Ashton Kutchner fears the apocalypse

[cowcommander]

Ashton Kutcher is getting toned and tough - so he can fend for himself and look after his family following an Armageddon-type crisis. The movie star and producer, who is married to health nut Demi Moore, fears a major U.S. energy meltdown is nigh and he's trying to get superfit so he can deal with the chaos that will follow a blackout or worse.

Kutcher discovered combat training Krav Maga last year as he prepared to tone up for his role in Killers and now he's obsessed with running, Bikram yoga and Muay Thai fighting with the French national champion - and he insists he's committed to his extreme workouts, so he can dominate in desperate times. The 32 year old tells Men's Fitness magazine, "It will not take much for people to hit the panic button. The amount of convenience that people rely on based on electricity alone. You start taking out electricity and satellites, and people are going to lose their noodle.

"And people are going to go, 'That land's not yours, prove that it's yours,' and the only thing you have to prove it's yours is on an electronic file... People's alarm systems at their homes will no longer work, Neither will our heating, our garbage disposals, hot-water heaters that run on gas but depend on electricity.

"What happens when all our modern conveniences fail? I'm going to be ready to take myself and my family to a safe place where they don't have to worry... All of my physical fitness regimen is completely tailored around the end... I stay fit for no other reason than to save the people I care about."

And he admits he tasted what life could be like after a major national or international calamity when he, Moore and her kids were left without power for 14 hours at their mountain cabin last Christmas. He adds, "I got my guns out. We made a fire. We went to the grocery store... People were rolling in and out, clearing out all the shelves... It was like a preview."

http://www.torontosun.com/entertainment/celebrities/2010/12/28/16692341-wenn-story.html

[Ken Burch]

1. Uh, Ashton, dude...six-pack abs won't help anybody in the Last Days...

...just sayin'...

[RKP5637]

9. +1, n/t

[cali]

11. .......

:rofl:

[blondeatlast]

18. They'll look good silhouetted against blood-red skies, though. Is it AK's fault

no one will be around to appreciate that, though?

:rofl:

[Ken Burch]

28. Actually yes....

It was written in a long-deleted section of Revelations:

"And it shall be,that when a no-brained dude, Ashton, called Kelso, shall appear among them on a Show said to be from the 70's, yet which is not, that the End of Times will be upon us..."

[blondeatlast]

31. That my damned ex got me to sit through an entire episode of that dreck

was one of the first Revelations.

[girl gone mad]

29. They would definitely be a nice distraction..

and I think Demi would agree that's very helpful.

[Cleita]

2. Being without electricity for long periods of time

in rural Idaho (which is where they live) isn't that unusual. I think it's a little publicity BS he's trying. DH and I once went a week without it until the power company could fix things.

[phasma ex machina]

3. Stuff the Rambo crap. Self sufficient communes work best in times of zombie apocalypse. nt

[whoneedstickets]

6. Exactly, skip Krav Maga -- learn to do your own canning

The key off the grid skills have less to do with loading your own ammunition than with growing enough vitamin C bearing food to avoid scurvy.

[Ken Burch]

15. And when the zombies get close, smear yourself with dead people slime

like they do on that tv show.

Since you'll smell dead, the zombies will leave you alive(although you may not WANT to be if you have to smell like that every day).

[Mojorabbit]

44. Yep ,need community to survive the apocalypse. nt

[Codeine]

4. I think Men's Fitness Magazine

just got punk'd.

[Hassin Bin Sober]

10. Me thinks you are correct.

[MindPilot]

5. I do too. I also fear Satan and Freddie Kruger.

However I tend to focus much more on scary things that might actually exist...like car crashes and heart attacks.

[stevedeshazer]

7. Time to alert the media!

Oh, wait....

[Hassin Bin Sober]

8. All that money and he plans on fighting hand-to-hand?

How 'bout some high walls, generators, large food stash and lots of weapons.

[Forkboy]

12. I have images of the zombies overtaking the rich compound from World War Z.

One of the funniest parts of the whole novel. :)

[Pavulon]

22. Fuck Yeah. One can disagree on many points but zombies are a

something we should all find common ground on... Who can bear a gold plated german sub machine

gun with an integral suppressor..

[Permanut]

13. Here's an idea, Ashton...

Go to your safe place now. We'll send word when it's safe for you to come out.

[NNN0LHI]

14. Demi sure knows how to pick em doesn't she?

[Dappleganger]

25. Well that's the trade-off for eye candy these days.

[Canuckistanian]

16. Uh...

He DOES realize that he'll be one of the first ones eaten if the food supplies go bad, doesn't he?

And "ripped abs" are no protection from pieces of lead flying at near-supersonic speeds.

[Pavulon]

17. If you need a gun 14 hours into a power outage you may want to move...

note the low brass birdshot.

[Dappleganger]

24. Damn straight!

The boy needs to change neighborhoods if it's that bad in less than a day.

[Maru Kitteh]

19. OH MY GOD! 14 whole HOURS without electricity? What a brave man.

Yeah, he's totally ready for the apocalypse.

Unbelievable.

[kestrel91316]

20. He got guns out because of a power failure that lasted half a day???

What a pansy.

We had power failures on several occasions when I was growing up, some in snowy cold conditions, and my dad never got his guns out. And after the Northridge earthquake when many were without power for a week or more (and myself for 24 hours), guns didn't seem to be necessary in the least.

The kid's been watching too many bad movies.

[blondeatlast]

34. Your last line is soooo very ripe for jokes I don't even know where to begin.

But damn, I can resist anything but temptation.

Striptease, The Seventh Sign, The Butterfly effect...

[Tunkamerica]

21. you spelled his name wrong.

[Dappleganger]

23. The boy hasn't a fucking clue...

14 hours w/out electricity, ROFL!!

Try 7 days after a major hurricane or even worse, after a storm like Katrina. Then give us a call and let us know just how being "fit" kept you fed, high and dry.

[underpants]

26. Demi may have actually .... his brains out

Oh to be Ashton

[peacefreak]

27. Ashton, honey...

time to get out of Idaho for awhile.

[tallahasseedem]

30. I would rather face armageddon then watch...

one of Kutcher's "movies."

[blondeatlast]

32. This promises to be one of the best DU threads ever. Every response a

giggle so far.

Bookmarked.

[WCGreen]

33. Movie Star....

Dude, where's the Reality.

[progressoid]

35. Yet another reason for me to ignore this douche.

[Zax2me]

36. Narcissism

Can lead people to think they are the only ones to see tough times, or potential disasters ahead.
The end of days is always going to be on MY time-clock.
Not the generation ahead of me.
Or 1,000 ahead of me.
It's going to hit ME.

[apocalypsehow]

37. I never liked his movies anyway. n/t.

[Pancho Sanza]

38. He's stuck in that 70 (I.Q.)s show...

:eyes:

[BobTheSubgenius]

39. My power goes out every night.

Seven or eight hours at a time. At least, it's very dark if wake up during that time, so the power COULD be out.

So far, I'm bearing up.

Idiot, Ashton. Idiot.

[Stevenmarc]

40. LOL So someone got all the Evian at an Aspen supermarket and he's experienced the apocalypse

[Maru Kitteh]

43. :-)

[treestar]

41. He hasn't left her yet?

She must be close to 50!

Sounds like a lunatic.

[PufPuf23]

42. I enjoy Kutchner but he is clueless

My power went out just today and usually the power is out 2 or so weeks each winter. There is a 40 mile dead zone between PG&E and Pacific Power 8 miles north. We did not have telephones until 1973 after I was out of HS in 1971. There is still no cell phone access and TV and internet is by satelite dish or telephone modem. My propane generator for now is automatic - even emails me when there is a maintenance need. There are still villages nearby without power or telephones, one would thinka good infrastructure project -- actually I have friends on Inidan Allotments that have no power nor phone yet the broad band cable from Oregan to California was installed under the county highway that crosses their allotment.

My parents grew up when the only freight and transportation access was by mule rain, horse or foot and I grew up with that and the Depression ethic as far as self sufficiency.

I am a wimp since I educated and worked urban corporate, academic and Fed until retreating home 2002-2003 but watched my parents and grandparents. I can live off the forest and like my garden and could raise livestock (as my childhood) and have water.

My physical resources are fine (have water, farmland, and timber) but my health and liquid cash put me at risk. I depend on the children of friends of my childhood for some basic needs.