Campus e-mail just informed us that a guy's been lurking around the women's dorms around here...

[antigone382]

...following girls around and asking them to come with him into the woods "to find his cell phone." They've reported him and our Public Safety department is on the lookout, but we've been warned to travel in groups or with a campus-provided escort. Previously I haven't given a second thought to wandering around campus by myself, even late at night; I don't like living in fear, and generally I think the risk of attack is minimal. Some female friends and I actually plan on going camping tomorrow night on a nearby mountain. But now I'm a little afraid to go out after dark.

This is the second time in my life when I've felt it necessary to restrict my activity in response to such a threat. There was a guy who I'm pretty sure was stalking me (though at the request of my roommates, and because all my evidence was circumstantial, I very foolishly did not report it). I was not allowed to leave work without at least two escorts. Though I loved strolling on the sidewalks of the small town where I lived, I was unwilling to go out alone, and none of my roommates would go with me, so I was pretty much stuck in my own house all the time.

Wandering around outdoors is part of my identity, and it infuriates me to give that up out of self-preservation. I'm fantasizing about going out by myself in defiance, maybe even finding this lurker and getting in his face. But of course I realize how futile and dangerous that would probably be.

[HopeHoops]

1. I wasn't "lurking", I was "stalking". Big difference there.

Seriously though, get a small LED flashlight. They usually cost less than $5, are screaming bright, and can be used as a blunt-force weapon. If some pervert messes with you, first use it to blind him but move away from the point you are holding the flashlight as you extend your arm. That disorients him as to your location and makes any grab end up in thin air. It also gives you a nice vantage point for a nut kick and a follow-up punch with the flashlight in your fist. Police have used that technique for decades but it is most effective with a small light and LED bulbs are more blinding than full-spectrum bulbs in typical flashlights.

[antigone382]

3. Thank you, I appreciate the advice.

[HopeHoops]

6. I gave my eldest daughter one when she headed off to college - and she's a 2nd degree black belt.

Sometimes the simple things are the best solution to a problem. And if possible, getting out of a situation is always preferable to fighting. Blind the sucker and you've got a good opportunity to escape.

[Posteritatis]

5. Those things *hurt* when your vision's night-adapted

I have a biggish desk-lamp one. Was fumbling for it in the dark one night and turned it on directly in my face at about half a foot; spent awhile unsure if I'd damaged myself in the process (both my eyes and my head when I recoiled away and smacked into something).

[Le Taz Hot]

7. OK, I probably shouldn't have laughed at that

but it was kinda funny. Sounds JUST like something I would do.

[spin]

10. Why buy a cheap $5 flashlight to save your life?

Buy a small tactical LED light designed for self defense, such as those made by Surefire. Cops often carry these lights.

The lights come in a large price range but Amazon.com has one for $39.01.



http://www.amazon.com/SureFire-Nitrolon-Tactical-Incand...

Several years ago, I bought a Surefire L1 which has proved to be a great flashlight but is more expensive than the G2.



http://www.amazon.com/SureFire-Lumamax-Dual-Output-Batt...

Amazon also sells quality pepper spray, like this small canister for $7.79


SABRE Compact Pepper Spray with Quick Release Key Ring
http://www.amazon.com/SABRE-Compact-Pepper-Spray-Releas...

[RamboLiberal]

34. +1 on the tactical flashlight

If you want to get a flashlight immediately and don't want to wait for a tactical one then there are decent LED's for under $20 at a variety of stores - get something metal suitable for striking. If there is a gun shop, Gander Mountain or Cabela's nearby you can probably find a tactical light.

If you can wait to get mail order then I'd suggest getting one with a beveled striking area like this one.



Amazon has this one for under $30. http://www.amazon.com/Smith-Wesson-Galaxy-Tactical-Flas...

I'd also recommend getting pepper spray.

If you can, yes walk in a group and if alone try to stick to well traveled areas.

Being female I hate that we are advised to walk in groups, etc., which is one reason I choose to carry a firearm and do have a lot of years of martial arts training. I want the ability to protect myself.

But on a college campus the gun option is probably removed.

And don't let your guard down even after the threat is removed. College campuses unfortunately are good stalking areas for rapists and other attackers.

[Myrina]

2. ... go to your local bicycle shop ... get some "Halt" ...

.... it's what postal carriers use to stop dog attacks, basically an OTC mace. About $8 for a 6 oz spray can.


BE SAFE!!!

[antigone382]

4. Thanks! There are a couple of bike shops around here, I'll check it out.

[seabeyond]

8. i have had two stalkers in life. it is an odd place to be.

i also didnt "fear" going out at night. i lived in reno, nv for a couplde years and spent lots of time out and about all hours of the night.

it is, what it is...

stay safe

[antigone382]

9. Yeah, that's what makes it suck.

I don't have any aversion at all to being out after dark. But I feel that it would be irresponsible to do that knowing there is an obvious potential threat (and he has been spotted right outside my dorm and the surrounding dorms). Choosing to stay indoors, or feeling that I have to (or be accompanied by an escort) feels extremely unnatural and stifling. Once I get my paycheck on Monday I'll try to pick up some of the protective items others have posted about. I guess that's just the way it goes.

[seabeyond]

11. or.... you know that guy you think is really cute

give him a call, remind him of the alert adn tell him you really need to go to the library, or whatever, llol, and need an escort.

[antigone382]

15. lol, I would but they're all so much younger than me!

I know in five more years the differences won't be that big, but now it would feel like I was dating my younger brother

[Liberal Veteran]

12. Boy, Clarence Thomas just can't stay out of the news, can he?

[antigone382]

32. lol

description is a "heavyset white male, 20-30," otherwise I wouldn't be surprised.

[Tsiyu]

13. Oh yay

Just logged on and found this...

[antigone382]

16. No worries, I'm locked in a dorm writing a paper in between yelling at people online.

Keeping things exciting and (kind of) studious.

[Tsiyu]

17. That's good to hear

I'd hate to have to come up there...

I had an exciting evening, which ended with me being rescued by two strangers and a really nice cop...automotive/friend related...so now I am stuck home, too.

but no stalkers round these parts as far as I know. Except the furry and feathered kind...



Hey! Who on earth would you be yelling at?

[antigone382]

18. You'll have to find that out for yourself...

It would weaken my argument a little to have Mom rush in to my defense.

edit: car trouble? que paso?

[Tsiyu]

23. What are mamas for? lol

Yeah, our Vet pal invited me to "a great party on the bluff, deer chili, blah blah" - I saw him at the teacher's memorial service today (I sang "I'll fly Away" rather than the Dement song as the daughter requested something "happy".)

So we agreed to meet at our favorite coffeshop at 6:15. Well, I was running late as usual. You know old military man - he did not wait - so i headed back home not realizing:

A) i was on empty (no idiot light in this car) and


B) i had used my last check in the checkbook

When I ran out, I was thinking I was going to hoof it down the road with my guitar because i wasn't leaving it, and damn what a pain....It all worked out, thanks to a nice local cop and local couple .... but somehow he and I never do get together when we make plans! What's up with that?


Stay safe and let me know if i need to bring a posse of mountain boys up thar...you know I will!

[antigone382]

26. He needs to understand that you and I have a somewhat Latin American approach to time.

Karen had a lovely way of calmly sitting down to sip her coffee when she arrived at our house or at work, fifteen minutes late to work already. Since she's my role model in just about everything else, I figure why not my concept of time as well?

[Tsiyu]

27. Yeah. Indian Time is what it is

or Tybee Time...

But you were always the punctual one!

I agree about Miss KJ. I just don't think Crusty One will ever change. I love him all the same but I refuse to meet him anywhere again!

Now, let me know when you want the group I'm assembling in the forest to patrol the place up there. We'll get all war painted up and do some drum circles and get rid of that bad juju.

[antigone382]

29. Punctual? Me? You must be confused.

Did you see the post about certain American cities banning teenagers from going trick or treating? Apparently Robynn got elected to several city councils.

[Tsiyu]

30. yes and I applaud you for valiently defending Halloween

and a teenager's right to be part of it.

You brought up the arguments I would have made.

LOL about Robynn...

I don't think i can beat my pregnant Sarah Palin costume. I'm in a quandary as to who or what to be this year.

And to anyone thinking "why don't they take this to the Lounge?" i say, well, distraction lessens fear and I hope you are suitably distracted...

[Hawkeye-X]

22. Heya - haven't seen you in ages!

How's things?!

[Tsiyu]

24. Things are loco Hawkeye-X!

i was just admiring your sigline a moment ago, wishing we had more journalists who lived up to that definition.

Good to see you round on a Saturday night!

[Taverner]

14. Carry a gun

Short of that, carry Bear Mace

[antigone382]

19. I'll get myself some mace (or something like it) as soon as I get my check next week.

Though I fear I'm clumsy enough I'd end up spraying it in my own face

[Dappleganger]

21. Practice using it...

of course do it outside on a non-windy day, but it is important to know just how far you need to be in order to get a good "shot".

[Taverner]

28. Take the free class

They teach you how to make sure that never happens

[Dappleganger]

20. Yep...

Spent some time downtown late last night waiting to pick up my daughter, and I carried my Springfield XD 9mm 3", a custom-made kubaton (it's attached to my keys and made it through security at Universal, twice) and my small tactical flashlight. I know what it's like to be attacked and have no desire to be a victim ever again.

Our daughter never leaves the house without her keychain/kubaton and pepper spray.

[Tsiyu]

25. Sad to have to live like that though

especially when so many people are in prison...why are the cretins not locked up?

The tiniest drug law is enforced to the letter of the law...all of our law enforcement resources seem geared to this end.

Crimes against women? Meh

"Turn 'em loose."

It's infuriating as a woman, daughter, sister, mother...



But i applaud your pro-active approach.

[Odin2005]

31. YIKES! Stay safe!

[antigone382]

33. Thanks, I will.

There's a Humans vs. Zombies game going on, so hopefully all the angry-looking kids walking around with white bandanas and serious nerf artillery will scare him off.