11 Things The Bible Bans, But You Do Anyway

[HarveyDarkey]

Written by 11points

Yesterday, I found myself in a discussion about the anti-abortion people. The reason: It’s just incomprehensible to us that people get so zealous about that issue that they’ll go as far as to murder doctors who perform abortions and bomb abortion clinics.

The conversation then took its natural turn to selective, self-serving interpretations of the Bible… finding a few verses that you can use to justify a position that lets you impose your morality on someone, and riding those verses hard and fast for the rest of your life.

So I thought it’d be a good time to find a bunch of stuff that the Bible bans… stuff that’s a lot LESS convenient. Don’t worry, though… just because I’m pointing it out, that doesn’t mean you now have to follow it. It’s a lot easier to keep discriminating against gay people for no particular reason than to stop eating bacon, after all.

Here are 11 things that are technically banned by the Bible. (All quotes are translations from the New American Standard Bible, but, because I’m actually trying to maintain serious journalistic integrity here, I cross-referenced several other translations to make sure I wasn’t missing the point.)

1: Round haircuts. See you in Hell, Beatles… and/or kids with bowl cuts, surfer cuts or (my favorite) butt cuts. Leviticus 19:27 reads “You shall not round off the side-growth of your heads nor harm the edges of your beard.”

http://www.bspcn.com/2009/06/23/11-things-the-bible-bans-but-you-do-anyway/

[RandomThoughts]

1. hadn't heard that one before.

Is that haircut verse a new verse?

Is that why they had the young darth with a bowl hair cut in the crap star wars films?


Although it makes me think on the story of Sampson, and how that story supports secrecy. As the new testament comments on a secret doctrine.

You know what I think the secret caveats are about, it lets you decide what is what. It makes it so any person can decide what that 'secret thing' might be.

From that it becomes a choice by the person, and allows for many traps, or better paths.


And nobody told me I had to keep any secrets, and know that occult means secret.

So really picking and choosing has lots of faults in it.

Hence why literalists are really just doing what they want anyways, then claiming it is by divine instruction. And what is worse, if you want to pick and choose, what is the only unforgivable sin?

Also why I say each person should decide what is inspired and what is not, becuase I can find bias in many chapters. Bias about the social time of that era, and bias of those that transcribed much of the verses. So good and bad in everything, from that you have to think and feel on it.

[Drale]

4. Leviticus was a messed up dude

and probably had a right wing mentality. A man with a round hair cut probably did something to him, so he decided to try and ban it.

[dimbear]

12. Possibly a distant forebear of Moe Howard. n/t

[laconicsax]

5. "Is that haircut verse a new verse?" Really?

Have you ever read the whole Bible?

[RandomThoughts]

6. That is a long story.

Not the Bible being the long story, but the question if I have read the whole Bible. It changes depending on a few factors, what is unlocked, and the spirit you are in when reading it.

[laconicsax]

10. Huh?

It's a book--you open it to Genesis 1 and read through to the end of Revelation 22. If you can't do it all in one sitting, use a bookmark to keep your place.

[RandomThoughts]

11. heh, thats funny.

http://vimeo.com/1764428



Brothers in Arms - Dire Straits
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5JkHBC5lDs

Bonnie Raitt - I Can't Make You Love Me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nW9Cu6GYqxo

Bonnie Raitt - Nick Of Time
http://www.123video.nl/playvideos.asp?MovieID=407128

Dire Straits - Walk of Life
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CknuCTRAW_I

[The Doctor.]

2. There are a number of variations on this. I like the way this one is presented.

There are a couple of 'anti-porn' dupes I'm going to skewer with this stuff.

Thanks!

[hobbit709]

3. Catfish dinners ain't kosher either.(Fins AND scales)

How many churches have the Friday night fishfry.

Driving or working on the Sabbath.

[TxVietVet]

7. Leviticus is the best for all the goofy rules. So, I was wondering.....

you are allowed to have slaves in Leviticus. I'd like a couple of love slaves. No anti-abortionists or republikans. Just a couple of slaves. Make mine white Canadian girls. Good hefty stock. Knows how to cut grass. :rofl:

[Towlie]

8. Wikipedia: Leviticus is "directed to the priestly class" or to "Hebrew people at large."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leviticus

So if that's correct, it means that a few of the items are questionable when applied to Christians, although it by no means invalidates all eleven of them.

But don't despair, there are many, many, more examples of verses in both the Old and New Testaments that advocate indisputably immoral acts by our modern standards.

Our moral behavior is sadly lacking compared to what it ought to be, but it passed up the Bible many centuries ago; and since the Bible can't change, today it draws its believers backward rather than forward.

[kestrel91316]

9. My favorite wacky rules are: no fiber-blend fabrics, and no intercropping.

[hardcover]

13. That's Old Testament law. Christians are a product of the New Testament.

Christ - New Testament - Christian. I do wish the fundamentalists would understand that.

[hobbit709]

16. Unfortunately everything they get worked up about is from the Old

They completely ignore the words of the New.

[trotsky]

18. Liberal Christians ignore a lot of the New as well.

They don't like a lot of what Paul had to say, and they tend to gloss over the parts where Jesus talks about hell and how to treat one's slaves and all that.

Because the book is hopelessly contradictory and disturbingly brutal and primitive in many areas, every Christian embraces the parts of the bible they like and ignores the parts they don't. Every single one.

[laconicsax]

17. You can't divorce Jesus from the Old Testament.

Jesus is supposed to be the fulfillment of OT prophecies, and is supposed to have died to absolve humanity of their inherited sin, the basis of which is in Genesis. The NT consistently refers to the OT, and relies on it in the Gospels. Hell, Jesus is supposed to have said that all of the OT laws are important and need to be followed. If you take away the existing Old Testament mythos, Jesus is indistinguishable from the other savior gods of the same time period.

[deacon_sephiroth]

19. The word of god

Wherein does it say "Thou shalt pick and choose the word of god you do and don't feel like obeying." Must be new testiment.

[Rageneau]

14. What's odd is that the Bible says nothing about abortion.

Neither pro nor con. When asked where God prohibits abortion in the Bible (if it's such a big sin), the best the fundies can do is cite some completely unrelated statement in the Book of Jeremiah.

[Pacifist Patriot]

20. The Bible is silent on homosexuality as well.

Of course it would have to be since the word wasn't even coined until the late 19th century.

[Thats my opinion]

23. The Bible does include a long statement on abortion.

It describes in detail how to obtain one. Numbers 5:11-29 (a book nobody ever reads and is an ancient cultic document without much of any contemporary significance.)

If a man thinks his wife is pregnant by someone else, he takes her to the priest who goes through a long ceremony culminating in her drinking a concoction that will cause her "uterus to drop and her womb to discharge." That's a chemically produced abortion! The whole thing is primitive mumbo jumbo. Not only is it the ultimate in the diminution of women, it gives all religion a bad name.

[eppur_se_muova]

15. Technically we're not allowed to go to the bathroom!

"...oh just about everything is a sin, have you ever sat down and read this thing? Technically we're not allowed to go to the bathroom!"

... as Rev. Lovejoy explained it

[Angry Dragon]

21. I believe in one part they went out and collected foreskins

not a job I would like...........

[dimbear]

22. Compare conservative Hinduism, where you're not allowed to even have a bathroom.

OTOH, some pretty strange things happen in Bible bathrooms, including an extremely nasty and graphic murder.