What the hell is a 'ho' anyway? Anyone? Hello???

[The Straight Story]

My wife is driving around right now in Southern CA with her best friend. A gay guy who told me when he was here that he has had sex with several thousand different men over his many years.

Between my wife's first marriage and meeting me 9 years ago she had been with about 20 men - they wanted the arm candy and paid her well for it. It was her body, her choice. Is she a ho?

I have been with 4 women in my 41 years. 3 of which where I was in a committed relationship. One was in high school and a close friend. Oh, and I have had sex with a man...gasp!

All of us could be seen as 'hoes' because we were not with only one person in our life.

Is that what Imus and others are talking about? That if you are with more than one person in your life you are a ho? How many women/men have he and others of his ilk been with?

Is my mom a Ho because she was not only with my dad, even though she spent 50 years married to him and faithful? She had sex with others before dad.

I am a ho by the RW definition. So is my wife, my mother, and my wife's best friend. So is pretty much everyone I know on this earth.

If a 'ho' is someone who has sex with more than one person, than I think most of America fits that description.

So yeah - I am a 'ho'. So is newt, bush, but not rove (no one would be with him....).

If you got an issue with that, than you are not on the left. We are the party that respects that your body and your choice is a right that is not judged.

What the hell was Imus thinking? What does 'ho' mean anyway? And why is it something we see as a negative instead of seeing it as control of your own body?

My wife owns her body, as I do my own. I gave her mine, she gave me hers. We are in a relationship, one based on love and a prior agreement that we give that most sacred of things to only each other.

Others choose a different path - that does not make em bad, or 'hoes'. It, to me, shows the ultimate control over one's own body - to give it as you desire to whom you desire. And that is bad how?

[LisaM]

1. Well if you think everyone you know (or practically) is a ho

then obviously you don't have trouble with the term, but there are plenty of women in the world who are exploited for sex, and who DON'T have control over their bodies, and I think that's the context that bothers people about the word.

[liberaldemocrat7]

47. I believe rappers like Snoop Dogg, use the term Ho to refer to a woman who relies on looks alone

to get what she wants and tends to go with a man who appears the so called highest bidder and gives the average man the WRONG type of hard time. A woman who has sex with a lot of men, some people would call her promiscuous. Having sex with a lot of people does not make her a whore or a slut.

[Canuckistanian]

2. I think the criteria is that money is exchanged

Ho=Prostitute.

[Ecumenist]

14. In the vernacular of folks who originated---

The word, "ho", is southern corruption of the word "whore", basically originating in the southern Black culture. The term is used to mean ANYONE who has sex with multiple sex partners, gay or straight, paid or even worse in my subculture, UNPAID. So, actually using the "actual" meaning of the word, your wife AND her friend would be considered to a ho.

You would be considered to be a potential "DL" or "Down Low" type, assuming you're a man but not a "ho". I hope that helps. BTW, contrary to popular opinion, it's not considered a complement, by any stretch of imagination.

[Canuckistanian]

25. Hmm. I just thought it had the same meaning as the Anglosaxon word.

Learn something new everyday. But I doubt if the wife will let me use it when referring to her mother.

[SlipperySlope]

3. It isn't that hard

A "ho" is a whore, in other words a prostitute. It isn't just a matter of being promiscuous, it is the simple transaction of sex for money.

Given that, I think you can go over your list and determine who the prostitutes ("hos") are.

[LisaM]

4. Or of being used for sex and someone else gets the money

which sadly is not that unusual.

[AlCzervik]

5. pimp, usually a ho has a pimp.

[Ecumenist]

17. Not necessarily, Chimps---

A ho is ANYONE how has sex with multiple partners...read my response...

[JuniperLea]

6. I know a lot of people who have had sex with a lot of other people

And none of them are ho's. You are talking sluts there, dude. Not ho's. Sluts.

You're welcome:)

[MedleyMisty]

7. To me, the term means that a woman is just a cheap body

And that's why I find it offensive. It dehumanizes those of us with ovaries and a uterus. I guess in my perception it means the opposite of what you said about being in control of your own body. It means that the man using the word thinks he's in control of your body.

And don't even get me started on the word slut.

[iverglas]

21. good one

"a woman is just a cheap body" -- I think that sums up the intended message extraordinarily well. Ta!

[AlCzervik]

8. if you ever get a Chance HBO did 2 docs called "Hookers at the point" it's all about

ho's and pimps and what tragic lives they lead.

[smalll]

9. Well,

Between my wife's first marriage and meeting me 9 years ago she had been with about 20 men - they wanted the arm candy and paid her well for it. It was her body, her choice. Is she a ho?

Um, by definition, I guess she is, or rather was. Now she is merely a ho emeritus. :shrug:

[imax2268]

10. Here's one...

[Ecumenist]

20. No...that's a H-O-E, not a "H-O"... nt.

[1monster]

11. It's a garden implement which is used to break and cultivate soil

and otherwise prepare and care for planting and plants... What?.... Oh. Nevermind.

[dottym]

12. i believe the rappers coined the term "ho".

they use it all the time in their songs that denigrate women. but when imus says it all hell breaks loose. i've had many men in my life and i don't consider myself a ho, whore, slut, etc. it was the 60s "make love not war" and i did.


BTW. i'm not an imus fan.

[Hardrada]

15. I miss the Sixties and the early Seventies

a whole lot!!

Women say Yes to Men who Say No (to the Draft). I made it a point to say no to the Draft as often as possible.

[dottym]

18. so do i. didn't people seem

much kinder back then?

actually one of my boyfriends served in vietnam. another was an israeli guy who fought in the '67 war.

[Hardrada]

28. I'm not sure about people being kinder. In general, not so.

I used to get tossed out of bars (almost literally) for speaking out against the VN War and so forth. But there WAS a a really gentle strain in popular music and in the youth culture that does not exist now. An idealism that did not have a hard-shelled agenda. But I was a rad political then (as now) and motivated as much by fury as by poetry and viewed the flower children with wistful impatience.

[WA98296]

24. Remember Eddie Murphy on SNL in the early 80s? Velvet Jones' school for Hos?

[Cooley Hurd]

56. Yep (see below)...

GMTA...:hi:

[Cooley Hurd]

55. I'm pretty sure it was Eddie Murphy (as Velvet Jones on the old SNL)...

Velvet Jones was a "self-help" pimp who introduced a book (written by him), entitled "I Wanna Be a Ho." This was in 1982, and it was the very first time I've seen the term "ho" used in place of "whore."

[Buzz Clik]

13. So much information, so little time.

[Bluerthanblue]

16. my own personal twisted take on the word-

as a person who has struggled with long lasting effects as a result of CSA which paved the way for some pretty grim history-

I 'see' the word 'ho' as a cross between 'whore' (someone who has sex for "profit") and 'hole' which is the way a child who has experienced being violated in every availible bodily opening may come to see themself. As nothing but a hole to be used and discarded at will.

But, I will be the first person to admit my 'take' on this word is somewhat skewed.

.

However the word is intended- that is how "I" hear it.
What 'intent' would Imus have had to use such a word in a 'positive' way?

.

sorry- I doubt this makes any sense.

[Neshanic]

19. This is a PC speech violation. You need re-education in PC guidelines.

[BuyingThyme]

22. A guy named Jones wrote a book about this.

[Spirochete]

23. If you cut a Hostess Ho-Ho in half

and give one of the halves away, you'll both have a Ho.

[Neshanic]

27. Unacceptable making light of a sexist situation. Please rewrite.

[Radio_Lady]

35. So, if I'm in the Imus frame of mind, I'm supposed to say, "Ha-ha"???

Joke over.

[Megahurtz]

26. The Word "Ho" is Incredibly Stupid When

it's used by someone that doesn't already have the accent - doesn't speak that way. That's one reason why it becomes Racially offensive.

I don't know if it's already been addressed because I've avoided all of this stupid Imus shit, but the correct word and pronuciation is "Whore" which Imus probably would have never dared say on his show.

The word "Ho" of course is "Whore" and has been said that way for years by the African-American Urban Community. I call it a "Black Accent". I've always thought it sounded fucking lame when I hear a White person use that word when they never talk that way. It makes it a mockery of that accent.

So assumably all White Imus says "Hos" about an all Black Women's basketball team. That even irritates me, and I'm not even African-American.

Should he have been fired? Probably not, because I believe in Free Speech, and making too big of a deal out of this will affect that. People say Idiotic things all the time, you just have to turn them off.

Needless to say, Imus using the word "Ho" was immensely irritating to me, as it would be irritating to me if anyone who didn't have that accent used that word.

I don't think his "Ho" word had anything to do with the Team Player's sex lives.

I just think the Guy made an Idiotic statement and put his foot in his mouth.

[Nicole]

39. it isn't an all black team.

There are eight black players and two white players.

[shadowknows69]

29. One half of a tasty Hostess snack cake?

n/t

[Rosemary2205]

36. bwwwwhahahahahahaaha

I have come back and read that 3 times and don't ask me why but I am absolutely busting out laughing!!! :)

[aikoaiko]

30. Dude, yours is the whitest post I have ever seen on DU.

good work, brah. ;)

[MODemocrat]

31. The rappers call all of us women hoes

But myself, I just consider the source. It's their stupidity and lack of talent showing.
:puke: :dunce: :thumbsdown:

[ScreamingMeemie]

32. Wow. Did your friends and family give you permission to spill this??

Ouch.

[Reterr]

34. As an aside

When people post grandiose "I am leaving for good" posts that garner lots of attention and make it to the front page, don't they typically actualy leave :shrug:? At least until everyone forgets the histrionics involved?

I guess its more fun to get all the attention of the swan song and then keep posting as much as ever and hope no one notices :shrug:.

[Puglover]

44. ROFL!!!!!!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Savannah_H]

33. Rap Lyrics

so...shall we get rid of all the rap music that uses the word "hoe"? One of the reasons I hate rap.

[Radio_Lady]

37. This is going to give the Seven Dwarfs' refrain an entirely new meaning...

Hi, ho --
Hi, ho
It's off to work we go --
And if you're feeling low
You positively can't go wrong
With a hi -- hi, ho
etc.

[Hardrada]

38. Ho, ho, ho!

Santa's cheery exclamations also!!

[Bluebear]

40. 'gay guy who told me when he was here that he has had sex with several thousand different men '

Well, that's helpful.

[Nicole]

42. Isn't it though?

Sounds like a rightwing talking point to me. :shrug:

[Reterr]

52. Well ya know..thats what all of them gay dudes are like

:eyes:

[maddezmom]

54. didn't even read it after that line

:puke:

[Nicole]

41. I don't think a "ho" is everyone who had sex with more than one person.

"Between my wife's first marriage and meeting me 9 years ago she had been with about 20 men - they wanted the arm candy and paid her well for it. It was her body, her choice. Is she a ho?"


Isn't your wife a DU member? Are you sure she wants everyone here to know she sold herself? Like you said it's her body, her choice. It should also be her choice to tell her story. Or not.

[Bucky]

43. Why do I get the impression your next post will tell us about your penis size?

You might be sharing a little too much there, friend. I could read about four paragraphs of your confessional before it occurred to me that your well-written tangent about the derivatoin of the word 'ho' just completely misses the point. Imus isn't getting whacked cause he's impugned someone's sexual ethics. He got fired cause he was using the public airwaves to broadcast hate.

It's a shame when someone who writes so well insists on being so literal minded about one two-letter word.

[ecstatic]

45. lol

:rofl:

[Name removed]

46. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Name removed]

48. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Name removed]

51. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[LisaL]

49. From www. dictionary. com

"ho 2 (hō) Pronunciation Key
n. pl. hos
Slang A prostitute.


"


So now you know.

[Daedelus76]

50. hmm... I'm going to go off the deep end

And suggest that if you imply sex for money or material/social compensation defines a "whore", a great many women are in fact whores...

But I think there is also the widespread belief that a whore is also a person who is degrading themselves socially. A woman who marries up, or even at the same level, to get access to more wealth (or keep the same level of wealth) is often not considered a whore, not unless it's "obvious" in cases like Anna Nicole Smith, because she is "bettering" herself (Smith's problem was the guy was old and would no doubt die soon, which made her behavior seem insincere- get the money and run, without putting out enough "work" to earn her status). To me, it's a little hypocritical to define "whore" this way, but that's sort of how it is.

In the figurative sense, a whore is a person who sells one thing to get another thing, often doing so in a manner that degrades themselves. It's often applied after-the-fact. Tony Blair has been called a whore, in this sense. He basicly went to war in Iraq to try and get George Bush/US Government cooperation on international initiatives like Global Warming and the ICC. It failed, and Blair took alot of flack from Europeans for it. If it succeded, Blair might have been hailed as a great statesmen. So there's an implication of failure or degredation of ones ideals.

Having sex with alot of people doesn't necessarily make you a whore, I don't believe. It just makes you promiscuous. Which is a totally different animal. Alot of people might define it as "whorish" behavior, but they are ignoring the power exchange that takes place in being a whore- people who do the whoring are getting something in exchange for degredation- it costs them some kind of standing, or at least risks it- usually social standing or prestige. People who just have sex with hundreds of people are just upping their risks of getting a STD, not necessarily being "whores". That's how I see it.

BTW, I think Don Imus used the word because he thought it was an amusing way to refer to black women. Of course, he was wrong. A black man might get away with this, but not a white man. For one thing, Don Imus doesn't have the sensitivity to realize that when a hip-hop artist is taking about a "ho", he's not talking about somebody who worked hard to win and accomplish something- nor would a white person, for that matter. Now, the rapper might call a women a "bitch". You could have a hard working, succesful "bitch", I suppose, but it certainly still implies a measure of derision- that the person is being used/is disposable and has little value, ripe for ownership and exploitation. Imus could have called them "hard core bitches" and least avoided implying they were lazy thieves that skated in easy. And he still would have been fired. The moral of the story? Moldly old white guys shouldn't talk like black rappers.

[orleans]

53. it's a cheep shot to a female usually made by chauvinistic males

and according to american heritage dictionary it is a noun (plural hos)

Slang A prostitute
African American Vernacular English, alteration of whore
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/ho

and just to clarify

chauvinistic:
"of or relating to persons convinced of the superiority of their own gender or kind"
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/chauvinistic%20