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nightscanner59

Profile Information

Name: Johnathan
Gender: Male
Hometown: do I have a home?
Home country: USA
Current location: San Franciso Bay Area
Member since: Sun Aug 15, 2010, 04:05 PM
Number of posts: 625

About Me

As a 16 y.o. runaway from extreme peer bullying and parental neglect; specifically after being \"outed\" in a redneck town, it was one fat, boisterous idiot of a preacher who instrumented the lynch mob who literally \"ran me out of town\". This was precisely the hateful crap he was stirring that caused incidental mob mentality that I know nearly a whole certain town is horrified to look back upon. Fred Phelps himself was invited, and drove all the way there to head up this riot. It was like something out of a horror flick: invited to a \"party in my honor\", that was quickly revealed to be a hatefest, with Fred Phelps himself at the helm. From the moment I walked in the door he lit into an in-my-face spitting litany of my evils with family and community members teasing and touting \"praise cheezus\" all around. I left with a whole crowd chasing me down the street. I only stayed home long enough that evening to pack a backpack and head out, never to return. This was after many other pronounced anti-gay incidents that were escalating in severity. I\'ve spent my whole life attempting to live down that moment. If I could sue every one of the idiots who took part in that dipshit scenario I would not hesitate for one second. Odd conflict with me is, being very, very lucky to have run across a gay pedophile (if you will, he had more genuine humanitarian interest in getting me off the street than playing with my pee-pee) who sheltered, fed and street-schooled me till I was nearly 18. December 2009 I was doored off my bicycle in what was highly suspected as an anti-gay crime. Reason being I kept having drive by \"Faggot\" yelled at my home, then the same spray painted on it, within a couple months of this happening. I cannot identify my attackers. It came unexpectedly, so suddenly, and I was too dazed only to realized I was being repeatedly kicked in the head. It took a sort of hypnosis and drug enhanced therapy to recall what I could at a University PTSD study I participated in: but during that EMDR-like sessions I realized that I had been kicked in the head something on the order of 100 times by my attackers, I could smell strong whiskey and they were laughing and making homophobic comments. I\'m a radiologic technologist with over 20 years experience in CT and Xray. Unfortunately I have limitations to my physical ability to perform my chosen profession, due to pinched nerves in my neck. Insurance companies have rejected me for all plans. I have taken what Xray assignments I can. I\'m fortunate not to have lost most of my cognitive abilities, but I\'m not who I was before this occurence, by any long shot. I can no longer ride a bicycle or a motorcycle due to chronic dizziness. I\'ve had dozens of chronic ear infections since. My right eye still has a partially detached retina. I\'ve been opiate free for 6 months now, but still have some days I have trouble with old fractures. I am documented TBI case now basically multiple post concussive syndrome. I still want to work, and live much like I did before this happened but it is very difficult. I have difficulty sometimes forming sentences verbally in proper syntax, and have to go kind of slowly at this. I refuse to become dependent on SSDI though, because I still don\'t really have a home. I sold the house there in Arizona, still have some ranch property in Radiator Springs! But this fucked up all my plans for building a home there. Its still a campout. I\'ve finally paid off over 10,000 dollars worth of debt this attack caused me. State of Arizona refused me victims of crime compensation. (R) bastards. I\'m living on the edge of homelessness still. Only a few places have been understanding of my limitations, however, which are not severe, but ever present. I\'m hoping to go back to one of the best jobs I\'ve had, but things aren\'t as lucrative for rad techs as they were years ago. Albeit my past is bitter, has made some mediocrity seem sweet ever since.

Journal Archives

I'm going to bite at this, having had a personal experience

with the master of hate himself Fred Phelps. My family lived in a redneck community where I got outed. I had made the mistake of telling someone I thought was a close friend, at 14 years old, that when I grew up I wanted to marry another man.
Life went straight to shit for me from that day until I ran away from that hell at 16 for my own survival.
And Fred F@cking Phelps was part of the problem. As some of his extended family lived in the town I went to school, I was "invited to a party in my honor". I smelled a rat when my Phelps friend said his uncle wanted to meet and talk to me, but curiosity killed my cat. I went at the appointed time.
It was an absolute hate-fest. A ceremony of laughter and vile, idiotic and ritualistic derogatory "condemning my soul to hell". There was nothing even remotely "christian" about this gathering, to my remote understanding of it. Just Fred spitting in my face as he yelled about my being a child of satan at the top of his lungs as the family gathered all around chimed in with holy epithets. Needless to say I made my way out the door in less than a minute.
Fred Phelp's family also saw to it that my life at that school would become unbearable from then on. I cannot even count the times that "faggot" replaced my name. I had bruises, cuts and fractures from being pushed, kicked, hit, shoved, tripped and tortured daily. And as far as everyone in that town was concerned, the "city slicker" that their parents warned them all not to associate with became the devil himself to burn.
When I finally made it all the way to San Francisco, I found a freeway bridge to sleep out of the rain, and eat the damaged package of Lorna Doone cookies I'd dug out of a dumpster on the way. I was filthy, hungry, totally alone and felt as though I was the only one in the world like me, as far as I knew. To this day I don't know what drew me to go to San Francisco, but it turned out to be my lifesaver at the kindly hands of an aged pedophile who eventually took me in.
I contemplated suicide, Freds unholy words echoing to me, convinced that perhaps the world would do better without this "faggot".
No I cannot imagine how horrible a full Phelps upbrining would be, compared to my parents who neglected my needs, the abusive part probably would have left me hanging from a rope from a freeway overpass just south of here.
Posted by nightscanner59 | Sat Jun 27, 2015, 01:25 PM (2 replies)

I lost a job in California early 90's when corporate LGBT anti-discrimination was barely a glimmer

As well as one housing situation in late 80's Texas when a landlord made discovery of us two males inhabiting a one bedroom apartment.
More recently, and most disgustingly, was a rather blatant crusade by a new manager at a hospital I worked at in Arizona to rid our department of my gay self and one transgender individual. She succeeded, and I'll tell you why. The unapologetically greedy red streak of political Scroogery in Arizona has made draconian cuts to the EOC there. Our complaint was filed, only to get the response that only the most egregious of sexual harassment and gender pay discrepancy cases can be handled by the EOC that has been cut dramatically. They were apologetic that they could no longer protect anyone from practically anything else. I have since dropped my professional licensure in Arizona, and will never work there again until this turns around. To this day the parent corporation of that hospital, based in Memphis, Tennessee, still refuses to list LGBT as a protected class on their policies.
Texas is not the only state that will likely turn blue in a decade or so. Native Arizonans are getting really, really fed up with being shafted by these antediluvian crazies, but they have a problem with thousands of snowbirds that flock yearly to Arizona, and keep their voter registration there also so they can get to Quartzsite in time for the November "big event". It skews the whole picture far redder than it would be without them. Some elections would have swung the other way if it weren't for the retiree Fox-noise addicted hoardes that come from Idaho, Montana and the snowy likes.
And it makes me madder than hell to hear right wing f*cktards tell me my rights are not being violated. Especially when they vomit up their recent meme of "you are free to marry someone of the opposite sex just like everyone else". I used to fight this garbage on their own turf, right on their crazy red-meat sites such as Fox Nation.
Until I got banned there. Go figure...
Same town where my partner of the time and I got kicked out of our home, he went to interview at a new fast food restaurant called "Chick-Fil-A". Not only did the idiotic phonetic pronunciation of their name stand as a turn off, but my partner certainly did not spare any energy slamming the door on the way out from the interview, where he was asked personal questions about his sexuality as part of the interview process.
And the red-meat crowd wonders why we're militant.

Posted by nightscanner59 | Sat Jun 20, 2015, 07:46 PM (0 replies)

Comments and advice welcome: Re: bringing my gay pakistani friend to the U.S.

My friend who just turned adult age in Pakistan wants out... who can blame him? The tricky balance here is he does not want any of his family to know about his preferences, that could put them in danger even in his absence. I'm bringing him here on a visitor's visa then apply for asylum. He's also coming to check out City College's engineering program for a start in college. I've already made contact with a law firm who has had success in such cases.
I think we're doing this right under the circumstances. He is so living in fear there. It's strictly a platonic interest for me, myself being partially disabled he's willing to help me manage my home so I can keep working until we can get ourselves set up to support him in school. I know he'll need to take some ESL classes part time for a year or so before starting a serious program anyway, he's got basic english down albeit a bit broken and accented.
Resources are short for me, so I've had to take this one step at a time.
I'm not giving a lot of details here. I know there are some antediluvian lurkers around this site that would love to take the wrecking ball to our lives.
Posted by nightscanner59 | Wed Jun 17, 2015, 03:16 PM (3 replies)

Possible New and Improved Republican Presidential Contender!


It's Martin Crane's chair, and I'd say it stands a great chance of winning the nomination. It's dusty, moldy and presents no new ideas. It blew up the DirtScourge 2000 in the attempt to clean up it's outlook, just as it wants to do to other countries rather than negotiate. It's worn out, patched up with duct tape but oh so comfortable to the bigoted they just can't let it go. It sits there silently in it's refusal to update it's affect, which beats the one's who open their mouths with their antediluvian edicts and overt to covert avariciousness. It won't buy into the ACA nor oppose it just to appease the radical base.
Best parts are, MC's chair won't vote itself a pay raise, won't lower the taxes only for the extraordinarily affluent, won't oppose good policies just because the opposition party proposed them, won't drag us into endless and pointless wars. It won't oppose equal rights for LGBT or women, won't blather about "legitimate rape", it will leave Roe vs. Wade well enough alone and won't pander to the crazy far right religious insistence for special powers above all others. It won't oppose unions and other fair labor practices, it won't object vehemently to raising the minimum wage, nor pander to Fox News and Rupert Murdoch's slant even when it's on all the time in front of it. It won't implement policies that are great for the privileged yet discourage upward mobility of the middle class and poor. It won't cut vital services or rip off the social security fund you've paid dearly into for your retirement disguised as "privatization".
It won't call fast food workers "of satan" (SP), It won't say "I like to fire people". It won't ask "Is our children learning" (GWB), nor state: "Facts are stupid things" nor "Trees cause more pollution than automobiles" (RR). It won't call the gulf oil spill an "act of god" (RP), or claim: Ill be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office. (GWB). (author take a moment to ponder that one and huff his inhaler) It won't assuredly state: "Carbon Dioxide (isn't) a harmful gas" (MB). It won't say: "The Great Flood is an example of climate change. And that certainly wasn't because mankind overdeveloped hydrocarbon energy." (JB) nor "It is not the role of the Congress to make college affordable and accessible." (VF). It will restore faith in government better than (RJ): "When I hear politicians talk about restoring faith in government . . . No, no, no, no, no. That is the wrong solution!" It won't make asinine false comparisons like: "Forty years ago, the United States Supreme Court sanctioned abortion on
demand. And we wonder why our culture sees school shootings so often."(KC). It won't make purely political, actual job-disregarding directives such as: "Everything we do in this body should be about messaging to win back the Senate. That's it." (PS) or "The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president." (MM). It won't say "We're not preaching austerity" (PR) while proposing the most austere budget proposal imaginable. It won't say "We've done our work" (JB) in defense of the most unproductive legislative session in the entire congressional history. It won't campaign on blindingly odd statements such as "The middle class. Since when in America do we have classes? That's Marxism talk." (RS), nor respond "Yes, I would" (JW) when asked if he would restore slavery in America.
Yes, Martin Crane's chair, in comparison to the gaffe-spouters would appear a pinnacle of intellect with it's mute discourse and demure demeanor. It was beloved by a lovable if old-fashioned and crotchety curmudgeon, despite it's plebian nature and assuredly unassuming decor. It's a good speculation it will have less face-palmingly ignorant gaffes than many of the candidates to come, and it won't mind or have you arrested if you spill beer or ketchup on it.
Posted by nightscanner59 | Thu Apr 23, 2015, 11:30 PM (0 replies)

"Bullets to the Head". "Christian" extremist's answer to gays.

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Posted by nightscanner59 | Thu Mar 12, 2015, 05:57 PM (13 replies)

The radical right wingers over the top now.

For a couple years now I've been placing progressive viewpoint on one of the RW stealth sites called SodaHead. The rhetoric there has very nearly degenerated into more and more Obama-hate, angry discourse festering into what I read today. There are RW'ers now eluding to suggestions of armed revolution due to totally wacked out ideas they've convinced themselves of. Some have come very, very close to making direct threats on the life and health of our commander in chief!!!
When I gain full internet again I'll post links. They've truly gone nuts in there and it bears watching, fellow DU'ers. For now I'll just snap out this link:
www.sodahead.com
'Cause it won't take anyone long to find the crazy stuff they're posting there!
Posted by nightscanner59 | Sun Aug 24, 2014, 03:04 AM (6 replies)

Minor aggravating situation...

I just left the local dog park rather expediently due to a family with two pit bulls there. Nice calm pits, but right after the owner let the dog off the leash, he came to me and I petted his head. Then the dog turned around... and there was a clear cut case of ringworm, several perfectly round balding spots. Aaaaak.
I attempted to make a tactful comment to the owner only to a "no speekee english" response.
I proceeded right home, took Caleb and I directly to shower for a strong permethrin bath, shed my clothes right there and soaked them in the shower floor with the permethrin soap as well. I'll hit the car with Lysol later.
On the way home, though I stopped to call animal control. Actually the dispatcher first retorted to me something the order of "This is a veterinary situation sir, we take stray dog calls" (Grrr.) Upon mention of the highly contagious nature of ringworm, she said she'd send and officer right out.
Advice, comments welcome.
Posted by nightscanner59 | Sat Aug 23, 2014, 04:43 PM (8 replies)

Despite how far we've come we still live in the dark ages.

I read with heavy heart about yet another bakery refusing to serve a gay couple. I put the following on a poll site just a couple hours ago:
http://www.sodahead.com/living/straights-only-should-be-displayed-prominently/question-4451959/
The flood of asinine homophobic BS in responses is already distressing.
I'm serious. If these bigots are going to hold their moral yardstick up to customers to serve them, they should have to warn everyone of their scruples.
Posted by nightscanner59 | Thu Aug 14, 2014, 09:19 PM (3 replies)

Albeit only remotely connected to my LGBT status, I"m finally glad to leave the midwest.

I've been on a 6 month inteventional mission to my elderly parents self destructive wind-down. Got the worst problem placed in nursing home care, set up home care and meals on wheels for mom. I also considered this sort of a depraved sabbatical for myself after severe injuries sustained in a brutal mugging just over 4 years ago.
But frankly even going to a "red" area of california for work now has desirability over this. Between the load of hateful bumperstickers sighted daily, and Fox Noose delusional Zombies driving hundreds of monster pickemuptrucks complete with smokestacks to ensure as much carbon pollutant effluent into yet still relatively pristine air to drive one fat ass and one bag of groceries 30 miles round to work... cough, cough,... as the "one man, one woman" bumpersticker cuts a stinky self righteous fart on my "Love conquers hate" equality flag.
There still, but never see the ratio of this beyond that california border. Ever.
Yet I leave here with the most disturbing thought. That the likes of my mom exist in this area where the media pounds in all kinds of "drive your fucking cars to hell, burn more fuel in the name of X oil company's "good deeds" *coughing more*" but look at all those terrible faggots wrecking our way of life!!!!" televised brainwashing that still has her 87 year old brain convinced it is still post-WWII, and the repugs will save us all from tyranny. No amount of reality will soak her delusional soul, evidence from practically every major university and reliable institute of higher learning, even albeit a product of one, The oceans radical change in pH, nothing soaks because the box has her convinced to vote for the likes of Newt fuckwad Gingrich or whatever red one runs. I assure you the televisionus mesmerizing rays do not enter my own home, haven't since RayGun totally deleveled that playground, and never will in the unwilling and pervasive fashion it bombards and sickens me with on nearly a daily basis when intervening with my mom's problems.
Yet it stirs so much anger at the Kock brothers, and other 1 percenter's efforts to cause this. The number of misinformed, delusional or downright militant hoardes are just palpable here in a way that disturbs my dreams. Tomorrow I leave it behind me in my rear view mirror. Hare Krishna, Hare Rama. Namaste.
Posted by nightscanner59 | Wed Feb 12, 2014, 08:59 AM (2 replies)

Finally, thanks to the ACA implementation, the ancillary medical job market is thriving again. BUT..

Shocked, I tells ya, shocked many of my patients would be to find out how much of my life has been spent by this caregiver sleeping on park benches as a student, and my car when the damn repugnants control our government offices and wrecks the job market.
I'm 54 years old now, and not able to physically handle these economic downswings upon which my travel job is dependent. Since this last period of unemployment, despite having a good financial resume until shortly after the GWB years, my health has suffered, I have no retirement funds or even a hope to be able to save up one again thanks to the long unemployment periods I've had between job assignments and still retire at the age of 64 I had planned on.
Thanks to my republican parents who are reaping now what they have sowed over the years for non-support of their gay son since 16 years of age since I ran away from them to survive on the streets, the financial fluctuations I've experienced for myself with the tide of economic conditions and employment availability, This last stretch of austerity I've had to live through has been a devastating one. I don't bounce back as easily as I did, health-wise or financially from scraping for every penny between jobs.
2016 is truly going to be a turning point for me should any REPUGlican control happen again. I cannot survive another period like the GWB years and after, period. I will give up my whole life's plan, sell my home and maybe move to Sao Paulo. I'm working on learning Portuguese just in case.
Sorry if sometimes I'm redundant in my thoughts here. Finally, I'm going back to work soon, and maybe able to get back on track. But with my life and retirement plans totally blown, no possibility now of recovering ability to retire at 64 as planned, still only now have an empty piece of property with no home on it thanx to this, I can't even think straight anymore. I certainly have learned a hard lesson, and most certainly will take whatever money I can save over the next couple years, revoke my U.S. citizenry, sell my home and move out of the U.S. should any republican control like the GWB years happen again.
Frankly, the more I look at Sao Paolo and other places along the Brazilian coast, nationalized heathcare for citizenry there...
Posted by nightscanner59 | Fri Jan 24, 2014, 10:13 AM (5 replies)
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