Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login

Constitution for the Neocon Gulag

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (1/22-2007 thru 12/14/2010) Donate to DU
arendt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jul-23-08 02:46 PM
Original message
Constitution for the Neocon Gulag
Edited on Wed Jul-23-08 02:48 PM by arendt
Article 1: The Unitary Executive

Section 1: The executive branch shall consist of the unitary executive (UE)

Section 2. The UE is composed of the President, the Vice-President, and various spooks, bagmen, weaseling Constitutional lawyers, and hitmen. Membership on the UE team is not formally announced, merely inferred by a truculent insolence and the presence of armed guards.

Section 3. The UE shall not be responsible to Congress. Members of the UE can ignore Congressional subpoenas, and refuse to investigate Congressional charges.

Section 4. The UE shall not be responsible to the Judiciary. The UE can simply refuse to obey their rulings; rename the crime with a euphemism and continue; or re-litigate them ad infinitum.

Section 5. The UE may use any executive department, agency, or funding source for its partisan political purposes. The Hatch Act is null and void.

Section 6. The UE does not need to honor signed international treaties, nor conventions of warfare. Since it is above all domestic law; it is above all foreign laws.

Section 7. The UE shall have its own private intelligence gathering team, with the right to overrule the NSA, the CIA, and NSC. The Congress shall be fed the doctored output of this team as the UE sees fit.

Section 8. The UE shall have its own private army, Blackwater; and the military shall use the UE's private logistics company, Halliburton. Both organizations, as members of the UE, are above the law, both domestic and international.

Section 9. The UE shall have its own, private Ministry of Propaganda, the corporate media. This ministry will support the bad cop party and demonize the good cop party. (See article 2)

Section 10. The UE shall shall have direct control of the banking system through loopholes written into the FNMA bailout bill. The UE has the right to bail out corporate crooks without end using taxpayer dollars. When the UE cannot completely corrupt or eviscerate them, the UE banking system shall simply ignore regulatory agencies created by Congressional legislation, especially New Deal era agencies like the SEC.

Article 2: The Two Political Parties

Section 1. The legislative branch shall be composed of two political parties, the good cops and the bad cops - both paid for with corporate bribery.

Section 2. The bad cop party in Congress can break all the Congressional rules (hold votes open, lobby on the floor) with impunity. Its members can openly flout the law (Vitter, Craig, Foley).

Section 3. The bad cop party may coordinate directly with corporate lobbyists and their bagmen, like Jack Abramoff. Only the most egregiously stupid and blatant crooks, like Duke Cunningham, will ever get caught, much less go to jail.

Section 3. The good cop party will limit its activity to "stern letters" and the occasional outburst, when needed to maintain the merest pretense of opposition. The good cop party will obey all the rules and always give the bad cop party and the UE the full benefit of the doubt, no matter how undeserved.

Good cop party members can be investigated, charged, and jailed on the thinnest of excuses. They shall be accused of treason, communist sympathies, and child molestation on a daily basis.

Section 2. The Congress shall have no power which is not approved by the UE. It will regulate nothing the UE wants unregulated. It will establish no impartial laws, nor enforce those already on the books.

Section 3: The Congress shall sign away its rights to regulate banks, spying, the environment, and any other meaningful power it has historically exercised.

Section 4: The Congress shall unceasingly and without limit vote moneys for warmongering, spying, SWAT teams, prisons, concentration camps, and torture. It shall never vote to increase social programs.

Section 5. The Congress shall spend the remainder of its time introducing and debating irrelevant, divisive, wedge-issue resolutions about flag-burning, school prayer, the confederate flag, sex in the media, sex education, family values, the gay agenda, our "Christian" nation, etc.

Article 3 The Judiciary

Section 1. The Judiciary shall be stacked by the UE and the bad cop party. Occasionally, a nominee may commit a public crime and not be approved. Mostly, though, the good cop party will hand a new whip to each new overseer as it approves him.

Section 2. Whenever the Judiciary supports the UE, it is wise. Whenever it opposes the UE, it is "activist".

Section 3: Precedents are for wusses.

Section 4. Whenever the UE wants to interfere with the business of the states, the Judiciary will grant this power. Whenever the UE wants to ignore a problem or block Federal legislative intent, the Judiciary will appeal to "states rights".

Section 5. The SCOTUS shall be stacked with the most rigid rightwing ideologues. The fact that they express contempt for the Constitution is not a disqualification, but rather, the highest qualification.

The Bill of Rights

Article 1. There are none.


There, doesn't that make everything perfectly clear? No more cognitive dissonance about being a citizen of a democracy. No more anguishing over rights that are in danger. No more guilt over the millions we have murdered and imprisoned. Just bend over and accept it.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
arendt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jul-23-08 03:42 PM
Response to Original message
1. will kick for a comment n/t
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
arendt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jul-23-08 05:41 PM
Response to Original message
2. isn't anyone tired of mocking out Robert Novak? any comments? n/t
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
Breeze54 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jul-23-08 05:44 PM
Response to Original message
3. "Precedents are for wusses." (Our pResident is a wuss!)

Very funny and almost true!! :scared:

:kick: & recommended
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Wed Sep 28th 2016, 11:05 AM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]

Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (1/22-2007 thru 12/14/2010) Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators

Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC