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Well, it happened. Obama's death panel decided I'm too lazy to live.

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Curtland1015 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:01 AM
Original message
Well, it happened. Obama's death panel decided I'm too lazy to live.
I got the letter yesterday. Turns out I spend too much time playing Guitar Hero and not enough building tanks and planting turnips. Plus my "stubby" little toes make me ineligible for breeding.

My wife seems less depressed about this than I would have expected...

Anywho, I've got to report to the executioners/post office on Tuesday.

Anyone want my Green Lantern comics?
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saltpoint Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:02 AM
Response to Original message
1. I'd love to have the comics but I got the same verdict. Woe is us, and
I'll see you in line.
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angstlessk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:37 AM
Response to Original message
2. OMG!1! I got 'stubby' toes too, this must mean I will be soon joining you
soon in the here after...glad I love jeebus an stuff!1!!
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AnnInLa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:41 AM
Response to Original message
3. I want to be a judge on that panel, because
there are some people I know ---- never mind.
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greguganus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 07:14 PM
Response to Reply #3
24. So now we know why Paula Abdul's not a judge on American Idol anymore. n/t
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taterguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:45 AM
Response to Original message
4. Sucks to be you
BTW, is your wife hot?

Just asking as a rhetorical question
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Curtland1015 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:34 PM
Response to Reply #4
9. Well... yes, why do you ask?
:shrug:

:P
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gratuitous Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:47 AM
Response to Original message
5. We'll miss you
I'd ask for your Guitar Hero game, but my turn's coming up pretty soon, and the guy behind me is saying "Less chat, more splat. Jump, Fucker!"
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hedgehog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:48 AM
Response to Original message
6. You need to send a letter to the editor about this.
We all do. Nothing will kill this sooner than making the "death panel" a joke.
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holiday Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 10:37 AM
Response to Original message
7. i think thats why paula abdul quit american idol
she wanted to be judge on obama's death panel
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WeDidIt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 10:39 AM
Response to Original message
8. What issues of Green Lantern do you have?
:evilgrin:

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Vickers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:36 PM
Response to Original message
10. It's gotten to where I hate checking the mailbox.
:(

That fucking socialist killing machine!!!1!!!!!!1!!!

:grr:

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Autonomy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:45 PM
Response to Original message
11. I'm jobless and an avid MMO player
I am sure my letter is coming Monday.
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Fuzz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 01:22 PM
Response to Reply #11
36. Which?
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Autonomy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 01:51 PM
Response to Reply #36
38. Currently playing LOTRO
Lord of the Rings Online, though I've played various MMOs and MUDs for years. Of course, I still play single-player games, too, all of which make me George Will's best pal. :p
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Fuzz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 04:26 PM
Response to Reply #38
39. How is that? Playing WoW right now. Played Asheron's Call for years before that.
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Barack_America Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:47 PM
Response to Original message
12. Hmm. I'm brushing up my resume in advance of my panel hearing next week.
Is the whole "team player" thing in or out these days?
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Curtland1015 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:52 PM
Response to Reply #12
15. Are you kidding? Being a "team player" is what Communism is all about!
As long as you work hard, aren't too short (or too tall), are in good shape, have no physical or mental abnormalities, aren't an uggo, and have strong working hands (or if a woman, wide birthing hips) you're a shoe in!
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Barack_America Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:56 PM
Response to Reply #15
20. Fuck. I'm narrow-hipped. I'll have to stuff my pants with Charmin.
Hopefully that will work. Whew. Thanks for the tip.

My grandmother had scads of kids. I'll be sure to bring that up.

I don't reallly work that hard though...
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kayakjohnny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:50 PM
Response to Original message
13. Death panel will be to basement restoration what death metal was to.....
oh crap, where was I going with that?
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madokie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:51 PM
Response to Original message
14. I'm getting old, can't hardly get around
and to top it all off my peter don't work right anymore so I'm expecting that letter soon too. damn'm anyway. I'd get the hell out but my feet are of no good for me to run on so I guess it's hide and watch and count my minutes left.
+1
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lillypaddle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:09 PM
Response to Reply #14
27. try viagra for that peter problem
and if your erection lasts 4 hours or longer, call me at 404-555-1234.
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progressoid Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:53 PM
Response to Original message
16. Less of you people means more Soylent Green for the rest of us.
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Horse with no Name Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:54 PM
Response to Original message
17. Not to be crass
But can I have your house?
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Curtland1015 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:55 PM
Response to Reply #17
19. You forget this is a communist nation now, Everyone owns my house.
Or socialist... not that there's a difference. At least according to the news I watch.
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Horse with no Name Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 07:06 PM
Response to Reply #19
22. Fascist, Communist, Socialist et al
To the RW freepers, they are ALL the same thing. You really don't expect them to finesse anything do you?
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Kadie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:55 PM
Response to Original message
18. I thought DU'ers had immunity!
Are you sure it isn't a draft letter for the new Department of Death! A whole new department needs to be formed. Lots of help will be needed.



:P








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TahitiNut Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 06:58 PM
Response to Original message
21. I think it's about time they found something for those draft board people to do.
:dunce:
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Hippo_Tron Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 07:11 PM
Response to Original message
23. Did you get a chance to ask the death panel folks about how they might rule on Sarah Palin?
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The Velveteen Ocelot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 07:21 PM
Response to Original message
25. I thought they were supposed to come to your house
and take you away in an unmarked van?
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PA Democrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 07:24 PM
Response to Original message
26. Dick Morris might be interested in your toes.
;-)
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Hekate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:38 PM
Response to Reply #26
29. Oh snap!
:rofl:
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dorkulon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-08-09 09:09 PM
Response to Original message
28. DEATH PANEL!!!11!!
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Curtland1015 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 11:38 AM
Response to Reply #28
30. Bwahahahahaha!!!
:rofl:
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ThoughtCriminal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 01:01 PM
Response to Original message
31. NO! You don't have to go to the P.O. for Execution!!!!
Report to the DMV for a few hours in the Agony Booth. See your Acorn Representative for information about alternative treatment options.

:P
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newspeak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 01:05 PM
Response to Original message
32. yep, I just got my notification in the mail
I'm to report to area 51-911 to the neutralizing chamber. I'm to be neutralized at 10 am on Monday. Ya know gotta keep the population down!!! ;-)
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SmileyRose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 01:06 PM
Response to Original message
33. recommended for the hilarity of the thread
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varelse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 01:09 PM
Response to Original message
34. Such a shame
the DUzy awards being suspended, I mean. This thread would be a shoo-in.
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SOS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 01:20 PM
Response to Original message
35. Your private insurer says "Thank you"!
The savings incurred will add a tenth of a cent to their stock price.
This will enable the CEO to buy his daughter an S-class Mercedes for her Sweet 16 party.

You are a modern American patriot!
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Jazzgirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 01:24 PM
Response to Original message
37. Well, I got the letter on Thursday. My legs are too short.
I am pretty relieved to know that I have to report to the executioners office on Friday. I'm just tidying up a few loose ends.
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 05:10 PM
Response to Original message
40. Well I'm postmenopausal, so even the RWers will be glad to be rid of me
Now that I can't breed any more fodder for their War Machine....





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Wizard777 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-09-09 05:33 PM
Response to Original message
41. Ha! You should have gotten measured for your chains while you had the chance.
You're going to be euthanized and I'm off to the fields to pick cotton fo' massa Obammy. :P Swing low sweet chariot.......
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