Broken: House Republicans Introduce New Immigration Bill
Watchington, July 30, 2018
New Republican Immigration Bill Will Solve Immigration Issue
by MineralMan
In an unsurprising move, half a dozen Republican "Freedom Caucus" members have introduced a fresh, new immigration bill to try to appeal to President Trump's desire to control the number of immigrants of certain types. Entitled the "Swarthy Immigrant Restriction Act," the new bill would impose strict limits on certain immigrant groups, while opening up "Chain" immigration to unlimited numbers of more acceptable immigrants, such as the parents of First Lady Melania Trump.
One of the co-authors of the House Bill, who requested anonymity, said, "We all know who should and should not be allowed to come to this country. Our bill puts it in writing so it's very clear. President Trump wants Norwegians and the like to be able to immigrate, but not some others. We want to help him achieve his goals." It should be noted that the "Swarthy Immigrant Restriction Act" does not specifically name the groups to be prevented from immigration but, instead, relies on common English to help immigration officials decide.
Reaction from Democratic House members was swift, and consisted of a flurry of statements reading, "WTF?" A tweet in support of the bill from Donald Trump is expected as soon as he wakes up from his afternoon nap.
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Note: For those who are unable to detect satire in posts on DU, this post is a satire. You can tell, because it has the MineralMan byline, the word "Broken" in the title, and is followed by the evilgrin emoticon
