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NanceGreggs Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:49 PM
Original message
Mom's Parting Gift ...
I start my day by turning on the computer - bleary-eyed and hardly awake. While I brush my teeth and grab the first of a brazillion cups of coffee, my computer is busily downloading DU and my email messages.

I then settle-in to read my email, and check DU for the latest news.

This past Saturday morning, I followed my usual routine. When I read my email messages, I found one from my bestest friend evah - someone who I had lost contact with about ten years ago, who found me via a website.

My best pal, Leslie - the girl who saw me through the pangs of teenage love gone wrong, the woman who saw me through marriage, divorce, remarriage, affairs, career setbacks and all of the heartbreaks that life hands us.

My best pal, Leslie - who made me laugh when I needed it most, who made me dream of better days to come, who reminded me how strong I could be when life seemed determined to break me down.

Caught up in the excitement of having found each other again, Saturday afternoon became a flurry of emails - catching up on what had happened in our lives since we last spoke; children now grown to adulthood with lives of their own, husbands who were now ex-husbands but good friends, old acquaintances remembered, and the punchlines to private jokes resurrected to be enjoyed once again - the intervening years not having dulled their ability to send us into gales of laughter, the kind that only old-and-true friends can share.

In the midst of the delight of reconnecting with the joy of my life, I
remembered to check my phone messages. There was a message from my sister telling me that my mother had passed early that morning - peacefully in her sleep, just as she'd always hoped she would go.

There is not a shred of doubt in my mind that my mother's parting gift was my reconnection with Leslie - a girl my mother adored, and always thought of as one of her own. It's as though she whispered to me from the other side: "Nance, it's time for me to leave. But here's your best friend back, to keep you company after I'm gone."

My mother always knew exactly what gift would be the most precious and appreciated - there was never a Christmas or birthday that didn't include a special present that made me say, "It's exactly what I wanted - how did you know?"

Mothers know.

And my mother's parting gift, as she slipped peacefully from this world into the next, was the most precious and dazzling of them all.

Thanks, Mom. Gift received.

Until we meet again,
--- Nance





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ayeshahaqqiqa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:52 PM
Response to Original message
1. and you will meet again
Peace be to you.
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Inspired Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:53 PM
Response to Original message
2. I, too, believe this was your mother's gift to you.
This was a lovely story. Thank you for sharing it with us.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:53 PM
Response to Original message
3. Oh, my dear Nance...
What a wonderful message of love from your mom...

It made me cry, it did...

Blessings on her for that...

And for giving us you...

May she rest in peace!

K&R


:hug:

:cry:
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NMDemDist2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:53 PM
Response to Original message
4. ...
:hug:

I'm sorry for your loss, Nance, and the gift that has returned

:grouphug:
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The Straight Story Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:54 PM
Response to Original message
5. Thanks for this, this would have been my mom's 74th birthday today
And it made me smile thinking of her.

hugs to you my friend!
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MadMaddie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:57 PM
Response to Original message
6. My dearest Nance
No doubt your mother's parting gift was the reconnection with your dear friend.

I am sorry for your loss.
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AwakeAtLast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:57 PM
Response to Original message
7. Evidence of the ebb and flow of life
So sorry to hear about your mother. May you be comforted by all of your friends.

:hug:
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grace0418 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:59 PM
Response to Original message
8. Oh, Nance, how sad and wonderful all at once. I'm sorry to hear of your mother's passing
but glad that she went in such a peaceful way. And to reconnect with an old friend is such an amazing gift, especially during a rough time. :hug: to you.
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BrklynLiberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:00 PM
Response to Original message
9. Moms always know.....My most sincere condolences on the loss of your Mom.
But there is no doubt that she is still watchhing over you..
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babylonsister Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:02 PM
Response to Original message
10. Aww, Nance
My deepest condolences for the loss of your mom, but I'm glad she helped Leslie find the way back to you.

Mothers do know. :hug:
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nadinbrzezinski Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:03 PM
Response to Original message
11. My condolelensces
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calimary Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:06 PM
Response to Original message
12. My condolences. But I wouldn't be a bit surprised if she wanted to leave you a parting
Edited on Mon Dec-08-08 08:07 PM by calimary
gift. Especially such a sweet one!

It happened to me in a slightly different respect. My mom died the first of November in 2006. She missed voting in the midterms. The morning of her funeral Mass, the news broke (after bush had suffered a "thumpin'" and the Dems had taken back both Houses of Congress) that rumsfeld, at long last, was out. Everybody who greeted me at the church, when I told them the news - since I'd been watching the news while getting dressed - said my mom probably got up there and helped make that happen. They called it a parting gift, too.

I wouldn't be a bit surprised there, either. Your mom is still up there watching over you even now. It's comforting to know her passing was so peaceful.

:hug:
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malaise Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:07 PM
Response to Original message
13. Deepest sympathy
Sometimes mothers do know.
It's hard to lose a mom anytime but just before the holidays is hardest :cry: :cry:
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DemoTex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:15 PM
Response to Original message
14. Sweat dear soul, Nance .. my mom's departing gift was 6/26/2008.
There was an initial shock when my brother called (he is a radiologist). He said "she's gone." My other brother and my dad held her hands as she slipped away.

But, given mom's suffering, I never shed a tear. I guess Kerouac and Pirsig put me on the road of Zen .. which is, perhaps, the better road to be on in times like this. Or, maybe I should say, as good a road as any.

Find solace where you can. I shall think of you and I shall think again of my dear gone mother.

Bests

Mac
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Patchuli Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:25 PM
Response to Reply #14
26. I lost my Mom 6/23/03
She waited (the nurse thinks) until I went to my brother's house to shower after a night in the chair next to the bed and she slipped away. She never wanted me to watch her leave when I would take her back to the airport to go home 3000 miles away from me. She said she couldn't stand my sad brown eyes!
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Eurobabe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 04:43 AM
Response to Reply #26
52. Same thing happened to my ex-husband
in September. His mother (my daughters' grandmother) had been ill for about a year, in the end they thought perhaps she had TB or undiagnosed lung cancer. He kept a round the clock vigil when she went into the hospital for the last time, but on a Saturday morning, he left to go get some rest after sitting with her all night, and the minute he left the hospital, she passed. Isn't it strange how these things happen. Makes me wonder, about life and afterlife and all.

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barbtries Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:22 AM
Response to Reply #26
54. my friend Krista
bless her lovely soul, suffered so much for so long...as soon as her daughter got a really good job, she passed right on. i have always believed she didn't go until she knew that her daughter would be okay without her support.
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MountainMama Donating Member (60 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 02:25 PM
Response to Reply #26
95. My grandmother--7/1/06
She had been in hospital about a week. The last day her vital signs were fluctuating badly.

My mom still felt she would get better, though, and told her "See you tomorrow" before she and rest of my family left for the night.

However, the nurse said that as soon as they left, her vitals began sinking. The nurse said, "She waited until you went home."

I so regret being stuck here in AZ for that, but I know she's with me. Not long after the funeral, I had Chinese for lunch. The fortune cookie said, "An understanding heart warms all that are graced with its presence." That was my grandma exactly. The Chinese phrase on the back was, "Miss you." I still have it.

Much love to you, Nance. God bless you.
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glowing Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 06:39 AM
Response to Reply #14
130. My grandmother did the same thing.
I was the last to fly in and I drove straight to the hospice. I said it was ok, I'm here now.. so you can go when you'd like. The next morning my sister and I were going in alone to sit with her, and as we were driving in, I looked outside and said, "its so beautiful today, grandma would love to be out here on this perfect VT summer afternoon." When we got there, she had passed about 10mins earlier, almost the same time that I was saying she should be out in beautiful sun. AND it was like she knew to pass before we arrived so that my sis and I weren't the only one's sitting there watching her last breath. It would have killed us to do that and then get ourselves together to call the rest of the family in. And because everyone was home for the event, we had a reunion of sorts that we hadn't had since we were younger... which is something my grandmother loved, everyone together and sharing each other..

It was sad to lose her, but she lived as a great person.. and I know she's still watching down and enjoying a peaceful rest. Condolences on your loss, Nance. It does seem they know what people need in times that it might be a bit sad.
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Hissyspit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:17 PM
Response to Original message
15. Sincerest sympathy to you and your family, Nance.
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Ilsa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:21 PM
Response to Original message
16. No one knows you like your mom. My sincerest condolences. My
mom left us eight years ago. Not a day goes by ...
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bleever Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:23 PM
Response to Original message
17. Your mother raised a wise and loving person.
She gets my thanks, too.
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lavenderdiva Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:23 PM
Response to Original message
18. I am so sorry for your loss, Nance
My heart goes out to you over the loss of your Mother. I think she did send your friend Leslie your way, to help fill the void you would feel by her absence. Your story is quite beautiful- :hug:

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eridani Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:24 PM
Response to Original message
19. Even a good death of a parent is hard
I'm glad there were compensations.
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diane in sf Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 08:42 PM
Response to Original message
20. Thank you Nance, your mom had a very beautiful death and communication with you
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:04 PM
Response to Original message
21. Nance
I woke up Friday to the news that a good friend has passed away just hours before. My thoughts are with you. The grief comes in waves, doesn't it.
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Lugnut Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:09 PM
Response to Original message
22. I'm so sorry for your loss, Nance.
:hug: Mothers have a way of knowing what you need.
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FloridaJudy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:10 PM
Response to Original message
23. My condolences.
Your mother must have been a wonderful person: she raised a magnificent daughter.

Safe passage.

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Fire1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:16 PM
Response to Original message
24. my deepest sympathy, Nance
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:21 PM
Response to Original message
25. Aw, Nance
I'm so sorry about your mother.

Your post made me cry. Your mom sounds a lot like mine; I lost her in February.

What a sweet, wonderful parting gift from her.

:hug:

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annabanana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:29 PM
Response to Original message
27. hugs nance..
Leslie was clearly pointed in your direction by your Mother.

Clear as Daylight.
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Patchuli Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:31 PM
Response to Original message
28. I'm sorry Nance
Losing all of my parents was horrible. I was a reunited adoptee who had two sets. Sometimes I wondered why I did that to myself...well, not really. :grouphug:

I am so glad that you have your old friend back in your life. My best friend found me last year. We'd been separated 11 years. I love what you said about old-and-true friends. I feel like Carrie is back in my life and I in her's for a very good reason. Maybe it is a gift from our parents. The circumstances of her finding me were very strange...

Much love to you...
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Ichingcarpenter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:34 PM
Response to Original message
29. I'm so sorry Nance
My mother was ........ what can I say the best.
With three boys, I was the closest to her.

I really don't know what to say except to grieve honestly
and fully in order to help heal your loss.
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Orrex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:35 PM
Response to Original message
30. I'm so sorry for your loss--as was said above, even a parent's 'good' death is difficult
And I'm very glad that an unexpected reunion has helped to bring you some peace.

Best of luck to you and your family during this difficult time.
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peace13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:37 PM
Response to Original message
31. Peace and love to you Nance.
My thoughts are with you. Peace, Kim
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a la izquierda Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:38 PM
Response to Original message
32. My condolences, Nance.
I always enjoy your wit and humor, delivered with a sharpness I can appreciate. Mom's gifts are always the best.
I thank heavens each day that my mom is a young'un (53), but when my grandma passed away, there was a void in my soul that will never be filled.

I am sorry for your loss, peace to you and your family. :hug:
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Bozita Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:38 PM
Response to Original message
33. *gulp*
You're right. Mothers know.

My sincere condolences.


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CitizenPatriot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:53 PM
Response to Original message
34. what a beautiful way to honor your mom
your writing is always spot on, but this was truly magical. I wish you all that you need to get through this transition. My thoughts are with you and your family...I'm so glad Leslie came back into your life, right when you needed her the most. Moms always do know. Sounds like you had a wonderful one.

Take care...
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Mira Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 09:53 PM
Response to Original message
35. My heartfelt condolence, Nance. Your immediate recognition of the
parting gift and your ability to receive it are mitigating the pain for now.

It's terribly sad you lost your mother. I dread the day I lose mine and pray I can also find a parting gift to help cope.
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uppityperson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 10:25 PM
Response to Original message
36. Mothers know. RIP moms and condolences to all who have lost theirs
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 10:33 PM
Response to Original message
37. Nance
:hug:
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NanceGreggs Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 11:14 PM
Response to Reply #37
42. Thanks, my friend ...
... and thanks to The Clown for the reminder.

I just changed my avatar - Molly won't mind be replaced, and my Mama will applaud the sentiment.

I think I've just lapsed into a John Cougar Mellencamp song, real or imagined - but it's all good.
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nc4bo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 10:40 PM
Response to Original message
38. My deepest condolences to you Nance. nt
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DeepModem Mom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 11:06 PM
Response to Original message
39. Beautiful, Nance.
My condolences to you and my thanks for sharing this with us.
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babydollhead Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 11:10 PM
Response to Original message
40. she never has to miss you.
let the feeling feel you. May you continue to feel peace and joy in being her daughter.
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lpbk2713 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 11:12 PM
Response to Original message
41. I'm glad I read this post.



Thank you for sharing.

:hug:


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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 11:22 PM
Response to Original message
43. Moms can give such neat gifts at just the right time.
;)

And I thank your mom for the gift she gave the rest of us, that gift would be you.

:toast: To Nance's Mom - thank you.


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Warpy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 12:19 AM
Response to Original message
44. Mom's passing is a hard one
and it doesn't matter if it was expected or peaceful.

:hug:
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Missy Vixen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 12:50 AM
Response to Original message
45. Nance, I am so sorry for your loss
Those that live on in our hearts and our memories are never truly gone.

She must be so proud of you.
Julie
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Hekate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 01:09 AM
Response to Original message
46. These are rare and precious gifts in this life--I'm so sorry for your loss...
Yet you express so beautifully how lucky you are in having received them.
:hug:

Hekate


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renate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 01:18 AM
Response to Original message
47. I'm so sorry...
... yet glad that at least your mother got the death that she wished for, which I hope makes your loss easier for you to bear, too.

She must have been quite a mom, to have raised a daughter with such a gift for seeing what is beautiful and true.

:hug:
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democrank Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 03:45 AM
Response to Original message
48. My condolences, NG.
~PEACE~
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orleans Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 04:06 AM
Response to Original message
49. i'm very sorry to hear about your mom
and my words pale by comparison to my thoughts about this thread--i can't express it. suffice to say again: so sorry.

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Eurobabe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 04:37 AM
Response to Original message
50. What poignant thoughts
Now that I can see through the tears, let me offer my condolences to you and your family. Sounds like you two had an incredible bond. :hug: :hug:

You've got the power of the pen my dear. :grouphug:
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Triana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 04:40 AM
Response to Original message
51. Nance - I'm so sorry to hear about your Mom but so happy your old friend found you!
Absolutely a precious gift your Mom left for you.

Moms do know...
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barbtries Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:15 AM
Response to Original message
53. got chills reading this
Edited on Tue Dec-09-08 05:19 AM by barbtries
condolences on the loss of your mom.

eta: my mother had been dying for a few weeks, and my sister called us all to her bedside. for a couple of weeks i had wondered if it would play out this way. we asked the nurse if she would die today, and she said "probably." but i said, "she won't die until tomorrow, because that's the anniversary of dad's death," and the nurse responded, "i have also seen that happen." she lasted until 6 am on the 12th anniversary of her husband's passing.
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cal04 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:23 AM
Response to Original message
55. I'm so sorry for your loss Nance
My thoughts are with you and your family.

:hug:
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Swamp Rat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:25 AM
Response to Original message
56. .
:hug:

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Blue Gardener Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:39 AM
Response to Original message
57. My condolences
On the loss of your mother. She must have been an amazing woman to raise such a wonderful daughter. :hug:
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gademocrat7 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 06:12 AM
Response to Original message
58. Deepest sympathy, Nace.
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Fumesucker Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 06:15 AM
Response to Original message
59. My condolences...
:hug:
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Seldona Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 06:26 AM
Response to Original message
60. She left us all a gift.
There is no other experience like losing a parent. My heartfelt condolences.
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volstork Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 06:45 AM
Response to Original message
61. Dear Nance:
:hug:
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trusty elf Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:07 AM
Response to Original message
62. I'd like to join everyone here in expressing my condolences, Nance.
I'm very sorry for your loss. :hug:

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Skidmore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:09 AM
Response to Original message
63. Nance, heartfelt condolences to you on the
loss of your beloved mother and an understanding smile at the gift her passing has given you. My eyes tear in remembrance of the unanticipated gifts of remembrance and connection my mother left us when she passed away. Cherished and special, each one remnds me daily of the mysteries of life and death that we do not fathom.

Peace and joy in life be yours--as your mother gifted you.
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Subdivisions Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:16 AM
Response to Original message
64. My condolelensces, Nance. Your mother's gift will surely see you through. n/t
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shadowknows69 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:17 AM
Response to Original message
65. I'm so sorry for your loss Nance
Good journey to your mother. You have my deepest condolences. :hug:
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Mad_Dem_X Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:18 AM
Response to Original message
66. Nance...
:cry: :hug:

My deepest condolences on the loss of your mother. I'm glad that she was able to give you such a wonderful last gift.
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Bobbie Jo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:30 AM
Response to Original message
67. I'm so sorry, Nance.
Edited on Tue Dec-09-08 07:30 AM by bobbiejo
:hug:
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HamdenRice Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:32 AM
Response to Original message
68. My sincere condolences nt
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Nickster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:35 AM
Response to Original message
69. That's a great story, thanks for sharing and my condolences as well.
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flying_wahini Donating Member (856 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:49 AM
Response to Original message
70. Your Mother's presence will stay with you.....I still feel my Dad


with me at times when I would need him.....and it has been almost 20 years since

he passed away.

My poor Mom is ill right now and getting her affairs in order....

We are quite sure that this is to be her last Christmas with us.... and

hoping that she makes this one. She is 80.

My heart is with you and feels the angst and tears and beauty of it all....

Yes, there is beauty in the passing of a life that is so important to

us. It affronts us with their impact in our lives and realize and deepens our love for

them.

sending my heartfelt vibes your way....

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SalmonChantedEvening Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:53 AM
Response to Original message
71. Love and warm thoughts Nance
Safe journey to your Mother.

May we all find our missing Leslie's.

:hug: :loveya: :hug:
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nuxvomica Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 08:02 AM
Response to Original message
72. I think my dad may have given me a gift after he passed
Back around 2000 my company submitted two patent applications for which I was the sole author. One was highly technical and the other was less so, a product description basically. My father was extremely proud of my inventions and every time I saw him thereafter he would ask if I had gotten a patent for either one. I always told him that it's a long process and it was all in the hands of the Patent Office and the company's attorneys and I would be sure to tell him if I got any news about it. But he never failed to ask.
My father died on the last day of 2006. Several months later I was notified by upper management that one of my applications was going through the final steps before being issued a patent. I figured it was the more technical one, the one my father didn't really understand. To my surprise, it was the less technical one.
The day I learned a patent was issued, I felt kind of sad because my father had been waiting for this for years and now it came to pass less than a year after his death. I looked it up on the Patent Office website and was surprised by something. The actual issue date of the patent was a week earlier -- on my birthday. This was a huge birthday gift, as it turns out. Because this was the first in-house patent ever awarded to my company, I received a generous bonus, was feted at a nice dinner with my coworkers and family, and was honored at our annual meeting with the head of the company. It was like I had become a star overnight.
I don't know what happens when folks die and I'll continue to be skeptical about it but I've granted myself this one exception because it would be so nice to think that my Dad had something to do with it and somewhere, somehow he was enjoying all the celebration.

I will grant your story that exception, too, Nance. :D
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GrannyK Donating Member (226 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 11:09 AM
Response to Reply #72
87. Nance and Nuxvomica
Thank you both, and all others who shared an experience that demonstrates that death is not final because love is eternal and knows no boundaries.

In all likelihood we each have an experience in our lives that demonstrates this truth, though some find difficulty in accepting those little gifts, often because of some painful experiences related to religion. A belief in the connectedness of all and everything does not require religion to explain it. Science works just as well.

The first law of thermodynamics states that energy can change from one form to another, (recycled) but cannot be created or destroyed. Water into ice or humidity, leaves and bark into soil.

The energy that is You or I is not destroyed when the physical body dies. That energy, or soul, just moves on to another form, performing another service to the Universe. This knowledge inspired my belief in karma. Recycled souls makes much sense to my mind. The natural, and supernatural, world is a wonder of economics that offers fantastic information, if only we had eyes to see or ears to hear.

May your Mothers loving spirit continue to influence your insightful and thought provoking writing. You are a blessing in an insane "civilization."
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Bluenorthwest Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 08:09 AM
Response to Original message
73. Peace to you Nance
My Dad did some parting gifting as well. They do that because love is so strong, stronger than death.
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bertman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 08:19 AM
Response to Original message
74. Lovely story, Nance. My condolences for your loss.
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TwilightGardener Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:07 AM
Response to Original message
75. My sympathies on the loss of your mom--what a moving story. God bless her.
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Irishonly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:14 AM
Response to Original message
76. I am so sorry
You will see your mom again. She still loves in your heart and you will feel her near you in countless ways. I lost my mom in 83. Her body wasn't there for my marriage and the birth of my child but I felt her there. She wasn't with my in my fight with cancer but I felt her with me every step of the way. I hope your memories of her will bring a leap of joy to your heart.
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DrZeeLit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:16 AM
Response to Original message
77. Once again, Nance... tears. Tears of sadness and joy. Great timing. Love to you on both accounts.
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jhain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:17 AM
Response to Original message
78. You are in my thoughts, Nance
Your Mom was a very special woman to have created such a wonderful daughter.
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:33 AM
Response to Original message
79. I'm glad you can find this comfort
in your mom's passing.

Many condolences to you and your family, Nance.


Your story touched my heart in a way I can never really express...

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Billy Burnett Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:39 AM
Response to Original message
80. I'm very sorry for your loss.
Take care of yourself.

:hug:


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Kajsa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:41 AM
Response to Original message
81. I am sorry for your loss, Nance.

And yes, i do believe reconnecting with Leslie
was her parting gift.
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goclark Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 10:11 AM
Response to Original message
82. Prayers for you and the family
Your Mom was certainly a woman of substance and goodness.

What a gift she was to you and the world.

My Mom is 90 and in relatively good health.

She keeps telling me that she is tired of living.

She thanks me for being her daughter as soon as she sees me each morning.

Recently she has started to tell me "I dreamed I was saying Goodbye to you ~ I love you so much."

Moms have a way of preparing us for life.

God's Blessings from another daughter,

goclark :cry:


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Arugula Latte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 10:12 AM
Response to Original message
83. My condolences on the death of your wonderful mother.
I'm glad you found your best friend again. I reconnected with mine a couple years ago; it really eased my mind and filled a hole in my heart.

:hug:
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HillWilliam Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 10:13 AM
Response to Original message
84. Oh, dear Nance
Moms always "know things". I'm so sorry for your loss, but I rejoice with you in your gain. There are few joys on earth like reconnecting with an old and dear friend. Hug everyone you can while you can. Always part with loving words, because you never know if there'll be a next time.

Love from our house to yours.

Rev and HillbillyBob
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blondeatlast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 10:35 AM
Response to Original message
85. God bless you both (if you don't mind a blessing) and I believe somehow
you will see your mom again--maybe Leslie's contact is, indeed, your mom's way of staying with you.

I believe in magic. Prayers and thoughts, Nance.
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SharonRB Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 10:59 AM
Response to Original message
86. I'm so sorry for your loss, Nance
It brought tears to my eyes -- the wounds from the loss of my mother this past April are still so fresh and I still cry daily. I hope that somehow having your old friend back helps you through this difficult time.
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robinlynne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 11:11 AM
Response to Original message
88. I'm afraid I can't speak. Thank you so much. much love.
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shaniqua6392 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 12:52 PM
Response to Original message
89. I am so sorry for your loss.
I am thankful that you found your friend just when you needed her most. When God closes a door....Somewhere He opens a window. Blessings and peace to you and your family.
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Ecumenist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 01:24 PM
Response to Original message
90. Oh Dear Nance.. My deepest condolences. on the passing of your mom...
My mom's been gone almost 5 years now and I MISS HER EVERY SINGLE, SOLITARY DAY! I guess that comes as being an only daughter. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers and I do so hope that the gift she left you acts as a salve to your broken heart. :hug:
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mnhtnbb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 01:40 PM
Response to Original message
91. Oh, Nance. I'm sorry for the loss of your Mom. But the greatest gift she gave you
Edited on Tue Dec-09-08 01:50 PM by mnhtnbb
was to be the kind of mom who did always know--and I don't mean just about presents.

Some of us did not have such mothers. How lucky you were.

:hug:
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roguevalley Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 01:58 PM
Response to Original message
92. aw. I am so sorry, Nance. However, your mom is with you, just in
another form. when you laugh, she will be laughing with you. When you cry, her arms will be around you. There won't be a moment of your life that she is not a part of and you will know. She will show you. My mama
does every day. Bless you and yours. I am with you.
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nolabear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 02:08 PM
Response to Original message
93. What your mother gave you wasn't just the friend
but the ability to HAVE a bestest friend, to connect deeply with another human being, to receive nourishment from human relationships, and to feel a little magic on a sad day. She must've been a corker. I'm sorry for what you lost, but delighted for what you had.
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The Wizard Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
94. Condolences
on your mom's passing.
Everything she taught you lives on in you. We lost our mom last year, and though it was expected, the loss was/is still painful. You only get one mom.
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indepat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 02:49 PM
Response to Original message
96. Deepest condolences from someone who has lost both his mother and father these past six
months. :D
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Witchy_Dem Donating Member (496 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 02:58 PM
Response to Original message
97. Wow! What a cool gift. My condolences to you and your family.
Parable of Immortality
by Henry Van Dyke

I am standing upon the seashore.
A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze
and starts for the blue ocean.
She is an object of beauty and strength,
and I stand and watch until at last she hangs
like a speck of white cloud
just where the sea and sky come down to mingle with each other.
Then someone at my side says,
" There she goes! "

Gone where?
Gone from my sight . . . that is all.
She is just as large in mast and hull and spar
as she was when she left my side
and just as able to bear her load of living freight
to the place of destination.
Her diminished size is in me, not in her.
And just at the moment
when someone at my side says,
" There she goes! "
there are other eyes watching her coming . . .
and other voices ready to take up the glad shout . . .
" Here she comes! "
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AtomicKitten Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 02:59 PM
Response to Original message
98. My most heartfelt condolences to you and your family.
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berni_mccoy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 03:06 PM
Response to Original message
99. Nance, I am so sorry for the loss of your Mom
But happy that you regained a friend that you had lost long ago.

:hug: :cry: :hug:
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noiretextatique Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 03:57 PM
Response to Original message
100. my condolences
what a beautiful, loving gift your mom gave you.
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lightningandsnow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 04:31 PM
Response to Original message
101. I'm sorry for your loss.
But I'm glad you go to connect with Leslie again. :hug:
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apocalypsehow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 04:51 PM
Response to Original message
102. Sincere condolences & rec. n/t.
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H2O Man Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 04:53 PM
Response to Original message
103. I'm sorry.
The loss of a parent is very difficult.

Your friend,
Pat
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BlueMTexpat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:23 PM
Response to Original message
104. My deepest sympathies to you on the loss of your mom!
And to anyone else who has lost loved ones.

My sisters and I lost our own mom in August 2002 and our dad in September 2004. They were both very special people and they led good lives. Both were in their 80s and fortunately were spared the indignity of Alzheimer's, which they both dreaded more than almost anything else. Both were lifelong Dems and simply heartsick about the stolen 2000 election. We know that they are in a better place but still miss having them here, especially since they have missed seeing their great-grandchildren, born in 2007 and 2008.

I like to believe that both used their good energy to help elect Obama and they would have been so thrilled to be here for this historic election.

You WILL see your mom again. She's probably getting to know "Toot" right now. And what a wonderful parting gift she gave you! :hug:
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bigtree Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:40 PM
Response to Original message
105. aw, Nance
:hug:
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DainBramaged Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:43 PM
Response to Original message
106. You just wiped me out. Thank you.
:cry: :hug: :cry: :hug: :cry: :hug: :cry: :hug: :cry: :hug:
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islandmkl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 05:52 PM
Response to Original message
107. every sunset offers the hope of a new dawn...
thinking of you and your loved ones...
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bonito Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 06:33 PM
Response to Original message
108. .
:hug:
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childslibrarian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 06:37 PM
Response to Original message
109. Bless you, Nance
Edited on Tue Dec-09-08 06:39 PM by childslibrarian
And the miracle who is your Mom.
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blaze Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 06:48 PM
Response to Original message
110. Thank you Nance
We haven't met, but your post reminded me of reconnecting with my best friend of years gone by.... the friend who could finish a story almost before I started it. The friend who knew all the stories and understood all the subtleties... When we got together, we talked for hours... literally. We closed down the local diner with no clue that we had been talking for over twelve hours!!! It was like a coming home. I completely understand that joy.

That you will forever be able to connect that wonderful joy with the passing of your mother is an unimaginable gift.

Thank you for sharing it with all of us.
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dixiegrrrrl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 06:50 PM
Response to Original message
111. Your sharing gave me shivers, a teary heart, and another affirmation of the gift of "co-incidences".
Very sorry for your loss.
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DUlover2909 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:00 PM
Response to Original message
112. I'm sorry for your loss.
Hang in there! :hug:
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Stargazer09 Donating Member (625 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:21 PM
Response to Original message
113. Hugs to you!
I'm sorry for your loss. I know it's hard to lose a mom, because I've lost mine, too.

It sounds like your mom left you with someone to help ease the pain, and that's a wonderful gift.
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sueh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:28 PM
Response to Original message
114. I'm so sorry, Nance...
:hug:
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Omaha Steve Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:41 PM
Response to Original message
115. I can't find the words

I won't try. Take some time off. Enjoy some time with a lost friend found anew. We will be here when you come back.

K&R!

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NOLALady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 07:54 PM
Response to Original message
116. Oh Nance.
:hug:
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Richard D Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:10 PM
Response to Original message
117. Hugs and support to you.
.
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fortyfeetunder Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 09:47 PM
Response to Original message
118. Nance, my condolences.
Your mom sounded like a wonderful lady, just like you!
:hug:
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StreetKnowledge Donating Member (921 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 10:06 PM
Response to Original message
119. My Sincere Condolences
At least Mom left ya happy. That I'm sure doesn't count for much, but at least its something.
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RFKHumphreyObama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 10:59 PM
Response to Original message
120. My deepest, sincerest and most heartfelt thoughts, prayers, condolences and sympathies Nance
Edited on Tue Dec-09-08 11:00 PM by socialdemocrat1981
And that goes to you, your family and all those who knew and loved your mother. Your very beautiful, eloquent, poignant and touching post profoundly moved me and beautifully conveyed not only how much you loved and cared for your mother but also what a wonderful person your mother was. But then again, how could she not be? She raised a wonderful daughter in you and the legacy of her life and her character lives on in you and in all the hearts, minds, souls and lives that she touched during her time on earth

But I do believe that this life is just a beginning in a long journey and, like you, I believe this is not a final goodbye and that we will meet again. And I am reminded that, for all the grief, there is much to be grateful for. Even though my heart aches for you having lost your mother, I'm glad she died peacefully and in her sleep as she had wanted. And having received my own "gift" from the powers that be before my mother died, I genuinely believe that you re-connecting with your best friend at this time was no coincidence

I've enclosed two poems that gave me great comfort after my mother's passing. I hope they will perhaps be of some use to you. If they are, let me know because I've got lots more of them

I Am Standing On The Sea Shore
Bishop Brent

I am standing on the sea shore,
A ship sails in the morning breeze and starts for the ocean.
She is an object of beauty and I stand watching her
Till at last she fades on the horizon and someone at my side says:
"She is gone." Gone! Where? Gone from my sight - that is all.
She is just as large in the masts, hull and spars as she was when I saw her
And just as able to bear her load of living freight to its destination.
The diminished size and total loss of sight is in me, not in her.
And just at the moment when someone at my side says,
"She is gone",
There are others who are watching her coming, and other voices take up a glad shout:
"There she comes" - and that is dying.
A horizon is just the limit of our sight.
Lift us up, Oh Lord, that we may see further.

HER JOURNEY

Dont think of her as gone away,
her journeys just begun,
life holds so many facets
this earth is only one.

Just think of her as resting
from the sorrow and the tears
in a place of warmth and comfort,
where there are no days and years.

Think how she must be wishing
that we could know today
how nothing but our sadness
can really pass away.

And think of her as living
in the hearts of those she touched,
for nothing loved is ever lost,
and she was loved so much.

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rasputin1952 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 11:22 PM
Response to Original message
121. We pass through this world but once...
We live, we love we do what we think is best. We leave behind a legacy.

Your Mom left us with an image, a legacy; although the vast majority of us here at DU never met your Mom, we know her through you. Her grace and dignity abide within you and her wit and wisdom live through your words and actions. We all benefit from what your mother has left behind. Where would we be without you?

My thoughts and prayers go out to you and Jeff, may the pain pass swiftly, may the only tears you shed be those of joy, at the memories of the good times, the times that made you what you are today, a woman of grace, dignity wit and wisdom...a mirror image of Mother/Daughter.

She went before you to smooth the waters, this is what Mothers do.



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pinto Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 11:28 PM
Response to Original message
122. Your Mom did well by you,Nance, and you by her. My condolences.
I am glad she slipped softly as was her wish.

pinto
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Luciferous Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-09-08 11:31 PM
Response to Original message
123. I'm sorry for your loss nt
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Tuesday Afternoon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 01:02 AM
Response to Original message
124. May she rest in peace. My deepest sympathies.
:hug:
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polly7 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 01:08 AM
Response to Original message
125. My deepest condolences Nance,
She sounds like a wonderful lady, and I know you'll miss her. Try to remember that a large part of your heart contains all of her very best qualities and that she's right there, always.

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JDwho Donating Member (339 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 01:10 AM
Response to Original message
126. So sorry Nance...Moms really do know what (or even who) we need.
What a beautiful parting gift. I know you'll miss her. So very sorry for your loss.
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puebloknot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 03:48 AM
Response to Original message
127. Touching story, and one that I find very believable. So sorry for your loss. nt
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kywildcat Donating Member (529 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 03:56 AM
Response to Original message
128. Deepest Sympathies to you
:cry:
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Phentex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 05:59 AM
Response to Original message
129. You are a gift she gave to us...
Your words always inspire me.

I am so sorry for your loss. I hope the joy in reconnecting with your friend eases your pain. :hug:
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D-Lee Donating Member (457 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 06:44 AM
Response to Original message
131. My deepest sympathies -- and a story
Before my mother passed away, we agreed on a "signal" she would send if there were an afterlife. I got that "signal" twice within hours of her death, and then a great sense of peace and completion arose.

Thank you for sharing your story of peace ...
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LeftishBrit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 06:55 AM
Response to Original message
132. I am so sorry about your mother
All my best wishes to you and your family.

Lovely to hear about Leslie, and that you have this renewed friendship.
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grantcart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-10-08 05:57 PM
Response to Original message
133. I have been gone for a few days and with your earlier post thought I must have missed
something.

Here it is sublime, poetic and gracious.

Welcome back Leslie, Hope to see you someday Mom. You both come highly recommended by somebody whose recommendations carry a lot of weight.

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