I parked next to a Hummer in the grocery store lot tonight.

[Midlodemocrat]

It was my first real 'up close' view of one. There are a few in my neighborhood, the lovely yellow school bus color, but this was the first time I could get a glimpse inside one.

I have to say. I don't get it. The windows are small, thus reducing visibility and the third seat is very close to the truck/hatch, which means in a rear end collision, there could be serious injuries.

I didn't see a ton of cargo space either, but I didn't get *that* close.

I don't see the appeal. It doesn't appear to be a particularly practical car and Lord knows, it's not pretty.

Enlighten me, oh Great DU?

Disclaimer: I drive a minivan. I have driven a minivan for the last 15 years. (not the same one) I KNOW it's a gas hog, but I need it for carpooling, because of the kids, and I always, always, always combine errands. I think I drive it maybe 3 times a week, especially in the summer. My kids walk to the pool and their friends' houses, which eliminates me having to drive them.

[AtomicKitten]

1. they are cars that people with names like Dick Armey like to drive

n/t

[Mugsy]

50. I don't fit.

Funny, I always thought the College Republicans were the "Dick Army"? :)

In any case: ever sit in a Hummer? I did at an auto show. I'm 6 feet tall and couldn't squeeze in without bumping my head. The most uncomfortable hunk of junk I've ever been in in my life.

[pocoloco]

2. It's a P T Barnum thingy.

[Midlodemocrat]

3. I think that is the part I don't get.

Why not buy, for the same money, a beautiful looking Lexus or a Mercedes?

Hummers are butt frickin' ugly and my peek into this car's interior confirmed that for me.

I have more room in my minivan to haul stuff than this guy could ever even dream of, but I guess it's a 'I'm not a van person' kind of thing.

Yeah, like *I'm* a van person. No, you idiot, it's just the more practical car to have when you're carpooling tons of kids and their crap around.

[LostinVA]

4. Pfft. The future trophy wife once had to park one at Giants' Stadium

Comparatively, it made her FreepMobile as simple as parking a Smart Car.

[Warpy]

24. That's all I've seen driving them around here: trophy wife types

all with jangling jewelry, makeup applied with a trowel, yapping on a cell phone, and looking generally irritated that they got stuck with the pig instead of the small, sporty thing hubby drove to work because it's easier to park.

Not a single person appeared to be enjoying the driving experience. They must be unwieldy as hell, with extremely poor vision and clumsy steering.

Personally, I think owning one of those dick extenders is its own form of punishment, especially when I see them sucking up another day's $50.00 of go juice at the pump.

[LostinVA]

32. Yeah, the future trophy wife hates Hummers -- that's why she wants to buy one of these

More aesthetic.

[silverojo]

41. You *are* joking, I hope?

That piece of crap is as ugly as the H2...only twice as pretentious, given the car maker. :puke:

[silverojo]

40. Yes, they are hard to drive

I know a guy who test-drove one of these, and he said he couldn't believe this tiny bimbos were able to steer the monsters. Apparently, they're harder than hell to drive...reason #2,412 not to like these monstrosities.

[zabet]

5. Chickenhawk coops on wheels. nt

[U4ikLefty]

6. It is the closest thing to a tank that a they can own in public. n/t

[Greyhound]

35. In that case they should fork over the cash for a Humvee, at least they are really

off-road vehicles.

[Warpy]

46. Wrong! Check out the Badonkadonk!

http://www.amazon.com/JL421-Badonkadonk-Land-Cruiser-Tank/dp/B00067F1CE

[EFerrari]

7. I posted once about a running marathon ending right in my 'hood

and how all these Hummer limos were here, backiing up traffic, to pick up the finishers.

It was bizzare!

[Midlodemocrat]

8. I saw a Hummer limo here not that long ago

and I was :wtf:

I guess I'm dense, because I don't get it. I can understand people wanting some luxury in their cars, (hell, my new van is the most luxurious car I have ever owned, or ever will own), but that car is flat out ugly and not that luxurious.

[LostinVA]

13. We're getting a Hummer limo for our wedding

:hide:

[Midlodemocrat]

15. And TeenMidlo is driving it, right?

Dear God. Say no. PLEASE SAY NO!!!!!

[LostinVA]

16. I know you want me to say no but

we're trying to save money.

Your daughter works cheap.

[Midlodemocrat]

17. Yeah. Except it's costing me at least $600 tomorrow

for her damned car. :eyes:

Mom!! The check engine light is on!!!

I hate kids.

[LostinVA]

18. Well, from what I've heard

the service light in the Freepmobile has been on for almost six months.

[Midlodemocrat]

19. MOM!! My check engine light is on!!!!

Toyota service dude: "that usually means the gas cap is loose"

I hate kids. series.

[LostinVA]

22. That's why we have cats

They're bad enough. Haruka wants a German Shepherd, which she says is just like a highly intelligent, overly emotional seven year old. I say it's like a dog that will eat my cat, Punkers.

[Bake]

27. Stretch Hummers are just the UGLIEST!

I mean, can't they afford a Caddy or a Lincoln to stretch? Something that says "This is a luxury limo, dammit, not a long-ass TANK!"

Bake

[Initech]

9. Yellow Hummer H2 = short bus

It's the one car on the road that just screams "Hey look at me! I'm a huge douchebag!"

Personally if I were going to spend that much on a car I'd go for either a BMW 328i or a Mercedes CLS550, or a Mustang Shelby GT500, or something, just not that clunky piece of crap.

[Epiphany4z]

10. we usually see

2 or 3 of them when we are out shopping...what kills me...all that room and its always one skinny little soccer mom all alone driving ...then on our way out of save a lot we usually see at least one parked there.

[Midlodemocrat]

14. See, that is what got me. It didn't look as though there was

'all that room'.

We used to have a Durango. Company car. Sucked gas the way you and I breathe air, but the other reason I hated it was it was a totally shitty car pool car, AND there was no room for suitcases, etc., should you decide to go on a trip.

A lot of the SUVs I see these days have the third seat passengers almost right against the hatch/liftgate and that can't possibly be safe.

Not that my van is the be all and end all of safety, but there IS a nice distance between the hatch and the third seat. Enough space to put all the suitcases a family of five would need for a 2 week vacation.

[Epiphany4z]

26. we have a mini

van too...5 kids ....one in college 5hrs away..it comes in handy ..we paid 200 for it put a $400 transmission in it and its been great...we also have a little Chevy barretta we use when we don't have to haul the entire crew with us or help number one son haul stuff back and forth from college.

as far as room in hummers ...iv been in one and there is a lot of room..but not so much from front to back side to side..i felt like i was a mile away from the driver on the passenger side.

[Warren DeMontague]

11. Same reason "Miracle Penis Enlargement" Pills & Creams are so popular.

Exact same reason.

[IChing]

12. LOL.....DUzy.....n/t

[U4ikLefty]

21. Penis enlargement "creams"??? Now I see a joke there somewhere.

Like instructions that say: "apply cream daily...like you didn't already".

[Warren DeMontague]

37. You know, there's probably someone, somewhere who is THAT unclear on the concept

Whoa! Look! It's Workin'!

[NanceGreggs]

20. It's not the vehicle, it's the price tag.

The first time I saw one on the road (many years ago), I laughingly pointed it out to my son. I said it looked like army surplus junk.

He then told me what they were selling for, and I said that if they sold them for $1,500 each, no one would want to be caught dead driving one.

My son (an expensive-car nut, now the owner of an incredibly over-priced Mercedes) said, "You know, you're right. If they only cost a couple of grand, I would be laughing every time I saw one, too."

In a related story ...

That same day, we passed an old couch that had been sitting on the sidewalk for WEEKS, with a sign that said "free to whoever wants it."

The couch sat there day after day, week after week - even the garbagemen passed it by.

A few days later, the owner of the couch replaced the "free" sign with a sign that said, "For Sale - $5,000". The couch was gone within an hour, 'stolen' by someone who KNEW a five thousand dollar antique when he saw one.

[Midlodemocrat]

23. And, that is, again, something I don't get.

The new Mercedes 'sport utility vehicle', is actually a relatively pretty vehicle and retails for more than the Hummer.

The Lexus SUV is $50,000. Again, not an environmentally sound choice, but at least a more aesthetic one.

And the school bus yellow ones are just hideous. All that money for such an ugly color? Bleh.


JMHO. YMMV.

[The Inquisitive]

25. A fun weekend Hummer experience

My brother had just flew in to Portland so me and a friend of mine went to go pick him up. We decided to grab some sushi, and while searching for a parking spot we go down a narrow one way road that which is home to a semi well known bar in the city. Sure enough one of those big fucking hummer limos is parked in the middle of the god damn road! We get there first and soon after a bunch of cars start piling on up behind it, including us. So here we are laughing as I'm driving my prius, which I so affectionately call the pious (thank you South Park) stuck behind our arch nemesis on the road. Anyway everyone starts honking the horns, and the driver/asshole passengers slowly swagger their "suave" asses back to their McMonster Truck and have the god damn audacity to flip us all off, like we're the assholes for honking the horn to get their tacky POS moving so we can get through.

Hehe, I say this jokingly of course... but for some people, only the law keeps me from killing them.

What is the allure of these cars to some people? I'm not entirely sure. If I had to guess I'd say the majority of drivers are new money, it seems to take a generation before people with financial wealth realize that are most occasions, less really is more. The H2 as far as I can tell can't do anything better functionally than any other car other than declare a complete and utter lack of class, social responsibility, and confidence. I guess if that's what you're looking for in a car... well then look no further...

[zalinda]

28. I was shocked today to see a black guy

driving a Hummer..........yes, seriously. I thought damn, doesn't he know that white people think Hummers are for guys who have small penises? Who is he trying to impress? Maybe repubs, so they'll let him in to their country clubs.

But then, I wouldn't buy a luxury car either. A Volvo is the closest I've ever wanted to luxury car, but now since they've radically changed it's design, it looks more like a Buick. It sucks, I don't like Buicks.

zalinda

[silverojo]

42. I've got a pal who lives in the Philadelphia 'hood

He says LOTS of the black gangsta dudes have Hummers. So I guess it's not true about ALL black men having large penises...! :rofl:

BTW, I love Buicks, and you'll notice a lot of them parked in handicapped zones. The reason? Comfortable seats. These other newer cars have seats that feel like concrete.

[zalinda]

52. I just loved the way Volvos used to look

no offense to Buicks.

zalinda

[proud2BlibKansan]

49. Some of the Chiefs players here in KC drive them

[ronnie624]

29. I've always found it amusing,

that according to J.D. Power and Associates and Consumer Reports, the quality ratings of Hummers are among the lowest in the industry. A Daewoo is apparently better built than one of these monstrosities.

Pure status symbol.

Considering quality issues and fuel mileage, surely only an idiot would buy a Hummer.

[LostinVA]

30. They still make Daewoos?

That company can't even make a microwave properly.

[ronnie624]

31. Interesting information

on GM Daewoo. (although according to the template at the top of the article, the information needs to be updated)

<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/GM_Daewoo>

[silverojo]

43. I'll put a GE microwave up against a Daewoo any day

GE microwaves are the WORST. We bought one that broke down within a week, so we exchanged it for another model. It broke down two weeks, so we exchanged it for yet another. That one broke down after five months.

We now have an Emerson. :)

[pansypoo53219]

33. most of those 'roomy' SUVs is bull.

i am an artist who does some art fairs. i can fita LOT of stuff in a 1999 camry. even more than the 95'. i could NOT fit everything in my uncles SUV. course i had to be carefull of his newish baby. just gotta fuigure out the lugage and cooler for the marquette show.......

[Greyhound]

34. A $60,000 penis extension, so he can feel like a real man.

The saddest thing is that they're just a Yukon with an extra ugly body slapped on.

Pathetic...

[silverojo]

44. Yep, here's a funny (=true) web site about Hummer drivers

STOP ELMER FUDD!
http://www.elmerfudd.us/

[goodgd_yall]

36. The appeal is that it makes people feel like REAL Americans

who can kick ass, scratch their crotch, and belch without ever excusing themselves. Not like those sissy quasi-Americans who drive Priuses.

[sandnsea]

38. status symbol

There are all kinds of status symbols. For some people a prius is a status symbol. For others it's a house in a particular neighborhood, or a $200 haircut. Depends on the person I guess.

[devilgrrl]

39. Did you see the owner trashing it and then blaming hippies?

Just thought I'd ask.

[ellie]

45. Probably

because it makes all those armchair warriors feel like brave soldiers on the front lines without all the inconvenience of being shot and dying.

[leftyladyfrommo]

47. I have a Toyota Yaris - tiny little hatchback - and Hummers and

other giants always park next to me. Then I can't see to get out.

I think they should all have their own parking areas.

[Malikshah]

48. Simple. See image below

I know it's already been mentioned, but a visual always helps. I tend to waggle mine around a bit more when I'm near a Hummer.

[catmandu57]

51. It's to show the world that you're a manly man

A tough sombitch, a real bad hombre. a fucking look at me status symbol, they'll fade eventually and there will be something just as obnoxious to replace them. Some people just can't live without having something that screams look at me, even though the majority of people are laughing when they do look.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

53. Some people need the extra towing capacity...

to haul their over-inflated egos around.