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My boss's brother came back from Iraq two weeks ago

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ariellyn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 05:40 PM
Original message
My boss's brother came back from Iraq two weeks ago
I saw him for the first time today and talked with him briefly. He is/was a highly competent, spirited manager of a large office. He ran missions in Iraq dodging IEDs for about a year and told his sister stories of nearly having to kill children to save his own crew.

I told him I prayed for him and was glad that he made it home. But his eyes show that he left a part of himself overseas. He looked...sad. He says that he cannot come back to work yet, because he is not prepared and he said he has learned that there a lot of things way more important than a job. His sister, my boss, is still overseeing his financial affairs.

I don't know what else to say except that I feel sad for him because its obvious that war takes a toll even on those who survive.





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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 05:43 PM
Response to Original message
1. There are no survivors in war
No one comes out totally alive.

War is an antiquated way to deal with differences. We should be ashamed of ourselves for not being able to come up with some better way after all these centuries.

That is such a sad story. My heart goes out to him.
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Hav Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 05:45 PM
Response to Original message
2. .
There must have been some really depressing events for him. The people around him better take care of him.
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sutz12 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 05:45 PM
Response to Original message
3. He should consider therapy....seriously.
My nephew did two tours. He can't hardly sleep for the nightmares. He's got PTSD big time. He's been in a VA facility trying to get some medication worked out that will help him function.
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 05:47 PM
Response to Original message
4. I'm glad he's back, but I'm sure your assessment is correct.
He left a part of himself over there. Even if someone wasn't physically wounded, there are psychological wounds to deal with. I hope this man can find some sense of equilibrium.
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calico1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 05:50 PM
Response to Original message
5. I remember seeing a documentary
some years back and they were interviewing a WWI veteran. He was well into his 90's at the time. He was recalling an incident where he lost a bunch of his buddies and his voice cracked and he had tears running down his face. All these many years later. I hope your boss's brother gets some therapy and doesn't try to just tough it out by himself. And I hope he is okay.
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InternalDialogue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 05:56 PM
Response to Original message
6. What a choice:
Find yourself in a situation where you might have to kill children or see your buddies killed.

That's a choice that would scar anyone, whichever way it goes.
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Mnemosyne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 06:39 PM
Response to Original message
7. knr n/t
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annabanana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 06:44 PM
Response to Original message
8. "No one 'wins' a war"
.. is what my Father told me. He was among the first of the allies into the camps in Germany after we 'won'. He has never talked about it and has to leave the room if the subject comes up on documentaries on TV. This is the only evidence I have ever seen of his scars.
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Selatius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 07:08 PM
Response to Reply #8
13. You can tell somebody who really saw something horrible in war
They're the war vets who hardly ever talk about their experience. It's hard to relive it just by retelling it. They keep the shock bottled up inside.
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Habibi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 06:48 PM
Response to Original message
9. KnR
Maybe it's time to volunteer for vets organizations.
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SpreadItAround Donating Member (265 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 06:49 PM
Response to Original message
10. War sucks
It makes me sad to think about it.

Hope this dude gets well.
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bonito Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 06:58 PM
Response to Original message
11. Tell him many of us understand
And that from he's experience he is better able than most of us to change the future for our children. peace
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tblue37 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 07:07 PM
Response to Original message
12. One of my friends in the Reserves was sent over
Edited on Thu Oct-12-06 07:10 PM by tblue37
when he was 37. His son was 8 years old at the time. (My friend had also been in the first Iraq war.) He came home a year later (almost 2 years ago now) and his life has been downhill since then. He is now divorced and is suffering from major PTSD. He is actually kind of scary now. I know that his life was ruined by that year in Iraq.
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UrbScotty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 07:19 PM
Response to Original message
14. Thoughts and prayers to him and his family...
...and to all who are there and who have come back.
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demigoddess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 07:20 PM
Response to Original message
15. my father fought in WWII and Korea and my dad in Korea
And I know for a fact no man who fights in a war comes out unscathed. They spend the rest of their lives changed. And usually their lives are never the same again. Both my fathers died young also, cancer and other diseases come from battlefield time and their consequences. Also I know for a fact that Vietnam vets had children with birth defects (agent orange) and Gulf War vets had a bunch of children born with defects (probably du) and this group should have a lot of handicapped children and lots of cancers etc. when they come home. War in reallly expensive in that way, that is why we should never go to war for a BOONDOGGLE (military slang for a useless exercise that is done in order that the higher ups get rank and glory)

my heart goes out to those guys. I remember the time that my dad got the news that he was going to die an early death.
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stevedeshazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 07:29 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. Yes, my dad was a WWII vet, and his uncle was tortured by the Japanese
They lived the rest of their lives trying to cope.

War must end.
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CrispyQ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 08:22 PM
Response to Original message
17. I have no words.
I cannot even imagine.
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Liberal In Texas Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 08:23 PM
Response to Original message
18. The Thousand-Yard Stare.
"...his eyes show that he left a part of himself overseas."

See wiki:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thousand_Yard_Stare

Damaged citizens that will live for a full generation. People that the RW doesn't want to, or won't, give the needed support to for the problems they will have for the rest of their lives. The agony these people suffer from war will affect their children and the society they live in, perhaps for generations.

This is the legacy of George W. Bush and the people that supported this stupid stupid war.



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OrangeCountyDemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-12-06 08:32 PM
Response to Original message
19. Don't Mean To Sound Insensitive
Is he someone who feels as if we belong there?
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specimenfred1984 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-13-06 02:31 PM
Response to Original message
20. The "look"
Almost everyone I've seen who came back from there has it.
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misternormal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-13-06 02:33 PM
Response to Original message
21. Anyone that is sent to war...
Edited on Fri Oct-13-06 02:33 PM by misternormal
... will ultimately be changed by the experience.

I pray that he and all of the returning service people will eventually be ok... I know some never will be and that is a sad by-product of war.

Bless them all
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