HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Main » General Discussion (Forum) » Denmark offers to buy Ame...

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 08:24 AM

Denmark offers to buy America from Russia

Mette Frederiksen, the Prime Minister of Denmark has reportedly expressed an interest in buying the Russian controlled territory of the United States of America.

Rich in natural resources and fuckwits the territory covers almost 10 million square kilometers and is said to contain huge oil and gas reserves and the largest number of fatties on the planet.

Russian Premier Vladimir Putin who bought the US with a Betamax videotape of two prostitutes urinating on a dementia patient told The Rochdale Herald. “It’s a pretty good deal and we’re open to discussing it with Denmark. Russia bought North America for the price of two hookers and a large bottle of Evian Water so anything over 75 rubels is a good return on our investment.”

“Denmark would be a pretty good acquirer for the territory. They’re the happiest country in the world, have an amazing welfare state and they can all read.”


[link:https://rochdaleherald.co.uk/2019/08/21/denmark-buy-america-from-russia/|

28 replies, 7438 views

Reply to this thread

Back to top Alert abuse

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 28 replies Author Time Post
Reply Denmark offers to buy America from Russia (Original post)
Soph0571 Aug 22 OP
50 Shades Of Blue Aug 22 #1
IdealsAndReal42 Aug 22 #2
triron Aug 22 #19
handmade34 Aug 22 #3
DinahMoeHum Aug 22 #4
colsohlibgal Aug 22 #5
iluvtennis Aug 22 #6
raccoon Aug 22 #7
Downtown Hound Aug 22 #8
Wounded Bear Aug 22 #9
Firestorm49 Aug 22 #10
FiveGoodMen Aug 22 #20
ananda Aug 22 #11
Scarsdale Aug 22 #12
IronLionZion Aug 22 #13
Scarsdale Aug 22 #14
FakeNoose Aug 22 #15
Grins Aug 22 #16
louis-t Aug 22 #17
Collimator Aug 22 #18
appalachiablue Aug 22 #21
rustysgurl Aug 22 #22
ancianita Aug 22 #23
warmfeet Aug 22 #24
burrowowl Aug 22 #25
RainCaster Aug 22 #26
MontanaMama Aug 23 #27
Hermit-The-Prog Aug 23 #28

Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 08:31 AM

1. Brilliant!

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 08:38 AM

2. Powerful joke in return of such stupidity.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to IdealsAndReal42 (Reply #2)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 11:08 AM

19. Ouch.

Almost embarrassing to be called an American nowadays.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 08:42 AM

3. touche'

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 08:53 AM

4. Tee hee hee!

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 08:57 AM

5. Awesome

The funniest zingers have some truth in them.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 09:07 AM

6. Bravo!

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 09:21 AM

7. Beautiful! Nt

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 09:29 AM

8. Maybe we can take up a collection fund to help them pay for it. n/t

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Downtown Hound (Reply #8)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 09:44 AM

9. Go Fund Me!

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 09:47 AM

10. Good one. I doubt if my Republican acquaintances would appreciate the humor.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Firestorm49 (Reply #10)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 02:36 PM

20. I know I wouldn't appreciate republican acquaintances

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:14 AM

11. That was great!!!

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:21 AM

12. This offer should be

made to the true leaders, Moscow Mitch and Hannity. They make all the important decisions.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:21 AM

13. Please do!

And implement the Nordic model of social programs and general liberalness here.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:25 AM

14. Copies of this should

be sent to EVERY gop representative in DC. They need to know what a laughingstock they have made of this country by backing a total brainless fool.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:28 AM

15. Somebody should send this to Chump



(Yes I know - wiener is misspelled. It's still cute.)

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:34 AM

16. "The world is laughing at us." - Smug orange weasel predicting our future, Nov 2012

"The world is laughing at us." - Smug, arrogant, orange weasel predicting our future, 06 Nov 2012.

Proof they are.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:49 AM

17. Haaa!!!

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 11:05 AM

18. Oh. My. Dog.

My eyes hurt--that was so brilliant.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 03:18 PM

21. Deliverance!!

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 03:35 PM

22. Maybe it's time to learn Danish as a second language n/t

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 04:02 PM

23. I almost feel like my life is on an auction block.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 08:17 PM

24. Fine by me.

The Danes know how to run a country.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:10 PM

25. Were that it were true

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Thu Aug 22, 2019, 10:55 PM

26. The punctuation is bad, but the message is great!

It took a lot of editing to make sense of this small article of sarcasm. But I loved it!

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Fri Aug 23, 2019, 12:58 AM

27. Okay!

I’m all for it if we can get rid of the MF and I can sign on th Denmark’s health plan.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Soph0571 (Original post)

Fri Aug 23, 2019, 01:52 AM

28. see also, "not enough Americans are packing heat"


Short range nuclear missiles made available to American public in bid to reduce gun crime

Following a series of atrocities in the United States over the weekend in which more than twenty five members of the public were shot and killed the government has announced dramatic reforms to curb the growing crisis.

“Obviously just letting everybody arm themselves to the teeth with conventional weapons hasn’t done the trick.” A spokesman for the US government told The Rochdale Herald.

“The real issue is that not enough Americans are packing heat when they go to the supermarket or the swimming baths. If they all were then obviously there’d be no gun crimes at all.”

“The next obvious step to take is to make short range nuclear weapons available over the counter at Best Buy and Walmart. If we want to ensure that members of the public are completely safe then we need to give them all access to even bigger weapon systems.”

[ ... ]
https://rochdaleherald.co.uk/2019/08/05/short-range-nuclear-missiles-available-to-american-public-in-bid-to-reduce-gun-crime/

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink

Reply to this thread