How to evade punishment for ANY crime

[ck4829]

1. Become a Republican

2. Check into Rehab

That's it.

[Orrex]

1. Very true. But failing that...

1. Become President
2. Have your spineless, enabling Congress retroactively declare your crimes non-crimes.

[zbdent]

2. On #1

Have a grandfather who was a Senator (who managed to come away clean despite dealing with Nazis) ...

and a father who not only was the Vice President and President, but was in charge of the covert operations - the CIA - long enough that they named their headquarters after him DURING THE TERMS OF A DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENT ...

[Orrex]

4. Gee, I was really lax in my preparation

I was totally careless in my selection of ancestors.

[htuttle]

3. Just say, "I forgot"

"I forgot that I had to pay taxes."

"I forgot that Grand Larceny was against the law..."

(to quote Steve Martin...)

[zbdent]

6. "Well, ex-cuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-uuuuuuuse

MEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!"

[Rocknrule]

5. I think "Become a Republican" should do it

Or "Become a Republican" and "Find religion"