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How old is too old to have kids? 50+ year old pregnant woman on cover on NY mag

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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:29 PM
Original message
How old is too old to have kids? 50+ year old pregnant woman on cover on NY mag
I think the woman is at least 60

How old is too old to have kids?



A naked pregnant woman appears on the cover of this months New York magazine. She proudly shows off motherhood in the famous Demi Moore pose, one hand curved over her breasts, the other cradling her swollen belly.

But this mom-to-be doesnt have flawless skin or dark brown hair as the Hollywood actress did when she bared all on the cover of Vanity Fair in 1991. This womans skin is wrinkly and her hair silvery gray. Shes over 50 years old, and her pregnant belly is enormous.

Shocking? Maybe, not so much. Women are waiting to have babies these days. We all have a friend or a friend of a friend who gave birth at 45 or 50 or even older. We read about the British woman who got pregnant at 66 and saw the photos of a pregnant 47-year-old Kelly Preston (though she looked as if she could have been 37).

New York magazine tackles this trend and proves that it isnt only based on anecdotes. Theres all sorts of data to support it. The average age of a first-time mom is rising. In the U.S. its gone up from 21 to 25 since 1970. In New York State its 27. Whats more, while birthrates have gone down by 4 percent among women overall, theyve risen by 17 percent among women ages 45 to 49.

The story focuses on women who are 50ish and thanks to advances in reproductive technology its all very possible to get pregnant even if youre in the midst of menopause.

http://blog.sfgate.com/sfmoms/2011/09/28/how-old-is-too...
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msongs Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:30 PM
Response to Original message
1. if you can PAY for them, support them, and love them, age is not an issue nt
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ZombieHorde Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:00 PM
Response to Reply #1
40. Is pay more important than support and love? It is the only word with caps in your whole post.
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 04:02 PM by ZombieHorde
Not even the first letter of the first word is capitalized.

If a woman can not pay for her child, should she get an abortion? What if she can't afford an abortion either?
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:33 PM
Response to Reply #40
105. if you're 50, it is, because you won't be there to support them and love them very long
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 08:34 PM by pitohui
only leaving them the money matters, you won't be there to be a grandparent or to be a presence in any real sense when they need guidance in adulthood

many will die while the child is still a child and having seen what the death of a father does to a child in the 8 to 15 year old age range (having had many friends this happens to) i don't even want to think of what losing a mother that young will do

20 years goes by in a minute which is how these 50 year olds got in the fix of not having a child until 50 in the first place, instead of being an adult about it, they don't care if what they're doing cheats the child of a full relationship throughout time
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Kurmudgeon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:44 PM
Response to Reply #1
56. Age is not an issue, conceiving a baby then carrying them to term and have the child be healthy is.
Do what you wish with your body, however, use a little common sense too.
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DebJ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:07 AM
Response to Reply #56
124. I don't think the child whose mother dies at age 65 would
Edited on Thu Sep-29-11 12:08 AM by DebJ
be quite so agreeable to that. I can't imagine being only 20 or 25 and facing what I face today with my aging parents. You aren't even set yourself by any means in life yet, and you know you will be losing your parents, or having to help them with their daily life or medical cares. Wow. What a burden.

Thank God my parents have been here to support and guide me throughout the later years of my life. There is no one like Mom and Dad to answer your call as you work through life.

My Mom was 28 when I was born. I was 23 when my daughter was born (and yep, too young, really!). My own daughter waited until 30, and now I realize I might not be around to see my grandson's his high school graduation, and that makes me very, very sad, for both of us. I didn't have any Grandpa's left when I was an adult, and boy, I have always felt that loss.

But I grew up in a society where family was important.
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 08:55 AM
Response to Reply #1
134. As someone who lost a parent when she was young - that's something difficult to deal with
Mind you - parents can die at any age, my dad was only 41.

But the older you get your chances of dying increase which means there is a good chance that child will be without at least 1 parent by the time he/she graduates high school.

But you are right - if they have the ability to pay for it and raise it, it's their choice. I just think it's a poor choice.
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yawnmaster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:30 PM
Response to Original message
2. As old as they want. eom
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:31 PM
Response to Original message
3. i am not seeing a cover of 50 and over men asking if too old. and ya
not optimal with 50 yr old male sperm either.
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:33 PM
Response to Reply #3
7. true enough. Recent studies show sperm of older males not optimal
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Warren DeMontague Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:42 PM
Original message
No, but there are some pretty clear bio-differences between fatherhood at 50 & motherhood.
I mean, that's a simple biological fact, no bias implied or intended.

That said, I'm tired of the national obsession over finger-wagging busybodies telling other people how to live their personal lives, what to watch, what to wear, what to eat, what to listen to. I'm busy enough running my own damn life, I don't need or want to run yours.

If this lady wants to do it and has a good OB-GYN, that's her call.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:44 PM
Response to Original message
24. .
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 04:10 PM by seabeyond
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:03 PM
Response to Original message
44. genetic disorders, achondroplasia, schizophrenia, apert syndrome. lower iq.
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 04:10 PM by seabeyond
more chance of miscarriages,


http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/44641.php

equally, neither are optimal
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Warren DeMontague Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:34 PM
Response to Reply #44
71. No, neither are optional.
But I'm still across-the-board pro choice. I'm not going to condemn this woman.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:44 PM
Response to Reply #71
93. i wouldnt either.
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 07:03 PM by seabeyond
firstly, none of my business. but secondly, i had kids when i was older. (not that old). i see advantages. and i am sure she will be smart enough to address the issues that comes her and the childs way.
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Warren DeMontague Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 11:53 PM
Response to Reply #93
123. I meant optimal
but you get my drift. Like you, I waited until I was a bit older before becoming a parent. My energy quotient is lower, but my responsibility quotient is much higher.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 09:24 AM
Response to Reply #123
138. btw.... i have not made the point, that i feel strongly about
if you are older, i am not suggesting results will be a child with defiencies. merely odds go up. we all play the odds.

when i was preg at 35, and having baby at 36 that made all the difference of being tested for down syndrome. handful of months early and the suggestion would not have even been made. who is going to not have a baby because the risks are higher, but still.... pretty low.
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Warren DeMontague Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:14 PM
Response to Reply #138
144. Yeah, we had to do that additional testing with our 2nd, as well.
Everything came out fine, though. :)
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Darth_Kitten Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:51 PM
Response to Reply #44
112. Actually, higher I.Q.
Children of older parents tend to be high achievers. Nothing wrong with a healthy older couple having kids. We need more mature people having kids,not fewer. :)
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:59 PM
Response to Reply #112
117. i am not opposed to that, but that is not addressing
the result of older male sperm. it is addressing older, mature parents raising children. they are generally higher achievers.

http://www.ctv.ca/CTVNews/Health/20090310/older_dads_09... /

Children who are fathered by older men tend to perform worse in intelligence tests than the children of younger dads, Australian and U.S. scientists report in study they say is the first of its kind.

But in an interesting contrast, children with older mothers tended to have higher scores in the same tests, the researchers found.

They found the children of older dads performed less well in intelligence tests conducted at age eight months, four years and seven years. The older the father was when he had the child, the worse his children tended to do in the tests.

Regardless of their mothers' ages, children whose fathers were 50 years old had lower scores on all tests than those whose fathers were 20. The only exceptions were results of tests that assessed physical co-ordination.



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awoke_in_2003 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:06 PM
Response to Original message
50. same here...
people need to stay out of other people's bedrooms.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:09 PM
Response to Original message
53. True
She has the right to put a baby at risk. We all do. But this baby's odds are not so great... and the kid has no choice in the matter.
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Warren DeMontague Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:33 PM
Response to Reply #53
68. Okay, but where do you draw the line?
A lot of people make choices that others may not deem wise, healthy, or even morally appropriate, even in reproduction.

The choice has to be up to the woman in this case, no one else.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 07:24 PM
Response to Reply #68
149. It has nothing to do with what anyone deems wise...
It's scientific fact that the child and the mother run a much greater risk of health issues with a pregnancy later in life. People should be educated so they can make informed choices. Some people are going to ignore good information and show poor judgment, and that's another fact of life. But no line should be drawn... no one should be able to tell another if and when they should have a child or not. That is indeed a slippery slope!
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Yo_Mama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:06 PM
Response to Original message
63. Hear, hear
Some of this happens naturally - I knew a VP at one company I worked at who had been told decades ago that she could never get pregnant who became pregnant at 48, quite without any intervention. She was the most surprised mother I ever saw, but everything went great. She was physically fit, but by no means was she a "young" looking 48 year old.

We need to lay off all this telling people about how to run their own lives.
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:36 PM
Response to Reply #63
106. no she didn't
nobody gets pregnant at 48 by accident

i don't doubt that's the story YOU were told but the physical reality was otherwise

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Yo_Mama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 08:54 AM
Response to Reply #106
133. Ha, live and learn
http://www.everydayhealth.com/menopause/how-menopause-a...

She most certainly did. She had never used BC because when she was younger she was trying to get pregnant, and it never happened, and after consulting a bunch of doctors, she was told she could never get pregnant because of some structural issue. When approaching menopause, some women go into a period at which their hormones rise naturally. If you're ovulating and having sex, you can get pregnant.

I'm 50 and I'm still ovulating according to those hormone readings. I was told I'd need to use b/c for probably 5 years more because I'm not even close to being infertile and I am not even technically close to menopause. That's not surprising because both my mother and grandmother didn't reach menopause until their mid 50s. Believe it or not, you see a lot of graying women in abortion clinics - not every woman can carry such a pregnancy to term and many are appalled at the prospect. A lot of women who become unexpectedly pregnant in their late 40s choose to terminate the pregnancy based on risks. The lady I told you of did not.

http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/lifestyle/life/australi...
http://pregnancystories.blogspot.com/2010/08/both-grand...
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8503726.stm

One of my friends in college was a late in life baby. Her mother gave birth to her when she was 49 in about 1962 - long before we had all these fertility treatments. Her mother had had one other child about 25 years earlier.

It seems to me that children of older parents were more common when I was young, and I think that's because more such pregnancies are terminated now. Most older women work, for one thing. When there were stay-at-home mothers, I think such pregnancies were more likely to come to term, and then, attitudes and access to abortion were considerably different back in the late Cretaceous when I was a kid. Thinking back to high school, I'd say offhand that at least one percent of kids were born to mothers in their late 40s. I remember talking about it with a group of girls, one of whom had much older parents.

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Hatchling Donating Member (968 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:23 PM
Response to Reply #3
87. Yes. This question is both ageist and sexist. nt
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teddy51 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:31 PM
Response to Original message
4. Ugh, Whatever floats your boat I guess. As a male, I certainly would not want
my spouse giving birth at 50. Crap, by the time the kid is 16 you are 66 years of age, not cool IMO.
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readmoreoften Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:56 PM
Response to Reply #4
79. So, then you don't think a 50 year old male should be a father either?
Or are you just sexist?
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teddy51 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:15 PM
Response to Reply #79
85. Nope, just saying that I would not want to be a new father at 50 (personal preference).
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meegbear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:32 PM
Response to Original message
5. Oh that Demi
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:59 PM
Response to Reply #5
38. LOL
:rofl:
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mod mom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:32 PM
Original message
self delete
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 03:36 PM by mod mom
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:39 PM
Response to Original message
13. Indeed...
At some point I think women need to ask themselves: why risk bringing a child into the world who will suffer such hardship and pain.

Adoption at any age is a beautiful thing... and the risks are minimal... and the joy is great.
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mod mom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:49 PM
Response to Reply #13
57. There are risks with adoption as well.
I know of 3 families who adopted children from eastern block countries. The children are my children's ages. I don't know if there was alcohol or drug abuse during the pregnancy but the children have severe learning disabilities and one has anger management issues. I don't believe these kids could function independently. The parent's are older and now have to consider who will care for these children when they are gone.

I had my children at 38 & 39 1/2 and elected to have an amnio each time because I worried about who would care for that child when we were gone.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:03 PM
Response to Reply #57
61. This is very true... I've seen it happen...
But at least you aren't bringing yet another ill child into the world.

I was young and healthy and I still worried about all these things. Maybe that explains my puzzlement at this issue. I'm just a worry wart mom! :D
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trumad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:32 PM
Response to Original message
6. As long as the kid is healty.....
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:33 PM
Response to Original message
8. I cannot imagine...
I would never have enough patience or energy for a newborn baby now. When I see young mothers juggle all the accoutrement required, or in a grocery store with several little kids, I know this is something I did well in my 20s... I'd be a wreak at 54! And the kid would be a hellish brat... I'd probably do anything I could just to shut 'em up! I'd cry back at the kid during 2am feedings too. And that doesn't even start to address the aging body!
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teddy51 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:38 PM
Response to Reply #8
12. "I'd cry back at the kid during 2am feedings too" lol no kidding. This thought is not
pretty.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:39 PM
Response to Reply #12
14. that really made me laugh. cute. and ya..... nt
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Arkansas Granny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:41 PM
Response to Reply #8
20. The nighttime feedings would be bad enough, but I can't imagine
having to deal with teenagers in my 60's.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:43 PM
Response to Reply #20
23. Oh dear...
Yes, it was hard enough in my 30s. My main concern in this case is the health of the baby... the chance of inflicting pain... not worth it IMHO. Adoption is beautiful too.
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woodsprite Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:55 PM
Response to Reply #8
35. Nah, if you're pre-menopausal you'd probably already be up with them.
:)

I had my two at 30 and 37, and I can't imagine having one after 45, let alone 50. Even at 37, I was thinking "am I going to be able to keep up?". I could, it didn't seem to be a problem, but it's like you're body starts falling apart at 45 if you don't keep up with weekly maintenance. I'm 48 now, and looking forward to and counting down to retirement and being able to spend quality time with hubby while NOT being a full-time harried Mom.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:04 PM
Response to Reply #35
45. Hot flashes!
Maybe those are for heating formula... hot toasty breast milk on the way! Hahaha!

I'm sure that's why we hear how it's so great to be a grandparent... the kids go home eventually, right?
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Sheepshank Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:17 PM
Response to Reply #8
65. I had my kids starting at age 37.
As it turns out my patience level was 10x better in the child's favor in my late 30's and 40's, than in my aggressive, 'A'type personality, 20's. My kids are calm, willing to be educated, conversant on many 'adult' topics. They are generous and employ critical thinking skills. All things I don't know if I could have imparted in the same manner or as effectivley in my 20's. I take the time to treat them like individuals and never as property.

I am older than 50 and if my kids only came to me now, I'd be as pleased as punch. However, and without bragging, that woman in the pic looks 10 years older than I do. That's a pretty old looking 50 year old.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:20 PM
Response to Reply #65
66. i was 33 and 36. there are cetainly advantages to being older
and mid 30's, not a lot of disadvantages. my kids are the same way.
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Abq_Sarah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 09:37 PM
Response to Reply #65
122. She's a 63 year old model
And her "pregnancy" is the result of photoshop.

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FedUpWithIt All Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 10:47 AM
Response to Reply #65
140. I have a 19 year old i had at 20 and a three year old i had at 36.
It is much easier older IMHO
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 10:52 AM
Response to Reply #140
141. isnt that fun. nt
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hlthe2b Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:34 PM
Response to Original message
9. Isn't nude, pregnant bodies on the cover of magazines to provoke...
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 03:36 PM by hlthe2b
rather 1990s? I guess there really isn't anything "new under the sun..." at least in marketing. I just think it is a bit gratuitous to keep doing so (though I certainly have no problem with pregnant nude bodies) :shrug:

But as to the broader issue, if she's healthy enough to do so, has any needed friend/family support and resources to so--fine. Her business, IMO. At least she's not being implanted with massive numbers, unlike "Octomom"...
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BeyondGeography Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:35 PM
Response to Original message
10. It's dragging your ass to school functions when you're in your 60's that scares me
Not to mention dealing with adolescence, raging hormones and all the wonderful cyber-related issues that are part of the cocktail now.

Giving birth, that's the beginning of a 20-plus year process...
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Warren DeMontague Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:35 PM
Response to Reply #10
72. You don't want your teenager stealing your medicare part B drugs
no shit.
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Raine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:37 PM
Response to Original message
11. I know someone older than that who is raising a grandchild
when does someone become to old to do that? IMO when the person themself feels they are too old until then it's not up to anyone else.
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teddy51 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:40 PM
Response to Reply #11
17. Thats a little different though, it would seem that raising your grandchild
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 03:46 PM by teddy51
is a forced responsibility as opposed to a choice.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:41 PM
Response to Reply #11
19. Raising a grandchild...
Is a lot different than giving birth to a child when you are over 50. The dangers to the infant are more worrisome to me than anything else.

Adoption is the best option in this case, IMHO.
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Arkansas Granny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:39 PM
Response to Original message
15. I know there are no guarantees in life, but I worry that parents who have
children so late in life run a greater risk of dying or facing a serious illness before the children are old enough to be on their own.

Just sayin' because it's really none of my business if people want to make that choice.
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MADem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:39 PM
Response to Original message
16. Well, look what it got Elizabeth Edwards--cancer and death.
The medically introduced hormone load on post-menopausal women is enormous and can light off cancers that might not have otherwise reared their ugly heads, plus, if the eggs were oldies from the end of the line, and/or the sperm is from a geezer, you're going to see a greater likelihood of birth defects.

People can, of course, do what they want. I saw a documentary a while back that looked at this subject and the mothers were very earnest and loving--their older children were often a bit horrified (some because they freared having to raise their siblings through the Monster Teen Years after mom kicked off).

I don't find it at all shocking, but I do question the purpose of it. There are lots of kids who need homes--the need to go through the motions of pregnancy with donated eggs at that age, I just don't get. A saved egg from days gone by, maybe...but still; there are kids in this world who need homes, caring and love. Why not see what can be done about making adoption more accessible to older (often wealthier) people who have love and plenty of assets to give?

Of course, in my own family, some ninety years ago, a female forebear had a child -- clearly without any hormonal help -- just shy of fifty. Sometimes, it happens without any planning or medical intervention, but it's rare.

I guess I'm in the "Do whatever the hell you want, but don't cry to me if it ends badly" camp!
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tblue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:40 PM
Response to Original message
18. I wanna know how the heck she did it.
I saw someone like that the other day. It was a surprise, for sure. But it's not my business. If the mom's happy, who am I to say anything about it?

I love babies and would love to have another!
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Pisces Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:59 PM
Response to Reply #18
39. Donor egg and invitro.
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yawnmaster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:00 PM
Response to Reply #18
41. You want pictures??!? eom
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seaglass Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:37 PM
Response to Reply #18
91. She's 63 and it's not her belly :-) n/t
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PeaceNikki Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:42 PM
Response to Original message
21. Reproductive choice: no exception.
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dana_b Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:24 AM
Response to Reply #21
128. I agree
there are so many older men having kids but somehow that never seems to be a problem.
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HockeyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:42 PM
Response to Original message
22. Would never be an issue with a MAN
Why should it be then for a woman?
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:45 PM
Response to Reply #22
26. The same issues apply, actually...
Aging sperm are as dangerous as aging eggs... the health of the baby should be everyone's first concern. This is a risky pregnancy. But to each their own... I just hope the baby survives the odds.
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:47 PM
Response to Reply #26
29. thankyou. The other issues is the same - will he or she be a healthy living parent in 20 years?
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:48 PM
Response to Reply #29
33. True
Personally, I'd rather adopt an older child at that stage of my life. I get the urge to parent sometimes... must be about time for my kids to start having kids or something.
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Chorophyll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #22
27. Right? Thank you. nt
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #22
28. True. And the male having kids older usually has a younger wife. This 60 year old woman
needs a 30 year old husband to make sure one of them is still around when the kids is 20.
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:02 PM
Response to Reply #22
42. The most important difference
is that a man isn't going to carry the baby and then go through the rigors of childbirth.

Pregnancy and childbirth are hard enough when one is young.
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Hell Hath No Fury Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:06 PM
Response to Reply #22
49. I just saw someone I knew in high school -
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 04:06 PM by Hell Hath No Fury
over the weekend. He is 51 years old. He is the father of a 20 year old, an 18 year old, and a 5 month old with a new, younger wife. I think it is ridiculous for him to have had a child at his age, as I do with anyone that age -- regardless of sex.

Selfish selfish selfish people do this.
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HockeyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:00 PM
Response to Reply #49
59. My friend's Dad was in his 60s when she was in elementary
school. Her Mom was in her 40s. Her Dad died before she was in HS. Her mother remarried and at least she had a Dad while she was in HS.

Don't tell me the FATHER'S age doesn't matter. I heard all the kids in school call my friend's Dad her GRANDPA.
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:37 PM
Response to Reply #49
73. but the baby will at least have one young parent. n/t
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HockeyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:43 PM
Response to Reply #73
74. Well, she had 2 after her bio Dad died
because her Mom married a man the same as her after the bio father of her kids died. Late 40s or early 50s by then. Some would say even that was too old.
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:38 PM
Response to Reply #22
108. it is an issue with a man
did you have any friends when you were young who had fathers over age 50? i did

they had serious problems, if not the same problems as those whose fathers who flat-out died

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Chorophyll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:44 PM
Response to Original message
25. The reproductive choices of other women
are simply not my business.

But this article will no doubt cause a shitstorm of ageism, sexism, and classism. Yay.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:47 PM
Response to Reply #25
30. The only shit storm I see worthy...
Is concern over aging sperm and ovum... putting a child in danger... adoption would be my choice in this case, but to each their own and no one should forbid a woman or man from taking these risks... substantial risks at that. Riding fast motorcycles are a risk too... life is dangerous and we make our own choices for ourselves, and for our children. We can only hope we take more care in making the latter decisions.
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formercia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:47 PM
Response to Original message
31. I was 54 when my Son was born.
That was 11 years ago, and it still works. No blanks yet.
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a la izquierda Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 09:00 PM
Response to Reply #31
118. You make me smile.
That's wonderful :)
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formercia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 08:24 AM
Response to Reply #118
130. Thank You
I like to make people smile.

I'm a bit rough around the edges and my delivery could use some polish, but I'm working on it. :hi:
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a la izquierda Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 10:12 AM
Response to Reply #130
139. Polish smolish
I'm from NJ originally. I cuss like a sailor, have a fairly short fuse, and am a staunch defender of my family- even the Republicans. :)
Cheers!
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TBF Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:48 PM
Response to Original message
32. I had children in my late 30's after devoting much time to career -
and it was fine, but did involve extra testing, etc. I had been in good shape from running marathons, more so than many 20-somethings according to my doctor. That said, my own self-imposed cut-off was 40.

I had 2 children - thinking that since they are nearly 40 years younger than me, they will ideally have each other when they are older. It is sort of a sobering thing to think about, being that much older than your kids. Will you even live to see them marry and have children? That is why my cut-off was 40. I wouldn't tell others what to do, but that is what I'd urge them to think about.
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Lost-in-FL Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:49 PM
Response to Original message
34. As old as none of your damn business. nt
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EmeraldCityGrl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:57 PM
Response to Original message
36. I prefer to wait and hear how the kid feels about it. n/t
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:07 PM
Response to Reply #36
51. +1
Can you imagine being 60 and going to your child's kindergarten class... with a room full of 20 and 30 something parents? Interesting thought.

I was born on my dad's 19th birthday... my girlfriends found him quite handsome when I was in high school. And I got questioned by teachers more than once about "the older man who drops you off in the morning." My dad is 73 now and he still gets a kick out of that story ;)
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:12 PM
Response to Reply #51
55. not that old, but my kids are of a generation of older parents. i find more parents my age
than not.
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laundry_queen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:24 PM
Response to Reply #55
100. I agree with that
I had my first young - at 22. She's a teenager now and without a doubt when I go to school functions I'm the youngest parent there. LOL, most people think MY mom is her mom. I fit in more with my youngest's friends parents. I had my youngest at 31. I'm in the middle with that set. I find that now that I'm 36, tons of people my age are just having their first or second.
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 03:58 PM
Response to Original message
37. Well good luck to her...
There are pros and cons to everything.

She's probably more financially stable now and better emotionally equipped to deal with a child.

Physically? I don't know. I'm 58 and can barely keep up with grandkids who can pretty much care for themselves most of the time (7, 7 1/2, and 10). Can't even imagine the demands of a baby...

Anyway, if she's lucky she'll live long enough to raise the kid to maturity, and maybe even see a grandchild.

I know there are no guarantees in life, and someone who has a child at 20 could drop dead the next day, but really...

Oh well. Like I said...good luck to her. And I do mean that in the best of ways.

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yawnmaster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:03 PM
Response to Original message
43. remember, 50 is the new 40. Shouldn't be a probem. eom
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:04 PM
Response to Reply #43
46. yeah, but i think she's 60
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yawnmaster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:04 PM
Response to Reply #46
80. 60 is the new 45 eom
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Blasphemer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:05 PM
Response to Original message
47. Basically, it comes down to the individual
Male or female. Ten years ago I could not have imagined having a child in my mid 40s but now, I can see myself as being completely capable of raising a child ten years down the road. I have a friend who had a child at 40 and is adamant that no one should have kids beyond 34 but she had health problems in her mid to late 40s that make it hard for her imagine someone being physically able to handle kids beyond 40. My cutoff is probably 46 or so but I can see how someone who is 50+ comes to the conclusion that they will be able to handle aging along with child rearing. I have known absolutely fantastic foster mothers who are over the age of 60 and more active than some mothers half their age. I know that I was physically more capable of dealing with young children in my 20s but absolutely not emotionally capable. Now in my 30s (and I expect this to continue into my 40s) I have the emotional stability necessary. Health and life expectancy are legitimate concerns but a long life isn't guaranteed to any of us. I do agree that it would be wonderful if more potential parents considered adoption but that is a matter of personal choice and in some cases, particularly with international adoptions, there may be age restrictions.
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Habibi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:05 PM
Response to Original message
48. Um, how much "over 50" is this particular woman?
She looks 70 to me. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
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seaglass Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:38 PM
Response to Reply #48
92. She's 63 - she was just on TV - and it's not her belly. n/t
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 07:14 PM
Response to Reply #92
97. thanks.
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dana_b Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:07 PM
Response to Original message
52. if she is up for it, good for her!!
I think she's beautiful.
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DebJ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:11 AM
Response to Reply #52
125. Heart-breaking for the child though.
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ZombieHorde Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:11 PM
Response to Original message
54. Do we have an obligation to the people we may make, and if so,
when does that obligation begin and end? Do we have an obligation to potential humans?
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saras Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 04:54 PM
Response to Original message
58. Why is it anyone's business but the mother?
I can think of no reason that age ought to be privileged over any other hypothetical reasons for butting into someone's private life, any more than sexual orientation.

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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:05 PM
Response to Reply #58
62. If you read the thread...
You'll see most are only worried about the health of the child, which is at risk due to the mother's advanced age... and no one has said she shouldn't... no one is butting in... but plenty are rightfully concerned about the health of the child.
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DebJ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:14 AM
Response to Reply #62
126. But only about the physical health of the child and mother.
No mention of the need to have access to parental emotional support from parent's who are still in this plane of existence as you go through life. Nor grandparents for that child's children. Eh, who needs FAMILY? There is always Facebook???

Raising a human being and getting through the journey of life requires so much more than simply physical health. We used to call it parenting.

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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 07:20 PM
Response to Reply #126
148. There have been several mentions of that...
Serious worries... and I agree. I needed my mother and my grandmother and my aunt long into adulthood... would I have felt I was missing something if I'd never known them? Probably.
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:32 PM
Response to Reply #58
67. She allowed herself to be put on the cover, naked, with a caption asking "how old is to old?"
We were invited to weigh in the topic.
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Motown_Johnny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:01 PM
Response to Original message
60. My mother was 45 when she gave birth to me and my dad was pushing 47


I can't say they were to old to have me but I will say that they were pushing the envelope.


From my experience it was more like being raised by grandparents. They were in their early 60s as I hit my mid teens. This is also about the time their health problems started and I was dealing with a father who had cancer and a mother who was undergoing heart surgery while I was still in high school.


Do I wish I had never been born? No! But I will say that I wish I had been born ten or fifteen years earlier in their lives. That way I would have had another ten or fifteen years with them near the end.



People in their 50s having children need to consider the possibility of their passing on while the child is still young. I know this happens due to unforeseen illnesses or injury all the time, but the odds are greatly increased with age. Both the financial and emotional necessities of the child need to be well thought out early on.
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:34 PM
Response to Reply #60
70. I know of someone in your circumstance, when she was 40 or so, her parents were in their 80s
which seemed old to me at the time.
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Motown_Johnny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:29 PM
Response to Reply #70
103. when I hit my 40s both of my parents had passed on
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smokey nj Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 08:30 AM
Response to Reply #103
131. My parents were in their early 40s when I was born. They'd both
Edited on Thu Sep-29-11 08:30 AM by smokey nj
passed on by the time I was 23. I have older siblings so I wasn't left completely alone, but I felt like I didn't quite fit anywhere until I married.
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:01 PM
Response to Reply #103
142. That's too early.
:-(
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Hell Hath No Fury Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 03:05 PM
Response to Reply #60
145. You raise the point that makes me furious about old parents --
If 50 year old parents have a child, then that child will be responsible for their aging parents right at the time they are meant to be becoming independent, starting their careers, perhaps even starting their own family. It is a WILDLY selfish and unfair thing to do to a person, IMO. Making things worse, that child may very well be an only child, increasing the pressure and responsibility.

I am happy you are here, but wish you had been given more/better quality time with your parents. :(
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Mz Pip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:12 PM
Response to Original message
64. She looks much older than 50ish
but whatever works.

I wouldn't do it. If I had a kid at 50 I'd be dealing with the wonderful world of adolesence in my 60s. No way would I have the energy for that.

66? she'd be 80 with a 14 year old! :scared:
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shanti Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:25 PM
Response to Reply #64
102. yikes!
i was 48 with a 14 year old and that was bad enough! thank god, those years have passed, they almost did me in. i could never raise a child again. there's a reason mother nature invented menopause!
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Missy Vixen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:34 PM
Response to Original message
69. I know someone who had a baby at 44
It's not a picnic.

I'm over 50. I am very content with our decision to not have kids. I can't even imagine being pregnant at this stage of my life, let alone dealing with an active, energetic child.

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RebelOne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:47 PM
Response to Reply #69
77. My mother had my younger sister when she was 43 years old.
And then my brother when she was 44.
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RebelOne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:46 PM
Response to Original message
75. Really hate to say this, but she looks older than me.
And I am 72 years old. I do not have the facial wrinkles that she has. But all the more power to her if she wants to have a crying screaming baby in her later years.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 07:25 PM
Response to Reply #75
99. i think she looks good for her age. i dont know why everyone is going after her looks.
and wrinkles dont scare me. life. some get 'em, some dont
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:40 PM
Response to Reply #75
109. yes she looks very old, i'm guessing a photoshop here
i was thinking 70s as well for that woman
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alphafemale Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 07:31 PM
Response to Reply #109
150. I agree. That's a photoshop.
Mid-70's at least.
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Ter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:46 PM
Response to Original message
76. Yuck, I was eating!
:puke:
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yawnmaster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:05 PM
Response to Reply #76
82. What part disgusts you? eom
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TheManInTheMac Donating Member (512 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 05:50 PM
Response to Original message
78. Her uterus, her choice.
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WinkyDink Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:04 PM
Response to Original message
81. Ah, who cares? Her beeswax.
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Hatchling Donating Member (968 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:11 PM
Response to Original message
83. If her body, mind and spirit are up to it
I say more power to her!
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hedgehog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:12 PM
Response to Original message
84. One can acknowledge the woman's right to do whatever
she pleases with her body without necessarily approving of her decisions.
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Arkansas Granny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:30 PM
Response to Reply #84
90. Thank you. You expressed that quite nicely.
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theaocp Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:18 PM
Response to Original message
86. Stop breeding.
I don't give a fuck what age you are. Adopt one until there are none. THEN, start breeding again.

That's right. You just got a judgment call and I made it.
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tblue37 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:26 PM
Response to Original message
88. She's in good shape for her age, and I am not, but I am 61, and she looks older than I do.
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 07:23 PM by tblue37
Maybe it's the leathery skin from too much sun exposure, combined with the old-lady short gray hairstyle, but she looks about 65 to me.
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Crabby Appleton Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 07:01 PM
Response to Reply #88
95. She is 63, and it's a photoshop pregnancy .
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 07:09 PM by Crabby Appleton
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 07:13 PM
Response to Reply #95
96. well there you go: "I'm 63, I'm not going to be pregnant," says Maye Musk, the model in the photo.
!!
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tblue37 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 07:23 PM
Response to Reply #95
98. I'm a pretty good guesser, huh? nt
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:27 PM
Response to Original message
89. Gay people can't adopt but this actually celebrated. God bless America.
:puke:
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sarcasmo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 06:55 PM
Response to Original message
94. 68 when the child turns 18, that is if she makes it to 68.
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Darth_Kitten Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:53 PM
Response to Reply #94
113. Women over 40 who have babies will be watching those who became parents at a younger age die...
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 08:54 PM by Darth_Kitten
because they are 4 times more likely to live to be 100 than those younger parents.
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McCamy Taylor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:25 PM
Response to Original message
101. Hell, I know women who got pregnant in their 50s the old fashioned way. Now 60 is a big deal.
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Missy Vixen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:22 AM
Response to Reply #101
127. I'd be curious to know how that happened
The vast majority of women enter menopause at 50-51 in the USA, which means ovulation has ceased. Kinda' tough to get pregnant the "old fashioned way" when you're not fertile.

My friend had a baby at 44 three years ago via IVF.
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:30 PM
Response to Original message
104. well it's not fair to the child but such folk don't give a damn about their children
someone who waited until they were 50 or 66(!) to have a child doesn't love children, she loves attention

i pity the child and it is proven that a child of an older mother will have more health problems and a shorter lifespan but at the end of the day if the mother herself doesn't love her child enough to give that child the best chance in life it ain't my problem

if you're having a baby at 50 you will not be there to see nor do you care that your child will die younger than average at 60 instead of 80 or whatever it is

what would you like me to say? i'm guessing MANY people don't love their children, MANY people have kids to prove some bullshit point about their ego

this is nothing new, only the tech is new
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:38 PM
Response to Reply #104
107. i hadn't heard that. i googled and found nowhere stating older womens children
had a shorter life span. since you seem to equate that with selfishness and not loving the child, as a fact, i would need to see something suggesting what you are saying is true.
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:41 PM
Original message
since you posted two seconds after my post why don't you actually USE the google?
this is not secret information

do you not have an ob/gyn? why don't you ask her?

it is well known that the children of older mothers have shorter life expectancies, sheesh, this is not open to debate

i suppose you don't believe in global warming either...science is inconvenient, i know
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:54 PM
Response to Original message
114. i tried two different google key words. i came up with down syndrome and mother expectancy
nothing on the child. i have done research on prenancy and have had two of my own, in my 30's so i have stayed pretty damn informed on an older womans pregnancy. my doctor cautioned me on down, since i was 36 with my second.

you made a statement as factual.... and i am asking for proof of what you said. i see nothing on it.
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Darth_Kitten Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:57 PM
Response to Reply #104
115. That's a very unfair generalization....
Edited on Wed Sep-28-11 08:57 PM by Darth_Kitten
Not everybody gets knocked up at 19 or finds the right partner young.

I pity the children of younger parents who don't seem to get their parents' attention, because they are too busy out partying or texting on their cellphones constantly, and probably only got pregnant to snag some partner or were too lazy to use proper birth control.

There, a sweeping generalization.
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Sheepshank Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 09:08 PM
Response to Reply #104
120. pitiable, narrow minded, judgemental broad swipe.
Such is the case of someone who is ignorant of all the facts and think their opinions ARE the facts.
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:41 PM
Response to Original message
110. Some of the comments to this post could just as easily havew appeared on that . . . .
. . . . conservative site that mocks this place.

The woman on the cover made a reproductive choice. She chose life. Her choice is none of our business. This concept works in all directions.

It is a woman's right to make her reproductive choices.
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Darth_Kitten Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:47 PM
Response to Original message
111. Age is only one factor.
I say goferit. :)
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frogmarch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 08:58 PM
Response to Original message
116. The woman on the cover
looks way older than 50. I'm pushing 68, and I think she even looks older than me.

I'm glad I had my kids when I was in my 20s. I had a dream a while back that I gave birth to another baby and gave it to my son and his wife. Momhood would not be for me now. But for some older women I guess it is. More power to them if that's what they want to do.
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a la izquierda Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 09:01 PM
Response to Original message
119. It shouldn't matter...
I've told my husband a hundred times we can still have a family (we're 34-me- and 37-him). We've not been financially able to support children until now, because of my educational pursuits.
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War Horse Donating Member (314 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-28-11 09:31 PM
Response to Original message
121. I'm torn on this
As long as you are ready for it, I guess. Goes for any age.

People should know their limitations.

The experience of having a child often makes people "younger" somehow, though. And even young parents die, there are no guarantees in life...

Some people get their lives sorted out late in life, and there are plenty of too young parents as well.

Having kids remains an ego matter no matter how you look at it. If it wasn't there would be more adoptions.
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JVS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:42 AM
Response to Original message
129. Sure, use science to cheat nature. Anything but adopting a kid!
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LibertyLover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 08:51 AM
Response to Original message
132. 58 years ago, my mom, who was 45 at the time, gave birth to me
without high tech treatment or interventions. My dad was 52. Dad died at 81 and mom at 90, so I had them in my life for a good long time. 8 years ago, at age 50, I became a mother via adoption. My daughter is 9 now and the joy of my life. I can't imagine life without her. I figured that, given my family's history of longevity, it was a risk worth taking. Yeah, it's difficult sometimes when I have to go to her school and I'm absolutely the oldest mom there. It means that I try to keep my hair colored so the grey isn't that obvious and try to remember to slather on face moisturizer so the wrinkles get diminished. But in the end, a little girl who was found abandoned in a doorway in a small city in Hubei Province, China has a chance at a better life with a mom and dad who love her.
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Liberal_in_LA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 03:14 PM
Response to Reply #132
146. congratulations. I think you made a great decision
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Saphire Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 08:59 AM
Response to Original message
135. the photograph is photoshopped. saw her on gma Wednesday.
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Capt. America Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 09:00 AM
Response to Original message
136. Immoral and disadvantagous to the child. For f%*cks sake people, adopt a kid.
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ladywnch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 09:08 AM
Response to Original message
137. in answer to your question........ when the plumbing doesn't work anymore.
.....thanks to advances in reproductive technology its all very possible to get pregnant even if youre in the midst of menopause.


Jesus Christ! I thought I was safe!!!!!!!!!
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Horse with no Name Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 12:04 PM
Response to Original message
143. Not my body, not my choice, not my business. n/t
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quiller4 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 03:48 PM
Response to Original message
147. 60 years ago my mother was 37 when I was born
My father was 53. Two years later my younger sister was born. My parents used no speciacl treatment or intervention.

Each woman has the right to make reproductive choices for herself.
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benld74 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-29-11 07:32 PM
Response to Original message
151. The wife was 41 with our 1st(who is now 18), adopted 16 month old in 2002
They keep ya young AND moving!!
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