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BushOut06 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:26 PM
Original message
Title Dubya's autobiography
Assuming that * decides to write an autobiography, what would he title it?

"I Did a Heckuva Job"

"So Little Time, So Few Countries"

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Radical Activist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:29 PM
Response to Original message
1. Stumbling into Infamy
That sums up his life.
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MannyGoldstein Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:29 PM
Response to Original message
2. Batshit Crazy, But Nobody'll Stop Me n/t
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Poll_Blind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:30 PM
Response to Original message
3. "My pet war." n/t
PB
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GrumpyGreg Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:30 PM
Response to Original message
4. "It's Hard Work"
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Cessna Invesco Palin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:31 PM
Response to Original message
5. The Declaration of I'madumbass
Other possible titles:

Oops!

Thing to do in Washington When You're the Decider

Profiles in Strategery

It Takes a Village Idiot

How to Destroy a Decade of Peace and Prosperity, Immolate the Middle East, and Destroy the Middle Class Without Even Trying.

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IggleDoer Donating Member (601 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:32 PM
Response to Original message
6. Slouching my way to Armageddon
n/t
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Cleita Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:32 PM
Response to Original message
7. "I'm the Decider".
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Cessna Invesco Palin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:34 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. I've got a slight twist on that.
Decider: The Decisions I Decided and the Way I Decidered Them
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Cleita Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:35 PM
Response to Reply #8
10. Excellent!
I like!

:thumbsup:
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Cessna Invesco Palin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:43 PM
Response to Reply #8
13. More...
It Was Cheney's Fault
(With special introduction by Donald Rumsfeld)

Donald Rumsfeld is a Big Fat Idiot
(With special introduction by Dick Cheney)

Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld are Both Big Fat Idiots
(With special introducion by Colin Powell)

This is the Last Time We Let a Negro into the Republican Party
(With special introduction by Trent Lott)

How To Lose Congress Because You're a Bunch of Corrupt, Racist, Warmongering Assholes. Especially Trent Lott.
(With special introduction by Karl Rove)
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GreenPoet64 Donating Member (897 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 11:13 PM
Response to Reply #8
58. From Bottle to Bedlam n/t
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JackintheGreen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 06:34 PM
Response to Reply #7
45. goo goo ga joo
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Ayesha Donating Member (587 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:34 PM
Response to Original message
9. "What, me worry?"
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Ghost in the Machine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:39 PM
Response to Original message
11. Tour de Farce!
That's what his pResidency has been.... a big farce and a cruel joke played on us and the rest of the world.
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krispos42 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:42 PM
Response to Original message
12. "How I Stopped Nukler War Against Amerka"
It will be a picture book of his impeachment trial
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aint_no_life_nowhere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:44 PM
Response to Original message
14. "Monkey Saw - Monkey Could Not Do"
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lisa58 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:46 PM
Response to Original message
15. My Life is a Lie...
...that might be too honest
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Bozita Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:46 PM
Response to Original message
16. How about "A Charge to Keep"? ... Have Karen Hughes write it.
Be sure to check the reviews at Amazon. Hilarious!

http://www.amazon.com/Charge-Keep-George-W-Bush/dp/0688...

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Cessna Invesco Palin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:52 PM
Response to Reply #16
20. How about "A Charge on Which to Be Indicted." n/t
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Cooley Hurd Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:50 PM
Response to Original message
17. "Mommy Said I Was Bright: Confessions of a Blithering Idiot"
Subtitle: "But Mommy Drank and Made Me Scared."

:rofl:
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Cessna Invesco Palin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:53 PM
Response to Reply #17
21. Profiles in Unmedicated Shithattery. n/t
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newyawker99 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:03 PM
Response to Reply #17
26. LMAO!!!!
:rofl:
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Cooley Hurd Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 07:24 AM
Response to Reply #26
66. Hiya Roni!
:hi:
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vireo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:51 PM
Response to Original message
18. "Dumb Like Me"
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TlalocW Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:52 PM
Response to Original message
19. "Stupid Came I"
That's a reference to a Bloom County storyline where Milo took Opus' boring autobiography, "A Penguin's Tale," and "punched it up a bit," renaming it, "Naked Came I." Opus was surprised to learn that he had shot Warren Beatty in the buttocks. Milo said that, "Must be a typo."

TlalocW
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Lautremont Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:54 PM
Response to Original message
22. Forgive Me, I Beg Of You.
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CurtEastPoint Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 04:59 PM
Response to Original message
23. And Amazon customers would tag it with....
Edited on Fri Dec-15-06 05:03 PM by CurtEastPoint
these adjectives and perjoratives. I was thinking about making a pun of GWB writing something like "The Presidency: If I Did It, Here's How I Would Do It" (a la OJ) and I Googled that phrase and found a link to Amazon. Apparently it was put on Amazon before it got cancelled. LOOK AT WHAT PEOPLE WROTE ABOUT OJ! I can only imagine how they would tag the * Biography! And surprisingly (NOT!) many would be the same!! And this is only A through E!

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malaise Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:01 PM
Response to Original message
24. How the fugg did I pull this off :
Edited on Fri Dec-15-06 05:02 PM by malaise
The Greatest Con in American History

Edit: add
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rurallib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:02 PM
Response to Original message
25. "It was all Clinton's Fault"
subtitled "and Dick Cheney made most of the bad decisions"
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tinfoil tiaras Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:04 PM
Response to Original message
27. Cheney's biography: "I'm With Stupid--how I became the real president of the USA"
y'all have already taken all the good * biography names. But good job. :)
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krispos42 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:08 PM
Response to Original message
28. "Stupid Does as Stupid Is" n/t
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Divernan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:10 PM
Response to Original message
29. The End of Western Civilization As We Then Knew It
nt
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Hanover_Fist Donating Member (130 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:11 PM
Response to Original message
30. "SIMPLETON"
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aint_no_life_nowhere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:22 PM
Response to Original message
31. "I once caught a great big fish, while doin' some Presidentin' 'n other stuff"
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slater71 Donating Member (586 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:26 PM
Response to Original message
32. DUMB ASS! How not to succeed in anything .
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Junkdrawer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:31 PM
Response to Original message
33. "My Pet Goat Ate My Autobiography." n/t
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KamaAina Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:35 PM
Response to Original message
34. A Misunderestimated Life
from the publishers of "Sex After Sixty" and "Six Hundred Years of German Humor". :P
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omega minimo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:37 PM
Response to Original message
35. "Read My Apocalypse"
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La_Fourmi_Rouge Donating Member (878 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:37 PM
Response to Original message
36. "Blow Me"
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GreatCaesarsGhost Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:56 PM
Response to Original message
37. Barney and Me
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melissinha Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 05:56 PM
Response to Original message
38. My Daddy got me this [insert any damn thing here]
I mean really, what has he EVER done successfully and on his own merit? Absolutely nothing.
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muntrv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 06:00 PM
Response to Original message
39. "My Stratergy To Go Nookuler"
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judaspriestess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 06:06 PM
Response to Original message
40. I'm just a simpleton or I did it my way, stupid
Edited on Fri Dec-15-06 06:10 PM by judaspriestess
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Buck Rabbit Donating Member (999 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 06:09 PM
Response to Original message
41. "Writin' Books Is Hard Work"
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rebel with a cause Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 06:12 PM
Response to Original message
42. "Me and Condi, and Laura too"
"Americans Are Stupid, Tell Them Anything"; "What Carl Rove Told Me"; "Cheney Was Not My Boss!"; "My Daddy Cried For Jeb, But Not For Me"; etc
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SoCalDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 06:16 PM
Response to Original message
43. Iraq is a country. It has oil. War is hard work. I'm a war president
Edited on Fri Dec-15-06 06:16 PM by SoCalDem
he always reminds me of the 5th grade kid who has to stand up in front of the class for a book report on a book he obviously did NOT read :)
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rebel with a cause Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 06:19 PM
Response to Original message
44. "How to Lose A War and Destroy Two Countries
Without Really Trying"
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muriel_volestrangler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 07:10 PM
Response to Original message
46. My Autobiography: That's a Book about Me that I wrote Myself, Ya See
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ikojo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 07:16 PM
Response to Original message
47. All about ME


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omega minimo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 07:17 PM
Response to Original message
48. "Inside The Bubble"............. or............. "Travels With Turdblossom"
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Bobbie Jo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 07:21 PM
Response to Original message
49. "Fool Me Once, Shame on You"
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Riddler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 07:27 PM
Response to Original message
50. "The Life and Times of a Total Failure"
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Lautremont Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:47 PM
Response to Original message
51. My Name Is Georgie I Live In The Building
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IDemo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:56 PM
Response to Original message
52. Postcard from Paraguay n/t
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kitty1 Donating Member (772 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 11:02 PM
Response to Original message
53. War and War
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Dinger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 11:05 PM
Response to Original message
54. O.K. . . .
"I Blow Goats, And I Have Proof"
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kitty1 Donating Member (772 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 11:06 PM
Response to Original message
55. Bush; The life and Crimes
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Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 11:06 PM
Response to Original message
56. How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love to Bomb.
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BlackVelvet04 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 11:07 PM
Response to Original message
57. Stupid is as Stupid does. n/t
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krispos42 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 12:48 AM
Response to Original message
59. "A Treatise on the Art, Science, and Finer Points of Brush Clearing in East Texas"
n/t
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gr8dane_daddy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 12:55 AM
Response to Original message
60. Strategerizing for Dummies
nm
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Warren DeMontague Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 12:58 AM
Response to Original message
61. "Who crapped in the refrigerator?"
I don't know what that means, but it sounds about right.
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rknryd Donating Member (45 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 01:19 AM
Response to Original message
62. :Me, Write?"
:rofl:
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enigmatic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 01:21 AM
Response to Original message
63. "Mein Stratergy"!
:)
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madeline_con Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 01:28 AM
Response to Original message
64. Funniest stuff I've read in a long time!
:rofl:
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Fire Walk With Me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 02:06 AM
Response to Original message
65. "Mo' Money, Mo' Money, MO' MONEY!"
BAAAAAAAAAM!
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maine_raptor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 07:55 AM
Response to Original message
67. "If I Did It"
Said book to be filled with reasons why all his fuck-ups are someone eles's fault.
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SAXMAR Donating Member (247 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 08:09 AM
Response to Original message
68. 'I Punked My Country for eight whole Years"
Hehehehe, Me and that ashee Kutcher really got you guys. Oh man you should have seen your face when we got the Supreme Court in on the joke and they let me win the vote in 2000.

Anyway, you can get it on WMD OR VHS for christmas.

Happy Holidays

The Deciderer
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screembloodymurder Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 08:18 AM
Response to Original message
69. Forrest Gump goes to Washington
Simple is as simple does.
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NoPasaran Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 09:30 AM
Response to Original message
70. "Oedipus Wrecks"
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spanone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 09:32 AM
Response to Original message
71. How I Fucked America.
Edited on Sat Dec-16-06 09:33 AM by spanone
...and all my rich freinds got richer than their wildest dreams.
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BringEmOn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 09:40 AM
Response to Original message
72. Sins of the Father
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npincus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 09:44 AM
Response to Original message
73. "Destined For Destiny"- it's out already.. HILARIOUS
http://www.amazon.com/Destined-Destiny-Unauthorized-Aut...



I have the audio CD- like a 5-hour SNNL skit, only funnier. I gave it to my sis as a gift- she and her family listen to it over and over again!

From Amazon:


Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly
In the tradition of Jon Stewart's America: The Book and satirical newspaper The Onion (which Dikkers runs as editor-in-chief), this faux autobiography recounts George W. Bush's mediocre rise from humble beginnings (as a child of "simple oil folks") to become the 43rd President of the United States. Dikkers and Hilleren play on every Bush stereotype, from his privileged insider perspective ("I believe in tax relief for Wal-Mart and other large department store chains which clothe and feed the poor") to his close and personal bond with his savior ("Hello, Jesus, my name is George W. Bush and I'm asking for your support in my run for Congress"), in a voice studded with Bush's trademark malapropisms. The authors also include fake artifacts, including newspaper clippings, White House memos and Bush's Yale admissions essay (complete with a note from Dad). Though the gags are often as sharp as they are stupid (chapter titles include "Then I Ran Some Companies into the Ground," "George Walker, Texas Ranger," and "The Clown-Faced Zombie I Call My Wife"), readers may find the joke wearing a little thin by the time they reach the 16-page photo spread of Bush with Jesus Christ. Readers may want to skip around to prevent satirical fatigue.
Copyright Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist
Underscore unauthorized. Dikkers, founder and editor in chief of the satirical publication theOnion, and Hilleren, former public radio producer, joined to craft this humorous look at the life of President George W. Bush, as if penned by the forty-third president himself. They chronicle Bush's privileged childhood, his uninspiring academic performance, and his rise to wealth and influence in business and, finally, politics with the help of family connections. Written in imitation of Bush's breezy style, the facts are all there, but the tone is heavily satiric. Illustrations include a report card with grades altered, a loyalty oath signed by Laura Bush, and--after Bush's proclaimed religious conversion--the presence of Jesus in photographs of his life from babyhood through the presidential swearing-in ceremony through his speech at ground zero after the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Bush detractors will find this book hilarious; his fans will be apoplectic. Vanessa Bush
Copyright American Library Association. All rights reserved

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