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Wed Feb 10, 2021, 08:11 PM

Trump Replaces Legal Team with Eric and Don, Jr.

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Infuriated by his lawyers’ miserable performance on the first day of his impeachment trial, Donald J. Trump has replaced them with his two adult sons, Eric and Don, Jr.

Although neither of the Trump boys has a law degree, Don, Jr., called their lack of legal education “our secret weapon.”

“All Dad’s lawyers talked about yesterday was the effing Constitution!” he said. “It was effing boring! No one cares about that bullshit!”

For his part, Eric Trump said he had “no intention” of cracking any law books before serving as his dad’s attorney.

“I’ve never read a book in my life, and I’m, like, super successful,” he said.

Don, Jr.,’s girlfriend, Kimberly Guilfoyle, expressed optimism about the Trump boys’ performance as defense attorneys. “THE BEST IS YET TO COME,” she predicted.

https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-replaces-legal-team-with-eric-and-don-jr

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Reply Trump Replaces Legal Team with Eric and Don, Jr. (Original post)
Zorro Feb 10 OP
Gothmog Feb 10 #1
Tree-Hugger Feb 10 #2
moonscape Feb 10 #3

Response to Zorro (Original post)

Wed Feb 10, 2021, 08:13 PM

1. I love good satire

This is the DU member formerly known as Gothmog.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Wed Feb 10, 2021, 08:19 PM

2. I'd love to see it

Don Jr arguing that daddy is innocent with his come jaw going strong. Eric hoping daddy notices that he's there, too.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Wed Feb 10, 2021, 08:21 PM

3. Before opening the post, I gave

even odds whether this was Borowitz or real.

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