Damn! What am I supposed to do at Code Red SEVERE?

[Philosoraptor]

I'm down to one roll of duct tape, I have no gas mask, I only have 6 firearms, I sold all the creamed corn I had stocked up for Y-2K, I made my survival shelter into a storage room, and I'm running around the house in a panic.

I've never been under a severe threat level before, how am I supposed to act?

[theHandpuppet]

1. Creamed corn?

Damn, I hope you're well stocked on TP or things could get really grim.

[cc488is]

2. We're not under code red.

Just US flights going to the UK.

[iamahaingttta]

3. I used to work in a supermarket...

...and when someone got on the loudspeaker and announce "Code Red" in meant there was a hot chick somewhere in the store.

[gaspee]

4. Run! Run for your lives!

And run over the handicapped and children and slowpokes while you're at it. Oh wait, that's what conservatives do. My bad. Buncha whining scaredy-cat crybabies.

[zbdent]

5. Curl up into a fetal position, start sucking your thumb,

quit your job, tune in to ONLY FOX news, and never, ever, EVER

vote for a Democratic candidate ...

[ticapnews]

6. A reminder of what each threat level means

[EFerrari]

7. I'm returning my NetFlix. Just in case!

[AndyA]

8. You can do what our fearless leader does, you know the one - the

guy who's "tough on terror." You can go on vacation, and hide in the fetal position in a closet at your ranch in Crawford, Texas.

Oh, you don't have a ranch in Crawford, Texas?

You can't afford to take a vacation? Gas is too high?

Well, then you're not worthy, so it doesn't matter what you do...

[katsy]

9. what to do?

Like who cares.... what should I wear to a code red?????????

[ChazII]

10. How about

causual Friday attitre?

[Cobalt Violet]

11. Shop, just keep shopping.

Shop and shop and shop and shop.

[pointblank]

12. "Colonel Jessup, Did YOU order the code red"

"You''re GODDAM right I did, you little snot nosed punk"

[Sherman A1]

13. When in Doubt

Run in circles, Scream and Shout!!!!

[proud2BlibKansan]

14. We are okay now

The bad guys were arrested.

Just don't take no liquid on an airplane. So empty your bladder before boarding.

[obreaslan]

15. Whatever you do, make sure you "DO THE DEW!!!!!"

[Brewman_Jax]

16. You forgot sunscreen

I'm sure you don't want code red skin.