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Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:03 PM

Me vs. every Evangelical that I meet.


Me: How old is the earth?

Evangelical: Seven thousand years old.

Me: How old is the universe?

Evangelical: We aren't sure, maybe seven thousand years old, maybe forever.

Me: How long has God been around?

Evangelical: Oh, well, God has been around forever.

Me: So, how can we human earth creatues be THAT important if God has been around for all time and we've only been around for seven thousand years?! How special are we? What was God doing with all of his free time?


* crickets *





29 replies, 3045 views

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Arrow 29 replies Author Time Post
Reply Me vs. every Evangelical that I meet. (Original post)
TeamProg Oct 12 OP
Hugh_Lebowski Oct 12 #1
PXR-5 Oct 12 #2
TeamProg Oct 12 #4
Sibelius Fan Oct 12 #3
mahina Oct 12 #5
Lars39 Oct 12 #6
mahina Oct 12 #11
njhoneybadger Oct 12 #7
mahina Oct 12 #12
walkingman Oct 12 #8
PXR-5 Oct 12 #9
mahina Oct 12 #13
RVN VET71 Oct 12 #24
TeamProg Oct 12 #15
mahina Oct 12 #17
FoxNewsSucks Oct 12 #20
PatrickforB Oct 12 #26
mahina Oct 12 #27
ret5hd Oct 12 #10
jcgoldie Oct 12 #16
LakeArenal Oct 12 #14
fescuerescue Oct 12 #18
hunter Oct 12 #19
TeamProg Oct 12 #28
SarcasticSatyr Oct 12 #21
ananda Oct 12 #22
NNadir Oct 12 #23
lame54 Oct 12 #25
Ford_Prefect Oct 12 #29

Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:08 PM

1. Mysterious ways? (nt)

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:11 PM

2. Twiddling his fingers...

I also have said something similar to church folk, god must have just been sitting around in the dark twiddling his fingers.

So my take is there are at least two ways to take this.

1. God does not exist.

2. If God does exist, then there is life elsewhere in the universe.

Then watch heads explode...

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Response to PXR-5 (Reply #2)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:21 PM

4. Yep. God did not make man in God's own image, man made God in Man's own image!


We made God up to satisfy the big question: why are we here?


We are all cosmic dust, we are all God - at the very most.

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:18 PM

3. Or how about this?

You: How old is the Earth?

Evangelist: Seven-thousand years old

You: You’re stupid.

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:29 PM

5. I've never understood why anyone cares what another person believes.

Unless you love them and want to know to be closer, so what if they believe in God or not, or are evangelical or Muslim or Hindu or whatever. It’s their business, right?

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Response to mahina (Reply #5)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:33 PM

6. Evangelicals don't keep it to themselves.

They believe in The Great Commission, and testifying their faith to everyone. Conversations like the OP usually happens as pushback to stupid statements.

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Response to Lars39 (Reply #6)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:52 PM

11. I have a method for dealing with that and so far it's not failed.

I tell them I will listen to them talk about God *without interrupting* for five minutes and then they have to listen to me talk about politics *without interrupting* for five minutes. I set my stopwatch app and say OK, go!

Door knockers and general God botherers of all faiths and none fall to this method and never bring it up again.

My five minutes consist of telling them why any faith is inconsistent with republican or “conservative” politics

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Response to mahina (Reply #5)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:37 PM

7. You'll care when 6 Supreme Court Religous fanatics go rogue.

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Response to njhoneybadger (Reply #7)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:53 PM

12. I care deeply about their judgment and the law.

They could believe personally in the Great Favad. Maybe they do.

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Response to mahina (Reply #5)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:41 PM

8. You should care because they are mainly responsible for our present state of lunacy in America.

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Response to mahina (Reply #5)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:44 PM

9. Exactly



I don't care about people's religions.
Just don't try to force them on me or government officials.

It wasn't till I moved to NC did folks judge me because of faith or lack of.

My boss, (owner) at an electronics company makes us pray to Jesus at lunch time, and then on Friday afternoons. I just sit in peace.

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Response to PXR-5 (Reply #9)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:56 PM

13. I have a friend who moved there from Hawaii

Who has since died but when she first got there she stumbled and fell on the street and a whole group of people circled around her and started praying. She freaked and said something on the order of “JFC stop mumbling and help me up!”

She really struggled with making friends there. Poor thing.

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Response to PXR-5 (Reply #9)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 02:25 PM

24. A Department Chair at a school I attended was a Texas Jew

She moved with her career out to America but told me that, while she never had any anti-semitic confrontations, there was always a sense in the air that she was regarded as an outsider, as strange.

Once at a faculty meeting at a school (in Texas) where she’d just been hired as an Assistant Professor, an Associate Professor in her Department asked her what church she went to. “Oh, none, actually. I’m jewish” was her answer. The Associate Professor looked sad, seriously, and said “Oh, I’m. . . I'm so sorry.”

Now it’s possible that the Associate Professor was apologizing for what he thought was a faux pas that may have embarrassed the person he was talking to. Kind of odd, if that were the reason he apologized, like he’d gotten her to publicly admit an embarrassing secret, but possible.

But my Department Chair just grinned and shook her head because she was almost certain the apology was a genuine expression of good ole christian sorrow that she had not found Jesus and was, therefore, going to hell.

Evangelicals may be candy coated sweet and shiny on the outside, but that’s because, inside where it counts, they are filled with the sweetly smug spiritual syrup of salvation (I loves me some consonance!) because they know they got their ticket to heaven and you -- jews especially -- do not.

(I have to add that the Department Chair of whom I speak loved Texas and loved Texans, generally. She was able to laugh at the encounter described above because she knew he intended no insult by his unwittingly anti-semitic comment.)

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Response to mahina (Reply #5)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 01:07 PM

15. When a group is counting on the Rapture and voting to make it so, that concerns me.

Seriously, is that okay with you?

What people believe motivates their politics. So yes, we SHOULD ALL care deeply.

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Response to TeamProg (Reply #15)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 01:15 PM

17. I just think everybody has a right to their own religion

The relationship with God or Akua or Pele or Vishnu or Allah is none of my business.

Just like my faith is none of theirs.

Amy and Boof should not be on the court and are a nightmare. McConnell is a fucking hypocrite for bringing Amy up before Ruth Bader Ginsberg was even in the ground after keeping Garland out for nine months. Boof was just disqualified by his own actions in public and on camera, obviously unfit and certainly a predator.

We can worship whatever they want and so can I.

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Response to mahina (Reply #5)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 01:54 PM

20. If they'd mind their own business, and stop trying to legislate

that everyone else live by their stupid beliefs, no one else would care.

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Response to mahina (Reply #5)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 02:52 PM

26. That is fine, but unfortunately 'evangel' implies they want to 'convert' you

to believe in their dogma.

This is where the Christians got it all wrong. You cannot measure success by the number of 'converts,' the number of souls 'harvested.' For humanity, salvation is collective, and the way I'm using it, the term 'salvation' simply means to grow up as a species and begin planning around human need instead of human greed, and to be such good stewards over this planet that it and all life upon it thrives.

Imagine this world actually being a good place, a healthy place, a peaceful place where everyone has enough!

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Response to PatrickforB (Reply #26)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 02:54 PM

27. I like your thinking better.

I completely agree

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 12:50 PM

10. Masturbating. And ice cream.

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Response to ret5hd (Reply #10)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 01:07 PM

16. yeah but

Like to make ice cream he needed cows and cows live on earth soooo... thats obviously why he couldn't smoke weed either even though he totally would have if there was an earth to grow dope on... sooo... he must have been just jacking off since he was the only one around to play with...

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 01:03 PM

14. I know many Christian people who are not Christian assholes

Maybe some organized religions are a problem. I even know a fair minded Evangelical devotee. He employed me and paid me well although I was a an argumentative liberal Democrat who didn’t believe in god let alone being “reborn” in christ. That had to remind him often that JESUS WAS/IS A JEW. Christianity was made up much later and it keeps changing the rules since then.

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 01:17 PM

18. I don't think I've ever talk to one

Well maybe I have.

But I've have never approached to talk about the age of the Earth.

I would just give them a weird look and go on my way.

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 01:24 PM

19. Hunter to Evangelicals: Fuck off.

There's really no arguing with them.

Tolerating anti-intellectualism of any sort, religious or secular, is always a bad idea.

I can argue religion all day, but arguing with people who don't accept observed scientific reality is pointless.

If any god created the fossil record and the stars in the sky 7,000 years ago just test our faith then he's a dangerous psychopath who should be locked away before he hurts anyone else.



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Response to hunter (Reply #19)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 05:44 PM

28. !!!!

So true.

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 02:00 PM

21. My sister is one of these people ...

And she has been increasingly irrational for many years. the one thing I've learned is that it is almost impossible to talk most of these people out of their beliefs.

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 02:03 PM

22. "We aren't sure, maybe seven thousand years old, maybe forever."

Seriously, how did this person manage to pass kindergarten?

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 02:09 PM

23. That's a good one. Rather original I think.

I have to say I never thought of it.

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 02:44 PM

25. This is not his first attempt...

He keeps trying but evangelicals always form and screw the whole thing up

A glitch not even God can fix

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Response to TeamProg (Original post)

Tue Oct 12, 2021, 07:11 PM

29. I've always thought there was something wrong with people who

believe in magical events and beings yet castigate Harry Potter as the work of the Devil.

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