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Wed Sep 11, 2019, 05:00 PM

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-11: This Is The Story Of A Hurricane Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-11: This Is The Story Of A Hurricane Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! What’s up Michigan State? How you guys doing? You fucking good? We are back everybody! We are baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!! Wooooooooooooooooo!!! And I appreciate you guys fitting in our bullshit in between your busy class schedules. So let me check – is @realDonaldTrump still our president currently? What? He’s attacking Chrissy Tiegan and John Legend? Sigh… really there is nothing that will please this guy. I want to start by talking about some football this week. Whew! Man it was a batshit crazy week for teams not named the New England Patriots. Yeah, even then we still boo them because, why not! But we can all laugh at the Browns right? Holy shit that might be the single biggest epic fail that has ever failed. I mean not even last week every sports pundit in the country was pegging the Browns as a Super Bowl contender. But then not only do you lose… you lose that badly to a last place AFC South team? Yeah. And then there’s the Miami Dolphins. I don’t use this phrase enough, but the phrase “dumpster fire” most certainly applies here. I mean not only do you lose to the Ravens by 49 points, you have half the team threatening to be traded. Seriously, as much as we hate them, just give it to New England already. What’s the point of this season? Well, plenty and we will be monitoring the season as it is going on. But really, I am an Angels fan and I thought my team was a dumpster fire, but we ain’t got nothing on Miami! OK enough of the intro, we got a lot of idiocy to get to. But first John Oliver is back and he delves into another dumpster fire of an organization – the United States Senate.

Whew, where do we begin this week? As always, whenever we take an extended break we like to play Catch Up On Stuff We Missed (1) which includes the Straight Pride Parade in Boston, Trump being an armchair weather warrior, and more! In the second slot this week, we’re going across the pond to Merry Old England, where prime minister Boris Johnson (2) is seeing his fellow Torries jump ship after finding out how toxic his Brexit plan really is – and really it’s a failed experiment at this point already. In the number 3 slot this week – is of course the guy who we currently call president, Donald Trump (3), and I couldn’t love his stubborn assholishness surrounding Hurricane Dorian more, and his insistence that he was right about it hitting Alabama, but no, not really. In slot number 4 is the Alt Right (4) and they have been getting arrested and losing trials – from Alex Jones getting banned on Youtube to Milo Yiannopolous going for broke, we got it covered! For the 5th slot this week – we have a new edition of our weekly investigative piece, Top 10 Investigates, and this week we’re sending our journalism team to cover the controversial remodel of Michigan's controversial Fruitport High School which would “make it harder for mass shooters”. Because banning guns is so much easier. In the number 6 slot this week, is of course our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” – and really, why are Christians so crazy? Our resident pastor is going to take a look at some of the crazy stories coming out of the religious right lately. At slot number 7, we have a new edition of “Beating A Dead Horse” – and we need to break out the world’s tiniest violin to play a sad song for Moscow Mitch – he’s complaining that his nickname is discrimination, but really… go blow it out your ass and do you r job, Mitch! Taking the number 8 slot this week, sorry, we got to play devil’s advocate here with a new edition of “NO!!!”. Is Will & Grace star Debra Messing’s controversial plan to blacklist Hollywood Trump supporters in a new era of McCarthyism what we really need right now? NO! In the number 9 (NEIN!!!!) slot this week we are going to partake some cocktails in “I Need A Drink” and this week – fried chicken sandwiches are all the rage, and enraging people due to their lack of availability! So we are going to get drunk and find out why! Finally this week our handy 2020 voter’s guide “Keeping Up With The Candidates” is going to examine the latest casualties of the insanity surrounding the 2020 election – Kristen Gillibrand and Jay Inslee! And to top it off, we’ve got some live music from Australia’s King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard, they have a pair of albums out now and both are amazing! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Catch Up On Stuff We Missed
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We had to take an unexpected break the last couple of weeks when our Syracuse show got cancelled, and also the Labor Day holiday. And in the world where Donald J. Trump is currently at the helm, 2 weeks can feel like an absolute eternity. Which means that we missed a hell of a lot of stuff including the latest mass shooting in Odessa, Texas. And something that I have been very much looking forward to discussing – the Straight Pride Parade in Boston. If you were expecting the SPP to be a category 5 shit storm, you weren’t too far off. The real shit storm is coming. Because the scene at the SPP was so out of control that there were arrests from the people protesting the event. But one of my favorite comments came from Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Really, what did you expect?

Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-N.Y.) on Saturday called out participants in Boston's "Straight Pride Parade," saying it should have been called the "I-Struggle-With-Masculinity" parade.

"For men who are allegedly so 'proud' of being straight, they seem to show real incompetence at attracting women to their event," Ocasio-Cortez said in a tweet accompanied by a video showing marchers. "Seems more like a 'I-Struggle-With-Masculinity' parade to me."

"Hope they grow enough over the next year to support / join LGBTQ fam next #Pride," the freshman lawmaker added.

In a subsequent tweet, she asked for contributions to a bail fund for "activists who put themselves on the line protecting the Boston community."

The Straight Pride Parade was reportedly organized by a group of three men as a way to respond to the festivities that coincided with LGBT Pride Month in June. The Saturday parade drew a massive contingent of counterprotesters and a heavy police presence, according to reports.

The video Ocasio-Cortez linked to showed mostly men walking along the street waving American flags and holding signs that said "Make normalcy normal again."

I mean seriously, AOC, did you not get the pamphlet before hand? It’s the Straight Pride Parade – it’s the showcase for boorish white male snowflakes who are offended by everything. And then there was this thing, I don’t know about you but I think that the SPP organizers could take a page from the Queer Eye guys and use some decorating tips:

Oh that’s not at all shocking. At least they spelled it correctly so I guess that counts? And don’t worry – we’re saving the hurricane and Sharpie gate for entry #3 this week. And then as far as the Straight Pride Parade goes and I could talk about the colossal shit show that was all week. But there was some great news on the gun front – Wal-Mart has had enough of mass shooters and gun nuts targeting their stores, so what happened?

Supermarket and pharmacy chains across the U.S. have begun asking customers to not openly carry firearms in their stores, including in states where open carry is legal. It’s a trend that appears to have been sparked by Walmart, whose CEO Doug McMillon announced the decision on Tuesday following a string of mass shootings around the country — including the Aug. 3 shooting in which 22 were killed at a Walmart store in El Paso, Tex.

McMillon announced on Tuesday that Walmart would stop selling handguns and military-style rifles. In the same statement, he requested that customers no longer openly carry firearms into Walmart stores. Several other chains have followed suit. As of Friday, Kroger, CVS, Walgreens and Wegmans had all issued similar statements of their own.

Given the potential ambiguity of their language — that the chains are “requesting” customers leave guns at home, and “prefer” not to see weapons carried — the statements bring into question exactly how store employees will go about enforcing their new guidelines. “Asking customers not to openly carry firearms in stores isn’t exactly a policy,” says David Yamane, a sociologist at Wake Forest University and expert in American gun culture and policy. “You haven’t prohibited [it] from happening.”

So to extrapolate this – while this is a victory in the world of gun activism – some guns good, other guns… eh, we’ll leave you to your own devices. But this is the kind of horror that the NRA has wrought – that they might not actually be able to ban guns. Now, speaking of home grown terrorists, Trump attempted to setup a meeting with Taliban leaders on the 19th anniversary of 9/11. Yeah that would be like celebrating at an open bar on the 19th anniversary of your sobriety. Just don’t do it!

President Trump says peace talks with the Taliban are "dead," after he called off a meeting with the Taliban and Afghan government leaders that was supposed to take place at Camp David over the weekend.

"They're dead, they're dead. As far as I'm concerned, they are dead," Mr. Trump told reporters on the White House South Lawn Monday.

Critics chastised the president after he announced a meeting with the Taliban and Afghan leaders scheduled for Camp David was called off — but it was the fact that a meeting with the Taliban had been scheduled at Camp David just days before the anniversary of the 2001 terrorist attacks many found shocking. The president reiterated to reporters on the White House South Lawn Monday that it was his plan to hold the secret talks, and his plan to cancel them.

The president said he called off the talks because the Taliban had killed a U.S. soldier and others a few days before the planned meeting.

"You can't do that. You can't do that with me," the president told reporters.

And the final thing that I wanted to touch on in catching up on stuff we missed – remember hedge fund douchebag Jacob Wohl? Yeah the guy running the world’s worst intelligence agency is back in the news for – wait for it – selling fraudulent securities! I mean could this guy be anymore of a low life criminal scumbag? It’s not possible to sink lower than these guys do on a daily basis. Almost kind of like Barney on the Simpsons.

Conservative operative Jacob Wohl is wanted on a felony arrest warrant in California, a development that could hamper his spree of bizarre, blundering political schemes.

Wohl and former business partner Matthew Johnson were both charged with the unlawful sale of securities in a Riverside Superior Court criminal complaint filed on Aug. 19.

Wohl has not been arrested yet on the charge, according to the court docket. Prosecutors recommended $5,000 bonds for both Wohl and Johnson.

The allegation that Wohl and Johnson unlawfully sold securities centers on one of Wohl’s financial companies, Montgomery Assets. A warrant application filed by the Riverside County District Attorney’s Office notes that the three-year statute of limitations on the case was set to expire at the end of August 2019, meaning prosecutors had to file by the end of last month if they wanted to pursue charges.

Exclusive from the Daily Beast: https://www.thedailybeast.com/jacob-wohl-wanted-on-felony-arrest-warrant?ref=author

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[font size="8"]Boris Johnson
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Meanwhile, in London!!! Yes, we’re going across the pond to merry old England because I can’t get enough of how much an absolute loser Trump’s doppleganger, Boris Johnson is. So Brexit has taken a turn for hopefully the worst, and it couldn’t happen to a more deserving asshole. We’ve discussed Brexit on this program tons of times. But in what might be the worst episode of Deal Or No Deal ever, Boris Johnson is absolutely insistent that he could indeed shut down Parliament until he delivers a No Deal Brexit. The implications of which could an economic nightmare. Worse, it could usher in a second Great Depression, the likes of which would be unrecoverable. So what’s he up to this week?

Boris Johnson has retreated from threats to break the law in order to force through Brexit in October, indicating to senior colleagues that he would accept a three-month delay if it was forced on him by the courts.

In private conversations with colleagues, Johnson has assured senior colleagues that he will "abide by the law," according to the Times.

Downing Street's initial threats simply to break the law and refuse to seek an extension now appear to have vanished, with senior cabinet ministers including Robert Buckland, the justice secretary, and Nicky Morgan, the culture secretary, thought to be ready to resign if Johnson did refuse to uphold the rule of law.

Buckland was compelled to intervene publicly and say he had reminded Johnson of his obligations not to act illegally.

"I fully support the Prime Minister and will continue to serve in his Cabinet," Buckland tweeted.

But there’s nothing about Brexit that’s been law abiding! It’s the opposite of what a law and order society would be. What’s happening in England is really happening all over the world. Same shit, different country. Since the Brexit vote, the UK has been an absolute dumpster fire of an organization – they’ve gone through PMs at about the same rate that people go through shoes. So could Boris Johnson last? Probably not.

Prime Minister Boris Johnson insisted Monday a new Brexit deal could be reached to ensure Britain would leave the European Union by the Oct. 31 deadline, as he acknowledged that withdrawing without one would be a “failure” for which he’d be partially to blame.

Irish Prime Minister Leo Varadkar warned Johnson that “there’s no such thing as a clean break,” and if Britain crashed out, it would “cause severe disruption for British and Irish people alike.”

The two leaders met in Dublin as a showdown between the British government and lawmakers was reaching a climax in London. An opposition-backed measure designed to rule out a no-deal Brexit on Oct. 31 became law after receiving the formal assent of Queen Elizabeth II, hours before legislators were set to reject Johnson’s demand for a snap election to break the political deadlock engulfing the government.

Later Monday, the government is due to suspend Parliament for five weeks to try to curb rebellious lawmakers who have played havoc with Johnson’s Brexit plans.

Yeah it sounds about right – Brexit is a flaming pile of garbage and that’s going to impact not just England but the entire world could be affected because of this. There’s so much secrecy and hoopla surrounding this shit show that it may be impossible to unravel. And in fact there’s more to this than you might think. There’s actually some secret legislation that Parliament is trying to get out in the open that could show the true impact of a hard Brexit. Which might explain why Boris is trying to suspend Parliament.

The United Kingdom could face food, medicine, and fuel shortages when it splits from the European Union on October 31, according to a government report leaked to British newspaper The Sunday Times.

The report, entitled "Operation Yellowhammer," outlines a laundry list of ways life on the British Isles could be disrupted if politicians can't reach a trade deal with the EU in the next 11 weeks. The yellowhammer is a small bird that is on track for extinction.

According to one BBC report, the document was leaked to the press by a former government minister hoping to influence negotiations with the EU.

Starting on November 1, trade with Britain's neighbors could slow to a trickle as Britain's main route into Europe gets blocked.

"On Day 1 of No Deal, 50%-85% of [trucks] travelling via the short straits may not be ready for French customs," according to the report, which would cause them to be turned back at the French border. It goes on to add that: "The worst disruption to the short Channel crossings might last 3 months before flow rates rise to about 50%-70%."

Yeah so there are some serious risks. This is nothing to joke about. Oh and in case you’re wondering who is actually still supporting this, well, prepare to put on your shocked face. Because it’s the same crap no matter where you go. And when the Nazi party – you see where I’m going with this, makes a reappearance, you know things are fucked up.

The leader of Change UK, Anna Soubry MP, says she had to cancel a speech at a pro-EU rally because she was too intimidated by far-right protesters. Ms Soubry claims a ‘large group of protesters’ with ‘yellow vests and the EDL’ had gathered, as pro-EU demonstrators began their protest and speeches. Ms Soubry was due to speak alongside Peter Tatchell as well as the co-leader of the Green party, Sian Berry, where she was expected to repeat her calls for a ‘people’s vote’ to break the Brexit deadlock. She says that a group of people went on to ‘give Nazi salutes’ and ‘sing in praise of Boris Johnson’, LBC reported. It is estimated that around 200 people joined a pro-Brexit rally which was organised by the Democratic Football Lads Alliance (DFLA) that took place on Saturday at Parliament square.

Read more: https://metro.co.uk/2019/09/08/anna-soubry-saw-nazi-salutes-pro-brexit-rally-cancelled-speech-10706642/?ito=cbshare

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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This is the story of a hurricane… well, this is the story of Donald Trump and his stubbornness with a hurricane that is currently ravaging the Caribbean and the Bahamas in particular. While we won’t make fun of the hurricane, we will make fun of Donald Trump and his use of a sharpie to illustrate the point he was trying to make about the hurricane hitting Alabama. Which in no way was true. But when he’s already in a hole, he’s attempting to dig himself further into a hole with his Alabama situation.

When Brad Parscale, Donald Trump’s campaign manager, started peddling a Trump-branded Sharpie pen on Friday morning, things for a moment seemed to be returning to what passes for normal now: The frenzied commander in chief was finally steering away from a desperately earnest fight against admitting he inaccurately warned of Hurricane Dorian’s threat to Alabama and back toward a favorite pastime: trolling. Unfortunately, the message—that this branded pen “has the special ability to drive @CNN and the rest of the fake news crazy!”—came much too late. The key to trolling is jeering indifference: You win because you don’t care. To a troll, caring is hilarious and (should you make the mistake of doing it) fatal.

By that metric alone, Trump cannot be said to have won the week. During this astonishing #Sharpiegate news cycle—a throbbing tumor attached to the real news of a Bahamas devastated by the storm—Trump, who typically lies with fluency and ease, cared so deeply about being fact-checked on this particular matter that his handlers warned the press he’d keep it going as long as they did. Trouble was, Trump cared much more than the press did. Maybe pathologically. He spent the better part of a week doubling down like a hangry gambler on this single claim, sharing old maps of obsolete weather forecasts to find something that would make him right—while Alabama went unaffected and the Bahamas mourned and the Carolinas battened down. He persisted until almost everyone ended up mystified and astounded, shaking their heads the way one does when someone has well and truly lost it.

Yeah so we had a lot of fun collecting memes and videos with the sharpie as you can plainly see on the monitors behind me and we’ll post a couple of the best ones through this entry. But what motivated this bizarre display? Was it political? Was it just Trump’s massive ego on display thinking that he was right and everyone else is wrong? Or was it a cat?

Seriously is he just punking us at this point? Is this the cat game from Super Troopers? Not so funny meow is it? Well getting back on topic – what caused this?

The chief scientist of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) said he is looking into "potential violations" of scientific integrity in the way the agency responded to President Trump's claims that Hurricane Dorian posed a threat to Alabama. Craig McLean, NOAA's acting chief scientist, wrote an email to colleagues that said the agency's statement Friday backing up Mr. Trump's claims was "political" and a "danger to public health and safety."

"I am pursuing the potential violations of our NOAA Administrative Order on Scientific Integrity," McLean wrote in the email, which was obtained by CBS News. The letter was first reported by the Washington Post.

At the White House last week, Mr. Trump held up a NOAA map that appeared to have been altered with a black pen to show a projection of the storm possibly striking Alabama. On Friday, NOAA backed up the president's ongoing assertions that the state appeared initially to be in the path of the hurricane — contradicting the findings of the agency's own meteorologists.

"From Wednesday, August 28, through Monday, September 2, the information provided by NOAA and the National Hurricane Center to President Trump and the wider public demonstrated that tropical-storm-force winds from Hurricane Dorian could impact Alabama," a NOAA spokesman said in a statement Friday.

That’s straight from the NOAA chief himself! I mean here’s why having a president who shoots his mouth off daily at social media is a bad idea – he could potentially be committing a whole lot of crimes and a whole lot of national and international law violations. Really this is one case where Donny needs a good dose of “shut the fuck up”.

In the week since President Trump asserted incorrectly that Alabama was likely to get hit "much) harder than anticipated" by Hurricane Dorian, he has fired off many tweets insisting he was technically correct, doctored a weather map with a Sharpie, got his homeland security adviser to back him up, and earned an odd unsigned statement from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration saying the National Weather Service's Birmingham office had been wrong to correct him.

A story that could have died discreetly with one admission of error has now prompted several investigations focused on NOAA's statement. The inspector general of the Commerce Department, which includes NOAA, is looking into whether NOAA compromised the NWS's "standards of scientific integrity," endangering its "ability to communicate accurate and timely weather warnings and data to the nation in times of national emergency," according to documents reviewed by The New York Times.

NOAA's acting chief scientist, Craig McClean, also informed staff in an email Sunday that he is "pursuing the potential violations of our NOAA Administrative Order on Scientific Integrity," explaining: "My understanding is that this intervention to contradict the forecaster was not based on science but on external factors including reputation and appearance, or simply put, political." The New York Times reported Monday that Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross had threatened to fire NOAA's acting director and other top political appointees if they didn't bolster Trump's incorrect claim; Commerce denied the firing threat but not that Ross ordered NOAA to back Trump.

So even the NOAA admits that this was a partisan hit job. But here’s where it gets weird. Because this si the Trump administration – so why wouldn’t it get weird? Not only is Trump insisting that he’s right on this, he’s sending Ivanka to the supposed “affected area” to confirm that he’s right. I mean shit, 25th amendment already and end this madness!

President Donald Trump's daughter/adviser Ivanka Trump has reignited the furor around her father's "Sharpiegate" snafu after announcing plans to visit Alabama, the state her father erroneously claimed was likely to be hit by Hurricane Dorian.

A week ago, the president had warned that Alabama, along with the Carolinas and Georgia, was "most likely to be hit harder than anticipated."

The National Weather Service (NWS) in Birmingham, Alabama, was quick to correct the U.S. leader's claim, asserting in a tweet that "Alabama will NOT see any impacts from Dorian" as "the system will remain too far east."

Despite the NWS's assertions, Trump insisted throughout the week that his claim had been accurate, with the U.S. leader even bringing out a map that appeared to have been modified with a Sharpie to show an altered projection of Hurricane Dorian's path.

On Sunday, Ivanka Trump learned that her father's "Sharpiegate" blunder had yet to be forgotten by the American public after she tweeted out plans to visit Alabama, which was not affected by Hurricane Dorian despite the president's early predictions.

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[font size="8"]The Alt Right
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The Alt Right has not been having what one would call a “banner year”. People are waking up to the mess that the Proud Boys are leaving in Portland, the Straight Pride Parade was a complete and utter disaster, and now some of their idols are eating some much deserved shit. Like Alex Jones, for instance – you know what a dumpster fire Infowars has been since the Parkland shooting. But let’s go way back to the Sandy Hook shooting – which is still causing headaches for the alt right brand. How bad is it? Well, Alex can go talk to his tin foil hat, probably while he’s in prison. And well, may he rot.

Infowars founder Alex Jones has lost another legal battle against families who lost loved ones in the Sandy Hook Elementary School mass shooting.

Jones must now pay all costs associated with an appeal filed against a parent of a Sandy Hook Elementary School victim, says the Texas Court of Appeals.

Neil Heslin’s six-year-old son Jesse Lewis was killed during the mass shooting in 2012. Heslin filed a motion of contempt against Jones when he refused to release internal Infowars documents and emails related to Sandy Hook. Heslin’s attorney Bill Ogden says the refusal brought the case to a standstill.

“As soon as he filed his notice of appeal the case stopped. We never got the discovery, we never got the answers to our questions for deposition, we never got any documents,” Ogden said. “They objected to everything and said the court doesn’t have this power.”

Lawyers for Jones did not immediately respond for comment. His claims that the Sandy Hook shooting was staged led several families of Sandy Hook victims to file defamation lawsuits against Jones.

And by the way since we haven’t heard from or checked in with Alex for a while, what’s he been up to lately? Oh yeah he’s pushing a theory about weather balloons being used to turn the weather into a weapon. I mean dude, really, you know that Geostorm was just a movie, right?

Alex Jones’ Infowars outlet is pushing conspiracy theories that claim Hurricane Dorian is being controlled by weather weapons, possibly in an attempt to cause problems for President Donald Trump. While Infowars’ weather-themed conspiracy theories are often humorous, they also represent how leading conspiracy theorists use weather events to indoctrinate their followers into believing that climate change is a hoax.

During a broadcast this week, after Hurricane Dorian ravaged the Bahamas and continued to approach the United States, Jones took a call from a woman who put forth a theory that someone used weather control to park Dorian over the Bahamas so that they could blackmail Trump “to play ball” otherwise they would “take out several thousand people over the Eastern Seaboard” and hit Mar-A-Lago in Florida. Jones gave a rambling response, referencing his belief that the technology to control hurricanes exists and his infamous comments about tornadoes that hit Oklahoma in 2013. He then praised the caller’s theory and said, “It’s very legitimate to say that, very legitimate to question that, so I appreciate your call. Really powerful subject you brought up.”

Wouldn’t it be great if we could just make a movie nothing but disasters? Cut out the crappy story and unnecessary side characters and just focus on the destruction? Oh one can dream. But remember when Alex got banned from Youtube? Well, he and a few other alt right personalities saw their Youtube bans lifted, even if they were brief, but Alex lasted a little over an hour:

YouTube head Susan Wojcicki announced earlier this week that the video-sharing site would allow some content that was "outside the mainstream, controversial or even offensive." So, Alex Jones' InfoWars took that as a positive sign.

InfoWars' afternoon show The War Room relaunched its YouTube channel with a video titled "Breaking! YouTube CEO says 'Alex Jones' and 'Infowars Ban Is Over.'" War Room host J. Owen Shroyer uploaded 13 videos before YouTube pulled them. In a video posted on the InfoWars site, he angrily denounced both Google and Wojcicki. Shroyer also confronted Google employees on camera at the company's offices in Austin, Texas about its decision.

"Everyone sees the double-standard at YouTube," Shroyer said, echoing complaints of political conservatives who claim tech platforms censor their views.

According to the Washington Post, War Room violated YouTube's terms of service by circumventing the 2018 InfoWars ban by the site for violating its policies against hate speech. As I noted before, Alex Jones relies on associates to spread his message on social media where he is unable to operate. I reached out to Shroyer on social media and through the InfoWars site and haven't heard back.

Now speaking of alt right losers, let’s head over to Pennsylvania where the town of Haverford recently found out that a leader of a nearby fire department was forced to close after one of its’ leaders alleged ties to the organization known as the Proud Boys. Yeah, they’re not exactly a group one should be associating themselves with right now.

A Pennsylvania fire company that was closed after its leadership refused to address that one of its volunteer members had been affiliated with the "Proud Boys" group has apologized and accepted the member’s resignation.

The move paves the way for the Bon Air Fire Company in Haverford Township, a township with about 48,400 residents west of Philadelphia, to reopen, the local government said in a statement Monday.

"The initial decision to refuse the resignation was a mistake," the Bon Air Fire Company said in a statement.

The fire company said it focused on its relationship with the firefighter, who has not been identified, but the community’s response “makes clear that the faith of many of the community members in the Fire Company has been undermined. It is our responsibility to restore this trust."

The Proud Boys has been called an extremist organization and labeled a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center. The fire company acknowledged the designation of the SPLC and the Anti-Defamation League in announcing its reversal.

Yes, the Proud Boys do suck. The final one of the favorites of the Alt Right that I want to talk about this week may have hit rock bottom, and that’s once mega popular hatemonger Milo Yiannopolous – who was famously kicked off Twitter last year – is broke. Yeah times are tough without that social media money coming in, aren’t they?

Silicon Valley appears to have blown up Milo Yiannopoulos’s business model.

The disgraced right-wing troll is complaining that the major social media companies have effectively cut off his alt-right audience — and crushed his ability to make a decent living.

The former Breitbart tech writer shared the complaints on Telegram, a messaging app where some alt-right allies have set up shop after getting the boot by larger tech platforms. Yiannopoulos was banned from Twitter in 2016 for directing racist abuse at the comedian Leslie Jones, losing nearly 400,000 followers. He was banned from Facebook in May.

“I spent years growing and developing and investing in my fan base, and they just took it away in a flash,” wrote Yiannopoulos, who’s previously rubbed shoulders with neo-Nazis and white nationalists. “It’s nice to have a little private chat with my gold star homies but I can’t make a career out of a handful of people like that. I can’t put food on the table this way.”

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Inside Fruitport High
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines! This is Top 10 Investigates!

Mass shootings are at an all time high. There have been over 200 this year and we’re only in the 9th month of the calendar year 2019. As such, mass shooting hysteria has been at an all time high. Which makes sense – nobody wants to die needlessly. And since banning guns flat out, or voluntarily disarming in this country is taboo subject matter, thanks to those in the National Rifle Association, new extremes are being taken to prevent what should normally be something that people shouldn’t have to worry about, but thanks to mass shootings America is resorting to extreme measures in the name of protection and safety. One such is the controversial $50 million building that will become Michigan’s Fruitport High School. It’s being designed with mass shootings in mind.

Curved hallways, protective "wing walls," impact-resistant windows, doors that lock with a touch of a smartphone.

These are some of the design elements Fruitport High School in western Michigan's Muskegon County will implement in its new building, set to open summer 2021.

Fruitport Community Schools Superintendent Bob Szymoniak said the measures, which were supplemented by a $404,707 grant from Michigan State Police, can potentially save lives in an active shooter situation.

"So often, we feel like we’re going to be hapless victims – that there’s nothing that we can do until after it (a shooting) happens," he said. "But what I’m learning is there’s a lot we can do on the front end."
Illustrations of concrete wing walls in the new Fruitport High School building. The walls are designed to allow for students to take cover and to cut down the line of sight of an active shooter.

Szymoniak said the idea to design the new building with non-traditional safety measures came after a group of parents in the community advocated for a new high school building to replace the one built in the 1950s. It was agreed that a new facility will be built around the old one, and to do this, the hallways had to be curved.

So, since banning guns is out of the question, constructing a $50 million school that resembles something of a correctional facility is just one of many possibilities. But is it really safe? Is having all this extra technology really going to help in the long run or is just a temporary solution to an even greater problem? Well the greater problem is guns but it’s much more complicated than that.

Engineers in World War I dug through the earth to build serpentine trenches borne from horrifically clear logic.

If enemy soldiers ever breached it, the zigzagging pattern would prevent them from shooting in a straight line down the length of the trench — leaving only a relative few exposed to gunfire or shrapnel.

That concept has been reinvigorated a century later, in a sense, for a western Michigan high school, to dampen the killing potential of a mass shooter.

A $48 million major construction project at Fruitport High School will add curved hallways to reduce a gunman’s range, jutting barriers to provide cover and egress, and meticulously spaced classrooms that can lock on demand and hide students in the corner, out of a killer’s sight.

“If I go to FPH and I want to be an active shooter, I’m going in knowing I have reduced sightlines,” Fruitport Superintendent Bob Szymoniak told The Washington Post about the curved hallways. “It has reduced his ability to do harm.”

The major overhaul of an existing building was driven by the ubiquity of mass shootings in the United States, Szymoniak said, citing the El Paso killings at a Walmart this month, along with notorious school shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut and Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Florida.

Let’s examine the keyword in that sentence there – “reduced”. That does not mean “completely eliminated”. There’s no guarantee that a school designed to prevent mass shootings would actually do so, especially if you give away the floor plans via the Washington Post article! It’s almost like they’re inviting it. But really what kind of generation are we creating when we can expect more of this and are actually inviting it?

The K-12 team at TowerPinkster is aiming to physically slow down school shooters through its $48-million renovation and addition to Fruitport High School in Western Michigan. The 189,822-square-foot project recently garnered national headlines because of its push to enhance safety within the 64-year-old institution, which previously featured narrow corridors and cramped gathering spaces.

TowerPinkster, an architecture, engineering, and interiors firm with expertise in educational spaces, worked with the National Institute of Crime Prevention to learn the most effective ways to secure the school’s campus, which is slated to reopen in 2021. By building on 143,879 square feet of new space that connects to the older structure, the design team was able to create a two-story, curved academic wing designed to reduce the sightlines of a potentially armed attacker. Each teaching space was conceived with “shadow zones” along the door-side walls where students and faculty can hide without being seen. Shatter-proof safety film was specified to cover the few windows that do look into the classrooms. In addition, cement block “wing walls” were added to stick out next to all doors and act as further barriers.

Currently under construction, this build-out is the fourth attempt to update the school since its opening in 1963. TowerPinkster has envisioned a new set of offices, an auditorium, media center, woodshop, cafeteria, and common area for Fruitport HS as well. The entry experience is also changing. Located at the opposite end of the classroom corridors, and looking directly at the parking lot, a staff member at reception would be able to see anyone walking into the school at any given time. They would also have the ability to lock down all classrooms, the vestibule door to the office, and the office door to the school using a three-button system.

And good luck remembering how that three button system works in a time of crisis like a mass shooting, where you might have literally a few seconds to think on your feet. It’s really scary to think that this is the new normal. That there’s nothing we can actually do about guns or mass shootings but to instead design ridiculously expensive buildings to prevent a few less casualties.

Amid reports indicating shootings are becoming more common at U.S. high schools, Bob Szymoniak says it's time to start designing school infrastructure to maximize the safety of students and staff.

Szymoniak is a school superintendent in west Michigan, where a $48-million US construction project is underway at Fruitport High School. The building is specially designed to make it harder for a potential shooter to get at their targets — and it's a type of school design that architects in other areas of the U.S. are starting to experiment with.

According to the Washington Post, more than 228,000 students have been exposed to gun violence since the Columbine High School shooting in Colorado in 1999.

Classes will begin at Fruitport High School on Sept. 3, but the construction is not expected to be finished until 2021.

That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters of Lansing! For the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time for our weekly reminder that the holiest among us are also the most full of:

My fair congregation! Why are our brothers and sisters on the right so completely off the wall batshit crazy? is someone… why yes we are allowed to swear in my church! The only rule we have here is that we do not mention the Unholy Dark One by his name! But this week since we have no central topic of discussion, we’re going to instead examine some incidents over the last week and let you draw your own conclusions. But is GAWD really to blame for these atrocities being committed? Or is it something else entirely? Well, let’s start first by discussing this incident from West Virginia where two pastors’ wives settled their arguments with… the gun! Cause that’s how we settle arguments here in ‘Murica! Yee haw!

A pastor's wife in West Virginia has been charged with reckless endangerment after allegedly firing a gun in a church parking lot.

Melinda Frye Toney, 44, is accused of pulling out a pistol that accidentally discharged during an argument with another pastor's wife at New Life Apostolic Church in Oak Hill on May 11.

Toney is the wife of New Life pastor Earl Toney while the other woman, Lori Haywood, is married to New Life's youth pastor, David Haywood,

Fayette Sheriff's Detective Kevin Willis told the Beckley Register-Herald the animosity between the two women had been simmering for some time. Their husbands had thought the women should publicly bury the hatchet to avoid additional strife.

"The pastor and the youth pastor had thought, 'Maybe we could get them together, we can hash this out and fix this before it escalates,' " Willis said Wednesday. "Of course, it just made it worse, I think."

According to Willis, "the straw that broke the camel's back" was an argument over a t-shirt Haywood had was wearing.

Yes, listen to the good reverend! Because I don’t remember the part in the Bible where JAYSUS shot first and asked questions later. Maybe he prayeth six times or only five? Well, you could blame overzealous pastors and youth pastors for the woes in society or you could blame – wait for it – Harry Potter! Yes, that’s what one Catholic church is doing in Tennessee. I mean really why think rationally when you can just ban things you don’t agree with?

A Roman Catholic school in Tennessee has banished JK Rowling's universally popular series of Harry Potter novels from its library shelves after its pastor took exception to their portrayal of magic, warning the spells and curses the author describes are real and “risk conjuring evil spirits” when read.

The Reverend Dan Reehill explained his decision in an email to the parents of students at St Edward Catholic School in Nashville, declaring that he had consulted with exorcists in the US and at the Vatican before outlawing the seven-volume tale of the boy wizard’s career at Hogwarts and his battle against Lord Voldermort and the forces of darkness.

“These books present magic as both good and evil, which is not true, but in fact a clever deception. The curses and spells used in the books are actual curses and spells; which when read by a human being risk conjuring evil spirits into the presence of the person reading the text,” the Reverend Reehill wrote, apparently in all seriousness.

Rebecca Hammel, the superintendent of schools for the Catholic Diocese of Nashville, told The Tennessean that the Reverend Reehill had indeed sent the email and has the final say on the matter, since the Catholic Church does not have an official position on Ms Rowling’s best-selling series.

Yes, you wish indeed! But why are my fellow zealots on the right so crazy? There’s plenty of reasons why you could say that they are crazy. But let’s examine the issues at hand – demons. Yes, DAYMONS are among us! And they are everywhere! Because let’s face it, in the eyes of those on the other side, they have more morals and values than those who don’t! And that’s just bullshit.

The deadly massacre, which began at a traffic stop between Odessa and Midland on Saturday afternoon, has intensified pressure on GOP lawmakers to enact stricter gun control measures. The attack came just weeks after a gunman opened fire in Dayton, Ohio, killing nine with an assault weapon and another stormed a Walmart in El Paso, Texas, leaving 22 dead and dozens more injured.

During a Fox & Friends segment discussing the West Texas massacre on Sunday, Tony Perkins — a former police officer who's currently president of the Family Research Council, a Christian conservative policy and lobbying organization — attempted to blame America's allegedly dwindling morality for the country's uptick in mass shootings.

"It's tragic and at some point we have to realize we have a problem as a nation, and the problem is not the absence of laws. It's an absence of morality," Perkins said, "[which is] really the result of a decades-long march through the institutions of America, driving religion and God from the public square."

"What do we need to do as a country?" the show's host asked Perkins.

"I'm willing to sit down with the left who say, 'I don't want to hear anymore about your prayers,'" the former police officer replied. "Well, I agree. Praying alone is not enough, it's time to act. It's not just about having a conversation about restricting those who should not have guns — criminals — but it's also a discussion of the absence of a moral core in our culture today."

And that’s certainly true, sir! No one is saying those things! But… what if I told you that amidst all the craziness in our country that the Mormons would be the most sane and rational of us all? Yes, while Christians are fighting amongst themselves over who is the more holier than thou holiest person on the planet, the Mormons are the ones actually telling us to put our pieces away while you are worshipping the LAwRD!

Most members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints already knew they were discouraged from taking their guns to church on Sunday, but it is making sure that message is crystal clear by tweaking the policy to prohibit all lethal weapons.

The previous policy called it inappropriate to have weapons on church property. It still includes an exception for law enforcement officers.

The clarification comes one year after a fatal shooting inside one of its churches in rural Nevada and as religions around the country grapple with how to deal with gun violence that has spread to places of worship.

The change went into effect the first week of August and a letter explaining it was first sent to local leaders in Texas and shared with members there, said church spokesman Daniel Woodruff. The impetus was a new Texas law that takes effect soon that makes it clearer in state law that licensed handgun holders can carry weapons in churches, synagogues and other houses of worship.

The same letter will be sent elsewhere to local leaders, who will be responsible for sharing it with their congregations, Woodruff said.

Actually this is one instance where the Devil doesn’t walk among us! Mass has ended, may you go in peace!! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: Moscow Mitch
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We’ve all had terrible nicknames. Just ask anyone who’s ever been through grade school. I mean remember in grade school when kids used to just call kids “Poopyhead McBoogerface” and that would be the end of it? Thank god we’re not kids in the social media era, where you can get called about 600 racist slurs on Twitter and not get in trouble for it. But you know what? We get over it. And also, we’re not the Senate Majority Leader, Mitch McConnell. So in case you don’t follow the social media sphere, Mitch McConnell has been given the nickname “Moscow Mitch” for his inability to act on gun reform legislation that is designed to save lives and get guns out of the hands of the extremely dangerous. So why does Mitch have his underwear in a wad over this subject?

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky., complained to right-wing radio host Hugh Hewitt on Tuesday that "Moscow Mitch," the nickname given to the top Republican by critics of his decision to block election security legislation despite documented evidence of Russian interference in the 2016 elections, was "over the top" and a form of "modern-day McCarthyism."

After Hewitt referred to the disparaging moniker as "McCarthyism," the Senate Majority Leader responded that "I mean, it’s modern-day McCarthyism. Unbelievable for a Cold Warrior like me who spent a career standing up to the Russians to be given a moniker like that. It’s an effort to smear me. You know, I can laugh about things like the 'Grim Reaper,' but calling me 'Moscow Mitch' is over the top."

Hewitt agreed, telling McConnell that "it is simply an assertion that you’re doing the bidding of Moscow, which is, of course, pure McCarthyism. I thought we were past that in this country. I really did, and especially if you’ve overseen the biggest defense spending hikes out of the Congress in a decade."

Historically speaking, McCarthyism did not refer merely to politicians who were viewed as being soft on Russia but rather those who were specifically perceived as being sympathetic to communism. McCarthyists attacked liberals by implying that their progressive politics meant they were emotionally aligned, if not outright betraying America toward, authoritarian states like China and the Soviet Union. The term "Moscow Mitch," by contrast, is not used to disparage McConnell's ideology but instead to call him out for his opposition to take up election security legislation that would prevent Russia from further meddling in America's democratic process, as it did in the 2016 elections.

Yeah boo fucking hoo, Mitch! And you know what? If you can dish it out, you can almost certainly take it! So our Senate Majority Leader is as much of a crybaby as @realDonaldTrump is. I say let’s keep calling him that, and if he would ever come out of his shell and do his job he might actually I don’t know, be respected? Ah who are we kidding! This is the Trump administration we’re talking about here, the Senate is as corrupt as the White House. So who’s mocking who, Mitch?

Sticks and stones may break his bones, but poor Mitch McConnell thinks words hurt him, too.

The Senate majority leader is distressed that people are calling him names. First there was “Moscow Mitch” (because he refuses to do anything significant to stop Russian interference in U.S. elections), and then there was “Massacre Mitch” and even “Murder Turtle” (because he refuses to take up gun-violence legislation despite massacre after massacre). At the risk of hurting the Kentucky Republican’s tender feelings still further, I suggest another moniker: Muzzle Mitch.

McConnell, who styles himself a champion of free speech, has lately not been such a fan of free speech directed against him. The psychological boo-boos done to his thin skin have stirred him to hypocrisy.

On radio host (and Post contributor) Hugh Hewitt’s show this week, McConnell renewed his complaint that calling him Moscow Mitch is unacceptable — “modern-day McCarthyism,” he said. “You know, I can laugh about things like the Grim Reaper, but calling me Moscow Mitch is over the top.”

Come on, Mitch!! Time to come out of your shell already! I’m sure he’s probably still pissed about getting called a turtle from way back when on the Jon Stewart Show. Although McCarthyism, do you really want to go there? And did you even know what McCarthyism is? I can give you a history lesson because you probably slept through that history class. But this is neither the time nor the place. Instead we’ll just continue to make fun of you until you do your job. I mean come on, even Nancy Pelosi is taking some jabs at you!

“I was called unpatriotic, un-American and essentially treasonous by a couple of left-wing pundits on the basis of bold-faced lies. I was accused of aiding and abetting the very man I’ve singled out as an adversary and opposed for nearly 20 years, Vladimir Putin,” McConnell said in a speech on the Senate floor.

McConnell accused critics in the media, specifically The Washington Post and MSNBC, of engaging in "unhinged smears," calling it "modern-day McCarthyism.”

The Washington Post, at the time, published an opinion column headlined "Mitch McConnell is a Russian asset," while MSNBC's Joe Scarborough called McConnell "Moscow Mitch" and attacked his decision to block the election security bills as "un-American."

The bills blocked by McConnell would require the use of paper ballots and direct candidates or campaigns to notify the FBI about offers of assistance from foreign governments.

Moscow Mitch is nothing compared to the kind of insults that guy can dish out! And by the way if you think there’s a republican double standard on nicknames, well, I got news for ya! There’s republican double standards on everything, and it’s always the worst kind of discrimination – it’s the kind against them! These fuckers can dish it out, but they sure as hell can’t take it!

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell doesn't like it when you call him #MoscowMitch. He hates it so much that he'll accuse you of being a McCarthyist for doing so. If the accusation was untrue — that is, if McConnell, President Donald Trump and other Republicans weren't empowering Russia at the expense of America for their personal benefit — then #MoscowMitch and talk of collusion in Trump's 2016 presidential campaign would be unfair, even unjust. As the facts currently stand, however, it is a perfectly fair label.

They still are not McCarthyist, though, because McCarthyism wasn't really about hating Russia — it was about hating liberals.

A quick history lesson. Joseph McCarthy was a United States senator from Wisconsin who served between 1947 and 1957. His political heyday, however, lasted from 1950 to 1954. On February 9, 1950, he delivered an infamous speech in Wheeling, West Virginia in which he claimed without evidence that he had "a list of 205 [State Department employees] that were known to the Secretary of State as being members of the Communist Party and who nevertheless are still working and shaping the policy of the State Department." Notice that he did not say "Russians" or "traitors to Russia." This isn't because the Soviet Union (the empire controlled by Russia during the bulk of the 20th century) wasn't America's primary geopolitical enemy at the time, or that there wasn't a valid and widespread fear of that nation. Rather it is because the assumption wasn't simply that people would betray America to Russia, but that they would do so because the Soviet Union's authoritarian left-wing ideology was being conflated with all forms of liberalism. When McCarthy warned of "Communists," he was using a dog whistle to vilify anyone whose beliefs were to the left of what he and his supporters deemed acceptable.

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[font size="8"]NO: Hollywood Blacklisting
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OK look, I get it. The political climate in this country is so toxic that it’s literally driving everyone absolutely batshit crazy. But is this what we really need right now? I’m talking about of course Trump’s feud with Will & Grace star Debra Messing. Look, look. As long as we keep giving conservatives things to complain about, they will complain about them. Because as we’ve seen time and time again on this program, conservatives only have two settings: Complain mode and say batshit crazy stuff mode. Yeah that’s a setting, look it up! But does that mean that we should make them go away completely? No! They may be boorish and unrelenting crazy people but we can’t blacklist them from an entire industry, after all, Hitler was a failed artist you know!

Donald Trump has launched a renewed attack on Will and Grace actor Debra Messing, calling her racist for retweeting an controversial image, as a powerful hurricane continued tearing into regions along the US east coast.

The president's attacks came just a day after the actor apologised for expressing support for a church sign that claimed "a black vote for Trump is mental illness." The actor had retweeted an image of the sign, which was in Alabama, writing, "Thank you Alabama".

"Bad 'actress' Debra The Mess Messing is in hot water," the president wrote on Twitter on Thursday.

Mr Trump continued, amplifying claims that were originally made by comedian Terrence K Williams, who was seen in a video scolding Ms Messing for supporting the sign in the since-deleted tweet. Mr Williams had encouraged his followers to use the hashtag "#RacistDebraMessing", which became a trending topic on Twitter on Wednesday.

The president also claimed, in apparent reference to comments by Whoopi Goldberg about Ms Messing's tweet, that the actor was attempting to employ the methods of Joseph McCarthy, who made wild claims of treason against his political enemies in the 1940s and 1950s. Those methods, known today as McCarthyism, resulted in blacklists for professionals believed to be communists or communist sympathisers.

That’s a good question sir! Yeah, there’s nothing about this story that is good – whether President Tweets-A-Lot is trying to get her fired, to the Russian trollbots, to a suggestion of a new era of McCarthyism. You know what, seriously both sides need to take a step back and pull their heads out of each others’ asses. Yeah, I do realize that we lean heavily to the left, but you know what? I don’t want Trump trolls banned from society! As Ann Coulter said, we need to keep a couple of them around to remind us what they stood for.

In the latest round, the president called the 'Will and Grace' star a "racist" and claimed she was trying to create a "blacklist" of his famous supporters.

The Twitter feud between President Donald Trump and actress Debra Messing continued Thursday with Trump again attacking the Will and Grace star, who had previously asked that a list of attendees for an upcoming fundraiser in Beverly Hills be made public.

In the latest round, Trump called the Will and Grace star a "racist" and claimed she was trying to create a "blacklist" of his famous supporters.

“Bad ‘actress’ Debra The Mess Messing is in hot water," he began in what would become a two-tweet ramble. "She wants to create a ‘Blacklist’ of Trump supporters, & is being accused of McCarthyism. Is also being accused of being a Racist because of the terrible things she said about blacks and mental illness. If Roseanne Barr said what she did, even being on a much higher rated show, she would have been thrown off television. Will Fake News NBC allow a McCarthy style Racist to continue? ABC fired Roseanne. Watch the double standard!”

The previous day, Messing apologized after she "liked" a photo of a church sign that called black Trump voters “mentally ill," and subsequently led to the hashtag #RacistDebraMessing.

Trump's "blacklist" comment comes two days after Whoopi Goldberg called out Messing and her co-star Eric McCormack for calling on The Hollywood Reporter to print the names of those attending the fundraiser after THR reported that the event would be taking place.

No that’s not a joke here, none of this in fact! Really Debra Messing, you don’t go around even joking about blacklisting people. And considering that our president is the world’s biggest Twitter troll, don’t go around giving him fuel for the fire. I mean look at what he’s doing to John Legend and Chrissy Tiegan! Yeah there’s that.

The spat between Debra Messing and President Trump is heating up, with POTUS on Thursday calling the actress a “McCarthy style Racist.” He also wonders whether NBC will give the actress the boot, a la ABC and Roseanne Barr, for her recent Twitter activity supporting both the listing of Trump donors and a church sign that name-called both black and white Trump supporters.

On Twitter, #RacistDebraMessing trended Wednesday after the actress apologized for liking a Baptist church’s sign that called black Trump voters “mentally ill” and white votes for the president “pure racism.”

“Bad ‘actress’ Debra The Mess Messing is in hot water,” Trump tweeted Thursday. “She wants to create a ‘Blacklist’ of Trump supporters, & is being accused of McCarthyism. Is also being accused of being a Racist because of the terrible things she said about blacks and mental illness. If Roseanne Barr said what she did, even being on a much higher rated show, she would have been thrown off television. Will Fake News NBC allow a McCarthy style Racist to continue? ABC fired Roseanne. Watch the double standard!”

Messing apologized Wednesday for liking the church sign and defended herself to a critic.

“NUMBER 1– I apologized for liking that church sign. I said I regret it. I shud have thought before recklessly suppprting,” Messing said in a series of tweets. “You won’t accept this but black people are targeted by Trump’s GOP for voter supression. Charlottesville was about Trump supporters hating POC and Jews. THAT is where my support of a sign at a southern black church came from. The use of the term ‘mentally ill’ was wrong & hurtful. NUMBER 2 I NEVER NOR WOULD I EVER call for a blacklist of anyone for any reason. The info is publicly available.”

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[font size="8"]I Need A Drink: Fast Food Wars
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Hey everyone! We’re back from two weeks off and already I need a drink!

Of course you know the idea behind this segment is that we all need a break from talking too much politics, and booze and politics do not mix, like the phrase “business casual” and whatever Kevin Smith happens to be wearing. This week we’re going to talk about the fast food craze being launched by Popeye’s Chicken. Tell me bartender, what goes well with a fast food chicken sandwich? A 40 Oz of Mickey’s? What? I guess Old English is too classy? Ah you know what we’ll do a couple of 40s for this segment. Yeah in case you’re living under a rock, Popeye’s Chicken has broken fast food with the launch of their first ever chicken sandwich.

Unless you've been living under a pile of KFC's new Beyond Meat-collab chicken, you've probably heard rumblings about Popeyes' latest chicken sandwich in the United States. So what's the deal?

It's late on a Friday night, you can't be bothered to cook and you feel you deserve a cheat day. Your first solution to this issue probably isn't Popeyes, the franchise after all only has 26 restaurants in the UAE right now compared to McDonald's' 158. Across the pond in the U.S. on the other hand, there's Popeyes mania as far as the eye can see.

Popeyes is an American chain of fried chicken fast food restaurants founded in 1972 in New Orleans, Louisiana and is headquartered in Miami, Florida. It has about 3,000 branches worldwide compared to McDonald's' 37,855.

On August 12, 2019, the Popeyes Chicken Sandwich went on sale across the majority of its American branches. Fast-forward to August 27 and Popeyes announced that the sandwich was sold out everywhere and it'll take an undisclosed amount of time to restock.

Oh yeah that’s good stuff! Although unfortunately we didn’t get to try a Popeye’s fried chicken sandwich, so we had our sous chef Fernando whip us up a couple of very similar tasting breaded chicken sandwiches prepared exactly the same way that Popeye’s does it. Oh yeah these are good! Excellent work Fernando! I just wish we could have tried one the same way that Diplo did, because why the fuck not?

Popeyes really, really wanted Diplo to give its new, sold-out chicken sandwich a shot.

After the famous DJ, whose real name is Thomas Pentz, apparently expressed interest in trying the wildly popular menu item, the chain, which is formally known as Popeyes Louisiana Kitchen, sent the “Close to Me” songwriter a private jet filled with plenty of chicken sandwiches to go around.

“Popeye’s heard I wanted to try their sandwich so they sent me some in a jet,” the 40-year-old wrote on Instagram on Sunday, September 1.

He later added: “Wendy’s your move,” seemingly referencing the fast-food fight that played out after Popeyes’ sandwich made its big debut last month.

In the accompanying photo, the Grammy winner can be seen exiting a Popeyes-branded private plane with a Popeyes bag (presumably filled with chicken sandwiches) in each hand.

Though it’s not exactly clear how or when Diplo received the special delivery, he did share an Instagram Story of himself eating the sandwich aboard the private plane. According to Delish, a fellow passenger could be heard saying, “We got ’em, man,” in the background.

Ah nothing goes better than the combination the combination of booze and greasy fast food, so why not chug? At least Diplo got to try it with a private jet. This dude from Texas not only didn’t get to try it, he pulled a gun on a poor unsuspecting Popeye’s clerk. Yeah that’s where we are at as a society – don’t have what I want? Bam! Gun in the face!

A man pulled a gun at a Popeyes restaurant in Houston after being told they were out of chicken sandwiches, police say.

Houston police Lt. Larry Crowson says officers were called to the restaurant Monday night after a group of people tried to order a chicken sandwich.

Crowson says, "When the manager told them they were out, one of the males became upset and pulled a pistol and demanded a chicken sandwich. The manager again informed them they were out of sandwiches."

Crowson says the group then left and no one was injured. He says police are reviewing surveillance footage.

So if you can’t get one of these Popeyes’ chicken sandwiches any time soon, either you can get them by gun or you can get them by private jet. Oh wait, my producers are telling me you can’t get them with a gun. But you can eat them if you win the Little League World Series. What? Come on!!! Enough with treating champion athletes with fast food!!! We got it when Trump did it the first time but this is getting old!!

The Eastbank All-Stars, the Little League champions from Louisiana, took a special visit Sunday to the Governor's Mansion where they had an even more exclusive meal.

Governor John Bel Edwards surprised the boys with sold-out Popeyes chicken sandwiches, both spicy and mild.

The sandwiches and the baseball team caught international attention around the same time. While the sandwiches were selling out at stores around the world, the boys were beating other Little League teams from around the world.

Both made countless headlines.

"The only place in the world that you can get a Popeyes Chicken sandwich is at the Governor's Mansion tonight," Edwards tweeted. "Only the best for Louisiana's own 2019 Little League World Series Champions! #LouisianaProud."

But in case you’re wondering if the elusive sandwich will make an appearance, never fear! We have a generic corporate PR press release for you! Because nothing says “we care” than a generic corporate PR press release. And really, I’m just going to keep eating these sandwiches that Fernando made, because fuck fast food.

Across the nation, Popeyes locations are hung with homemade signs reading “no chicken sandwiches ” and “do apologize we out [sic] chicken sandwich” and simply “SANDWICH SOLD OUT.” The fried chicken chain is very sorry, but it has no more sandwiches to sell.

Popeyes announced the shortage on Twitter on August 27, eight days after a tweet from rival Chick-fil-A (and a pointed “...y’all good?” in response) set off a social media melee that pitted chicken sandwich against chicken sandwich and sent customers to the restaurants in droves. For Chick-fil-A, the spike in demand from the so-called #ChickenWars wasn’t an issue — apart from french fries and soft drinks, sandwiches are the company’s (brioche) bread and butter and have been since the recipe was introduced in 1967.

But for Popeyes, the sandwich is a new menu item, released only two weeks before the supply ran dry. It was in development for two years, according to the Wall Street Journal, as the company’s chefs tested various iterations of buttermilk batter, boneless chicken breast filets, sour pickles, and buttered brioche buns. In planning for its launch, Popeyes “aggressively forecasted demand through the end of September,” the company said in a statement, but ultimately it blew through the inventory of chicken filets a month ahead of schedule.

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[font size="8"]Keeping Up With The Candidates Ep. 6: The Dropouts
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Welcome back to our handy 2020 voters’ guide which puts all of your info about your favorite candidates, dropouts, has beens, almost rans and front runners – Keeping Up With The Candidates, because we all want to kick Trump to the curb and get our country back on track. But this week there’s been a shakeup! Not one but two candidates have left the race. The herd is thinning and soon we will have our challenger to @realDonaldTrump. In fact he’s scared folks that one might have been emerging but in fact he uses her dropout to just be a colossal horse’s ass.

Senator Kirsten Gillibrand of New York, who presented herself in the presidential race as a champion of women and families, said Wednesday that she was withdrawing from the Democratic primary after failing to qualify for a third debate next month — a development she described as fatal to her candidacy.

Ms. Gillibrand said in an interview that she would endorse another candidate in the primary but had not yet picked a favorite. Though she stopped short of saying she would endorse a woman, Ms. Gillibrand, who has made electing women to Congress a personal cause, said the next president had to be capable of uniting the country and suggested that a woman might be best suited for the job.

“I think that women have a unique ability to bring people together and heal this country,” Ms. Gillibrand said, adding, “I think a woman nominee would be inspiring and exciting.”

But she added: “I will support whoever the nominee is, and I will do whatever it takes to beat Trump.”

Ms. Gillibrand, 52, had anchored her candidacy in issues of women’s equality, with a strong emphasis on abortion rights. She pledged to screen nominees for judgeships based on their support for the Roe v. Wade decision legalizing abortion, and held rallies in two Republican-leaning states, Georgia and Missouri, where conservative lawmakers recently passed new restrictions on the procedure.

Al Franken says hi by the way! Too soon? Well Gillibrand may be out but that doesn’t give Trump an excuse to act like a horse’s ass. Oh wait, who am I kidding? Trump doesn’t need an excuse to act like a horse’s ass. Hell, he doesn’t even need to act. He just naturally is a horse’s ass, and I really shouldn’t keep saying that because that’s just insulting to the horses. Horses’ asses produce something useful – fertilizer. Trump just produces… shit.

President Trump mocked Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-N.Y.) less than an hour after she dropped out of the Democratic presidential primary race.

“A sad day for the Democrats, Kirsten Gillibrand has dropped out of the Presidential Primary. I’m glad they never found out that she was the one I was really afraid of!,” Trump tweeted Wednesday.

President Trump mocked Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-N.Y.) less than an hour after she dropped out of the Democratic presidential primary race.

“A sad day for the Democrats, Kirsten Gillibrand has dropped out of the Presidential Primary. I’m glad they never found out that she was the one I was really afraid of!,” Trump tweeted Wednesday.

Trump's remarks came shortly after Gillibrand announced she was ending her campaign, leaving the field with 20 candidates.

Gillibrand's decision also came hours before the deadline to qualify for the September primary debate. The New York Democrat had not met the criteria to appear on next month's debate stage.

“I know this isn't the result we wanted. We wanted to win this race," Gillibrand said in a video posted to Twitter. "But it's important to know when it's not your time and to know how you can best serve your community and country. I believe I can best serve by helping to unite us to beat Donald Trump in 2020.

Gillibrand, who has long advocated for victims of sexual assault, faced backlash over her past calls for former Sen. Al Franken (D-Minn.) to resign amid allegations of sexual misconduct. The New York senator similarly took on Trump, calling for his resignation over allegations of sexual assault.

Damn straight! Since we’ve been off too, our last profile Jay Inslee dropped out of the race. The Washington governor decided that he would be more useful serving the people of Washington than running a campaign where he was in… well… last place. And nobody wants to spend the time and money it would take to do that.

Washington Gov. Jay Inslee is dropping out of the 2020 presidential race, he announced Wednesday night on MSNBC’s “The Rachel Maddow Show.”

Inslee had centered his campaign around climate change, calling it “the most urgent challenge of our time.

“This is our moment to put the greatest threat to our existence, to our economy, to our health, at the very top of the nation’s agenda,” Inslee said in March at his campaign’s kickoff event in Seattle.

He put out a detailed 10-year plan on how he’d move the country to clean energy, spurring other candidates to put out their own plans. Butting heads with the Democratic National Committee, he demanded that the organization hold a debate focused on climate change.

The DNC rebuffed his pleas in June, but CNN announced soon afterthat it would hold a town hall on the issue with the 2020 candidates in September. Inslee, however, did not meet the polling criteria the network used for the event — a minimum of 2 percent in four DNC-recognized polls — and was not on the list of attendees the network announced on Tuesday.

Oh and switching gears, by the way we talk a lot about what’s going on in the election because it needs to be stressed how important it is to kick Trump to the curb, and while we have to report on every single candidate and issue that might come up, there’s one thing that has @realDonaldTrump running scared. It’s that one thing that republicans are so afraid of – socialism! Yes, it’s gaining in popularity folks!

This year, Trump has repeatedly told friends and donors that running against “socialism” in a general election may not be “so easy” because of its populist draw, according to four Republicans and sources close to Trump who’ve heard him say this over the past several months.


That Trump has been conceding that socialism could be politically potent didn’t catch Sanders’ campaign by surprise.

“One of the reasons I feel so strongly about Bernie’s ability to beat Trump is because we know that the Democratic nominee will have to credibly explain that Trump betrayed the working class with false promises and that he does not put forward real solutions to help struggling people,” said Faiz Shakir, Sanders’ 2020 campaign manager. “Bernie can and will do that successfully. We’ll have a national debate about policies that help the one percent versus policies that lift the 99. I get the sense Trump knows the reckoning is coming and is worried about being exposed as a fraud. No Sharpie edits will save him.”

For Sanders to get to the point of having a national debate with Trump over the merits of socialism, he must first survive the Democratic primary. But even if he doesn’t make it through that gauntlet, the Senator will have managed to move the contours of the debate. Four years ago, Sanders and his team were warning liberals that they shouldn’t underestimate Trump’s appeal, precisely because it spoke to the desire for voters to have government side with them over the elites.


[font size="4"]Next Week:[/font]

Next week we’re going to Georgia’s 6th District to hang out with the guy who could be a key vote in turning the Senate blue – John Ossoff!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest are an awesome psychedelic experimental band from Melbourne, Australia. Their latest album is called “Fishing For Fishies”, you can see them on tour now through the end of October. Playing their song “This Thing”, give it up for King Gizzard &The Lizard Wizard!

Thank you Michigan State! This was fun! We’re off to Chicago and Northwestern next! See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Michigan State University, Lansing, MI
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