The Lionel Show 06/20/07: What we learned today

[jgraz]

Yeah, I listened again so you don't have to. Luckily, Lionel provides such a target-rich environment that these posts pretty much write themselves.

What we learned on today's Lionel Show:

• Today's show has organically melded synergetic completion.


• In New Jersey, they call mentally ill people "idiots".


• Lionel doesn't know what the Socratic Method is.


• Some dude having something to do with Anna Nicole Smith did something.


• Lionel thinks "defragmenting" is a synonym for "fragmenting".


• Rock Legend, John Kay of Steppenwolf will be on in "Module 3".


• "Born to be Wild" is an "anthem".


• Lionel is still unclear on the blog vs thread thing.


• Lionel's Word of the Day Toilet Paper had "adumbration" on top today.


• Lionel doesn't like it when other people make lame jokes on his show.


• Lionel knows many words beginning with "con", though he can't use any of them properly in a sentence.


• Blogging is devoid of human contact and is about as valid as mumbling.


• Using two or three big words when one simple word will do is not at all boring or annoying. On the contrary, it shows how erudite, how sagacious, how, dare I say, au courant the host is.


• Voting based on hair quality is stupid.


• Voting rights for the mentally ill is a very important issue, but not so important that a radio host should do anything more than the most cursory research on it.


• If you miss a second of Lionel's show, you miss "a lot".


• "Acquitted" and "not guilty" are synonyms.


• Bipolar disorder is a chemical brain imbalance.


• Some Jews in Florida voted for Pat Buchanan in this one election once.


• The third hour of the show will contain a "melange of stuff".


• People with low IQs are nice.


• The answer to the question of mentally ill voting rights is simple, which is why we spent over an hour talking about it.


• The 8th amendment prohibits cruel and unusual punishment.


• Antonin Scalia went to some conference in Canada and said something, maybe about torture.


• When Lionel advocated torture 18 years ago, he was kidding.


• Lionel thinks humans have cloacas.


• Lionel makes jokes sound lame even when he steals them from other AAR hosts.


• Torture is not effective.


• Lionel has attended at least one performance of Les Miserables at some point.


• Lionel is still confused about blog and thread. Now he also throws "post" and/or "poll" into the mix. But it does give him a chance to incorrectly use the word "adhesion".


• When talking about critical testimony before the Senate, it's important to demonstrate that you can correctly and pedantically pronounce Italian names like "Rizzo" -- much more important than noticing that John Rizzo's questioner was actually Senator Carl Levin and not Ron Wyden.


• "Whether or not" is redundant. However, repeating three different multi-syllabic terms for the same concept is not.


• Situations where you're forced to kill one of your parents never happen, but Lionel loves those questions.


• Lionel read an article on J. Edgar Hoover once.


• It is apparently "'tard" day on the Lionel show.


• We should just get Muslims drunk instead of torturing them. Or -- even better -- give them cocaine.


• Muslim guys are named Ahmed and wear either a towel or a burnoose or whatever. They are, however, quite amusing when intoxicated.


• Lionel thinks men have pudenda.


• Michael Bloomberg has withdrawn from the Republican party. The key point about this is that there's a picture going around the internet where Arnold Schwarzenegger is wearing a strange belt buckle. (yeah, he really said that)


• Lionel adds an "air of respectability" to the network.


• Dale Watson is the last hope to maintain the integrity of country music.


• Dale Watson wrote a song about Lionel. I think it's an "anthem".


• Chris Matthews said a bad word yesterday.


• It was pretty cool that Chris Matthews got heckled when he pressed Hillary Clinton for an answer on the Libby pardon.


• Rudy Giuliani's "big guy" in South Carolina was indicted for selling crack cocaine and, by the way, Bernie Kerrick had a meltdown and then the Pope sent out some driving guidelines.


• Mentioning these facts in a shallow, rambling stream-of-consciousness narrative makes Lionel's show worth paying for.


• There are several "Judge Shows" on T.V.


• This has something to do with the Anna Nicole Smith dude doing something.


• Whatever the Anna Nicole Smith dude did, it merited about three times as much airtime as John Rizzo's testimony on secret CIA renditions for torture.


• Rock Legend, John Kay of Steppenwolf couldn't be bothered to call in on time because he was watching cruise ships dock.


• But "Born to be Wild" is still an "anthem".


• Lionel likes to make jokes about slapping female interviewers. Rock Legend, John Kay of Steppenwolf didn't laugh.


• Did we mention that "Born to be Wild" is an "anthem"?


• Booking Rock Legend, John Kay of Steppenwolf on the show is enough of a coup. There's really no need to study his bio or even prepare questions ahead of time.


• "Born to be Wild"? Anthem.

What we didn't learn on today's Lionel Show

• The name, position or even a single statement of any legislator or interested party associated with the mentally ill right-to-vote issue.


• What was actually in that article Lionel read on J. Edgar Hoover.


• That track 7 on Dale "Integrity of Country Music" Watson's 2006 album Whisky or God is "Truckin Queen", a violently homophobic song about a male transvestite trucker.


• The history, context or even more than 3 bars of the song "Born to be Wild". (anthem)

[MalloyLiberal]

1. Listen to Stephanie Miller instead please :)

[jgraz]

2. I can do both :)

And welcome to DU

[Fridays Child]

3. Sounds like every women's magazine I ever picked up.

On their covers, they all promise earth-shattering revelations but the insides could not be emptier of substance, if the pages were blank.

[jobycom]

5. Coincidentally, I was thinking that if he were a woman, he'd be called all sorts of bad names

and be treated with complete ridicule as people suggested that he was only hired because of his looks.

[jgraz]

7. Nobody could ever think Lionel, male or female, was hired for his looks

[jobycom]

9. It was more a commentary on sexism

Whenever a woman is bad at her job, she's vilified, usually in terms of stupidity and promiscuity, but when a man is equally bad, he's just considered bad, and not attacked in such degrading terms.

[jgraz]

16. If it will make you feel better, I'll be happy to attack Lionel in degrading terms

[jobycom]

4. He didn't call any 8 year old girls whose fathers died tragically "psychopaths" today?

Maybe he's improving. With therapy and unemployment, he could turn out alright, maybe.

[jgraz]

6. Wow, I missed that one

[jobycom]

14. I think it's Steve Irwin's daughter.

I only listened to him a couple of times before dumping AAR altogether (sadly). But for a couple of days a couple of weeks ago he was on some kick about "Bindy," who seems to be Bindy Irwin, Steve Irwin's surviving 8 year old daughter. He would screw his voice up into a little girl's voice with an approximation of an Australian accent and say "I never cried when my father died," and then he would laugh uproariously at himself, and make comments about the Omen and her being a psychopath. One caller even told him he was hilarious and that she thought the same thing, and they went on about how her mother couldn't control her, and seemed frightened of her.

That may have been the last routine I heard him do, in fact. Couldn't stomach him after that. Coudn't stomach him much before that, either, but the Bindy remarks convinced me he wasn't a person I wanted to know any better.

[Strelnikov_]

32. Now that's some hard hitting 'Progressive' radio right there

(long Borat pause)


NOT!

[XOKCowboy]

8. He really does suck..

When I think that Sam's been downgraded to a Sunday show to make room for this idiot I really don't have much faith in AAR 2.0 or whatever they call it now.

[NYCGirl]

10. You're funny. You remind me of that woman who was so outraged by "Married

with Children" she started a whole organization to stop it, and only succeeded in getting it better ratings.

[jgraz]

12. Somehow I doubt that I'll get Lionel better ratings

But, yes, I am funny.

[NYCGirl]

13. I mean funny peculiar, not funny ha ha. And Lionel's ratings have always been

very good.

[jgraz]

17. And McDonald's food has always been popular

That means they MUST be the best restaurant in the WORLD!!!!111

I better go cancel those reservations at Chez Panisse.



Edit: Missed a couple lttrs

[NYCGirl]

20. Reality: Lionel makes money for AAR. Sam didn't. AAR is a business, it must

make money to survive. And, BTW, remember that guy over at WFMU who championed Marc Maron and Sam? He LOVES Lionel.

http://blog.wfmu.org/freeform/2005/05/wartime_lionel.ht...

[Strelnikov_]

23. "Lionel makes money for AAR"

Yea, right. He's been on, what, five weeks, and has been a real 'hit' with the progressive community.

Guess they had to destroy progressive radio to save it. "Hey, Mr. Advertiser, he's safe, he's not a liberal".

Then again, how would you be privy to this inside information? AAR public relations staffer? That would explain a lot.

[NYCGirl]

24. Destroy progressive radio? Doesn't AAR still have Hartmann, Rhodes, Maddow,

etc.? Do you have to be serious every minute of the day?

No, I'm basing that on the fact that Lionel had a very big audience before he came to AAR — judging from the callers, many of them followed him to AAR. Hence, a big audience.

It would be nice to work for AAR, but I do not. I just listen to it.

[Strelnikov_]

25. No, thats why I liked Sam

He was funny, and informative.

Lionel is simply more of the typical smarmy, egotistical AM talker. Like the airwaves didn't have enough already.

But, hey, it's a big world. Probability is there are people out there that don't think Mr. Lebron . . . oops . . . 'Lionel' is an asshole like I do.

[NYCGirl]

27. Obviously, there are lots of people who don't agree with you.

TV shows get cancelled, radio shows get cancelled and people move on. Isn't it good that Sam is on Sundays? Better than not at all. Maybe he'll get a weekday gig somewhere else and you can hear him every day again.

[Strelnikov_]

28. Some. Yes. Lots? Highly doubtful.

Judging the response to Lionel by the DU community, I would have to say the majority feels Mr. Lebron . . . oops . . . 'Lionel' sucks.

[NYCGirl]

29. The DU community is not necessarily representative of the entire world.

In some ways that's good, and in some ways that's bad.

[Strelnikov_]

34. No, they are not. But they are representative of the 'Progressive/Liberal'

community.

And considering that AAR is supposed to be 'Liberal Talk Radio', I think the verdict on Mr. LeBron . . . oops . . . 'Lionel' is in.

[NYCGirl]

37. We shall see if that verdict is in. NT

[Strelnikov_]

40. Oh, I would say it's in.

Mr. Lebron aka Lionel sucks.

[NYCGirl]

41. And they say Liberals have no sense of humor. NT

[Strelnikov_]

42. Anyone who listened to Sam's show would know they do

Anyone who listed to Mr. Lebron aka 'Lionel' would confirm their long held belief that Libertarians are generally smarmy assholes.

[NYCGirl]

45. And I never found Sam all that funny, good but repetitive. Never laughed out

loud funny — even the failed TV series of his they used to show on Trio TV.

http://www.answers.com/topic/who-s-the-caboose?cat=ente...

Edited to include info on Seder's other series shown in Trio:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0424697 /

[Strelnikov_]

46. I find Sam to be very funny

whereas Mike Lebron aka 'Lionel' just comes across to me as, well, an ass.

[NYCGirl]

48. I guess Sly was right — "Different strokes for different folks", right? NT

[WillyT]

43. Personally NYCG... They Should Have Given Sam Al Franken's Slot, And Put

Hartmann on the weekends.

The trouble with the business model, is that if one is more interested with making money than in getting out an effective progressive message, one could put Limbaugh, Hannity, Jim Rome, reruns of The Shadow, etc. on the air. But then you wouldn't have the product you purported to sell us. The product we actually want.

[NYCGirl]

44. Right. They have to give the investors what's in the business plan.

So they won't be putting on right wingers any time soon (with the exception of Armstrong Williams in NYC, whose contract came with the NY station; fortunately, he has a Liberal partner and hopefully, the contract will be up at some time in the future).

[jgraz]

51. What investors? See, logic only works if you have your basic facts straight

The Greens bought the network. There are no investors. Just the Mark and his rich brother. So they can pretty much do whatever they want.

Hence the hour-long schmooze-fest with Arianna.

[jgraz]

30. how do you know this?

The Q2 ratings aren't even in yet

[NYCGirl]

31. I'm just counting on the facts that the Greens are good business people.

As I said above, Lionel had great ratings when he was at WOR — judging by the callers, many of his listeners have followed him to AAR. That can't be a bad thing.

[jgraz]

33. ah, so you actually just pulled a factoid out of your butt

thanks, just checking.

[NYCGirl]

36. I am using logic. NT

[jgraz]

52. So I assume you know what Lionel's WOR ratings and demos were

Cuz, once again, logic only works if you have your underlying facts right.

Besides, wasn't LeBron on at night in WOR? And I'm guessing he wasn't part of a network who had already sold itself to affiliates as "progressive talk". What does your logic tell you about that?

[annabanana]

47. WOR's audience?

Hey.. are you Lionel's producer?
('Cause really. . he's not THAT good. He really doesn't give the audience much credit, or think that they might know MORE about any given subject than he does.. The difference is quite staggering when he's followed immediately by Thom Hartmann)

[NYCGirl]

49. No, just an Air America listener. Here's a radio professional who loves him,

though (and he championed Maron and Seder, too):

http://blog.wfmu.org/freeform/2005/05/wartime_lionel.ht...

[jgraz]

53. A radio professional, you say? Wow. Ok, I completely abandon my own opinion

Cuz God knows, those radio professionals all have great taste.

(Do I really need it? All right.... )

[jumpoffdaplanet]

26. That's not what I've read

Maybe you could point to these very good ratings because I doubt they exist.

[smokey nj]

11. In NJ, they call mentally ill people idiots? .....

I never got that memo.

[Loki]

15. Reminds me of WillPitt's FauxNews listening marathon

jgraz, ive written AA emails about this idiot, hopefully those of us who listen will let Mr. Green know how we feel. Lionel is a waste of air space. Is this really the best that New York progressive radio has to offer?

[jgraz]

18. Yeah, I don't know how much longer I can keep this up

But anytime you criticize Lionel, the brainless hoards accuse you of "not really listening" to him. So I'm gonna listen for a while and then see what they have to say.

[KoKo]

19. I'm paying for XM Satellite and AAR can't get it's Shit Together after THREE YEARS!

They mess up their schedule and replace Sam with this POS to draw in the "Swing Vote?" I wonder who the hell they have as Pollsters checking their "Swing Vote."

[devilgrrl]

21. Wow, that's some hard-hitting shit...

Thanks for listening, so I don't have to.

BTW, you should hear the windbag that took over Randi's spot when she went live in Los Angeles.... Mark Germaine. Defends union-busting, Wal-Mart, etc... one show was about nude beaches.... Unbelievable.

[Canuckistanian]

22. I'd like to say "thank you"

For listening to Lionel so we don't have to.

I used to listen to him quite a lot on a night time airing of his program (a long drive home from work).

For amusement, I used to time him on when he actually got around to making his "big point of the show", which was usually around the half-point of his second hour.

There were a few times that he never even reached that point.

[Viva_La_Revolution]

35. ooohhh! ooohhh! Do "Big Eddie" next, PLEASE?

frigin drives me nuts, calling himself the "#1 progressive Radio host"

He ain't 'Progressive' and he ain't #1

and today, he dissed the Code Pink ladies for booing H. Clinton for supporting the troops! (all of which was a lie, wrong info, and he dissed a caller who tried to correct him)

[jgraz]

38. ah no...one brain dead moran is enough for me

but i'd love to read what you come up with

[Strelnikov_]

39. Is that where she blamed the 'Iraqi Government'?

Pretty fucking sad. Blow up a country, kill 600,000+, displace 4M+, occupation troops who 'did their job' allow a sectarian Civil War to break out. But, hell no, it's the fault of the occupied.

Hey, she's like the Mr. Lebron . . . oops . . . Lionel of politics. Progressives/liberals gotta like her cause she's all we got.

Gonna take one hell of a nose pin come 11/08. Wonder what Coroners use to mask the smell . . .

[Viva_La_Revolution]

50. yep.

that's what really happened, and yep, I'll need that nose pin.