obviously....