A-Z of messageboard commenting for the right wing

[muriel_volestrangler]

ALCOHOL - benign, harmless substance when consumed by anyone over 45 which is also toxic and dangerous drug when administered to YOUNG PEOPLE or FERAL YOUTH. Should be taxed when drunk by YOUNG PEOPLE but not by others, who are of course responsible and never do anything wrong.

AND GUESS WHO'S PAYING?!??!! - usefull catch-all phrase to describe anything in which the government/state is involved. Should be used at the end of any post as punctuation or a final flourish to a well-argued and wittily brilliant excoriation of NULAB's injustices and crimes.

ARRESTED - means someone did it.

BBC, THE - Pinko commie bastard scumbags who love liberals and want our children to be gay. Bonus points for saying "I BET YOU WON'T PUBLISH THIS, COMMUNIST BBC!" whenever you submit anything to the HYS messageboard.

...

http://enemiesofreason.blogspot.com/2008/08/z-of-messageboard-commenting.html

I particularly like: "NATIONAL SERVICE - should be compulsory for everyone younger than me. Never did me any harm! Or the Krays."

[non sociopath skin]

1. Very funny ... and not so far from the truth!

Mind you, posting on right-wing message boards never hurt me, know what I mean? :evilgrin:

Spart ... er, the Skin. :evilgrin:

[muriel_volestrangler]

2. No, I'm Spart.. err, no I can't think where you're refering to

:evilgrin:

[fedsron2us]

3. Now its all kicked off in Georgia

I expect there will be soon need to add some old cold war cliches to the list. Perusing the message boards on this subject I amazed at the number of posters using the term Soviet and USSR when they mean Russia, even though the Communist Party have been out of power for two decades in Moscow and Putin is clearly a right wing nationalist. With such a large number of people with shit for brains it is little wonder we are all dooomed.

[LeftishBrit]

4. These are great!

I especially like:

YOU COULDN'T MAKE IT UP - catch-all Littlejohnian phrase for things which are, as it turns out, frequently actually made up.


Also the blogger's trenchant dissecions of Daily Mail and Daily Express front-pages.

But shouldn't there have been something in that dictionary about DIANA?

[fedsron2us]

5. Littlejohn is not even original

That phrase has been knocking around tabloid land since the time of Noah's Ark.

He is not even any good as a right wing polemicist. Why does not Dacre sack him.

[non sociopath skin]

6. So he didn't make it up?

:evilgrin:

The Skin

[Lydia Leftcoast]

7. This is funny stuff--and one could make up an equivalent list for the U.S.

:7

[Nihil]

8. They'd have to use shorter words though!

:hide:

[non sociopath skin]

9. And some pictures.

The Skin

[Lydia Leftcoast]

10. No argument with either of you!

My examples include things like:

GANG MEMBER: Any black teenager

CRIME AND DRUGS: What conservatives moved to the suburbs to escape from, the exclusive province of GANG MEMBERS, and they're not being racists when they say that, they're just NOT AFRAID TO TELL THE TRUTH

NOT AFRAID TO TELL THE TRUTH: Eager to express opinions about races, ethnic groups, religions, sexual orientations and genders that have been suppressed in the name of POLITICAL CORRECTNESS

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS: Takes all the fun out of life

OVERBURDENED TAXPAYERS: The least-taxed people in the industrialized world

ROADS: The only public service that OVERBURDENED TAXPAYERS consider worthwhile

FREEDOM-LOVING AMERICAN: Anyone who lives in a 6,000 square-foot house on a two-acre lot, has at least three cars in the driveway (one for each member of the family over 16), and most likely a motorboat and an RV

THE DIVERSITY: A snide reference to GANG MEMBERS, as well as their older relatives or younger siblings

PUBLIC TRANSIT: A welfare program foisted upon OVERBURDENED TAXPAYERS and dreamed up by TREE-HUGGERS to force FREEDOM-LOVING AMERICANS out of their cars. Ridden exclusively by THE DIVERSITY who use it to ride to shopping malls in the suburbs and commit crimes and by wealthy TREE-HUGGERS who use it to ride to fancy-shmancy coffee shops where they sip LATTES.

I could go on, but I have work to do today. :-)

[non sociopath skin]

11. You forgot ...

INTELLIGENT DESIGN: Creationism for Dummies.

OUR SOUTHERN HERITAGE: The Ku-Klux-Klan and NASCAR.

SOCIALIZED MEDICINE: A communist-inspired plot to take medical care out of the hands of the drug and insurance companies.

The Skin