Fellow GD Du'ers - what is the worst screw up you ever made at work/home?

[The Straight Story]

Me: I accidentally changed the passwords of all the people at the call center while trying to remap their drives. Was no biggie, but was dumb. I fixed it, and it was so complex my boss just shrugged it off (as he knew I had been working 17 hours on the entire project that day, and this was minimal.)

Then we come to bush.

Think for a minute all he has screwed up, from day 1. And he IS STILL ON THE JOB MAKING A LOT OF $$$.

How many have suffered and died due to his poor performance? All in the name of saving American lives.

Was Iraq ready to invade and kill us all?

Next time you make a mistake at work, and especially if your boss is a RW nut job - keep a list of bush's screwups and ask him/her why they voted to keep his ass in office but want to discipline you.

From the environmental policies to war and restricting freedoms, he has been a total washout. But still makes the big money and has a personal chef, staff, etc.

Would that I could screw up so much and have so much. Sheesh.

So if you have messed up, don't beat yourself down to hard or let others do so :)

[mike_c]

1. I once blew up an entire country and murdered hundreds of thousands...

...of innocent people.

In a computer game.

[proud2BlibKansan]

2. I was working part time retail

and I had to close the store. I set the alarm code wrong and the cops were waiting for me as I walked out the door of the store. They had to call the store owner at home to have him verify that yes, I did work there and it was okay for me to be coming out of the store after it had closed.

The other girl I worked with got in way more trouble than I did because she had left early and I was alone at closing, which was a big no-no.

I have probably made worse mistakes at work, but this is the one I always remember because it was so embarrassing.

[EFerrari]

3. I left my front door unlocked, and was robbed by a burglar

on a hot prowl while the family slept.

If I hadn't woken up in time, it could have been much worse.

[The Straight Story]

4. Damn - glad you were all safe! (nt)

[EFerrari]

5. Guy did time. Just as I hope Bush will do for stealing us blind

and trying to get us killed. :evilgrin:

[AlamoDemoc]

6. Regrettably, as a lone officer, I approved loan for the wrong costumer once...

a loan worth 5000$ by mixing-up paperwork...fortunately, the bank discovered the error, but I was sleepless for a week during the process.

[The Straight Story]

7. So....can you approve one for me :) (nt)

[Left Is Write]

8. Oh, I'd say the time I accidentally did production on the air...

and got particularly vocally angry at the copywriter for giving me too much copy for a 10-second spot.

Two big no-nos there.

[kiahzero]

9. I once said "World War II" instead of "World War I"

Given that I was talking about entering a war without much in the way of provocation, it was rather embarrassing.

[The Straight Story]

10. Well, at least you did not say 'Mission Accomplished'! ;) (nt)

[kiahzero]

12. A fair point. (n/t)

[azygous]

11. I accidentally set myself on fire

two weeks before I was supposed to retire from my job as a park ranger. There was a huge brush dump I didn't want to leave unburned before I went, so at noon on a hot 117 degree day I decided to torch it off. The park mechanic, when learning I was going to burn the dump, gave me a can of old boat gas to dispose of. I poured the gas out on one end of the 50x50 foot brush pile while prepping the opposite end with diesel fuel to start the fire. Well, I lit the wrong end and I went up in an explosion of flames. I was lucky to have burned only my legs from my knees to my ankles and half the hair off my head, but I retired with second and third degree burns. My superior told me that if I wasn't retiring he'd probably have to fire me. I guess I went out in a "blaze" of glory.

[nonconformist]

27. Yikes, how scary! Glad you are ok now, and welcome to DU! nt

[Jed Dilligan]

13. Mailing a 2 million dollar check to the IRS,

without realizing my boss had yet to transfer the funds to his checking account. (The balance was in the hundreds!) Not really a big problem: he just called the bank president and asked him to hold it on his desk for a couple of days. Life is pretty easy for the rich.

[man4allcats]

14. Well, there was that time the LSD got the best of me,

and I fell out the living-room window of my one story house and landed in the shrubbery. The neighbors called EMS. I don't why. I think they thought I might get some snap and try to come over and visit with them in my "condition." No chance of that. I was way beyond snap.

:hippie:

[alfredo]

17. I took LSD too late one night, went to

a Black Sabbath concert. Partied afterwards, and drank some LSD punch. I had to work the next morning at the phone company. I was still tripping like crazy. It was cold, snowy, and I was sent out on a job to splice a three hundred pair cable. I was working with a religious fanatic who was determined to save me. We were sitting in a canvas tent, facing each other across the two cables to be spliced.

There was a breeze and even in the tent it was blowing through. The breeze caused the color coated wires to move around. It was like sticking my hands into a bundle of bright colored snakes. I also had to wear a headphone to listen for signals from the office. I was using a probe to find which wire was sending the signal. Between the dayglo dancing on the other guy's face, his preaching, the snakes crawling around my hands, and the breeze flapping the the canvass tent made for a weird day.

[man4allcats]

20. Sounds like

a truly religious experience to me. :-)

[alfredo]

25. It was.

[spacelady]

21. That story made the inside of my head scream. Well Done!

[alfredo]

24. That story was brought to you courtesy of many

dead brain cells.

[selfdestructive]

22. best story ever

my lord that is graphic and hilarious

[alfredo]

23. It wasn't any stranger than riding a fully loaded touring

bicycle up a mountain just as some peyote kicked in. I heard approaching riders. I turned my head and it was the Mexican Olympic Cycling team. I kid you not.

I was sure they knew I was tripping.

I had just finished a long cycle camping trip in the Rockies. I stopped in a vegetarian restaurant and had a bite to eat. I stayed a bit and bused tables for them. They showed their appreciation by giving me a peyote smoothie. It was the worst thing I ever tasted. I hung around down on Pearl st for a bit BSing with some other cyclist and then decided to head back up the mountain to where I was staying. That's when the Peyote kicked in.

I wasn't hallucinating the cycling team. They were in town for the Red Zinger Classic, a bike race that Started and ended in Boulder Colo.

[selfdestructive]

26. "I turned my head and it was the Mexican Olympic Cycling team."

Now there is something you don't hear every day. bahahahah
that's just classic man

[alfredo]

40. They did look funny, something like clowns on a spawning run.

[Dora]

51. "clowns on a spawning run"

:rofl: You should write poetry!

[alfredo]

55. That comes from spending many an hour riding in pelatons.

[lumberjack_jeff]

43. "a peyote smoothie" Yuk! LMAO

[alfredo]

50. very bitter.

The rest of the day went well. I sat on the porch and listened to the clouds hiss over the Flatirons.

I bet you didn't know clouds hissed as they passed over mountains, did ya?

[unhappycamper]

38. LMAO!

I know the job & can only imagine how your day went. Moral of the story: don't play on a school nite.

[OzarkDem]

42. Never again will I see

a canvas tent with telephone workers inside splicing cable without thinking of that story.

Good one. I've not tripped many times in my life, but I can't imagine having to go to work in that condition. :rofl:

[alfredo]

54. One other time I was up a pole with another worker.

we were using our gaffs to keep us up there. We were doing a splice. Right after we got belted in, he pulls out a hash pipe. I was OK until I tried to climb down. The pole curved away from me. It was very tricky but I made it down OK.

[sandnsea]

34. Oh my god - was that you??

I was at a party in Ashland back in 1974 and some guy did that. He was sitting in a chair one minute, and fell right out the plate glass window the next. Weirdest thing I think I've ever seen at a party. If it wasn't you, at least you know you're not the only one!! :rofl:

[man4allcats]

36. And here I thought I was so unique.

My God, there's two of us!

:wow:

[Wwagsthedog]

15. Put an 11 stitch zipper in my right thigh with a chain saw once.

And no, I won't elaborate further except to say that it didn't stop me from trying to cut the rest of the tree off of my garage. What a mess. It was all Hurricane Alicia's fault.

[alfredo]

16. Punching a Supervisor.

[jgraz]

30. Damn -- how many others wish they'd made that mistake at some point?

That would be me.
:evilgrin:

[alfredo]

39. It's the tie. It cuts off blood flow to the brain. That's my only

explanation for why bosses act like dick-heads. A fist in the face reestablishes blood flow to the head. Look at it as something like the heimlich maneuver for assholiness.

[lumberjack_jeff]

44. Before or after the peyote smoothie? n/t

:hi:

[alfredo]

57. Before. I joined the Army right after losing that job.

It was the Vietnam era and a draft age man could not get a job of any worth. I was too poor to camp out in college or buy my way into the National Guard. Canada was too cold, and Sweden too far.

[seabeyond]

18. i worked payables major corporation. i was going on vacation and ran

all the checks. left them on the boss desk and he signed and had them mailed. i got a call that i had run ALL money owed, not just the ones i was suppose to. that was a lot of extra money. they had to get the money to cover it in the bank

though i always wondered why my boss didnt realize he was signing payable that shouldnt be sent out or and extraordinary large amount in checks going out for any given time

ah well,... i can shoulder the blame on this one.

and i didnt get fired, lol

[Horse with no Name]

19. I ran camera at a TV station

and didn't realize it was long credits that day--show went undertime.
I locked my camera down on an empty chair and took my headset off and proceeded to get on the stage and start cleaning it up--unaware I was on-air during the entire time.
Of course since I had my headsets off--I couldn't hear the director yelling at me.:blush:
But I didn't kill anyone.

[napi21]

28. MyGod, after reading all these stories, I feel like I had an extremely dull life!

The worst thing I can recall was setting the kitchen on fire. Ihad something cooking on the stove(which was next to a window with curtains)and I went to the basement to throwsome wash in the washer. When I came back up to the apartment, it was full of smoke I guess the meat Iwas cooking had cooked dry and spattered and caught the curtains on fire,traveled up the wall and into the ceiling. I was a newly wed and too embarrassed to call the fire deptNEXT DOOR, so I grabbed the pot off the stov, ran to the sink and filled it with wate, and threw itupon the flames. I did this often enough that I did get the fire out. Worst thing was cleaning everything after all that smoke!

45 years ago, and I still remember!!!!!

[QMPMom]

29. It was my first job ever. I was the cook's helper for the noon

meal in a nursing home and main cook for the evening meal. For a couple of hours after lunch I was by myself working before the evening cook's helper came in. One day the dessert for supper was pumpkin pie. I had both ovens going and 6 pies in each oven. 6 pies on large trays that were the same size as the oven racks. One oven of pies was done several minutes before the other so I removed them.

And dropped the entire tray on the floor of the kitchen.:blush:

I cleaned the pies up and washed the floor area and by the time that was done the second set of pies in the other oven was done. I removed them from the oven and.....dropped them smack in the floor, just like the first six!!!:blush: :banghead: :blush:

[cynatnite]

31. Gave a truck the wrong load...

cost the company about $20,000. Boss chewed me out, but cut me a break since I was still in training. She said they resold the product so it wasn't as bad as it could have been. They could have lost a million dollar a year customer, but didn't. I felt so bad about it and made sure I double checked every single load for the rest of the time I had the job.

I like your logic. :)

[alittlelark]

32. I did not recognize how screwed up my ex college roomates were

Either of them. One committed suicide via automobile - her parents were able to reconcile it as an accident.... I and others knew better. Missy still has shoes, dried flowers, and an obituary on an 'alter' in my house.


Tamara was 12 years out of college, bought a gun and blew her brains out last year w/in 6 hours of the gun purchase. She was a cool roommate. We got together about every 6 months or so....I had no idea... Her death will mess w/ me for the rest of my life.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

33. Do disastrous marriages count???? n/t

:rofl:

[sandnsea]

35. Gave my husband and employee salmonella

They were sick for days. The sad thing was, his employee went out drinking after dinner and thought it was the booze what done it. Swore off drinking 'til he found out it was my bad cooking.

It really wasn't my fault. I had left turkey in the oven on warm and the salmonella just grew and grew and grew..

[SoCalDem]

37. I spilled coffee into the only working calculator in the office on my first day of work

:)

[maxrandb]

41. Very early in my Navy career

a shipmate and I walked back to Fleet Landing with two girls we had met and partied with. We missed the last liberty boat for the night, and the girls offered us a ride to the ship in their little skiff.

The Quarterdeck Watch saw us coming. By the time we got to the top of the Accom Ladder, our Master Chief Petty Officer was standing there in his shorts, T-shirt and "flip-flops" with a cup of coffee in his hand. He chewed our asses up one side and down the other. He called me everything but a human being.

I ended up not having to go see the CO, but spent the next month of duty standing the "balls to four" watch.

We were lucky. In today's world, a .50 Cal would have taken us out before we even got close to the ship.

[grizmaster]

45. set off the smoke detectors which sent 400 people out in cold

and drizzle.

I set up elaborate decorations for Halloween every year in my area in the office. So a few years ago I got a smoke machine to add to the mix. I'd used them before in clubs and it was never an issue, but not this time. I had just finished setting up the display, gave the smoke machine a little test shot, and 10 seconds later the fire alarm went off.

It was cold and drizzling and we were outside for over a half hour because the firemen couldn't find the cause (I did fess up to my boss but she decided to cover for me) or the "faulty" detector.

Mucho embarassing as the story spread around the building, but I still crack up remembering it.

[Beausoleil]

46. ???

I wish you'd have given me this written question ahead of time so I could plan for it.

I'm sure something will pop into my head here in the midst of this thread, with all the pressure of trying to come up with an answer, but it hadn't yet.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

47. I once ran fsck on a critical root filesystem while it was in use. Geeks will understand.

I was inexperienced, I swear!

[porphyrian]

48. I'm a bit of a failure connoisseur, and it's nearly impossible to say which is worst.

"Worst" is relative to so many other factors.

[slackmaster]

49. I did a Reply to All to about 5,500 emails in a call center system

The system was a glorified email client that tracked customer service communications, routing them to Help Desk people.

I wasn't trained on the system, and got asked to dive into it to investigate a problem.

I did something wrong, and the sonofabitch sent out auto-replies like "Thank you for your recent email. A customer service representative will be contacting you shortly..."

Some of the messages were over a year old. Nearly all of them had already been handled.

My punishment was to have the ceremonial Can O' Spam on my computer monitor, until someone else did a major production screwup, at which point that person would inherit the can.

[in_cog_ni_to]

52. When I was in High School I was a waitress at a smorgasbord

and I was working the banquet room where the tables were huge. I had a family of about 15 people and I spilled an entire tray of pop/lemonade on the head of a 4 year old little girl. I cried over that for the rest of the day.:cry:

As an Optician, I made many, many mistakes in prescription translations, adjustments, repairs and things like that, but those are NOTHING compared to what the idiot has done. In the Grand Scheme of things, nothing any of us could do in our jobs/home could compare to what the asshole has done to the world.

[sweetheart]

53. on Guardian90 in 1986

(super.super)\CQS.$SYSTEM.SYSTEM>FUP LISTOPENS \MSI.$FOX

The command was executed on a Tandem TXP processor running B30 Guardian 90
back in the 1986, but \MSI was running B20. The command was an administrator command to check the number
of applications that had open a particular logical device, "$FOX" (a fibre optic link).

However, i discovered in that command an operating system bug when 2 different
versions of the operating system were running, and the logical device was
opening and closing its file descriptors faster than the system process inquiring,
causing the operating system to lock up and crash.

Had i not been logged in as the administrator on the NASDAQ production
front end "CQS -Certified Quote System",
i would not have caused the stock exchange to go down for a second.

My boss was standing right there at the time, and when the command hung, we
tried pulling the terminal out of the wall, in hopes that it would not execute,
and then the loudspeaker came up at the nasdaq offices in trumbull, connecticut,
'code T' which mean the tandem had crashed, and all relevant staff run to the
computer room.

It was an honest mistake, big oops though.

[kid a]

56. lost temper on bus full of drama students - said STFU

many years ago..i was new teacher, new drama coach, new to travelling with 45 theatre kids in a cramped bus...

3am...bohunk montana...5 moountain dew wired teens having too much fun in the back of the bus...my young assistant goes back and tells them to quiet down, she turns around and gets a skittle in the back of the head... i head to the back of the bus and quietly tell the back two rows ... when a coach, director, or any teacher asks you to be quiet...be quiet...when I have to come back here at 3am after multiple warnings...you better shut the fuck up!!!

had hell to pay with principal monday morning :(

[bobbolink]

58. Being born.