how does one find a GOOD therapist?

[Duppers]

A psychologist, not a psychiatrist? How do you interview them and what questions should I ask?

Also, has anyone read "Love & Will" by Rollo May? I'm a fan of his.

Thanks.

[EFerrari]

1. That's the gazillion dollar question, isn't it?

In my case, I just kept interviewing people until I got lucky. (Emphasis on "lucky")

It took us nearly a decade to find a reliable therapist for my husband and she turned out not to be so good.

It's good to see you posting, Duppers. I love this forum because there are a bunch of dear kind people here.

Beth

[ncrainbowgrrl]

2. Gosh, I wish I knew.

Have an EXCELLENT couples counselor.

I don't usually do well with talk therapy, though. I'm kinda like Will in Good Will Hunting. It's not like I read up on the person- it's just that some people are so transparant that you almost WISH that they would work harder to challenge you. If they don't, I'll give 'em what they want to hear. Which doesn't help anyone.

A long time ago, I saw the covering Psychiatrist (very non-med focused) for my then-psychiatrist. I saw her 2 or 3 times. By the last meeting, she said "I bet you're glad that Dr. L. is coming back." To which, I responded, "actually, Are you sure that you're not projecting? She turned RED. Of course, she said no...but her body language screamed "I can't wait to get rid of you as a patient. So, of course, I had to ask her the same question. She said something like "Oh, no- I've enjoyed our time together," with her eyes peeled to the floor. I asked her if there was a bug on the floor that I could kill for her- she seemed intent on watching something.... Her eyes SNAPPED back to me.

Anyow. I need to go to bed- exhausted and it's 6am!

night all

[Deja Q]

3. Trial and error.

For years, if not DECADES, I knew I was different...

But not until I was 33 did my concerns get validated.

I knew I was not what I had been diagnosed with.

And those who have A.S. are often misdiagnosed with far more disturbing maladies. I mentioned those once, and the DUer who heckled me with since then... well, he's on my 'ignore' list.

[EFerrari]

4. You got that right, Hypno Toad.

:thumbsup:

[MinneapolisMatt]

5. It took me almost 8 years.

My advice: after one meeting, you'll know if they are the right person for you.

If it's not "clicking" do your best to find someone else.

(I know that's not always possible with insurance shit, but see if you can get them to refer you to someone else if possible.)

Also, know before hand what kind of person you are most comfortable talking to. Male? Female? Youngish? Older? Do you have a specific issue that they can deal with? Are you GLBT? Any specific trauma? It helps to be as specific as you can be...it also helps weed out the people that won't be able to help address your specific needs.

Hope that helps. After my 8 year struggle, I'm finally, and *almost*, back to my old self. I wish you the best of luck. You can get better! I never, ever thought I'd be able to say that, but with the right doc/meds, I'm on my way.

xoxo Matt :)

[Duppers]

6. Thanks, Matt and all

My crisis is over after many a tearful day. I could write volumes about my life's woes and this latest one is just one more chapter.

I'm not the newcomer to therapy as my original post lead ya to believe. I was in therapy many, many years ago and I literally owe my life to a very sensitive therapist in another state. Curse fate that we had to make a job-related move. I've found that the people AND the therapists in this part of this state are...well, just idiots.

Btw, Matt, I do have one screening question: have you ever doubted the existence of god?
I've not found one shrink expressing the right answer (for me) yet, so I'm just prodding along, reading everything I can and gently nudging my family members to be honest. It's so damn difficult when your 20 yr. son won't be honest with you when he's in a major crisis. Perhaps I value true openness and honesty too much.

Ah, now on to another day, like most folks, striving for acceptance, understanding, and meaning.


:)