I feel like my current financial situation is turning me into a dick.

[Buddyblazon]

Don't get me wrong. I have a job. I'm greatly appreciative of that. However...I'm greatly UNDER employed.

I am just not giving my time to "lackeys" in my industry (I work in concert production)....or doing them favors (like free tickets) unless they are willing to reimburse me.

An asshole for the "other" major promoter in town that has the ability to give me work (but doesn't) just texted me to get his niece into a show on Saturday. He's done this dozens of times, and NEVER once returned the favor.

So I texted back to him, "I'll get her into the show...in exchange for one day of work.". After an hour of silence, he came back with, "Sure".

I'm just sick of it. I'm sick of taking one for the team where they dangle a carrot in front of me for years and tell me, "If you're really good, you'll be taken care of.".

Well...I've been good. Really REALLY good. After 11 1/2 years of being "good" they gave me the stage manager position in one of their major venues. So I've been "really really good" as the stage manager for 3 1/2 years. I've gotten one pittance of a raise...though it only evens out the pay decrease they gave me a couple months after taking the position. "You can take it or quit.", they told me. So I took it.

With my pittance of a raise...they paid me $16,900 last year. Forget that my allegiance is to them and has been for over a decade. Forget that my current position keeps me from going on the road (if I want to keep the position) where I can make real money. 15 years I've been doing this. My ind. gigs brought my income up a bit. But not much. Certainly not enough for my wife and I to finally start a family (she turned 38 last week...the clock is counting down).

I feel like a fucking schmuck.

Corporations man. They've ruined my industry. They've ruined this country. We are no longer human beings. We are fucking numbers. And when you look at a number on a spreadsheet...that number doesn't have a family. There is no life or death for that number. That number has no responsibility.

I'm done with just helping people and companies that are just going to fuck me. But they know...my other choice is going on the road where I'll be away from my family. I'm too dam old to go back to being a Roadie.

So over our situation. Especially knowing there is nothing I can do. Sure. I can quit. To do what? Go work for the other corporate promoter in town that will do the same exact thing?

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. I read your post, and I feel so helpless.

I cannot help you, not even a little bit. But somehow, knowing what you're going through makes me part of it. Call it poetic license, or foolishness, still I feel what you're feeling.

Your writing has power.

I am so sorry...

Recommended.

:hug:

[femrap]

8. You always know what to

say, CA Peggy.

Life in the US of A sucks today. We're living The Decline of the American Empire. Eventually, we'll all agree to say 'Enough.' But I have no idea when that will occur.

I wish all could stay away from such toxic employers and co-workers...but it is nearly impossible.

Maybe what 'some' are saying is true...the poles will shift and we won't have a damn thing to worry about...and that could might just be a relief. Who knows?

[CaliforniaPeggy]

10. Thank you, my dear femrap...

Looks to me as though you're doing pretty well in what you're saying too...:hug:

[Buddyblazon]

12. And YOU, my lovely Peggy...

have donated a star for me when I was down.

I want to thank you and tell you what a wonderful person I think you are.

If you're ever in Denver and want to go to a show...hit me up. I owe you.

[Buddyblazon]

13. AND...

you just did it again.

Peggy...you truly are a caring, giving soul. If our country was filled with Peggy's...none of these problems would exist.

Three cheers for Peggy:

HIP HIP

Hooray!

HIP HIP

Hooray!

HIP HIP

Hooray!!!!!!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

15. Aw...you're welcome...

I hate to see my friends down when I can do something, even something small, to help...

Thank you!

[GReedDiamond]

2. I hear ya...

...it sucks to be the musicians, too. Especially if you're doing original, independent stuff with little to no $$ for real marketing and promotion.

And speaking of old, thirty+ years of this shit and I have little motivation to play outside of the recording studio environment.

Whatever you do, I know you'll do what's right for yourself and your family, Buddyblazon.

Best wishes.

[GreenStormCloud]

3. That's barely above minimum wage.

A cashier at a convenience store makes that much and doesn't have the responsibility. Start looking for a different profession. Even a security guard with a good company makes more and has benefits.

[Sirveri]

6. In this economy good luck finding that security guard or cashier job.

That's the real problem here. Had a buddy that owns a pizza shop, opened a new location, was going to hire three waiters, got 1000 applicants, many of which had college degrees. He said the one that stood out was the guy who had a masters in astrophysics or something like that.

[Buddyblazon]

7. I love my job though.

The work part of it...being non-Union...but having the respect and friendship of my union crew. The people I command in my industry love me....and I love them in return. I make my corporation look good by the way I treat stagehands in this industry.

I've waited years and years for this. All my eggs are in this basket. This is what I know how to do. I've filled myself with years knowledge in order to make the stages I work on safer...more pleasurable to work on...and more pleasurable to perform on.

The spiritual reward I get is very high. But the monetary reimbursement is overriding that.

The thought of not doing what I've been doing this long is emotionally devastating. I CHOSE this. I've spent the last 15 years of my life at learning all the ins and outs. Driven semis for the industry. Climbed and rigged for the industry. Ruined my feet for my industry. Doing anything else would be soul crushing. I tried it. I was miserable.

I just want recognition. I want reimbursement for the time I've invested. I played by their fucking rules. I've played by societies fucking rules. I am in a position that literally, if someone got hurt seriously on a stage I was managing...my career would be over. I would be drummed out of my industry.

And this is how they repay me.

So now I'm just going to be the underhanded douchebag in my industry that I've hated for 15 years. They may be douchebags. But most of them are actually making their worth.

What a radical concept:

Being paid your worth.

[Carni]

31. You have an owner's mentality

But good luck getting paid for that... being a "worker" for some other asshole.

Yes, that sucks to infinity (familiar with that scenario BTW)

Is there any way you can get backing to strike out on your own?

[Buddyblazon]

33. There is a lot more money on the road...

however...if you want to destroy a marriage...one of the best ways to do it is to go away from your wife for months on end. Many roadies have trails of failed relationships. Not all...but even for the ones that make it work, it just not great for the relationship.

And all my backing wants me to back on the road.

The other bad part about going on the road is that it's impossible to get off the road. You generally lose your solid work at home, so the longer you're out, the harder it becomes to get off the road and step back into a local gig.

And in our industry, it takes years of waiting to get the high paying gigs at home. Eventually...HOPEFULLY...you finally get a high paying gig at home and your set to retirement. Unfortunately it just takes YEARS (usually but not always) of working at home to get one of those gigs.

That's what I'm holding out for. I'm really in a position where the next promotion will mean one of those high paying gigs. However, waiting to get up that last step itself can take years.

So I have attempted to remain upbeat at work all these years assuring myself that I was one promotion a way. I'm just beginning to get very cynical and that makes me even more upset.

[Carni]

34. On the road thing would definitely be a marriage downer

That sucks!

[Maru Kitteh]

4. If you want a baby DO IT NOW. Do not wait for the "right" time. Do it now.

Screw all the rest of it. If you wait till everything is just right she will die childless with resentments and regrets. Nothing is worth that. Have the baby.

[Webster Green]

5. I can certainly relate to your situation.

I was stage manager for major concert venues and promoters in Washington DC back in the 70s. I also worked as a roadie on national tours, doing PA, stage lighting, band tech, truck driver and production manager at various times.

My main beef was that I never could get an IATSE card, though I often worked under the auspices of the union and got union scale, I could never get a union card. It was so tight that if your dad wasn't a member, you were shit out of luck.

Alas, I'm also way too old to go on the road again. Too many fucking 22 hour days. It was a blast though. Every bit as wild and crazy as everyone has heard, and then some.

I've been working as a chimney sweep for the last 5 years. Pretty good money, but it's seasonal. I used to do boat repairs in the off season (summer), but that industry is really fucked these days. The boats I worked on were luxury items and gas guzzlers on top of that.

Anyway, I just wanted to give you a little support from someone who did the exact same stuff you are doing. Best of luck to you! :hi:

[Buddyblazon]

17. BTW...

Webster. Wages in our industry have stagnated over the last decade and a half...just about the time I started in the industry.

Now we have these young kids coming out of these production "schools" like Full Sail willing to work on tours for $100 a day.

When i meet these young guys, I make it clear to them, "YOU are part of the problem. YOU, instead of paying your dues and working your way up the way you're supposed to, are undercutting experienced people in our industry in order to jump to the front of the line. As a group, you guys that do this have lowered the pay scale for everybody in the industry. What you have done is basically sign all our death warrants.".

Doesn't much matter though. They look at me as if to say, "Whatever old man. I'm on the road. You aren't.".

[Webster Green]

18. Damn.

I hope you get your card! :thumbsup:

[MilesColtrane]

9. Unionize...Organize

http://www.stagemanagers.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=82&Itemid=65

[Buddyblazon]

11. i've sent several emails to that organization.

I've gotten no return correspondence from them. Nothing.

To the other ex-stage manager:

I also fill in at the venue around the corner that's owned by the "other" promoter. And there...you're a stagehand first. Once doors open, you become the stage manager.

Well, they're unionizing. It looks like I'll be a part of the core group...and if they can get around the semantics of "manager" (not a traditional stage manager position in that house)...then there is a good chance I'll get my card. Really excited about that. I should know on Monday whether I and the other stage managers there will get our cards.

And it doesn't effect my stage manager position in my house (because it's a union house, I'm truly management and have to be hands off). The Union is REALLY excited about getting me on board. The ass kissing I'm receiving from them is something I've never experienced. I've got officers in the Union I've never met calling me to tell me how my coming to meetings has really put life into their crew to do this...and they keep thanking me.

Lord...I hope I get my card. That could be the life changer.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

14. I really hope you get that card!

And I just gave you something else...

Hope you enjoy!

:hug:

[MilesColtrane]

16. Good luck!

[pa28]

19. As Larry David said. "I'm out of the helping business".

I've done the same thing with some of my clients from the fat days of 2007 and before who whine about concessions and don't realize the world has changed.

[handmade34]

20. I'm sorry...

:hug: You're not a number...


...they HAVE ruined our country... but don't let them do it to you. I'm not in the music industry but have had to be on the road (50 weeks out of the year, 24-7) the past 6 years to get by - no way to live!

[Juche]

21. Welcome to my world

I am a temp and work in a building with about 150 or so employees. If they need to cut any fat it comes from the ten or so of us who are temps.

But we get no benefits, work less hours and get paid less per hour. On an annual basis I think we temps make 1/4 what the real employees make when you factor in higher pay, longer hours and benefits. What we do is largely the same, but for 1/4 the money.

But they won't cut the benefits of the real employees, or deny them bonuses and raises. Instead they will cut fat from us even though you can't live with dignity on the wages they offer.

I find myself becoming more and more filled with rage and bitterness about my job situation. I know I'm not alone.

[Doctor_J]

22. Here's a take from a SLIGHTLY higher rung

I am well-employed, certainly not wealthy, middle-aged. I live and work in a poor, yet teabagger-filthy area (hate radio and Fox News run things around here). Recently we got a plea from our HR director to raise our United Way contributions due to the dire circumstances nearby. I understand it, but it strikes me as counterproductive, asking for help for the poor from the working class instead of the ones who have disposable income. There is this nagging feeling that we should let the whole thing collapse so the downtrodden who still vote Repuke will wake the hell up.

[bobbolink]

23. Yes, when you develop a spine and say BASTA!, you find out who your real friends are,

and who just uses you, and who never gave a damn to begin with.

That separation anxiety is hard to bear, but after a while the fear lessens, and you find yourself taking the slings and arrows without worrying who is being "offended".

Be good to yourself, and most importantly, join with those others of us who are deeply in pain.

[rucky]

24. Look for a similar position in another part of the country.

you don't have to take a job there, but it could give you leverage to go back to your boss if there's a better offer someplace else.

Just a thought.

[Shagbark Hickory]

25. Don't confuse feeling unappreciated with being a dick.

Or a "fucking schmuck," as you put it.

When someone asks for favors, can you just say "they've been cracking down on that, and I can get in trouble if I do." ?

[Buddyblazon]

26. I could...

now I just tell them to fuck off.

Lol.


Just to let you know...being a stage manager for years...you have no problem telling people to f' off. It actually becomes enjoyable after a while. I wish everybody could feel the same freedom.

I've yelled at rock stars. Hehe.

[Shagbark Hickory]

29. So now it sounds like you quite love your job and are in fact being a dick.

[Buddyblazon]

30. Well...

I should elaborate. A stage manager is basically a professional asshole. Seriously. I attempt to not approach it as an asshole...but as a diplomat first. However, if you lack the fortitude to drop the hammer on someone...your career as a stage manager will consist of you and your venue getting run over...and the venue will fire you.

They hire you to say the things that need to be said to people...but they're to scared to say it themselves.

But like I said, I'm a diplomat first. But you can't let tours mistake your kindness for weakness. Otherwise, everybodies day will be miserable.

[drmeow]

27. You are not being a dick

you are asserting yourself and protecting yourself from further exploitation. Standing up for yourself and not letting people take advantage of you is not being a dick ... the people who are dicks are the ones taking advantage of you.

[CrispyQ]

28. The corporate state is diminishing our humanity.

I see it all around me - zombie people so absorbed in their own lives that they have no awareness of people around them. Spend 15 minuets in a grocery store & you'll encounter it multiple times. There is very little sense of community - it's all me, me, me.

[Initech]

32. I'm the same way. No matter how much I put in, I get nothing back.

It is getting to be seriously fucking frustrating. I know exactly how you feel.