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Thu Jul 12, 2018, 08:17 PM

Harriot: According to Forbes' Calculation I'm the Next Self Made Billionaire; Not Kylie Jenner


Forbes values Kylie Cosmetics at $800 million based on sales of $330 million in 2017. By comparison, last year, Avon Products generated $5.7 billion in revenue, but somehow using actual real-world math, the company is only valued at $1.5 billion. Furthermore, Avon manufactures many of its own products, while Kylie Cosmetics’ products are basically more expensive, rebranded products from Seed Beauty, which may or may not manufacture the products themselves.

So even if Kylie negotiated the best profit margin in the history of companies, it is hard for anyone with a logical business mind to believe that—after expenses—Kylie Cosmetics even made $100 million in profit. Avon’s profit on $5.7 billion in sales was $273 million dollars.


Last year, I sold a used treadmill on Craigslist for $100. I also brought in a few dollars from The Root and from outside projects. Using Forbes’ math, I have a thriving exercise empire conservatively worth $250 million dollars. All I need to do is sell 2.5 million more treadmills and I’m there!

I know part of Kylie Cosmetics’ valuation includes the fact that her last name is Jenner. But my first name is Michael. Like Jordan. Like Jackson. Like -angelo (Not the artist, the Mutant Ninja Turtle, who has also been rich since he was a teenager).


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