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This Morning I kissed my husband goodbye as I left work. By Dinner I could be Unmarried.

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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:02 AM
Original message
This Morning I kissed my husband goodbye as I left work. By Dinner I could be Unmarried.
This morning as I readied myself for work I awoke my husband, we have been together for almost 15 years (not bad for someone who is 35) and we were married on Oct 16, 2008.

I sat on the bed putting my shoes on, reached over and stroked my cat "Ginger". I got up, bent over and gently kissed by sleeping husband on the forehead. In a half awake, half asleep voice he said, "I love you"...

When I see him again tonight he may no longer be my husband. He and I, and our love will once again make him my "friend" or "partner" or "roommate", all terms we have had used for us...

I ask for those that do not care one way or the other, to think about this... to think about the fact that right now, at this very moment, MY LIFE IS OUT OF MY HANDS. I am a nameless faceless person who waits for a court to tell me if I am married...

I am freaked out... sad, and hurt.



I am on the right, without the glasses.
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bicentennial_baby Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:04 AM
Response to Original message
1. ...
:hug:
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CBR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:04 AM
Response to Original message
2. I am praying for the right decision. Best wishes to you and your
husband. Wonderful picture.
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Beetwasher Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:05 AM
Response to Original message
3. I Sure Hope Not
That would suck. I think the court will do the right thing.
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supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:05 AM
Response to Original message
4. ...
:hug:

waiting right there with ya.

Wish there was something I could say to make it better for you both.
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Happyhippychick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:06 AM
Response to Original message
5. ...
:cry:

I care.
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CatWoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:06 AM
Response to Original message
6. Ioo
:hug:
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Echo In Light Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:07 AM
Response to Original message
7. K&R
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cali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:08 AM
Response to Original message
8. your post brought tears to my eyes.
keeping my fingers crossed for you, your husband and all the other couples who are now legally married in CA and waiting anxiously to find out if their marriages are still valid.
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #8
47. TY
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sellitman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:19 PM
Response to Reply #8
107. Ditto. ( The Tears here are flowing)
That you should have to post this in todays day and age is shameful.


I wish you and your husband a world of happyness no matter what the outcome.
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csziggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:08 AM
Response to Original message
9. Damn, that you have to worry is so wrong - when you two look so right together
:hug: I hope the CASC gets it right.
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RetroLounge Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:08 AM
Response to Original message
10. ...
:hug:

RL
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ismnotwasm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:08 AM
Response to Original message
11. You two are beautiful
Your post made me cry.

I'm hoping against hope you and your husband have your human rights intact by the end of this day.

In any case, I'll never stop fighting for them, OK? Ever. :hug:
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #11
49. *blush* TY
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Mythsaje Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:08 AM
Response to Original message
12. Either way, my wife and I stand by you folks
I'd keep my fingers crossed if it would help, but it would make it SO hard to type.

Best wishes
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imdjh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:09 AM
Response to Original message
13. Regardless of what happens this afternoon- you have made history.
Never again will they be able to say, "In the history of the world, marriage has always been only for a man and a woman." They might have been able to erase it from parchment history, (or at least make it much harder to find) but in the age of the internet and the unbridled press history will not as easily be manipulated.

What you have done is nothing short of earthshaking in terms of history. They can't take that away from you.
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:09 AM
Response to Original message
14. I am so sad for you guys. *hugs* If I woke up tomorrow no longer married to my husband it
would break my heart. I know not everyone cares for marriage and dismiss it as archaic religious nonsense but for me there's always been something special about being able to say that I am his wife and he is my husband.

:hug:
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KillCapitalism Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
15. No matter what, you'll still have each other.
They can take your marriage away, but at least they can't take him away. Just remember that regardless of how this all plays out.
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OmmmSweetOmmm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
16. My hugs and best wishes to the both of you.
:hug:
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Hugabear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
17. Your marriage is a threat to fundies everywhere
I really shouldn't need to add this, but just in case - :sarcasm:

Seriously, I have yet to hear ANY right-winger give me a compelling reason why gay marriage is a threat to their relationship.
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pleah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:11 AM
Response to Original message
18. ....
:hug:
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Peacetrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:11 AM
Response to Original message
19. Thinking of you today..
:hug:
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CrispyQ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:12 AM
Response to Original message
20. I hope for a 21st century decision, not a 1950s one.
The best to both of you. Thanks for sharing your story & photo with us.

:hug:
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stray cat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:13 AM
Response to Original message
21. One of the best arguments I've seen for gay marriage - best wishes to you both
and good luck
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bigscott Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:13 AM
Response to Original message
22. YOU WILL BE MARRIED
but living in a fucked up state. I am tired of letting the government tell us what we can and cannot be.

YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND HAVE BEEN MARRIED LONGER THAN MOST STRAIGHT COUPLES!

(sorry for shouting)

Good luck to the two of you - you have a relationship that should be a model for all couples - straight and gay

peace
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Soylent Brice Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:13 AM
Response to Original message
23. no matter what happens
don't give up hope. we're all behind you 100%

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Solly Mack Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:13 AM
Response to Original message
24. ...
:hug:
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myrna minx Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:13 AM
Response to Original message
25. My heart is with you and your husband today.
:hug:
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #25
46. TY
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WeDidIt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:14 AM
Response to Original message
26. You two are a CUTE COUPLE!
I pray the court does the right thing.

If not, your story should be a rallying cry for the fight for the right thing.
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Greybnk48 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:14 AM
Response to Original message
27. My husband I support your marriage and rights.
I'm optimistic, I hope not wrongly. Be strong, both you and your husband.
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sinkingfeeling Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:15 AM
Response to Original message
28. Ain't this world a mess? Believe that there is nothing in this universe that can really take
anything away from the two of you.
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jobycom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:15 AM
Response to Original message
29. My aunt and her wife have been together as long as I remember
and I'm in my forties. Same deal as you--they're married, if someone allows them to stay married. I hate hatred. This nation one day needs to live up the ideals it was founded upon.

Touching post. K&R. And we've all got our fingers crossed that they'll do the right thing here.
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bertman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:15 AM
Response to Original message
30. I'm not a praying kind of a guy, but I'm doing some heavy hoping that you are
treated as equal Americans under the eyes of the law.

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KitchenWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:18 AM
Response to Original message
31. ...
:hug:


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hangman86 Donating Member (270 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:18 AM
Response to Original message
32. No matter what the outcome
he will ALWAYS be your husband as long as you love each other to the fullest extent. I know it's really important for that to be recognized by the damn government but, in my opinion, marriage goes beyond written documents.

With that said, I am still praying that the right decision is made.
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CADEMOCRAT7 Donating Member (557 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:21 AM
Response to Original message
33. My eyes filled with tears. I will keep fighting for your equal rights.
I am so sorry that you are having to suffer this anxiety. This is not fair. This is awful !
My husband and I both do not feel it is fair that we are able to have marriage rights, and those rights are not protected and open for all. This is about equal rights. We are on pins and needles here in the Bay Area awaiting the decision. We, as a straight couple, will continue to fight on your behalf. We can not be happy knowing that others suffer and do not enjoy the same rights we have.
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RevolutionStartsNow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:21 AM
Response to Original message
34. This just breaks my heart
As a Californian, I am just stunned that we are so backward here.
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Arugula Latte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:29 AM
Response to Reply #34
44. Same here, in Oregon.
I grew up in the Bay Area and live in Portland now (after time elsewhere). Oregon voted against gay marriage in '04. It shouldn't be like this ANYWHERE, but especially not on the west coast. We're supposed to be better than that.
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havocmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:22 AM
Response to Original message
35. Am hoping for a good decision on this one. Hoping the state recognizes your marriage forever.
And you two make a really beautiful couple. Thanks for being so brave and sharing the tragic situation foolish people have put you two in.

Best wishes for a long, happy married life together.
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Missy Vixen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:24 AM
Response to Original message
36. Please remember that we are with you
I am hoping for good news, too. You, and millions of others, deserve the legal recognition of your family.

Those who seek to prevent it are nothing more than bigots.

I hope for many happy years for you and your husband. Please give each other a hug from me.
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Gemini Cat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:25 AM
Response to Original message
37. Good luck!
:hug: That's a great photo by the way.
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Arugula Latte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
38. K&R
:kick:
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Starry Messenger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
39. Beautiful post.
I'm crying at work. :hug:
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dana_b Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
40. oh my
I am hoping for the best for you both. Thank God you have each other.
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Spazito Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:27 AM
Response to Original message
41. Very powerful OP....
My heart is in my throat waiting for the decision to be handed down and your OP is why. I want for you and yours what is already law in Canada, equal rights for ALL.
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:27 AM
Response to Original message
42. !. That's a lovely photo. 2. My heart goes out to you. I can't possibly imagine what you feel like
I can try to, but I'll NEVER have to worry about such a scathing injustice being done to me and my husband because of our genders. There is nothing right about that.

I know it will eventually change. The sheer, undeniable force of justice will bring marriage equality for all - but I'm desperately sorry for the hundreds of thousands, (millions?) of couples who are denied this human right, right NOW.

I shall keep you and your husband in my thoughts and prayers today.
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sandyj999 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:28 AM
Response to Original message
43. I will say a prayer for you and I know the God I believe in will hear me.
Because He believes in love. I will be hoping for the best for you both.
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Vickers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:30 AM
Response to Original message
45. Easily the most moving post I've seen on DU.

:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
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Chorophyll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:32 AM
Response to Original message
48. K&R. You are a beautiful couple,
and remember that no bigoted bastards can ever really un-marry you.
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Rhythm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:33 AM
Response to Original message
50. My 'roommate' and i send you the biggest hugs we can...
We've been together for almost 10 years; after we finish our undergrad studies here in West Virginia (we're both non-trad students at WVU), we're moving to a state that will guarantee us equality of the laws, and are hoping dearly that our choices can include beautiful California.

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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:34 AM
Response to Reply #50
52. We live in WV too :) Thank you.
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:33 AM
Response to Original message
51. I can not thank you all one by one...
Thank you so much all of you... I hope they do the right thing.
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JitterbugPerfume Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:35 AM
Response to Original message
53. if there is any justice in this world
you will always be married. This straight woman thinks you are beautiful--both of you just as you are.
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Terran Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:36 AM
Response to Original message
54. ((hugs))
Never forget that you still have each other. I believe we'll get there someday. Probably not in my backward-ass state in time enough to formalize my 23-year union with my guy, but for the rest...

You guys are both very cute, btw!
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:41 AM
Response to Original message
55. I pray that the California court will do what is right
what is required under our laws.

You and your's deserve no less.

The freedom to marry is one of the vital personal rights essential to the orderly pursuit of happiness by free persons. Marriage is one of the "basic civil rights" fundamental to our very existence and survival. The freedom to marry, or not marry, a person resides with the individual and cannot and should not be infringed.
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Exultant Democracy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:42 AM
Response to Original message
56. Brother my heart hurts for you. I speak for all of New England in inviting you and your Husband to
move up here. The human rights situation is a little bit better.
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DKRC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:42 AM
Response to Original message
57. So sorry y'all are having to go through this
You're not alone even though it feels that way.

:grouphug:
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livefreest Donating Member (378 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:48 AM
Response to Original message
58. this is heart breaking.
the government or the law can't take love out of your hearts
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ceile Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:51 AM
Response to Original message
59. Stay strong
We'll keep fighting....
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bluedawg12 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:53 AM
Response to Original message
60. I pray that justice will be served today and wrongs undone.
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Neecy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:53 AM
Response to Original message
61. This makes me so goddamn angry
You have a beautiful family and no matter what happens today, you have your love and the love of our community behind you.

The fact that we have to jump through these friggin' hoops makes me just want to scream.
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bluedawg12 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:57 AM
Response to Original message
62. ...
:hug:

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sazemisery Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:00 PM
Response to Original message
63. I hope this goes the way it should.
I'm tired of injustice.
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:00 PM
Response to Original message
64. You're married
You know it.

I know it.

They know it.

:hug:
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Toasterlad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:01 PM
Response to Original message
65. Times Like This, I Wish I Could Pray.
My thoughts and understanding are with you. And I'm given hope by your love. Stay strong.
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InvisibleTouch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:01 PM
Response to Original message
66. I do care...
...even though I'm the last person in the world who would ever want to be married, myself, and the issue has zero impact on my own daily life - but I care, because of the injustice of it, and I'm indignant over the bigotry driven by sad pseudo-religious losers who can't seem to be happy unless they make others miserable. Those who want to get married, should have that option, no matter what. It's just a simple, basic right. I'm hoping for the best for you!
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OHDEM Donating Member (802 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:02 PM
Response to Original message
67. Wow! Your husband is quite a catch.
What a beautiful couple! Congratulations on your long marriage!

You and he deserve all the happiness in the world including continued acknowledgement (and legal rights) of your commmitment.

I'm pulling for you and so many other happy couples!
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:04 PM
Response to Reply #67
69. Thank you - I agree!!
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tosh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:04 PM
Response to Original message
68. I care...a lot.
And the fact that we even have to be concerned with this today just plain SUCKS!! :eyes:
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tosh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:06 PM
Response to Reply #68
71. Damn!!!
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tosh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:08 PM
Response to Reply #68
72. Well at least they are ruling that existing marriages can stand.
Edited on Tue May-26-09 12:10 PM by tosh
Sucks overall.
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havocmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:18 PM
Response to Reply #72
84. Pardon the racist anachronism but: That was damned white of them.
Why does the California Supreme Court hate America?
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PopSixSquish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:05 PM
Response to Original message
70. You and All Others are in My Prayers Today
regardless of what happens, don't ever give up!

:grouphug:
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ohheckyeah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:09 PM
Response to Original message
73. I'm so sorry the
California Supreme Court upheld prop. 8. While existing marriages will stand it can't be much comfort knowing that civil rights for same sex couples isn't a priority in this country. It's a travesty.
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:09 PM
Response to Reply #73
74. So now I am in the "I got mine" class. Sad day for everyone
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ohheckyeah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:11 PM
Response to Reply #74
77. I don't get how any
judge can find prop. 8 constitutional. It is a sad day for everyone who has a heart.
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polmaven Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:46 PM
Response to Reply #74
96. You are NOT in the "I got mine" class at all!
I see that class as saying that as long as they have what they want, forget if anyone else can have the same......I do not think you and your husband will go there. I doubt very much that you will sit back and just revel in your own marriage while others are being discriminated against.

I hope for the day when threads like this one are no longer necessary!
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:10 PM
Response to Original message
75. I hope that you are still married tonight.
I still can't believe that enough voters in this state thought Prop. H8 was worth a YES vote.

:hug:
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democrank Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:10 PM
Response to Original message
76. You`re in my thoughts
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MagickMuffin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:12 PM
Response to Original message
78. Unfortunately the Court ruled against people who love one another
But if you are already married then you are still legally married. This was just explained on MSNBC.

I guess this ruling in favor of Prop 8 means the gay community needs to get the legalization of gay couples back on the ballot. NEVER give up.

:hug: to you and your husband.

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stray cat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:13 PM
Response to Original message
79. I'm glad your marriage was upheld - congrats.
I'm sorry about the rest of the ruling but I'm really glad the marriages to date were upheld.
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:14 PM
Response to Reply #79
80. Thanks... but I am sad for those that want to come after us...
I am special, and I don't want to be..
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stray cat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:44 PM
Response to Reply #80
94. Hopefully it won't be long.....
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CLANG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 09:26 PM
Response to Reply #80
158. Not only does the court uphold discrimination
Edited on Tue May-26-09 09:27 PM by CLANG
It also creates a minority class within a minority class. How does this hold any constitutional water?

Equal protection may ass!
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KittyWampus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:15 PM
Response to Original message
81. I am sorry but things will improve. You two will find justice. Sadly it will take more time
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Rebubula Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:16 PM
Response to Original message
82. Love
Be strong...he will always be your husband and love of your life.

No one can take that away from YOU!

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lies and propaganda Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:16 PM
Response to Original message
83. *bawling
Ive been a hot mess all day... and its 10:30


I cannot wait to know the verdict.. and I hope to hell it does in our favor!

Fingers crossed for you guys.. and Ginger too!
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grantcart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:19 PM
Response to Original message
85. what a lovely couple, glad your still legal


Couples like this make it easier to overturn next time.
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QueenOfCalifornia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:22 PM
Response to Original message
86. If I really were
the Queen of California... I would never take away your right to be an equal member of this fucked up society. I find it unthinkable that you are being put through this shit.

Peace.
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shadowknows69 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:23 PM
Response to Original message
87. I'm so happy for you Ioo that the CSC at least kept your marriage in this travesty
But your community there must be overwhelmed with anger right now. I can't blame you. I can't even say what I think I'd do in this case.
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:46 PM
Response to Reply #87
95. I I feel for others... I do not want to be special
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shadowknows69 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:52 PM
Response to Reply #95
100. It's a completely ridiculous ruling, but you should feel no guilt about it.
Now is the time for strength and perseverance.
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OnyxCollie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:26 PM
Response to Original message
88. K&R. nt
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slackmaster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:28 PM
Response to Original message
89. I'm glad the ruling spared your relationship
The fight will continue, and the rights of people to marry same-sex partners will be vindicated.
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nichomachus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:32 PM
Response to Original message
90. You're still married -- just freaks
Just like my husband and I are. The court has turned us into freaks. There are now 36,000 people who are married in a state that forbids them to be married.

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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:47 PM
Response to Reply #90
98. Yah Freaks!
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a la izquierda Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:37 PM
Response to Original message
91. I'm sad for you...
and I just heard the news as I walked in from teaching.
My mom is gay, and has been with her partner for nearly 30 years; if your situation had happened to her, I'd be irate. Right now, I'm just sort of sick.
Cheers to you and your husband, for a brighter day.
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bvar22 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:39 PM
Response to Original message
92. You touched my heart.
Thanks.

IMO, this is NOT a GLBT Issue, but part of a much larger issue that affects everyone....basic Civil Rights.

Equal Rights and Equal Protections for EVERYONE...NO exceptions.

BTW: Beautiful Photo !
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malta blue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:40 PM
Response to Original message
93. Your post just sent tingles down my spine....
I am glad your marriage will still be recognized, but I weep for the countless couples who have to face this sort of discrimination every single day in this country. It is a sad day.....
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Just-plain-Kathy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:46 PM
Response to Original message
97. I wish you both happiness...You're lucky you have each other.
:hug:
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Kajsa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:47 PM
Response to Original message
99. You are still married.
This shouldn't be on any ballot-
it's a personal matter no court should
decide!

I am so ashamed of my State Supremes
right now!

:(

That's a great picture of the two of you.

:)
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peacetalksforall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:52 PM
Response to Original message
101. Thanks for writing and the photo. Good luck to you both today.
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ElusiveSigh Donating Member (10 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:05 PM
Response to Reply #101
103. K&R. nt
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handmade34 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:04 PM
Response to Original message
102. we love you and are so very troubled by whats happening
...many of us are fighting for you and we will keep fighting. PROMISE!
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K Gardner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:08 PM
Response to Original message
104. I don't know what to say except I'm sorry, and ashamed of this country and the ignorance
displayed by people in it.
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goclark Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:10 PM
Response to Reply #104
106. Me too
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bdamomma Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:30 PM
Response to Reply #104
115. me too, gay people are not hurting anyone.
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:30 PM
Response to Reply #115
116. I can think of a few people that I would like to...
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defendandprotect Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:09 PM
Response to Original message
105. Hartmann just read part of the decision -- you're safe -- all the marriages will hold.
I don't know much more on this but shouldn't the question of involvement

of the Church's/$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ be questioned???

Best wishes!!!
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WeDidIt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:20 PM
Response to Original message
108. I am happy you're still married
I am reviled by the fact that no other gay couples can get married.

It's a pradox and shouldn't stand. It's fucking sick the courts would do this to people.
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SteppingRazor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:24 PM
Response to Reply #108
111. Your name is kinda apropos here, WeDidIt. Because the courts didn't do this to people.
We, the voters, did. Not that you or I voted for Prop 8 -- heck, I'm a resident of Florida, but rest assured I would have voted against if I still lived in Cali. I'm just saying that the blame for this doesn't really lie with the state supreme court, which issued an aggravating, but all too expected, ruling. The blame lies with the voters who codified Prop. 8 in the first place.
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Chovexani Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:22 PM
Response to Original message
109. Honey you know all of you were in my prayers
:hug:

I hope everyone who thinks this is just an abstract thing to be argued on a message board reads this. We are fighting for our lives and our right to be citizens under the law.

What gives me hope is that freedom is continually to roll here in the Northeast, I will probably be able to get married in my home state before too long.
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bdamomma Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:23 PM
Response to Original message
110. this is not right at all.
as a heterosexual woman this is horrible and so unfair.
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mzmolly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:25 PM
Response to Original message
112. You're a lovely couple.
I am so very sorry.
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jeff30997 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:27 PM
Response to Original message
113. Your post made me very emotional.
I love the picture.15 years together and you seem to be a very strong couple.That ruling sucks and I

sincerely hope that there's something that can be done.Can it go to the U.S supreme court ?

Anyway, all I can add is: :hug:

(Oh man,I have tears in my eyes again just typing this).

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DarkTirade Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:28 PM
Response to Original message
114. Fuck the court. Fuck the hateful mob. He is your husband.
No one can take that from you.
:hug:
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FourScore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:34 PM
Response to Original message
117. I just read the ruling. You are still married.
You and 18,000 other couples. But the fact that others cannot get married is a travesty.

:hug:
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ayeshahaqqiqa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:46 PM
Response to Original message
118. Read your post with tears in my eyes
I'm glad your marriage is still valid, but I'm crying for one of our patients here in Arkansas. He called because he's being flown to a hospital for serious surgery. His partner for many years was not allowed to go with him, but is driving to the hospital far away just so he can wait nearby to find out the outcome. These two gentlemen have the kindest voices (I've only talked with them on the phone), and their concern and love for one another is evident. But because of the stupidity and hatred of the people in my state, Bob can't be with Bill at this critical time.

I hope that, in my lifetime, all loving couples have the right to marry.
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gbate Donating Member (900 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:49 PM
Response to Original message
119. Thank you so much for posting this.
Edited on Tue May-26-09 01:51 PM by gbate
I love the picture.

You deserve to have the same rights as my husband and I share.

Bless you.
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keepCAblue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:56 PM
Response to Original message
120. Shame on the STUPID SIX
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Mira Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 02:05 PM
Response to Original message
121. I am enraged beyond words. Won't ever forget your post,
and the impact on me this day.
In my eyes and God's eyes and DU's eyes you are married.
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Juche Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 02:14 PM
Response to Original message
122. We need more stories like this. Have you thought of a letter to the editor
The concept of gay marriage is so abstract, but when you put an individual face on the sense of rejection and cultural oppression that these decisions have on human beings who have done nothing to deserve it, it makes it much more powerful of an argument for gay human rights.
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jeepnstein Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 02:26 PM
Response to Original message
123. Sounds like...
they split the difference. Left married couples married but barred further weddings, which I think is a cop-out. This matter needs to be settled.
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Enthusiast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 03:09 PM
Response to Original message
124. Sorry for the cruel and bigoted state
of our country. Those that profess their Christianity the loudest practice it the least.

As a married hetero male I wish you all happiness and success in your partnership. We have been married 36 years, I wish you the same and more.
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carlyhippy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 03:11 PM
Response to Original message
125. so sad.....you have put a face and a story to the prop 8 decision
I'm so sorry.
Carly
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 03:18 PM
Response to Original message
126. completely as a side note: cute couple!
:)
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 03:26 PM
Response to Reply #126
128. *blush* thank you!
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emsimon33 Donating Member (904 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 03:24 PM
Response to Original message
127. Please know that the rest of us will fight this with you
Prop 8 will not stand!!!!
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kimmerspixelated Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 03:39 PM
Response to Original message
129. In the words of Joni Mitchell:
From My Old Man: "We don't need no piece of paper from the city hall, keepin us tied and true, My Old Man, keeping away those blues".
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 03:42 PM
Response to Original message
130. On another morning, not so long ago, I kissed my husband goodbye
Edited on Tue May-26-09 03:47 PM by ScreamingMeemie
and was a widow by lunchtime. As heartbreaking as it might be... marriages should end by choice, or fate---not by decisions enforced by ignorance and bigotry. It is my sincerest hope that you and your husband have many happy years together filled with joy. They were the best years of my life.
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wellstone dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 08:27 PM
Response to Reply #130
155. Thank you for your post too. Am so sorry
for your loss, but grateful for the insight you have chosen to share.
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NEOhiodemocrat Donating Member (624 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:18 PM
Response to Original message
131. so sorry
remember not everyone wants to take away your rights. I feel that if your rights are taken away mine might as well be also.
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noiretextatique Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:19 PM
Response to Original message
132. the court made it clear that those who were married before Prop 8
are still married. the proposition failed to specify retoactivity, so you have nothing to worry about.
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:21 PM
Response to Reply #132
133. "nothing to worry about"....
except for the fact that he lives in a state that isn't committed to offering and protecting equal rights for all of its citizens. l
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noiretextatique Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:29 PM
Response to Reply #133
136. this is the same court that made this marriage possible
and 17,999 others. it's shocking that they've reversed themselves with this decision.
please don't lecture me, btw. i am a lesbian, and i am a californian.
the poster doesn't have to worry about his marriage being invalidated...unless another proposition is passed.
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:30 PM
Response to Reply #136
138. Please show me where I have "lectured" you...
and I'll not give you any of my background because I really freaking abhor it when people use the "I am...some of my best friends are..." line in order to make a point on a faceless message board. He's got lots to worry about.

Cheers.
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noiretextatique Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:31 PM
Response to Reply #138
139. you post was snarky and condescending
i took it personally, but perhaps you didn't mean it that way.
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:32 PM
Response to Reply #139
140. Then you don't know me at all...
And now, I'm not going to mess on a beautiful thread any longer.
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:28 PM
Response to Reply #132
135. Right Wing said they will appeal the part of the ruling that let me stay married.
So, i have lots to worry about.
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noiretextatique Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:30 PM
Response to Reply #135
137. the court made it very clear...very clear
that retroactivity was not mentioned in Prop 8 and therefore doesn't apply. at least that's some good news from this otherwise dismal ruling.
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nichomachus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 06:03 PM
Response to Reply #137
148. Right -- so look for the fundies to come back and try for that next
They're not going to stop now. There's blood in the water and they are energized.
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sipping radicchio Donating Member (48 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:48 PM
Response to Reply #135
141. I can appreciate your wanting the same rights as afforded others, but
please do not worry about what someone else designates you! Your relationship is not rendered legitimate because of that slip of paper. I know, I know, it's not fair, but I am just talking about beyond that issue. Is Mel Gibson's marriage legitimate because they have that paper? How about the Edwards? It's really an illusion and has nothing to do with love, which is why I stay the hell away from signing any document, if I can help it. But I just don't want you to get in a tizzy about whether these people will take away that blasted paper or not. It wouldn't make you less-than.

But I stand with your fight for equal rights.
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The Doctor. Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 06:23 AM
Response to Reply #141
165. Actually, that 'piece of paper' makes a world of difference.
When it comes to property rights, decision-making, and the most heartbreaking;

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.ph...
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Number23 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 05:58 PM
Response to Reply #132
146. Thank you for posting that, Noire. There is some comfort in what you've written
To Ioo: Hold on to your husband. Cherish him and your love. You and both beautiful and so lucky to have found each other.
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siligut Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:22 PM
Response to Original message
134. You two look like you belong together.
It is the unwise, bigoted people who are causing this heartbreak. We have hope on our side, we wont let them take that from you too.
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HOLOS Donating Member (390 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:49 PM
Response to Original message
142. K&R
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OKDem08 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 05:09 PM
Response to Original message
143. you are not alone
I make a point of talking to just about everyone on this issue in a small attempt to change attitudes. It will happen. It's just a matter of time.
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secondwind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 05:40 PM
Response to Original message
144. I am a straight woman, but very supportive of your equal rights!!!
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Wednesdays Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 05:41 PM
Response to Original message
145. K&R
:kick:
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panzerfaust Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 06:03 PM
Response to Original message
147. Marriage is more about love, than sex
no matter what one's preferences.

My heart goes out to you both.

I find it difficult to believe that so many marriages can simply be set aside. That is NOT right.
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catrose Donating Member (591 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 06:05 PM
Response to Reply #147
149. K&R
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winyanstaz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 06:07 PM
Response to Original message
150. I am sorry that the highest courts in california are using their power..
to make a mockery out of the Constitution and to put you both in such pain.
Hang in there..perhaps someday the dream of equality and freedom for all will still come true..we just have to keep on trying.
Blessings to you both.
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chieftain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 06:58 PM
Response to Original message
151.  I am so sorry and yet I know there are no words that can ease
your pain. I was one of those liberal heterosexuals who hid behind the formulation of civil marriage as a way to give us Democrats political cover. I gave up that pusillanimous fig leaf when I saw the joy on the faces of so many newly married couples and began to comprehend what the bigoted and their co-dependents in the liberal community were doing to our fellow human beings. It may be of no comfort to you and your husband, especially considering the source, but the Catholic Church teaches that the sacrament of matrimony is actually administered by the couple, one to the other. The priest, the congregation are mere witnesses to the rite. So to me it is clear that by those lights, you and your husband remain bound in holy matrimony. It ought not matter what anyone else thinks or says. And yet I know that it does matter and it does hurt. And for that I am profoundly sorry.
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TomClash Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 06:59 PM
Response to Original message
152. You're married
no matter what the State, the Court or any other institution dictates. It is your birthright. Don't let them hurt your feelings - that's what these freaks live for.

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Jeff In Milwaukee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 07:02 PM
Response to Original message
153. What God Hath Joined Together, Let No Man Put Asunder
So basically fuck the California Supreme Court and anybody else who says you're not married...
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Mermaid7 Donating Member (156 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 08:02 PM
Response to Original message
154. Hey just remember the gov can never sanction love
Things will eventually turn around...
what's most important is that you love each other.

No one ever can take that away, so who you regard as your husband
is your husband.

We will fight to get you 'legal' rights, but the love relationship can't be taken away

NOT BY ANYONE EVER!!!

HE IS STILL YOUR HUSBAND, isn't he?

YOU HEAR ME ?

and that is WHO will be coming home to YOU tonight.

NO-ONE CAN TELL YOU OTHERWISE!!!

At least not in your heart.

We will take care of the rest.

Trust us.
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wellstone dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 08:29 PM
Response to Original message
156. You should never have had to face today.
We will never take this battle for granted again.
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kudzu22 Donating Member (426 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 08:48 PM
Response to Original message
157. Two points on this
#1 - although the court's decision was unfortunate, they really didn't have a choice. The voters amended the constitution, and the constitution can't be unconstitutional.

#2 - that said, why is it so effing easy to amend the California constitution?!? A simple majority vote can change the fundamental underpinnings of the entire governmental structure? That seems exceptionally dangerous to me. To amend the US Constitution takes two-thirds of BOTH houses of Congress to even propose an amendment, and then three-fourths of the states to ratify it. It should not be an easy process. This is probably why California is so effed up.
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CLANG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 09:29 PM
Response to Reply #157
159. On your point #1
They certainly did have a choice. It wouldn't have become part of the state constitution if they had deemed the amendment unconstitutional.
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arthritisR_US Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:24 PM
Response to Original message
160. fuck them! you're married no matter what, and soon the rest of your country will
be saying so. Those narrow minded bigots have some heavy duty karma waiting them and I'll be there to cheer their demise. BASTARDS!!
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Nikki Stone1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:44 PM
Response to Original message
161. You're a cute couple. :)
And I am overjoyed that you (and friends of mine) can stay legally married. But we need to fight now more than ever.
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PBS Poll-435 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 12:24 AM
Response to Original message
162. Proud to be the 125th Rec
This is gonna get fixed.
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 04:59 AM
Response to Original message
163. I am with you and your hubbie, Ioo
always - and there are more and more of us every day
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Christa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 06:10 AM
Response to Original message
164. My heart goes out to you and your husband
:hug: :cry:

What happened yesterday is unforgivable. If the religious nuts would just stay out of the lives and bedrooms of everyone else, life would be better.
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Vidar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 06:47 AM
Response to Original message
166. Sorry for the pain this is causing you both.
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feslen Donating Member (138 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 07:24 AM
Response to Reply #166
167. :(
sigh....
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Ioo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 08:36 AM
Response to Original message
168. You all are way to nice - Thank you for the kind words. I am happy, and sad at the same time!
I want to thank you all for all the kind words. I am glad that for some this post has made this a real issue that they can put a face too.

I am happy because my marriage is safe for now, but I am sad because many may not know the overwhelming joy that day was to us.
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sammythecat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 10:31 AM
Response to Original message
169. Be sad, and be hurt,
but don't be freaked out.

Not to get all poetic on you here, but, although you may be in stormy waters, you're firmly anchored. You still have each other. :hug:
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JackDragna Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 10:37 AM
Response to Original message
170. Keep fighting.
The other side is the one losing the fight, slowly but surely. You'll get to call each other whatever the heck you please soon enough.
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applegrove Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 11:31 AM
Response to Original message
171. So sorry.
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