Dating in a politically polarized world

[brooklynite]

Axios

Political polarization in the Trump era is finding new ways to seep into our personal lives.

The big picture: Romance seekers see a heightened value in knowing their potential suitors' political affiliations. Major dating platforms including OkCupid, Hinge and Bumble have introduced filters to sift out matches with “incompatible” politics.

Why it matters: OkCupid Chief Marketing Officer Melissa Hobley says the filters help daters efficiently find partners with similar values.

"If you care deeply about reproductive rights, for example, then you should not be matched with people that believe the opposite," Hobley said. "And call that a bubble, but I actually call that respecting and creating technology that supports that view."

"It's so great that we have gone from messaging based on a photo to, 'Wow, you're into Warren, I'm into Bernie — let's debate that over a margarita,'" she added.

[MyOwnPeace]

1. Met a lady for the first time for drinks........

She couldn't wait to show me a pic of her "Trumpy Bear!"

"Waiter, check please.........."

[AJT]

3. I can't imagine....

I've never done any online dating, but being a 62 year old female, I'm guessing the pickings would be slim. I would probably get some trumpie guy wearing all the creepy 45 paraphernalia available.

[lark]

2. OMG, so glad I'm not dating.

I think I'd probably have to move because most people my age, especially the men around here, are Repugs and I would not date them for one second after I learned the truth. My forever man is a Democrat and I wouldn't have it any other way.

[ariadne0614]

4. Dating apps report a vast majority of Democrats.

That’s according to Thom Hartmann on today’s Stephanie Miller show. Apparently, the MAGATs have their own dating sites.

[Caliman73]

5. Knowing your potential partner's politics is important.

Politics, since the Nixon era, have been based on values rather than policy. Especially through the Reagan Era the emphasis on values has been heavily a part of conservative messaging even if it is all bullshit.

For Liberals/Progressives, it is important that the government's powers be used to protect and help uplift the most vulnerable while balancing individual liberties. For Conservatives order and hierarchy are most important regardless of who gets hurt.

I know that the last two sentences above are simplistic, but they are at the core of the difference between the two political sides.

I was watching a clip from an interview with Robert Reich, and he said something that I both agree with and fundamentally disagree with. He said something to the effect of, "when you take out the racism, basically Republicans and Democrats want the same things" Now I agree that people basically want similar things like, economic security, a chance at a better life for their children, a well paying job, chance for upward advancement, free time to do preferred activities, security from violence, etc... Those are human values.

What I fundamentally disagree with Reich on is YOU CAN'T TAKE OUT THE RACISM, nor the sexism, nor the homophobia. While not all Republicans/Conservatives are racist, sexist, or phobic, they subscribe to an ideology that relies on a hierarchy of those who are "worthy of power and protection and those who are not." That ideology allows for racism, sexism, ect... to be espoused or at least tolerated.

We are all prone to bias, but the fundamental difference between conservatives and liberals is that liberals are open to new ideas and experiences that challenge their world view, and will change their mind with sufficient evidence, while conservatives will hold on to what they consider "traditional" values despite that they are not supported by evidence and may even be harmful.

That is not a minor thing. I think that a lot of couples may be able to compartmentalize policy differences, which were the thing before the whole conservative media came about, but as conservatism has turned much more hard line in the past 40 years and are now on full display with Trump's brand of fascist populism, we are seeing fundamental differences.

You can't support Trump and not be aware that children are being held in cages for the purpose of punishing asylum seekers and scaring off potential immigrants. You cannot, support Trump and not see that he is proposing cutting the social safety net while enacting spending and tax cuts that will benefit the wealthiest among us. I mean, you can blind yourself to that intentionally, but then what does that say about who you are? Would any liberal/progressive be able to set that aside in a partner?