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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsI am so mad right now: What happened in my daughters class today (UPDATE)
Last edited Tue Sep 18, 2012, 11:36 AM - Edit history (1)
She is a Senior and was in her last hour of class. One of the kids made the comment to the teacher that he was old.
The teacher is in his 30's and to a lot of kids that is old. He's also white.
The teacher then went off on a rant.
He said "Well I'm doing pretty well, I've made it past the life expectancy of most black people, and one in three black man are in prison"
My daughter was the only person in class that was not white. She said the kids all laughed and it made her feel really out of place. She was like hey..hello I'm here. She said he also said something about latinos, but at that point she was too upset to pay attention, what he had already said was enough. She left out of the room crying and went straight to the counselor. She said the counselor also took offense and was going to talk to the Principal. We have a meeting with them in the morning at 8:00.
She told me that she has always felt like he didn't like her, and now she knows why. HOW SAD IS THAT?
This is part of what is wrong with the world today and why we can't move past this shit. There are teachers and people who kids look up to making comments like this. WHY???? I'm so angry! That comment had no business being made in the class and what relation does that have to do with kids making an off handed joke about him being old?
UPDATE here: http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=1369071
liberallibral
(272 posts)That's a lot more than "inappropriate"!!!
Give 'em HELL!!! THEY DESERVE IT!!!
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)I'm so angry right now! My husband was really pissed when he found out. Even if that crap were true, it has no business being in the class room and especially not in response to that. I felt so horrible when she was relating that to me, she couldn't stop crying the way it made her feel.
southernyankeebelle
(11,304 posts)the hate like this. I hope she can find justice and something will happen to the teacher.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)I sure hope so, I guess I will find out in the morning.
southernyankeebelle
(11,304 posts)roguevalley
(40,656 posts)about some teachers. Your daughter is a human being who is young and needs support not bullshit from the adults in her life. I apologize for teaching. It really is a better profession than some of its practicioners. HUGS!
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)I love teachers! There are some really awesome ones, especially at her school. It's just when you get a hold of ones like him, they give a bad rap to teachers, and that is not fair.
roguevalley
(40,656 posts)and report this. that teacher needs his ears pinned back. kids this age need support and confidence. Tell her I think she's wonderful.
renie408
(9,854 posts)I was down there taking the school apart once a month.
We homeschool now for that reason. I am sorry for you and your daughter. It is a sick feeling to have to send your child to school every day without knowing what kind of crazy bullshit is going to get shoved in their face, not by the other students, but by the TEACHERS.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)I really don't think homeschooling at this point is the answer for us. She is in her senior year, and I would feel like if we did that over his stupidity, then he would win. All her other teachers are outstanding. It's just a teacher who is an insensitive asshole.
freshwest
(53,661 posts)Very worst thing we ever had a teacher say, and he was from the North, was all southerners were stupid. He also made crude sexist remarks and oogled the girls. He was shunned by the students and we all talked behind his back.
We never said anything about age or race or sexual orientation, we all knew who was what. The school had several thousand of students attending classes daily over a large campus. It was in a working class area with different races, all the buildings constructed by the WPA.
I'm sorry that this generation is putting up with people who are so ignorant, petty and hateful. No respect being shown in the place where proper behavior is supposed to be modeled. I'm very sorry for your daughter and hope that the teacher is reprimanded and made to apologize.
If he can't control himself enough to keep his nasty remarks out of the class room where impressionable young people are forced to be there in order to learn, he has no business teaching.
:grouphug; to your girl.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)It sounds like that teacher you had was ignorant and just plain disgusting with the girls. I'm glad that the students didn't put up with it, and he was rightfully shunned.
When my husband was in school, it was desegregated when he was in the Third grade. All of a sudden he was integrated into another school, and had to make new friends. It was hard on him at first, as it would have been for any kid, but you know what? He made life long friends. He is 50 now, and they still keep in touch. My mother in law said that she had just as many white kids as black kids in her house and they all called her "Momma Bea".
renie408
(9,854 posts)And there were many factors in us deciding to homeschool. I recognize it isn't for everybody or even possible for everybody. We had multiple teachers ridiculing my daughter for our lack of religious beliefs, for her liberal views...it was pretty bad. On top of which, she is very mildly dyslexic and it was interfering with her reading, but the school system would not get us any help. They wanted to put a kid who tests close to genius (when we had her independently tested by a tutoring company that had tests which adjusted for her mild LD) into remedial classes. She would have been in remedial language arts, 'regular' history and taking Algebra III in the 10th grade. It was all just very frustrating.
goclark
(30,404 posts)Take a list of concerns
take someone with you
take notes
It's early in the semester...
Better still.... check your mail at du
Walk away
(9,494 posts)His reply was wrong in just about every way you can think of. He needs to be retrained and be taken out of class until he is. Hopefully your daughter will get a different teacher. This man should not be shaping any child's mind and especially a child that isn't white.
The school board should also offer counseling to the entire class.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)It shouldn't matter if he was teased about being old. They tend to think anyone over 30 is old. I would think a teacher would know that it is the mindset of kids. What he said back really had no relation to it or place in the classroom. Why would someone in their 30's take offense to that comment so much they go off on a rant about race? I don't get it.
Butterbean
(1,014 posts)SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)I don't understand what's wrong with him!
Cha
(295,899 posts)manifest trying to hurt someone else..kinda like mitt romney.
roody
(10,849 posts)I am 59. They gasp and I say, "my dad is 92!
a la izquierda
(11,784 posts)I'm a college professor and I'm 35. My students think I'm young. Even if they didn't, I don't care if they think I'm young OR old. My job is to teach them, not care about their opinions of my age.
Horse with no Name
(33,956 posts)He told us to look him up when we were his age and he would buy us a beer and then we could tell him if we really thought he was old or not,lol.
The guy was ex-Marine Sgt. Very gruff but never in a million years would he have denigrated anyone like this--and this was in the 1970's.
We have thoroughly digressed.
Hatred is en vogue these days....
I hope the teacher gets fired. He has no business around young minds. Perhaps he can find suitable employment cleaning toilets in port-a-potties at the Nascar track or something.
Shitty Mitty
(138 posts)He needs a psychiatric evaluation.
tama
(9,137 posts)if the teacher had been black?
2ndAmForComputers
(3,527 posts)tama
(9,137 posts)to understand better.
Inappropriate all around.
Silly foolish at best but just plain ignorant.
tama
(9,137 posts)the race issue in US. Just observe that it's inflammated and gets people very angry, and seek to understand better.
has been inflammatory since slavery and institutionalized American racist segregation/apartheid. America and some americans have always had to be forcibly dragged screaming to the alter of justice for all. A gender of people had to fight to get their rights in this country. Whole races of people had to fight to get the basic human right to be recognized, under the law, as an equal human being along with the right to the 'privilege' of voting. Don't try to hard to understand American racism except that it is with us Americans for the long haul. Some people just cannot come to grips with the fact that people different than them in gender, sexual orientation and race can be just as smart, mean, hurt as anyone on this planet. To start a study I would recommend 'Before the Mayflower' A History of the Negro in America 1619-1964, Lerone Bennett Jr. Pelican Publishers. Project Gutenberg might have an ebook. Also 'The Destruction of Black Civilization' Great issues of a Race from 4500 b.c.-2000 a.d .by Chancellor Williams, third world press. These will start to explain what is going on with the races. good luck
tama
(9,137 posts)a very left-libertarian activist and journalist, helped me understand a little bit of it, by saying that also he's a racist and so is every other American. I guess he was referring to a very complex collective emotional bundle of fear and guilt and anger that takes a Jung to dissolve, and then some.
very large bundle.
patrice
(47,992 posts)in both directions:
"Some people just cannot come to grips with the fact that people different than them in gender, sexual orientation and race can be just as smart, mean, hurt as anyone on this planet."
That fact knows no color/sex line and if I think it does, then I'd be a racist or a sexist.
That said, my basic principle is that responsibility for what happens lies wherever the majority of the power, by even the slimmest of margins, happens to be in a given situation.
In a recent experience my son had in a training situation, in which a member of the larger ethnic group emotionally bullied an obviously vulnerable member of the significantly smaller ethnic group, it was the responsibility of someone in the larger ethnic/social group to do something appropriate to intervene. That didn't happen and now another, vulnerable, young lady is now un-employed.
True story.
my statement is true as stated. Yes, per your obvious attempt at balance, it can work both ways everyday. No argument here. Yes, wrong is wrong no matter who is in any situation or is the majority of persons, no matter the race, gender ect. My point was and is SOME Americans have had to be dragged to the alter of understanding that "all people are created equal", ring a bell? And certain races, genders and people of different sexual orientations are still fighting that battle to be as equal in the eyes of certain members of American society. That vulnerable young lady is a victim of the the brutality created by the injustice, ignorance and stupidity of an American culture that still judges strength and vulnerability based on gender and racial traits. I am sorry for her and I have spoken up when a person who was perceived as weaker was attacked, verbally, by the stronger gender. No problem with all that. I hope she finds legal recourse against whomever, if warranted. If you took offense at my statement? I can't help that. What is true about American history and culture is true. Period!
muntrv
(14,505 posts)ejbr
(5,852 posts)he was saying humorous.
RKP5637
(67,030 posts)AM/FM here, for example, and much of it was filled with hate radio and RW religion. And the first station I turned to was featuring ripping Obama to shreds. How far do these hate-jocks go before it's really deemed out of control, un-American and terrorist stations, and a threat to national security. I think some of them border on it ...
They've been embarrassed to say what they think - they at least knew it was wrong. Rushbo and his ilk are getting them to think they can say these things out loud again.
Zax2me
(2,515 posts)Young, in military. White.
As usual, in wait situation for couple hours after hours of hurry up.
Hot, middle of July. We are out in it.
Whites outside in shade trees, several African-American troops on bus. No particular reason.
While sitting outside under trees, someone remarks - 'look at those stupid black people sitting on that hot bus'
I got tired of sitting on ground - went on bus.
Someone remarks 'Look at all those stupid white people, sitting out in the heat.'
It has stayed with me all my life because of the pure silly flippant absurdities of the comments yet almost exactly the same. As a joke I often tell, but a life lesson that people are people.
One and the same, equals no matter how much culture and crime and politics and money or anything else may interfere. When the roulette wheel comes to a stop -
People are people.
Good. Bad. Black. White.
seabeyond
(110,159 posts)to the counselor and spoke up. so so glad. give her a hug for that, and how all of us are thrilled she has her voice. and i am glad the counselor is taking this to the principal. i have faith in the system. i hope it is resolved appropriately.
thank you for the story
let us know.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)I'm glad she did what she did too. I think considering what he said, how it made her feel, and the atmosphere of feeling like she was out of place in the classroom, might not have had a very good outcome at the time if she would have spoke out directly to him. I think going to the counselor was the right thing to do.
Thank you.
proud patriot
(100,700 posts)get her out of that class... and go directly to the school board IMO
SickOfTheOnePct
(7,290 posts)Not everything has to be run up the flag pole to the top - give the process a chance to work, and if it doesn't, then escalate.
proud patriot
(100,700 posts)you only get one childhood.
SickOfTheOnePct
(7,290 posts)And certainly doesn't take up an entire childhood. The parents will know after meeting with the principal whether or not proper steps will be taken. If they aren't, then go to the school board.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)Unfortunately it might be necessary, we will have to see in the morning. It's a science class that she may very well need in order to graduate. I'm going to give the Principal a chance to take care of it before I go to the school board.
lunasun
(21,646 posts)She should be offered some alternative to that teacher /class due to the teacher's rant
surrealAmerican
(11,339 posts)That's important. I hope she comes out of this feeling empowered to address injustice when she's confronted with it.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)She is new to the school this year, but so far she has been wonderful. The Counselor that retired, I have no doubt would have been receptive to this as well. All the teachers, the Principal and the Director are wonderful people, well except for him.
Butterbean
(1,014 posts)slampoet
(5,032 posts)I don't.
trailmonkee
(2,681 posts)Initech
(99,909 posts)I swear mass media and hate radio have been deevolving many a mind in the last 40 years.
Blue Idaho
(4,987 posts)This teacher needs to (1) apologize to their students for their incredible insensitivity and (2) find a new line of work.
skeewee08
(1,983 posts)This really makes me mad.... I am so sorry your daughter had to go through that. Please keep us posted on the out come
Cane4Dems
(305 posts)Its so sad that people like him still exist
dkf
(37,305 posts)Who thinks like that?
KamaAina
(78,249 posts)Funny how those two so often go togegther.
The life expectancy for an African American male is 69.7 years.
There are around 850,000 Black men in prison -- far too many, but a tiny fraction of the 18 million or so AA male population.
hughee99
(16,113 posts)"1 in 3 black men from 18-29 are at some point in the criminal justice process: in jail, sentencing, parole, or probation. "
It was from an ACLU report in '06
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=132&topic_id=2558287&mesg_id=2558426
The ACLU link is now dead, though, so I couldn't see the report.
Iris
(15,631 posts)There has been some effort to correct that fallacy and the post above about the 850,000 black men in prison seems to do that. (Unless there are only 2,555,000 black men living in America right now)
After re-reading, I see that Kama-Aina has include the total number of black men in America and it is far more than 2.5M
Fumesucker
(45,851 posts)Iris
(15,631 posts)"If current trends continue....."
Fumesucker
(45,851 posts)Bear in mind that Obama and Biden are both proponents of the drug war.
Iris
(15,631 posts)It's like a self-fulfilling prophecy. At the very list, it keeps them painted as potential criminals to people who don't know better.
In fact, the OP proves this. The teacher used the prediction incorrectly and in a way that does harm.
Fumesucker
(45,851 posts)If we ignore the facts I'm sure that sooner or later someone somewhere will get around to changing things for the better.
I've always wondered why Democratic politicians so dearly love to disenfranchise such a large percentage of their single most steadfastly reliable voting bloc.
Iris
(15,631 posts)is raising two sons has posted on Facebook. Her husband is an up and coming African American politician. They are not disenfranchised at all.
Fumesucker
(45,851 posts)Obama is an "up and coming AA politician" and he supports the drug war.
You know, the drug war that leads to so many African American men being disenfranchised.
What is your friend's husband's position on the drug war?
1StrongBlackMan
(31,849 posts)But had to wait for my blood to cool to a simmer.
At one point in my life, I would have advocated for this type of conduct to be met with termination ... Not so, so much now. I realize that firing this guy over this will push him farther into the darkness because, of course, it'll be all about Affirmative Action and Political Correctness; rather than, the ignorance and lunacy of his words.
So now, I'm to a point of educate him and watch him ... I'd rather know where the snakes are; rather than catch a snake and release it to the wild.
oberliner
(58,724 posts)Maybe he will learn something about himself and grow from the experience.
There might be a positive outcome all around in the end, for the teacher as well as for his current and future students.
bluestateguy
(44,173 posts)and with your example, I think we have our answer.
Liberal_in_LA
(44,397 posts)does.
Not only was the teacher racist, he planted false info in the kids' head. That black people don't list past 30. omg
matt819
(10,749 posts)This is an outrage. It's tempting to call for the teacher's immediate dismissal, but, depending on how this goes, it could be a good "teachable moment" for the teacher, the school's management, and the white kids who laughed along.
Where is this?
Keep us posted.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)I hope at the very least that it is a teachable moment. We live in Oklahoma. There hasn't been an issue with her other teachers, or Principal etc, it's just this teacher. The kids at her school all seem to be pretty good kids and to my knowledge they have never made fun of her for race. I'm not sure why they laughed, that's what is puzzling to me and her.
Dash87
(3,220 posts)Local to your state? If so, get some witnesses and then raise hell. The school will do their best to appease and bury your anger if you go to them, but nothing would be done about the teacher.
coalition_unwilling
(14,180 posts)is simply outrageous and there is no rubric of 'academic freedom' under which comments like this are permissible.
Even if the teacher in question has tenure, this comment comes right up to the line of 'moral turpitude' (one of the grounds when tenure can be revoked).
oberliner
(58,724 posts)How about waiting to see what happens in response to the complaint?
yardwork
(61,408 posts)Those sound like the kind of racist lies that are spread by white supremacist groups.
Maybe you can use the following information in your meeting with the principal tomorrow:
Table of life expectancy in the U.S. by race.
http://www.census.gov/compendia/statab/2012/tables/12s0105.pdf
A recent article, discussing how the gap in life expectancy between blacks and whites is shrinking. As of 2008, black men were expected to live to be 70.8 years old, and black women were expected to live to be 77.5 years, on average.
http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/06/05/us-usa-health-race-idUSBRE85417K20120605
Using national data including life expectancy tables from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, he and his colleagues compared how long white and black men and women were expected to live as of 2003 and 2008.
Over that time, average lifespan increased among all groups. In men, it rose from 75.3 years to 76.2 for whites and from 68.8 to 70.8 for blacks. The greater increase among black men meant that the gap shrank from a difference of 6.5 years of expected life to 5.4 years.
Life expectancy also grew from 80.3 years to 81.2 in white women and from 75.7 to 77.5 in black women - a difference of 4.6 years in 2003 compared to 3.7 years in 2008.
The racist teacher's other statement, that "one in three black men are in prison," is also demonstrably false.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incarceration_in_the_United_States
"In 2010 black non-Hispanic males were incarcerated at the rate of 4,347 inmates per 100,000 U.S. residents of the same race and gender." That is 4.3%.
It's true that the life expectancy of black people is less than that of white people, and it's true that black males are incarcerated at a higher rate than that of white males, and the reasons for that lie with racism in our society, as demonstrated by the racism of this teacher.
I'm glad that you are meeting with the principal tomorrow.
oberliner
(58,724 posts)Very generally speaking, what part of the US?
Good for your daughter for taking this to the counselor - hopefully there will be a positive outcome in the end.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)I hope something positive comes out of this as well. I hope I can keep my cool in the morning. Right now I am pretty angry!
FSogol
(45,355 posts)1. Have her keep a log of every racial or racist thing the teacher says. Include date and time.
2. Towards the end of the year or when she has enough entries, make a copy for the counselor, the principal, and any school board members, including the at large members.
3. You can't change every idiot in the world, but you can take away their power to mess with you.
HTH.
Chellee
(2,086 posts)I hope she knows she did exactly the right things every step of the way. You've done a really good job raising her that she handled such an infuriating, upsetting situation so well.
I really hope it just seemed like ALL the other kids laughed. And hopefully some of them laughed out of confusion over what to do, but if not, that's also a little troubling.
Not as much as the teacher, obviously, who's in a position of authority and is making this all seem "acceptable behavior" to the kids in class.
Good luck tomorrow. Personally, I hope he's fired and the kids all get counseling. There's no place for this.
L0oniX
(31,493 posts)riverbendviewgal
(4,251 posts)and if anyone said boy, you're old , I would laugh...I always say yeah, I am shocked when I look in the mirror. and also say I consider myself lucky to be this old. My younger son died at 26 years old and his dad died at 54, 18 months apart. They were diagnosed with cancer two months apart.
Being old has its advantages. I feel sorry for people who try to hide their age.
That teacher needs an assessment. He needs to be removed from his classroom.
NOLALady
(4,003 posts)would say, "if you don't like being old, there's always the alternative".
I consider myself lucky to have made it to 65 also. My Mother didn't get past 23.
Anyone who has a problem with being old, can always consider the alternative. Die Young!
riverbendviewgal
(4,251 posts)JohnnyRingo
(18,580 posts)...He's young enough to find another job.
I imagine there will be a new teacher next week.
avebury
(10,946 posts)I hope you will come back and let us know the outcome of your meeting tomorrow. The teacher owes her a public apology and needs to attend a cultural awareness class and sensitivity training.
treestar
(82,383 posts)It was a Catholic School even. If this is a public school he's toast unless you live in Red Hell maybe.
The one I know said something like she wished her kids had the benefits of affirmative action and she tells this to a class of black 8th graders.
Cha
(295,899 posts)What the hell!
I'm so sorry your daughter had to go though this, SunsetDreams. It Boggles the mind how teachers can say things like this in this era of our time.
DonRedwood
(4,359 posts)As a teacher I am horrified that this happened. I hope that there are teachers there that will go out of their way to make a healthy balanced place for your daughter. I hope as word of what happened spreads, those teachers will step up and hopefully make things better.
My best to your daughter.
donqpublic
(155 posts)He needs to find another line of work if he cannot find an appropriate response to a common comment directed at most teachers. Only a coward attempts to raise himself up by pushing someone down. I see a short future as a Romney speech writer for this person.
nikto
(3,284 posts)If he's a Republican, then no problem.
No harm done. It's OK.
IOKIYAR---It's The Rule Of The Land.
Ilsa
(61,675 posts)Please hug your sweet daughter for me. Tell her it's from an old white woman who thinks she's precious just the way she is.
barbtries
(28,702 posts)i hope he loses his job.
JohnnyLib2
(11,206 posts)No doubt there will be a mixed reaction (especially to your daughter), but I'm betting the family will stand tall and win some hearts and minds.....
Nevernose
(13,081 posts)I'm not calling you or your daughter a liar, but I know that I'm a teacher of 11th & 12th graders and my own daughter is a junior, and that sometimes a student's perception (or a teacher's for that matter) isn't always reality.
I only ask because I had the same conversation -- not the life expectancy part, but the inherent racism in the American judicial system -- just Friday, and I can see how a student maybe not paying 100% attention, or me talking way too fast, and maybe misinterpreting that.
From what your OP repeated, it sounds like the guy is an asshole, but maybe he just was just unclear? Maybe there's a perfectly reasonable, nonracist explanation?
adigal
(7,581 posts)SomeTimes I will use sarcasm to make a point, or hyperbole, and if a student is half-listening, they can get it all wrong. Everyone here is ready to hang the teacher, and no one has heard his side. God, I thought Dems liked teachers. Seems like you are all ready to believe the worst from a half a story you got here.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)It has everything to do with him being a bad apple. There are bad apples, I'm not "ready to hang" all teachers. I'm not even ready to "hang him". When stuff like this happens it needs to be called out, there needs to be a teachable moment come out of all of this.
adigal
(7,581 posts)You didn't hear tone, see facial expressions. It might have been the teacher giving an example of what a bad day really looks like in America and a sensitive young person misread it. It happens all of the time with teens. They often misread cues, and tone, it's part of the age group. Think about teens you know and whether or not they read their parent's tone in warnings correctly?
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)well I probably should leave it at that. I will say this I trust my daughters judgement on what was said. I trust that she knows her own feelings, and I trust that she was paying attention to what was said in class. I also respect the fact that you are a teacher and you may have some insight as to what goes on in your classroom between you and your students, but you do not know my daughter, and you do not know THIS teacher. I know both of them. I do not have a beef with teachers, just this one.
WinkyDink
(51,311 posts)and you think THE ONLY BLACK STUDENT WAS TOO "SENSITIVE"?
WinkyDink
(51,311 posts)SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)The class is science and they are studying circuits. They were taking apart and old phone of his, and they were making fun of how old the phone was. One of the kids said well that's because (insert teacher name) is old. That's when he went off on the rant. That conversation or statements have nothing to do with studying circuits or what was being taught in the classroom.
adigal
(7,581 posts)If I said something like he said, my students would know that Mrs. adigal is ranting for social justice and equality again. They would know it wasn't racist at all. What is this teacher's history? Does he have a history of being racist or aggressive? Any racial conflict in his life to bring this up? I would just give him the benefit of the doubt until you talk to him, and then you can tell his intent.
Best,
WinkyDink
(51,311 posts)NOLALady
(4,003 posts)"that she has always felt like he didn't like her, and now she knows why."
I'm sure this was not in isolation. There had to be a reason she felt he did not like her. Evidently, she knew his intent.
d_r
(6,907 posts)adigal
(7,581 posts)Otherwise, I can't imagine what he meant. But don't prejudge; I can see someone saying that and meaning that no matter how bad and old he is, many people have it worse. Find out what he meant before biting his head off. Teachers are human, you know. Sometimes we mean something and it comes out horribly!
WinkyDink
(51,311 posts)mrs_p
(3,012 posts)Jennicut
(25,415 posts)To high school kids, 25 is old. Being an adult, one needs to handle things like one. And the racist comment is disgusting. I work as a sub in elementary schools and the kids really think that I, being 30 something is really old (let alone the teachers in their 50's and 60's). I think it is funny. It is not meant to be cruel. This guy needs to not work with teenagers and needs a lesson in how to treat people of other races. Sick.
blaze
(6,268 posts)I'm SO sorry you and your daughter are having to deal with this. (What year is it?)
And very impressed that your daughter went straight to the counselor and with the reaction of the counselor.
I am holding out hope that good can come from this.
Honeycombe8
(37,648 posts)some reason he would say such a thing. But I can't.
How awful for your daughter. I wish one of the other students had said something in response,,,like, hey, wait a minute, teach. But I can understand why they didn't.
I hope your daughter gets past this and accepts his apology (which is no doubt coming). What possessed him to go off in that direction? And then not to catch himself, when he realized what he had said? The fact that your daughter was there shouldn't have changed his apologetic reaction, after realizing what he had said.
I don't supposed there's any chance of getting out of his class?
knitter4democracy
(14,350 posts)I also freely admit that I'm fat, a nerd, single, and often wear weird clothes. No biggie.
I'm really hoping the teacher said something that was misinterpreted, but if not, then the district needs to throw the book at him. Totally uncalled for comments if true.
AverageJoe90
(10,745 posts)It's a lot worse in some place than others......
Anyway, so sorry this happened to you guys. Hope this gets resolved in your favor.
roody
(10,849 posts)lessons on our racist, incarceration nation. I see this is a science class.
pacalo
(24,721 posts)& that you're going to talk to the principal tomorrow. You both did the right thing. That jerk deserves to be yanked from the classroom.
iemitsu
(3,888 posts)i'm sorry that your daughter had to experience this, anywhere but especially in school.
she was right to leave the class and go to the counselor. i hope the principal will be supportive of your daughter and insists that all students (and people) in the building treat each other with respect.
i am surprised that an "old man" in his thirties (not old to me) would be such an ass.
why would a man who would say such bigoted things to students want to teach? he lacks the necessary nurturing skills.
good luck in the morning. you should consider what you think would be an appropriate course to pursue.
the teacher should, of course apologize to your daughter in front of the whole class but i doubt the principal will require that. i'm sure he will be expected to apologize in private.
if there is another teacher who is teaching the same course you might have your daughter's schedule changed. but that may not be the best course. i don't know the situation and you probably need your daughters input. will her life at school be worse if it seems the teacher drove her away? how large is the student body? there are other questions that you should think about before deciding what you might suggest.
again, good luck to you and your family.
Catherine Vincent
(34,485 posts)A disrespecting student says he's old and he lashes out at black men? He's either a prejudiced ahole or his girlfriend dumped him for a black guy or something.
CoffeeCat
(24,411 posts)...who went straight to the counselor. That teacher is a bigoted buffoon and your daughter had the good sense to inform the school about his comments.
Those comments really were deplorable.
You raised a young woman who is not afraid to hold people accountable when they act in an unjust manner. Congrats to you--and to your smart daughter!
lindysalsagal
(20,433 posts)I hope this guy gets tossed.
HappyMe
(20,277 posts)I can't even to begin to understand why this ass responded the way he did.
What an awesome thing to be teaching the kids.
Catherine Vincent
(34,485 posts)Wouldn't it be awesome if this morning you find out a few other students contacted the counselor? It would be great if others thought it was wrong and would like the teacher to be reprimanded. Also, very sorry your daughter had to endure that bitter teacher.
SunsetDreams
(8,571 posts)We had our meeting and my husband also came. First we started with the counselor, and then the Principal came in. The Principal asked if we would feel comfortable having the teacher come in as well, apparently according to her, he felt bad about the situation. We said that we wanted to talk to just her and the counselor first. The Principal related to us that he was not the type of teacher that she had known throughout the years to make an intentional comment like that.
She said that he told her that in his Philosophy class which was 1st hour, they had talked about this "new study" that came out which involved life expectancy of black people and prison rates. He said that there were a couple of students in the Circuits class who had also been in his first hour Philosophy class. He claimed to the Principal that THOSE students brought up the study.
My daughter spoke up and said that is not true, that's a lie. He is the one that said it, no other student brought that up. She then told the Principal that she felt like she was believing the teacher over her. She said if you don't believe me, ask your daughter she was in the class with me. Needless to say, both the Counselor and the Principal apologized and said that they hoped in talking with both my daughter and the teacher that something positive could come out of this, maybe a broader discussion. I'm not comfortable with his "lie" though, why try to blame the students for bringing it up, if you are sincere?
I'm not sure what's going to happen. The Teacher never was brought into the room. When we came out, he was no where around, even though he supposedly felt so bad that he wanted to talk to us all and make it right. His presence was never offered up again after that initial offer. They did ask her if she wanted to set up a meeting with the Principal, Counselor, Teacher and her, and she said that would be ok she guessed. She also said that she wanted to drop his class, and they said they would look into it, to see if it was even possible considering it was 4 weeks into the Trimester. I still can't believe he blamed the students who were in the earlier class of bringing that up again. I think he is just trying to put it back in the box wrapped in neat little bow, so that it takes the heat off of him at having not explained what he was talking about, if he truly was talking about a study or something that occurred earlier in the day. My daughter wasn't a part of the 1st hour class and from her standpoint it came out of nowhere. It was not mentioned that it was a study.
Maybe there will be another update when my daughter gets out of school. We will see, I do know I'm not comfortable with cowardly blaming it on the students for bringing it up. I'm hoping that once the Principal talks to her daughter about what happened, then it will exonerate my daughters claim of what happened. If it was a study and a conversation that happened earlier, the teacher should have explained that, and not just came out of nowhere with it, out of context, for students who were not present for the earlier conversation.
We will see. Thank you all for lending me your ear so to speak. I really appreciate having the opportunity to vent about this.
barbtries
(28,702 posts)your daughter is a courageous young woman and no matter what happens from here you and your husband should be so proud.
Catherine Vincent
(34,485 posts)I doubt he feels bad about it for your daughter. He just feels bad because he was called on it. Maybe next time he'll keep topics like that in the appropriate class. I'm sure his prejudices shows in that philosophy class.
Butterbean
(1,014 posts)lindysalsagal
(20,433 posts)from now on. That includes all teachers in all buildings. Whether he learns compassion, is totally up to speculation. But the school doesn't want to over-react or underreact, and it's really really hard to be sure you're on that sweet spot. I'm sure they're spending alot of time in meetings making sure they're at least close.
It's easy when you talk all day to say something that doesn't sound good out of context, and it's also easy for students to hear what you say differently than how you meant it. But the truth remains that there are bigots in every profession, and if there are few minorities in your school, you may have just unearthed one.
I'd say the real proof of this teacher's intentions comes from looking at him as a whole, not just in one moment. If he's nasty and disdainful regularly, then he's probably exactly as your daughter reported him.
I don't blame her for wanting to change classes and they should absolutely let her do that, never mind how far they are into the semester. You have a right to demand that as a parent. Tell the principal and if it isn't changed, tell him/her you'll be speaking with the superintendent about it, and even hire a lawyer if necessary. She should not remain in that class if she doesn't want to.
I also think the school should have a school-wide character education campaign about acceptance and multiculturalism, clearly establishing the school's values for all. I don't mean a one-time viewing of a film, but an on-going, student-developed set of lesson plans and activities, with prominently displayed art and banners to that effect.
You should be able to see how the school is directly confronting the possibility that some students feel less than welcome in their school, and that they're dedicated to making sure that stops, now.
I'm sorry your school failed your daughter.
Tsiyu
(18,186 posts)seabeyond
(110,159 posts)something a teacher would do to not own his behavior.
Lilyeye
(1,417 posts)I see people in this thread trying to excuse this jerk, but clearly there is really no excuse for him. Esp since he tried to blame the students for his comment.
undergroundpanther
(11,925 posts)octothorpe
(962 posts)What kind of class was it?
LiberalAndProud
(12,799 posts)Tears come to my eyes when I think of how deeply your daughter was hurt. Certainly, intent matters too, but the immediate consequence is the first sign that something bad happened, purposefully or not. I hope the teacher was simply speaking from his own preoccupation with the study that he was talking around, and not willful racism. That he was insensitive is evident.
The teacher is aware that he did damage. I will wait to read if and how he tries to make amends. I wish comfort for your daughter and for you.
JDPriestly
(57,936 posts)But it also isn't OK to make derogatory comments about older people in the classroom.
30 is still very young. But I remember being the only over 50 person in workplaces and having to endure ugly ridicule of older people.
Use this situation to teach your child not only that she deserves to be respected but also that her teacher and older people deserve to be respected even if they seem old. Everyone will gain if she learns to understand how it feels to be picked on for something you cannot change.
If this situation is handled correctly, your daughter will be the wiser and better for it. Probably good to go to the school administration. This is not a trivial incident.
NOLALady
(4,003 posts)should be had with the student who made the comment about the teacher.
JDPriestly
(57,936 posts)WinkyDink
(51,311 posts)get the red out
(13,458 posts)How does someone, and educated person at that, not know that what he said was incredibly wrong and even EVIL?
I think that racism has been made disgustingly acceptable to so many on the right by the right wing media that it just comes flying out, people are so indoctrinated in that wretchedness that they can't contain it all the time. It's destroying our country.
cindyperry2010
(846 posts)people can not or refuse to move past difference and realise we are all from the family of human being and be afforded that respect. i am sorry your daughter had to face that
Ken Burch
(50,254 posts)That teacher should be punished to the fullest extent possible...not sure if that's a firing offense, but it sure as hell should be.
SHAME on the other kids in the class for all going along with the teacher's "joke". And on their parents for teaching them to be ok with things like that.
Lilyeye
(1,417 posts)I guess we know what type of people are raising them.