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Thu Jul 12, 2018, 12:45 PM

Dear Donald, Obama could hold his breath under water for 20 minutes



Obama could swim in the Alligator filled waters of South America and frequently would test his constitution by allowing himself to be stampeded by angry elephants while drafting legislation.

Feel free to expound DUers because there are so many other things Obama use to do that Trump could do better!

13 replies, 600 views

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Arrow 13 replies Author Time Post
Reply Dear Donald, Obama could hold his breath under water for 20 minutes (Original post)
Quixote1818 Jul 12 OP
The Blue Flower Jul 12 #1
niyad Jul 12 #8
LineReply .
NCTraveler Jul 12 #2
lame54 Jul 12 #3
lame54 Jul 12 #4
Quixote1818 Jul 12 #5
liberaltrucker Jul 12 #6
niyad Jul 12 #7
hlthe2b Jul 12 #9
niyad Jul 12 #10
kag Jul 12 #11
LastLiberal in PalmSprings Jul 12 #12
louis-t Jul 12 #13

Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 12:51 PM

1. Obama could run a 3-minute mile

While eating a cheeseburger.

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Response to The Blue Flower (Reply #1)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 01:37 PM

8. don't forget--while wearing a full pack like the military.

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 12:51 PM

2. .

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 12:52 PM

3. Citizen's United was Obama's idea

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 12:52 PM

4. Obama Loooooooves guns

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Response to lame54 (Reply #4)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 12:55 PM

5. YES!!!!!

Edit: Whoops, I meant that for the Citizens United one, but guns is good too.

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 01:24 PM

6. Obama was immune to cyanide.

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 01:37 PM

7. obama loves asbestos , does not believe in catastrophic climate change.

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 01:37 PM

9. and immediately after a really big high carb, high fat meal, 30 minutes!

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 01:40 PM

10. obama could jump out of planes without a parachute, and cave dive without gear.

this is fun!!

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 02:01 PM

11. Obama once walked a tightrope across the Grand Canyon!

It's true! I saw it. No net or anything. I bet you can't do that. In fact, I'll bet you a thousand dollars you can't do that. Hear that? I'll PAY YOU one thousand dollars...no, make that two thousand dollars...what the hell, THREE thousand dollars...to walk on a tightrope across the Grand Canyon*.







* Crossing point must be at least three hundred yards across (of course Obama crossed at a point where it was 500 yards, but we'll shorten it for you since you're...you know...fat. Also, no payment until AFTER you have completed the tightrope walk. You have to walk by yourself, no family members, Secret Service, SVR, or pretend lawyers allowed on the rope. The rope may be no wider than half the width of the widest part of your foot (don't worry about the math; we know those word problems are SO hard, but we'll take care of it. Also, we will do our best to find rope strong enough to hold your girth, though if your feet are closely proportional to your hands, it may be difficult; is dental floss strong?, glass fiber?, don't worry, we'll find something). We will, of course, have LOTS of cameras there, and we can make sure that your make-up is perfect, but give us time to find a foundation that won't blend in too much with the canyon walls. Since this footnote has become so long, we will understand if you opt not to read it, but we WILL hold you responsible for all of the provisions herein, whether or not it is signed by either party, and no matter what alias, nom-de-guerre, pseudonym, or nickname either party chooses to use.





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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 02:08 PM

12. When Obama takes his shirt off, women swoon. When Trump does it, everyone wretches.

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Response to Quixote1818 (Original post)

Thu Jul 12, 2018, 02:42 PM

13. Obama could look directly into the sun for 5 minutes.

Then walk on broken glass with no shoes.

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