The fun folks at Cracked.com have sifted through Free Republic, so you don't have to...

[backscatter712]

Enjoy their paranoia!!!

The 4 Craziest Right Wing Fears About Obama

I recently delved into the wretched hive of paranoia and bitterness that is post-election Right Wing forums. Apparently, all that liberal rhetoric about how we’re going to rebuild this country still applies, it’s just that now they’ll be doing it much more literally than initially thought. That’s because time and again, the folks in these forums insist that the nation will be burned to the god damned ground before they see Liberal elitists like Obama change a single hair on America’s sexy, but sensibly-styled head.

And while it could be said that stocking up on a small but furious country’s worth of firearms in order to fight a demographic that is largely armed with optimism and a can-do attitude is a bit of an overreaction, some people see every act of this new administration as a sign of the impending apocalypse, no matter how retarded that might seem:

...

#4. And He Shall Outlaw All Thine Weapons, and Probably Also Eat Thine Babies

The day after Election day, gun sales immediately spiked to a record high - mostly out of concern that the new administration would outlaw firearms for private citizen’s use, and only slightly for fear that Obama himself was going to come to every single NRA member’s house that night and steal their childrens’ life force to feed his all-consuming hunger for innocence. Seriously, according to these forum members, that was a genuine fear:

To: XXXXXXXXXXX

Hitler killed 6 million people if you only count Jews, include Gypsies and other and the total was approximately 11 million.

During the famine of the 30's, the Soviet government had signs put up throughout the Ukraine that read, "It is barbaric to eat your children".

Don't ever think we could not get there.

[camera obscura]

1. Awesome! Cracked is really popular with college-age kids, should expose FR to a wider audienc

and makes the Republican fringe look even crazier as a result

[crim son]

2. Whoa. Going to check it out.

I was there earlier this evening looking at worst names for rap musicians. Thanks for the heads up! Cracked.com is great.

[CoffeeCat]

3. I can't even imagine...

...what a flaming waste dump that place has become.

I used to read it occasionally, to get their take on Bush's latest crimes. It was interesting, at times,
to read them sticking up for Bush. Agree with them or not--at least some of their arguments were grounded in
conservative ideology that wasn't totally insane.

I was in there right after the election, and it was like a messageboard representation of "The Scream."
Total mayhem...nonsensical gibberish and they were all hanging on by a thread to the latest rumors about
Obama not being a US citizen.

George Bush was the glue that held them all together. Now, they're unhinged and they're all busy with
their latest research project--proving that Bill Ayers really wrote "Dreams of My Father."

True story.

Haven't been in there for a while. I can only imagine.

They're like caged rats, feeding only on each other's feces.

[madrchsod]

6. rimmy purgered most of the sane ones so that`s what`s left

how anyone could contribute to a site that never has updated their software. that site is so 90`s

[backscatter712]

9. Lately, I read it for the schadenfreude...

As does Cracked as we're seeing...

Though as mentioned, it isn't all funny watching the rethugs wigging out - there's another thread around here somewhere about a Freeper that mailed death threats and an envelope with white powder to Nancy Pelosi...

[madrchsod]

4. thanks...

i forget about cracked.. bookmarked.

[nadinbrzezinski]

5. The hulk... my lord, this guy writes funny

but we should not discount the crazies... at all

[Child_Of_Isis]

7. And He Shall Go All Gay on Thee and Stuff

That was hilarious!

[nadinbrzezinski]

8. Ah have you done it .... A...

kids might be readying...

I was busting at that one. Sadly I know some folks who are conservative who get all kinds of cooties and ickies when sexuality of any kind is mentioned...

[jberryhill]

24. Yes - Secret Muslims Want Everyone To Be Gay

Oy.

[bleever]

10. I like the guy

happy to finally see a resurgence of Venn diagrams.

Venn (whoever that was) rocked!


I totally overlap that.

[muriel_volestrangler]

14. Reverend John Venn, priest and logician

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Venn

Stained glass window in Gonville and Caius College, Cambridge:

[Swamp Rat]

22. Boolean proof that God is black?

[Seen the light]

11. If you don't recommend this thread, then I hate you

DO IT!

[struggle4progress]

12. What? No DUers were concerned by the "Obama eating a baby" pic?

[Blue_Tires]

13. hey freeps! THE ONE WORLD GOVERNMENT WILL TAKE YOUR GUNS AND MONEY

WITH ALIEN ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Patsy Stone]

15. LOL! Stolen, I say! Stolen!

Jim Robinson Says:
December 5th, 2008 at 6:38 am
The 4 Craziest Right Wing Fears About Obama (contains stolen FR material)

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/2143289/posts

[LeftinOH]

16. ..and the freepers have discovered cracked.com because of it.. their remarks in the 'comments' area

are sucking all the fun out of what is normally an enjoyable place to visit on the internet.

[emulatorloo]

17. kick n/t

[Laelth]

18. That article is very funny. k&r

-Laelth

[acmavm]

19. Good grief, so is this one...

The Top 10 Celebrity Sex Videos Nobody Wanted to See
http://www.cracked.com/article_16439_top-10-celebrity-s...

[backscatter712]

20. While we're on Cracked, check out...

25 Awesome Ways to Break Bad News
The 6 Most Retarded Gaming Consoles Ever Released

[sofa king]

21. I have to say that the Information Age has done wonders for Cracked.

When I was around eight years old, Cracked was a favorite magazine of mine, but even then I knew it to be a pale shadow of its competitor, Mad. Cracked even had its own knock-off of Alfred E. Neuman--Sylvester P. Smythe. I understand they aren't even printing a magazine now.

But it's Cracked which successfully made the transition to fully adult-oriented, regularly updated, and interesting online humor. Good on them for that!

[backscatter712]

23. Yeah, I remember Cracked magazine as a kid.

Mildly amusing, but yeah, if it hadn't changed its ways, it was doomed.

Thankfully, Cracked did change their ways, they abandoned the print magazine business, went online, and they got edgier and funnier. They did pretty well for themselves.