Priest Bans Autistic Boy From Church

[RamboLiberal]

Source: ABC News

A Catholic priest has filed a restraining order against the parents of a severely autistic 13-year-old boy in an effort to keep him from attending the church in Bertha on Sundays.

The Rev. Daniel Walz alleges that Adam Race's unruly behavior endangers others who attend the Church of St. Joseph.

Race's parents have ignored the restraining order, calling it discriminatory, and Carol Race, Adam's mother, was cited by police and is due to appear in court on Monday for violating the order.

-----

According to Walz, Adam struck a child during mass, nearly knocks elderly parishioners over when he hastily exits the church, spits and sometimes urinates in church and fights when he is being restrained.

He also one time assaulted a girl by pulling her onto his lap and, during Easter mass, ran to the parking lot and got into two vehicles, starting them and revving the engine, Walz alleged.


Read more: http://abcnews.go.com/TheLaw/Story?id=4885322&page=1

---

WWJD?

[Squatch]

Anointing of the Sick

Anointing of the Sick is the anointing Sacrament, practised in the Roman Catholic, Anglican, and Orthodox Churches, of a sick person. It is also described, using the more archaic synonym "unction" in place of "anointing", as unction of the sick.<1> Administration to the sick is used by some Churches.<2>

The chief Biblical text concerning anointing of the sick is James 5:14-15: "Is any among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord; and the prayer of faith will save the sick man, and the Lord will raise him up; and if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven." (RSV)

[MercutioATC]

1. (same response I posted on a thread below)

If this kid is that big and had been disorderly in the past, it's the church's responsibility to make certain they limit the possible harm to other church members. It sounds as if the restraining order was based on actual observed behavior, not a bias against the mentally challenged.

It's an unfortunate situation, but I don't have a problem with the church's decision.

[proud2BlibKansan]

37. I don't either

This kid doesn't belong in church. He obviously isn't getting anything out of it. His parents are idiots for continuing to bring him.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

77. I totally agree

It is an issue of safety -

I know it probably isn't politically correct to say it but the large, autistic boy is dangerous and if he knocks over an elderly person he could kill them. A toddler in his way? Who knows. Sorry but the safety of the people outweigh his right to be there. The priest was pushed to the limit to have to take out a restraining order - It must have been horrible for him.

Why do the parents insist on making this so uncomfortable?

Sorry but keep him at home.

[BellaLuna]

2. I'll get flamed for this I'm sure

BUT if this boy physically assaulting other church goers like this - I agree with the priest.

it is sad to say the least but other church goers deserve to be able to go to mass in peace and not in fear.

Perhaps they can make a 'crying room' type place for him and his family. But he definitely needs to be controlled.

[BlooInBloo]

4. Seems like *some* accomodation should be possible, but maybe not.

[ingac70]

6. Like strapping him down during services?

:evilgrin:

Just kidding.

[treestar]

10. That's what one would think a bunch of Christians would try

first rather than going for a restraining order.

As priests go, I know a lot of them that would have been talking with the parents and working something out.

[proud2BlibKansan]

38. How do you know they didn't try other interventions

before getting the restraining order?

[BellaLuna]

11. It appears they have sat in the crying room I see

and that still didn't help.

I can really see both sides of this issue - they both need to compromise somehow to allow the others church goers to be safe and that family to be able to attend services. However, IF that young man is doing things that endanger others I can see the extreme actions here.

ugh

[BlooInBloo]

14. Yah - assuming everyone has acted reasonably, it's just a tough situation.

[Squatch]

19. Reply #1...

The priest could have gotten off his ass and actually done his job by giving mass at the boy's home. Part of the Catholic ministry is to take the Gospel to those who cannot come to church.

[timtom]

28. That's a great idea.

I concur 100%.

[tuvor]

29. The priest is in the wrong because of something you're assuming?

Nowhere in the article does it say that the priest refused to give mass at the boy's home.

[Squatch]

32. The priest is in the wrong because the parents were still trying to get

their boy to church for mass. So, I think it's safe to assume that mass was NOT given at their home.

[dflprincess]

42. According to the local TV news last night

the priest did offer to say Mass at their home. He also offered to get someone from outside the parish to come in as a mediator and the parents refused.

From what I read here, and heard on the news, I would have to agree with the priest. We expect parents of small children who act up during Mass (or at the movies or in a restaurant) to remove them, I don't understand why a teen or adult who disrupts the service (be it an autistic teen or an elderly person with dementia) shouldn't be expected to leave as well.

[BellaLuna]

33. snort

that isn't a long term solution though. Those masses are for special circumstances with a dying family member etc.

A better solution is to have them watch a TV mass and have a eucharistic minister come in to give them communion once in a while.

Priests are VERY busy in most parishes so getting off his ass to give a pesonal mass isn't always logical.

[Squatch]

39. Those masses are for *anybody* who is sick or infirm

[BellaLuna]

43. Not necessarily

they're temporary solutions. An out of control autistic child does not fall into this category regardless of how sad it is.

Priests simply do not have the time to perform individual masses for everyone how wants one. What would the kid get out of it anyway? Or the parents for that matter if they're constantly trying to control him. The reality of the situation doesn't allow for prayer and taking part in the mass as intended.

When my dad was dying we didn't have the priest at his house constantly because there were lots of other sick people and issues going on. There is a shortage of priests in this country and only so many hours in a day.

[proud2BlibKansan]

40. And you know that wasn't offered ?

[LanternWaste]

50. the priest and other members of the church staff had gone to the boy's home

It would appear to be a mere assumption on the posters part.

However, I did read the story and seems both the priest and other members of the church staff had gone to the boy's home in the past to begin some type of dialog to make all parties satisfied.

I think one could most easily infer that all available options were considered and, for whatever reasons, discarded.

I think this is one of those stories that will arouse one's predisposed indignation and righteous anger regardless of who tried to help who...

[yurbud]

30. a lot of churches have crying rooms now with a speaker from the main auditorium.

there's no reason they couldn't do that.

[BellaLuna]

34. It appears they tried this but it didn't work

.

[yurbud]

48. if the kid is that out of control, what are the parents trying to accomplish by bringing him?

I doubt that he is getting the subtle nuances of the mass.

[DesertRat]

74. No flames from me

I agree with the priest.

[The Gunslinger]

87. If those things are true, I have to agree

It's a sad thing, but if he is a physical threat to others in the church, then I think the priest is in the right.

[sakabatou]

3. See edit

*So I didn't read the whole thing carefully enough.

Alright?

[Beregond2]

8. Don't be an idiot.

There is nothing uncharitable going on here. It is the parents who are being "un-Christlike" if you want to put it that way.

[sakabatou]

12. ...

Omae...

[Journeyman]

13. The fallacy of your contempt is that Christ had power to heal the afflicted. . .

while the Priest has an obligation to protect his flock.

Perhaps you'd be pleased with unruly teens molesting your children and assaulting your elderly, but those of us in the real world look for suitable solutions to life's problems and not hold each other to unattainable standards.

[sakabatou]

17. See edit

[pnorman]

16. Perhaps strapping him to a crucifix?

now THAT would be "Christ-like"!

Seriously, although I'm not a card-carrying Christian, I'd respect the wish of his parent to bring him to church services. But if he's that much of a threat to the others? Perhaps the pastor could go out of his way to "make a house-call" on Sunday?

pnorman

[sakabatou]

18. Perhaps

[ingac70]

5. I agree with the Priest...

everyone else shouldn't be afraid to go to church. That kid will probably end up seriously hurting somebody.

[YOY]

7. If the kid really does knock over elderly parishioners and assault folks in church

Then there really is a reason to not allow him there.

Sorry, nothing "un-Christ like" going on. The kid is dangerous. Perhaps he needs special accommodations. I wonder if they tried that.

[vi5]

9. There's just no good answer to this...

I'm an atheist who was raised devoutly catholic. So while I can't put myself in the frame of mind of either entity, I'm also accutely familar with all involved in the catholic mass and the environment of a lot of churches.

While I can't imagine how disruptive this kid must be, your "wwjd" comment at the end hit the nail on the head. Maybe they could try and make accomodations for his kid and his family.Is there a back room they could use to listen to/watch the mass.

On the other hand, if his cognitive skills are lacking then what is he gaining from going to church? If he doesn't understand what is going on and what is being done or said, why do his parents take him? I feel the same way about parents who take babies and young kids to church as well. If you're taking them because you want to or need to go, then find a sitter or go separately to your spouse/partner/whatever. But why are you taking kids to sit through an hour of recitation, prayer and ritual that there is just no way they'll understand. And also the parents with loud, noisy, disruptive young kids who sit in the main room even though there is a glass enclosed back room where they could sit and allow their kids to speak and act freely.

But I long ago gave up on trying to rationalize why people and why the church put this emphasis on this ritual of repetition and mandatory attendance, etc. It's not my religion and it's not my place and it's not my home. So whatever they want. But I can see both sides of the coin here.

[Oleladylib]

15. One does not need to understand our emphasis on what we

do or do not in regards to our "ritual"...It is ours, it is meaningful and we are here to become better people because of it..This is unfortunate...but, unless a particular room is set aside for those unable to allow the service to go on ..relatively, undisprupted..there should be provisions made at home.

[vi5]

26. And it was mine for 23 years...every week.....

Believe me I saw just how meaningful it was to the hundreds if not thousands of people I encountered in various churches during that time and saw just how much better people it made a good chunk of them become. Including many in my own family.

[NashVegas]

69. WWJD?

Why, Jesus would lay on the hands and cast out seven devils, of course.

But he's not around. The priest is. And he doesn't have quite as much power in the miracle dept.

[rosesaylavee]

20. Sounds like the parents have lost control...

and somehow its the priest's fault? I agree with the priest.

[onehandle]

21. This is common in churches. It's only notable here at DU because it's about a Catholic Church.

Many churches have "cry rooms" for babies and families with problematic kids.

There's a reason.

However this kid sounds dangerous. The Priest did the right thing.

[RamboLiberal]

22. I'd have posted this story about any church, synagogue, mosque

etc.

It's a quandry. I'm siding more with the church on this one. But for any religion who's supposed to embrace all it is a problem.

Solution to me would be for the priest and the parents to come to an accomadation that would allow him to take the mass to them. Even if it wasn't every Sunday.

[onehandle]

49. They will likely come up with a solution.

If you knew Anything about Catholic Services you would know that they make special arrangements for these situations.

He will receive Mass one way or another.

[Deja Q]

54. I agree.

[Richard Steele]

71. Catholic Church or generic Grocery Store, it makes no difference to me.

This kid sounds like he's a danger to others,
and his parents have no right to deliberately
expose the public to that hazard.

I agree- the Priest made the right call here.

[ToughLuck]

23. For me the bigger question is WHO is trying to help this family with this child with severe autism??

Evidently the boy attending mass is receiving little benefit from the experience, so is it the families belief that he is? I just wonder what services are and have been provided for the child, autism is a life long disorder and this young teen needs help desperately. Many people with autism can learn to cope with a range of emotions, it is heartbraking that life is so challenging for him, yet with sufficient and professional help many can have a better outcome than we see here. Perhaps the congregation should ask themselves, if they haven't already, what can we do for this boy, clearly allowing him to attend church for the sake of attending is not the answer.

[depakid]

45. Sadly, this kid will probably end up institutionalized

[Deja Q]

62. Few, if anybody, I should think...

Autism itself is confounding, and some related conditions are only recently accepted by the AMA's and ADA's standards.

The teen does need help and the congregation would hopefully see beyond their fear and help. If possible; for some the impulses are too much to bear.

[kiranon]

73. Agree completely. This child desperately needs professional help.

Somehow this boy has fallen through the cracks. My son is autistic and began receiving services before he was 3. He can go anywhere now but couldn't do so when he was younger. It took a lot of hard work and effort by many dedicated teachers and by my son to get him where he is. It seems that this boy did not have the benefit of such services. Without those skills, he is a danger to himself and others. But, parents cannot be forced to obtain such services and it may be that such services are not available in his community. It's a tragedy for everyone. Perhaps this national attention will help to get him the services he needs.

[ToughLuck]

83. kiranon, that is wonderful to hear about your son, sadly in our country many still do not receive

the services they deserve.

[Journeyman]

24. WWJD? Jesus would heal the boy . . .

absent that solution, however, what would you do to protect the interests and safety of all concerned? That, and not speculation about the possible actions of God's heir, is the problem confronted by those who live in the real world among its very real problems.

[hunter]

25. Why are this kid's parents dragging him to Mass?

What's he getting out of it?

The Pharisees were so completely rigid in their faith they distanced themselves from God.

If attending Mass becomes more important than the well being of this child, and he is disrupting the celebration of Mass for other parishioners, I'm pretty sure God will understand if he doesn't attend.

[yurbud]

31. the parents should hire a babysitter so they can go to mass, and have a priest come over to minister

to their kid at home. Preferably an exorcist.

[KamaAina]

78. You had me going right up until "preferably an exorcist".

A church in Milwaukee tried just that. Result: An eight-year-old boy with autism is now dead.

http://www.channel3000.com/news/2432405/detail.html

The father of Terrance Cottrell Jr. vows to get justice for his 8-year old son -- a boy who was autistic, could barely talk and would often act out.

He died Friday at the Faith Temple Church of the Apostolic Faith.

Members reportedly wrapped Terrance up in sheets, held him down and then prayed over him for more than hour.

Police sources said Terrance was dripping in sweat and had marks on his arms. Members said they were trying to heal Terrance by getting rid of evil spirits.

:grr: :banghead: :nuke:

[undeterred]

75. Good question.

Its probably frustrating for him.

[Tunkamerica]

27. how did he start two cars? n/t

[pinerow]

36. Good question...

nt

[proud2BlibKansan]

35. WWJD?

More like what would Jesus' parents do?

He obviously doesn't belong at church.

I also hate this title (I see that ABC chose it, not you)

It should say
Autistic Boy's Parents Choose to Ruin Weekly Mass By Bringing Their Child

[Freddie Stubbs]

41. This 'boy' is over 6 feet tall and weighs more than 225 pounds

If he is out of control, he would definitely be a danger to others.

[TCJ70]

44. We have an autistic child in our congregation...

...but they've never done the things alleged here. No one really minds either way, but I don't know what would happen if they started doing things like that.

[Quantess]

66. I have worked with several students with autism

and there is a wide range of behavior. Some autistic children and teenagers can be very physically aggressive and can be very disruptive to others. Emphasis on some.

[LeftyMom]

46. If he's that impaired, he's not going to get anything out of mass anyhow

There's no point in dragging this kid to church and creating a scene when he's not going to understand any of it.

More importantly, if the parents don't have any better control than that, something's really going to need to be done before somebody gets hurt. The kid's over 200 lbs, apparently has no impulse control, is violent with others, and going through puberty or will be soon- that's just a recipe for all kinds of horrible shit.

[ORDagnabbit]

47. 225 pounds of urinating, foul mouthed person who also assaults others......sounds bad.

[squawk7700]

51. What would Jesus do? Cure him, obviously.

It seems Jebus doesn't give a shit...as usual.

[Deja Q]

55. What Jesus can't do must be done ourselves. In His name.

(in theory)

Funny how we don't when we claim we would... it depends on your point of view...

[Bill McBlueState]

57. this is what I was thinking

It seems like God or perhaps Jesus could find a solution to this. From what I hear, they like it when Christians come to church, and with all the power they're said to have, they could maybe heal the kid or something.

[Deja Q]

58. Life would be a lot easier if He could...

Mind you, there are reasons to everything. When God cannot, is it not up to us to compensate?

[squawk7700]

61. When there are no gods, it is up to us to invent them.

Which we do with alarming regularity...and variation.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

79. HypnoToad

Did YOU really say "there are reasons to everything"?

Come on.

You never gave me the creeps until now.


:shrug:

[squawk7700]

60. There really is no evidence of any deities that can actually do -anything-. I like this

http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/god-toc.htm

[KamaAina]

52. One wonders if Adam behaves this way all the time

or if there's some stimulus in the church that sets him off (e.g., fluorescent lighting; some people with autism can actually see the 60Hz flicker, resulting in a strobe-light, carnival-funhouse effect).

edit: Hz

[LeftyMom]

56. re: lighting

My son's not on the spectrum, but has some sensory issues that are similar. Back when he was smaller, taking him anyplace with harsh florescent lighting was sure to trigger all kinds of horrible shit. Once we figured out that those lights really hurt him and worked to avoid them (and very loud places, which he also found distressing and painful,) we had a lot less of the public tantrums.

Costco and Safeway were the two places that were the worst. Safeway has since dimmed the lights.

[Deja Q]

59. A logical possibility.

I too am able to see the flicker, but I am fortunate my own malaise only leads me to confusion and distractability. Or at least I know how to channel it to be better utilized; he's still 13 and has other developmental problems.

Still, until he can be developed to work within his limitations (something everyone has to do), restraint is inevitable and necessary.

[squawk7700]

63. Did you write cycles at first? I still prefer that unit name...Hertz had an antenna named for him

decades ago!
:D

I think your funhouse comment is absolutely appropriate. Churches make me want to scream obscenities too.
;-)

[KamaAina]

67. Actually, I wrote Hx

which, in medical terminology, means "history". Note that 'x' is right next to 'z' on Mr. Keyboard. :dunce:

[squawk7700]

68. See, you got my hormones all gyrated for nothing.

:D

I'm watching out for those z-rays. :rofl:

[Deja Q]

53. Where the hell did he get the keys TO those cars? And how'd he know which cars to start,

in such a limited time frame?

Kid sounds like a mess, but there are plenty of neurotypical miscreants as well.

Has anyone determined why he knocks over people when leaving? (anxious to leave an area he feels uncomfortable in because it's full of people?) I'm not entirely rationalizing, but I'm sure there are valid explanations to some of the incidents. For others, it's just beyond his control, which is unfortunate.

Maybe it is discriminatory. A shame there can't be other avenues to explore.

[squawk7700]

64. He's probably a genius/savant who realizes he doesn't want to be among a bunch of

delusional imaginary-deity worshiping hypocrites. I say good for him!

[RamboLiberal]

70. Probably rural area where they're trusting enough to leave

the keys in the cars.

[RedCappedBandit]

65. Maybe they shouldn't be dragging the kid to mass?

:shrug:

It seems to me he doesn't enjoy it.

[Canuckistanian]

72. Here's a question I'm sure I'll get flamed for

Why does a severely autistic child NEED to go to church?

If it's religious instruction or taking the sacracment, I'm sure the priest could arrange private visits.

Otherwise, why does he have to be in the church?

I have an autistic child myself, so I know the issues of "special accomodations". And so far, we've had no issues that couldn't be solved with reasonable compromises from both sides.

[DesertRat]

82. He certainly doesn't need to go to church. n/t

[Book Lover]

84. Because it is the duty of Catholics to do so

Lots of people have said they don't know what Adam gets out of going to church. The Catholic Church celebrates Mass because (they think) God wants them to; Mass attendance may or may not help you attain (further) grace. Worship of God is the point of Mass. It, like so very many other things about the church, is not about you. From this POV, the priest is within his rights, indeed, obligated, to remove any disruptors.

[hedgehog]

76. I did some checking - Rev Walz was ordained in 2003 and has only been

pastor at St. Joseph's since 2005. The timing suggests to me that he has had a problem with the Race family attending Mass with their son since he arrived at the parish. (BTW - Adam Race did not assault a girl, he had an exchange student staying with his family sit on his lap. I think "urinates in church" means the poor kid wet his pants a couple of times). I'd be curious as to how the good reverend responds to crying babies or teenagers in "disrespectful" clothes. It's possible that Adam Race is a hazard to others, but I am not convinced. I suspect a different, wiser pastor would not have any problem.

[DesertRat]

80. The "poor kid" is over 6 feet tall and weighs 225 pounds

I think that the priest has a duty to protect the safety of the other parishioners. "Adam struck a child during mass, nearly knocks elderly parishioners over when he hastily exits the church, spits and sometimes urinates in church and fights when he is being restrained."

In an affidavit, Walz said the church "explored and offered many options for accommodations that would assist the family while protecting the safety of parishioners. The family refused those offers of accommodation."

You're making all kinds of unfounded assumptions about the priest and the situation.

None of us know first hand what is going on. We'll have to watch and see what the court decides.

[hedgehog]

85. I don't know of the truth of the matter, but based on my experience with

Catholic priests, it's possible that Adam Rice is more a threat to Rev. Walz's pride and sense of dignity than anything else. Some* priests are control freaks and tyrannize their parishes if people don't meet their standards of proper respect and reverence. Finding out that the reported "assualt on a girl" was nothing of the sort makes me wonder if the rest of Rev. Walz's report is as much a fantasy!




*Please note - I said some priests; I have known other priests who earn my respect.


Another perspective:

Walz wrote that Adam once pulled an adolescent girl -- an exchange student staying with the family -- on top of him, grabbing her thighs and buttocks. And, at Easter, Walz alleged, Adam ran from the church, got into the family van and started it, then got into someone else's car, started it and revved up the engine.

"There were people directly in front of the car who could have been injured or killed if he had put the car in gear" Walz wrote.

Carol offered a different perspective. She said her son once brushed against a parishioner who almost lost balance. Adam makes spitting faces but doesn't actually spit, she said, and he has an occasional incontinence problem.

She and John sometimes sit on him because their weight is calming to him, she said. He pulled the exchange student onto his lap for that reason, she said, and wasn't grabbing at her.

They also use soft fleece strips to sometimes bind Adam's hands and occasionally his feet because it calms him, she said.

The Easter incident occurred when Adam got into the driver's seat of a car that had already been started and revved the engine because he's drawn to engines, she said.

The family's request for certain accommodations -- such as clearing aisles when the family leaves church -- have gone unfulfilled, she said.

[DesertRat]

86. As a lifelong Catholic

And former Catholic school teacher, I'm happy to say that I have never encountered the kind of tyrannical priest you describe.

I don't think that the parents opinion of what has happened is very helpful here. They obviously want to bring their son to church no matter how his behavior affects others.

The court will have all of the testimony so we'll see what it decides.

[ToughLuck]

81. Thanks for that information hedgehog, I wondered too about how extreme

the boys behavior is, but more important to me is does this child receive services that he desperately needs, if not, I wonder what the church could do to offer their help in that regard...fund raisers etc.