I talked to the mother of one of my students a few days ago

[dsc]

and it was all I could do not to scream at her via the phone. He is one of the ones in the GSA and he is continually being rejected at home. She called me about another matter, and I am not even sure she knew who I was at the beginning of the conversation, but I couldn't help but think how many parents would consider themselves blessed to have this kid as a son. He is smart (NHS smart), has a beautiful singing voice, very nice, and deeply involved in his school and community. But none of that is good enough for her. She wants him cured. No I didn't scream at her but I so wanted to. Just needed to rant a little, so to speak. In the meantime I am helping him find funding for college incase his parents won't pay (they are threatening just that).

[hedgehog]

1. Oddly enough, he may be better off if they fail to support him.

Provided he could get some grants, at least he wouldn't graduate with a pack of student loans!

Blessings on you for being there to be a supportive adult and role model!

[dsc]

3. thanks

[Mythsaje]

2. "There's no more a cure for HIM than there is a cure for you."

Of course, in YOUR case there's some hope for something we like to call 'enlightenment.' But he will always be gay. You can continue to make it hard for him, or you can actually show some human decency and support for your own child rather than trying to drag him down. I realize that it's a lot to ask, but there's always hope."

I imagine that there's some religious thing involved here. There almost always is. It's so nice how religion becomes such an unassailable refuge for the emotionally and morally handicapped among us.

For some people it seems to provide a stairway to self-improvement. For others it's something they can crawl into and remain beyond the touch of anything remotely resembling human decency.

How sad.

[dsc]

5. I am hoping they come around

but this has been going on for a few months at least. He seems to be taking it well but I know from experience it isn't fun.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

4. I'm so glad he has you!

It is so sad when families won't allow a child to be themselves.

[dsc]

6. thanks

[Warpy]

7. Make sure that college is far, far away from them

They may never grow up and accept their son for who he is. The geographical "cure" will put distance between them and allow him to set the number of toxic doses of parental disapproval he can handle.

Parents reject their children for all sorts of reasons. Being GLBT is only one of the most common.

[dsc]

8. Economically it might have to be close

My state has very reasonable tuition at its state universities.

[lupinella]

9. Thank You!

My religious high school never had someone there who I could talk to regarding my suicide attempts caused by a pervasive society of intolerance. In fact my principal told me that attempting suicide proved I was not a Christian. My parents would only agree to help with university if I attended Liberty college and majored in something other than theatre.
I still haven't finished my degree and have major student loans, but I am a better and more sane person for following my own path. How I wish every student that has to struggle with evil parents and uncaring schools would be given the gift of someone like you to help negotiate the perilous trek from high school to college; someone to help them see that they deserve respect not condemnation. I cannot thank you enough for what you are doing for him.

[dsc]

10. thanks

and I am glad you have found your own way. Good luck to you.

[DarkTirade]

11. It never fails to amaze me how horrible some people can be.

How can someone bring that kind of irrational hatred and discrimination against their own child?

I just don't get it.

[dsc]

12. I could live to be a thousand and not know why

it comes close to breaking my heart.

[NMMNG]

13. That poor young man

It's sad the level of hatred and oppression that bigotry fosters. I only hope that he can escape with a decent self-esteem. So many end up with significant damage from what they endure at home. :-(

[LeftCoast]

14. DSC, I know you're a professional but please be careful in this situation (and I'm sure you are)

I would hate to see the parents misdirect their anger (kid being gay) toward you.

Thanks for being there for this kid though. Wish I'd had some support like that!

[dsc]

15. I am being careful

I just make sure he is OK when I see him, and give him websites and other info as I find it. I do think his parents will come around but you never do know.

[Tyler Durden]

16. "But, but...Donnie and Kirbyjon say JESUS will CURE HIM!!"

The longer that sort of nonsense isn't called the bullshit it is, out loud, in public, BY PEOPLE IN POWER AND THOSE WHO WANT TO BE IN POWER, young people in this country are in JEOPARDY.

Congratulations on taking a stand for a future AND PRESENT person of value, as all people are persons of value.

[MuseRider]

17. Yah, take away the college fund.

That will do the trick. :eyes:

I am sure glad he has you. He sounds like a good kid so what are they so upset about? People like you will get him through this intact and I bless you for that. People like you will have the best chance of bringing them around. Having been in his shoes and being as supportive and smart about all this as you are and seemingly having the patience of Job you are the very best person they could ever be in contact with. Good luck. If you can't do it then it was never going to happen anyway but you are still there to get him through this. How anyone could be this way to their own child, or anyone else's for that matter, is beyond me.

[dsc]

18. I was actually on the verge of leaving this school, over admin issues, until

the gay straight alliance came up. Now I know that a group of kids are really depending upon me so it would take dynomite to get me out. This kid will be OK, I just am hoping his parents come around sooner rather than later.

[MuseRider]

19. You saw a need

and you filled it and are enriching the lives of all the area by doing so, even at the expense of your discontent with the school. That is what it is all about don't you agree? What in the world are we good for if we are not helping others?

You remain my hero. :loveya:

[dsc]

20. On this issue I really can't fault the admin

they have backed me bigtime and even the religiously conservative faculty haven't give me any grief. You are the hero here though. I am still amazed when straights work so hard for gay rights.

[MuseRider]

22. Naaaaah

I see no difference (cue Colbert I suppose) between my rights and yours. I have usually been the underdog and fought against oppression all my life (I grew up female in a very archaic family) so I know when the man has his boot on someone's neck. I don't like that. In fact I will fight hard against that therefore I am doing this. My special affinity for "gay" rights is personal of course and you know about it as most do. It simply comes down to this, it is the right thing to do. Nothing special about what I do or other straights, it is simply the right thing to do. :)

Thanks though. It is kind of you to always say that.

We always seem to end up in a Chip and Dale conversation :). "NO! After you!" "I beg your pardon, you should go first." "I think not!"

[soleft]

21. Heartbreaking

[qb]

23. I have to stop reading these posts about parents rejecting their children.

I'm about to start crying at work. I can't fathom not having the love and acceptance of my parents. My heart goes out to your student, and thank you for being a great teacher.