why is my cat trying to murder me?

[newsguyatl]

i used to think it was cute when i first got him that nikko would walk on my face early in the morning to wake me up -- and when that didn't work, sit on it...

well now, in addition to sitting on my face, in an attempt to force me to either suffocate or get up and feed him, he's taken to stepping down hard on my jugular and sitting there -- literally stopping the blood flow.

to top it off, he purrs loudly while he does this, making it seem as though he's oblivious to the trickery.

anybody else have a fiendish feline?

[mopinko]

1. this is why i have dogs. nt

[Lorien]

2. He sure is a beauty!

My Oberon use to try to mate with my head-ugh! He's a huge animal, so it wasn't a safe situation. Now he has a life sized Bernese Mountain dog plush toy that he mates with (and he's neutered, to boot) I guess that makes him a furry, lol!

Maybe an additional kitten would help? Sometimes a cat can get too needy or demanding if he's left alone during the day. I've found that two are actually easier than one.

[newsguyatl]

5. lol

thank goodness he hasn't started mating me...... yet :scared:

[underseasurveyor]

3. He is a Be-U-tiful boy

I see yours goes for the direct - paws on - murder approach :evilgrin:

I have one, he tries to make it look more like an accident ;-) His favorite is to silently sneak up and sprawl out on the floor (ever so innocently of course) about 2 inches behind you. Then just 1 second after you begin turning to go the other way, THAT'S when you suddenly realize another smashing round of 'Tripping the Humans For Fun Game' has just begun. This is especially fun to do in the kitchen when there are various hot and boiling items about the place. No doubt, the Kitty-Games must be as entertaining as possible and pulsating with danger and excitement. But remember it must look like an accident and no witnesses:evilgrin:

Then like a dummy whose welfare am I concerned with this whole time as I'm trying to catch myself from breaking my own ass? Mine? *Pfft* Heck no! Wouldn't wanna accidently squish or injure the kitty that started all this fun in the first place ;-)

But my horror has not ended. I must stand and face the worst part of the Kitty-Games :scared:
For after I have regained my composure and balance, I am scowled upon and scolded for disturbing HIM in HIS spot as if it were MY fault :wow:

Mister~M~, he'll always be my Sweet Baby Boy~M~ :loveya:
;-) Kitties. Gotta luv em!

[newsguyatl]

4. LMAO!

that is HILARIOUS!!!

they're conniving suckers aren't they?!

sometimes, i feel like I'M the pet and HE'S the owner...

[underseasurveyor]

6. And he manages to trip me on average

3 to 4 times a week too that sneaky little imp. So if any mysterious accident does happen to me remember these important clues,

Mister~M~ did it,
in the kitchen,
with his own fluffy butt.

;-)

[Zuni]

9. They are your owners

they quickly turn the tables on you

[demnan]

7. Cats really have a mean and devious sense of humor

that is one of the reasons we love them so much. Pad Thai goes over to the Boise radio and turns up loud the most obnoxious station he can find - Lily, like Nikko, is a suffocator.

[ehrnst]

8. He's probably read the "Training your Human" manual...

http://www.kittyvillage.org/funny/humantraining.asp

[newsguyatl]

12. HA!

that's hilarious! and so fitting

[Eurobabe]

10. He sure is pretty!

Look at those ears, he does indeed look slightly devious! ;)

[CornField]

11. Did you marry his original master?

LMAO!! My husband's cat (Jennifer) does these types of things to me. She loves to nip at my chin or eyebrows while I'm sleeping and to sit firmly on my face first thing in the morning. At one point I tried to win her affection by making her things. The last straw was a crunchy sack I made for her -- she peed all over it.

[newsguyatl]

13. nope, i'm his only owner

hope that's not a bad sign!

ha