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Mon Sep 17, 2012, 06:50 PM

We use Ann sparingly right now so that people don't get tired of her - one more Mitt lie!

They will use Ann sparingly because she didn’t “humanize” Mitt. That’s what they put her out there for and it didn’t work.

Trouble was, the more she was out there, the less “human” she appeared and she generated even more bad feelings about Mitt. Now, it’s not hard to be warmer than Mitt; after all, your average road rock is warmer than Mitt. But wagging her finger and scolding people for asking legitimate questions damaged the desired “warmth and sincerity” value because she came across as superior, entitled, and disdainful toward people beneath her “status”. And the more they put her out there, the more defensive and nasty she got. How dare “you people” wanting to see our tax returns! We deserve your adoration because we give so much to our church! Mitt is so good and so trustworthy!

Sorry, Annie, but we’re hip to the fact that every penny of your loving gift to your church is fully tax deductible. We also learned that LDS is very aggressive in collecting from their members. They demand their cut before everybody else and the members’ standing inside the church depends on obedience to their requirements. Rich “bishops” can’t slide on their LDS debt without causing extreme discomfort and loss of status in the church.

Too, your demands for trust reminded us that when he wanted to be governor of Massachusetts he also demanded “people” trust him while he withheld and vociferously lied about his tax filings there. And he got caught only after he was made to produce the returns. Oh, yeah, then there’s the Swiss and Cayman Islands accounts and the little off-shore $100 million IRA. But I guess when you’re as “successful” as you and Mitt, it’s easy to forget where you parked a few hundred million for a year or two. That makes us awful tacky and bourgeois for thinking you two might be hiding or postponing collection by IRS and your money grubbing church. Forgive us, Annie. How on earth could “we people” not trust you and Mitt???!!!

The campaign hadn’t found anything else to make Mitt look real, so the GOP shoved Annie out front and she was supposed to convince us Mitt was the best, holiest Eagle Scout ever born. But the only thing she had to put out there was her motherhood and her MS, both of which she used unabashedly to evoke praise and sympathy.

Now everybody knows there’s no more important work than motherhood and mothers deserve every ounce of praise they get. Most of us understand that fewer mothers than ever have the luxury of being full-time moms today. That’s not to minimize Ann Romney’s role, just to acknowledge the hard work and sacrifices of millions of other mothers who are just as deserving (or more so) than Annie. Listening to Annie, we wonder if she even knows they exist, or has a clue how they struggle or how different their struggles are from hers.

The MS worked to a point, because most people are sympathetic to people with illnesses and disabilities. But it only went so far because she has unlimited funds to manage her illness while her husband (and Ryan) make no pretense about their disregard for people suffering without health care. For her personal take on it, I’ve never heard Annie say a word in sympathy for other mothers who need health care, nor have I heard of her working in any way to support or help others with MS (men or women) who are less fortunate than her.

We did hear how dressage was such good therapy for her MS. Well, that’s nice - she’s an animal lover – us, too. Oops, forgot about poor old Seamus for a minute – Never mind! But if dogs aren’t high on her list, she does like horses. Anybody who likes animals can’t be too bad, right? Well, except in Romneyland, where things get squeezed through a whole different prism. Turns out if horses are pricey enough and you classify them as a business, IRS might give you a nice little tax deduction for them. Well, it was worth a try for at least one tax year we know of (um, no, make that the only tax year we sort of know of).

Deductible or not, Annie loves horses according to her and Mitt. Wonder how much she loved the one she got sued over for doping it up to hide the fact it was lame when she sold it? The veterinarians testified it was callous treatment and clearly intended to cover up the damage the animal suffered. Apparently physical therapies, hobbies, innocent animals, and IRS rules present a whole different realm of possibilities for this super honest and religious couple than for us pagan peons. As the song says, “What’s love got to do with it”? Can anybody add a refrain for that tune using the classic line “Screw you and the horse you rode in on”? This was just one more business deal where they tried to get their bucks and screw everybody else, including the poor horse. I swear, Mr. and Mrs. Romney just drip “trustworthy” and “righteous”! Have you people no eyes???!!!

In the wake of the sugary interviews with the oh-so-honest-struggling-and-misunderstood couple, I looked at her and wondered about the young Ann who married the up and coming Mormon outside her faith while she left her own parents sitting outside the temple. Raised in wealth herself, she chose to improve her lot in life by setting her cap for an even better life through the see-me-I’m-a-celebrity-son-of-a-millionaire Mitt. Using all her feminine wiles to land her wealthy, preppy catch, I pictured her flattering him and giggling over his stories about cutting the gay kid’s hair off and walking the blind teacher into the door. Annie said he’s such a prankster and has such a great sense of humor! And surely her dead father forgave her for making him sit outside the temple when, years after his death, she and Mitt had his poor, damned soul “baptised” into the Mormon church. What a guy! What a gal!

Annie was supposed to make us like Mitt. Problem was, it didn’t work. The more people saw her, the less they liked either one of them. Go on and spin it, Mitt! We’ve been tired of her for a long time already.

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