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Tue Sep 3, 2019, 09:26 AM

More Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today: Category Five Stupidity Edition

Category Five Stupidity is in full swing, as "The Chosen One" deals with the massive hurricane swirling off the US coast by...golfing. And the greedy and bigoted people who support him are okay with it.

This leads us into our fortieth look at right wing doublethink!

Reposts and Updates:

And the list grows again:
* Degenerate Perverts Unfit For Public Life: Joe Biden, John Conyers, John Edwards, Al Franken, Elliot Spitzer, Anthony Wiener; Great Americans Who Believe In Family Values And Deserve A "Mulligan" or Two Or Three: Joe Barton, Herman Cain, Larry Craig, Joe Fain, Jerry Fallwell Jr, Mark Foley (New/Revised), Will Gardner, Newt Gingrich, Eric Greitens, Curtis Hill, Duncan Hunter, Jim Jordan, Brett Kavanaugh, Nathan Larson, Rush Limbaugh, Vance McAllister, Roy Moore, Bill O'Reilly, Bill Sanderson (New); Mark Sanford, David Stringer, Clarence Thomas, Donald Trump, David Vitter, and Steve Wynn (#32, Feb. 2018)

* The best way to keep America safe: cozy up to autocrats like Vladimir Putin and Kim Jong Un while alienating democracies and long-time allies like Canada, France, Germany, the UK, Japan, and Denmark (#34, Aug 2018)

All-New More Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today:

* Air superiority was the key to winning the Revolutionary War

What...what was he smocking that day?

* Relevant: Jeffrey Epstein hung out with Bill Clinton a few times. Irrelevant: Jeffrey Epstein's twenty-year friendship with Donald Trump

* You're shocked when the anti-woman party doesn't try to elect more women.

* Being "The Family Values Party" clearly means supporting a stripper golf tournament.

* Capital crime: Talking to a woman while black (I almost said "New capital crime" but we know that isn't true.)

* You can accuse Democrats of using "foul language & racist hatred" with a straight face. You're Donald Trump, who started your political career calling Mexicans "rapists and drug dealers" and you used the F-bomb frequently on the campaign trail.

* Enslavement, lynchings, and segregation were "gifts"

Hunter of DailyKos pointed this one out:
* When only a handful of Republicans publicly criticize Trump, it illustrates strong party unity. When a handful of Democrats publicly criticize Pelosi, it illustrates civil war within the party.

Verbatim from commentor Navy Vet Terp on that thread:
* Democrats are radicals because some support Medicare for All and an as yet vaguely defined Green New Deal. Republicans are not radicals for excusing blatant racism, constricting the right to vote, supporting the removal of millions from health insurance, and denying science.

* You're tired of being called a racist just because you hate Muslims and people who speak Spanish.

* White supremacy is a hoax and "conspiracy theory". QAnon is real.

* Solution to white supremacists murdering people with high powered weaponry: Banning violent video games.

* There's nothing suspicious about the death of a high-profile pedophile sex trafficker and longtime friend of Trump, one day after incriminating documents were released by a court--even though the accused had been on suicide watch and he was under the care of a Federal department run by Trump appointees.

* Rape and incest are good things.

* Newest crime: Fundraising While Black.

* Appropriate birthday gift for a ten year-old? High powered rifle!

* Donald Trump proves that he's a humble man of God by declaring himself The King of Israel and The Chosen One.

Jesus of Nazareth and Anakin Skywalker both say 'FUCK YOU!!!" to that noise, Donnie.

* Best way to prevent devastating hurricanes: Nuking them!

Yeah, no way throwing a bunch of radioactive fallout into the ocean atmosphere could ever go wrong.

* The best place to track a hurricane is a golf course.

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Reply More Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today: Category Five Stupidity Edition (Original post)
Fritz67 Sep 3 OP
BSdetect Sep 3 #1

Response to Fritz67 (Original post)

Tue Sep 3, 2019, 10:33 AM

1. And so much left unsaid we could add. Volumes.

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