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Thu May 20, 2021, 11:38 PM

I'm certain President Biden will be blamed for this too

The MAGAts have something new to complain about.


I was driving to work today and decided to put my radio on the NASCAR channel. The subject of discussion was numbers.

Since most of you don’t follow NASCAR...as Darrell Waltrip put it, what makes a car go fast is on the hood. Each team’s biggest sponsor is their hood sponsor. When the announcers talk about Kevin Harvick and the Busch Ford, or Jimmie Johnson and the Ally Chevrolet, they’re naming the hood sponsor. Hood sponsorship is really expensive...$15 to $25 million depending on the team and how good the race shop’s negotiator is. For their money, they get to advertise on the hood, both rear quarter panels and the bumpers.

Right now, each race car carries a number in the middle of the doors and on the roof. Keep that in mind.

In 2022 NASCAR is introducing a new car, the Next Gen. It features smaller rear quarter panels than the current car, so the teams have gone to NASCAR and asked them to push the side numbers back about a foot so that sponsor logos can go on the doors.

And as a result, two-thirds of our Trumpist population is up in arms.

The host of the show had some fun with this one guy who was really pissed...

“Are you calling into the show on a cell phone?” Yes.
“So you’re not calling from the wall phone in the kitchen?” No.
“Do you heat your house with coal?” No.
“Do you light your house with oil lamps?” No.
“Do you cook on a wood stove?” No.
“Did you ride your horse to work this morning?” No, I don’t even have a horse.
“Are you listening to this show on a Victrola?” No.

“Well then, I see you’re okay with change.”
“But I don’t want my NASCAR to change!”

So yeah, I figure that flake Marjorie Greene will post a tweet claiming that not only did Biden steal all the Chick-fil-A sauce, he made NASCAR violate the sacred Numbers In The Middle of the Door tradition at the same time. I heard he’s also responsible for athlete’s foot and excessive farting.

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