BREAKING: Obama Fails to Deliver Sunny Weather

[FourScore]

BREAKING: Obama Fails to Deliver Sunny Weather
by Troubadour
Mon Aug 10, 2009 at 08:49:06 AM PDT

As you can probably tell, I'm quite shaken up - devastated, really - by the shocking failure of President Obama to part the clouds and provide sunshine this morning. After all the work we put in to get him elected, all the sacrifice, all the hope invested in his administration...wait for it...Is This Change We Can Believe In?TM I've been crying and drinking double-malt scotch all morning folks, because this is just too much.

First he ignores my repeated suggestions to appoint an Ice Cream Czar, then he doesn't show up at my nephew's birthday party despite being given three full days' notice, and now this. Meanwhile he's been gallivanting around the world eating fine cuisine while so many are going hungry, flying on his own dedicated jetliner without even offering rides to us mere plebs, and talking to people who aren't 100% in agreement with me. I now know why the caged bird sings.

Take a good look at it, folks:



That is clearly a sunrise in a cloudless sky. This morning's cloudiness is thus one more campaign promise broken, one more callous act of betrayal. There is no other way of describing it: It is tantamount to defenestrating Gandhi on to a pile of puppies and then lighting them all on fire. Most importantly, what do we tell the children? How do we explain to them that they are heading into a future where a president can't even be trusted to suspend the laws of thermodynamics, even when someone as deserving as I would find it really convenient? It's plain as day (though not this dark, dreary day, thanks to President Cheney Lite) that the presidential rain dance hat is at the beck and call of the sweater industry.

To show solidarity with the victims of this tragedy, who have been denied a bright and refreshing morning, I will be holding a candle-light vigil and interfaith prayer service at the local community center. Grief counselors will be in attendance, and I have asked the philharmonic chorale ensemble to accompany me in a song I've composed about my disappointment with President Obama's meteorological performance to date. The title is "Why, God, Why Hast Thou Forsaken Us?" It will further be accompanied by a reenactment of the crucifixion, which I think an apt metaphor for how we have been treated.

But all is not lost! We must contact our Representatives, Senators, and even Obama himself, to let them hear our voices united in one great, glorious whine that will shake the heavens with the sheer force of our pettiness and contempt. Their contact information can be found here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erotic_spanking.

UPDATE: Rahm Emanuel has still not been fired for calling some bloggers stupid. The insufferable outrage continues.

UPDATE #2: Hurry up and get this on Wreck List! What's taking so long!? We need urgent action on this, people!

UPDATE #3: The diary has come in for some criticism - clearly from sweater industry shills pushing the Cloudiness Agenda - so I would just like to point out that all shortcomings of this diary are directly attributable to Barack Obama alone.

LINK WITH UNBIASED POLL:
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2009/8/10/756676/-BREAKING:-Obama-Fails-to-Deliver-Sunny-Weather

[graywarrior]

1. LOL! The poll is great!

[Lex]

2. High expectations are teh funneh!

nt

[Barack_America]

3. It's always sunny in Philadelphia.

;)

[FourScore]

4. Unrec? REALLY??? It must have been Rahm...n/t

[sharp_stick]

5. I countered one of them

well written, nice job. And damn Obama and his too cute kids it's their fault you were so poorly treated and unrec'd.

[Cha]

24. The unrecs are from

those who need Pres Obama as their punching bag and they don't find it funny to make fun of it.

This is actually a very good OP with real activism links to do real work instead of whining on the internet.

[lihop at the ihop]

6. *****

(Apparently, this is supposed to represent mirth )

[FourScore]

9. I'd call it satire. n/t

[lihop at the ihop]

12. Or perhaps too much caffeine-inspired silliness?

[sharp_stick]

16. man that didn't take long

I did not even have the opportunity to follow this "newbie" for 20 minutes before the pizza came.

[Name removed]

17. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[sharp_stick]

18. Some assholes have far far too much time on their hands

perhaps a job or volunteer opportunity would help to get you out of mommies basement and provide you with a dose of Vitamin D.

[Name removed]

19. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[sharp_stick]

23. Damn 5 whole posts that time

on edit, I'm done with the trolls. It can be fun but that's enough for now.

[grantcart]

7. equally foresaken and recommended

[dorkulon]

8. HAR HAR corruption and no health care! Hilarious! nt

[FourScore]

10. Oooo-kay.

[MannyGoldstein]

11. Can You Reference The Post That You're Parodying?

A post that blames Obama for something that is substantially out of his control?

[Jennicut]

15. The OP is doing no parodying, its a post from Daily Kos

[AllentownJake]

13. It is sunny but its humid

I'm outraged.

[lpbk2713]

14. Give O a break. Hurricane predictions were lowered.

Link: http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5iA7a38BnG4BT_-Duj9aRbUfV47WAD99TIBF01


The prediction on the number of hurricanes for this season was changed downward.

Give the man a break.

:eyes:

[Hutzpa]

20. I knew all that hard work was in vain

clouds are revolting asking for their money back.

:evilgrin:

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

21. Expect the Obamabot apologists to mock us and call it "poutrage."

Vitamin D deficiency is series business.

[omega minimo]

22. Hiding behind sarcasm; New and Improved, American Sheeple -- With Snarkitude!!

:bounce:

[Hutzpa]

26. .

:eyes:

[omega minimo]

27. it's spelled "in vain," unless you mean weather vane.

:eyes:

[Hutzpa]

28. ???

:shrug:

[DevonRex]

25. OMG. Clouds rule the oval office!!! Whatever will we do now?