Get ready: How the media will spin Kerry and Chimp on the debate

[Sparkly]

Don't be surprised! Here's how the media will cover Kerry's and Chimp's debate performance:

Kerry:
If he's serious, they'll say he's glum, gloomy, pessimistic, and uninspiring.
If he's jovial, they'll say he's phony and trying too hard.

Chimp:
If he's serious, he's, presidential, the war-time commander in chief.
If he's jovial, everybody wants to have a beer with him.

Kerry:
If he's forceful, they'll say he's too aggressive, mean, negative, desperate.
If he's calm, they'll say he's weak, unsteady, dull, lacks energy.

Chimp:
If he's forceful, he's strong, resolute, unwavering.
If he's calm, he's prepared, on-message, disciplined, reserved.

Kerry:
If he's specific, they'll say he's wonkish, presenting "laundry lists," being overly-intellectual, show-offy, and nobody likes the smart kid.
If he's not specific, they'll say he's vague, criticizing but not offering solutions, not addressing the issues, and nobody knows who he is.

Chimp:
If he's specific, he "lays out his plan" and "makes his case."
If he's not specific, he's spanning the issues, giving a global presentation, painting a broad outline of his plans.

Kerry:
If he jokes, they'll say he lacks gravitas, trivializes important issues, doesn't understand troops are in harm's way, nation's at war, disrespects the president, etc.
If he doesn't joke, they'll say he needs to lighten up, he's too stoney, he's wooden.

Chimp:
If he jokes, he's a man of the people, a regular guy, people relate to him.
If he doesn't joke, he truly cares about the American people and his sincerity resonates with voters in this difficult time.

Plus, if he finds his podium and doesn't trip on his way to it, he's surpassed all expectations. (Extra points for correct pronunciation of "Abu Ghraib" or "nuclear.")

[still_one]

1. If Kerry is good, no GREAT, it won't matter what the talking heads say

If Kerry gets the message out, and it is loud and clear, the media will be irrelevent

[Sparkly]

3. True! And he will -- because I have to believe most people DO know

the truth -- about Iraq, about our place in the world now, about our economy, about jobs, about healthcare, etc. etc... No matter how much BushCo snows it all.

[jrice]

44. Hate to rain on it....

Of course people know! They just don't care. Survey Says (pace Richard Dawson): In local elections, they tend to vote issues, for prez they vote the guy they like. "I like Ike" wasn't effective simply because it rhymed.

Come to think of it, do we have a slogan? If we do, the fact that a well-informed Democrat doesn't know it speaks volumes. Did any of those geniuses in the campaign to come up with one?

The Repugs have "Four More Years!" (naturally) What's ours?

[NewJeffCT]

17. the only ways for Kerry to win...

The only ways for Kerry to win the first debate (by far the most important) is for Bush to either commit a major gaffe or for Kerry to come up with a one-liner like "Where's the Beef?"

Otherwise, the media will spin it as a Bush victory.

[rocktivity]

2. "Holy pre-emptive strike, Batman!"

"To the DU Media Blaster, Robin!"


rocknation

[Mr_Spock]

4. All their gonna say is "chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won"

Chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, chimp won, ad infinitum...

[gibbyman]

16. Why

Mr_ Spock can you please tell me what wal-mart did of didn't do for a boycott

[Mr_Spock]

22. Walmart - AKA China mart, AKA trailer mart, AKA poor pay & put

local stores out of business.

I hate the conservative tilt of the chain. This includes the angry bigot low class people who shop in the stores I (used to) go to.

I hate that they have lead the way to charge to the bottom in their exploitation of China and the effect that has had on other businesses (like high-tech even). American pay is on a downward spiral and I believe that Walmart is the LEADER in this charge.

I hate that they pay their workers poorly and treat them poorly.

To me it's the angry conservative bigot undercut America store that represents everything bad happening today - almost like Dubya inc.

[gumby]

5. Are there REALLY going to be debates?

What were all those reports about "squabbles" about?

It's been my contention that there will be NO debates. W will find some ter-a-ist reason to get out of them.

Time will tell.

[Booster]

6. Someone mentioned on another thread that we should email

the entire news media before the debates and thank them for calling the debate for Bush because of his folksiness, his hair, his power tie color, or they would like to have a beer with him. I'm going to email them all and call them out before the debates. Scum.

[oldtime dfl_er]

36. Yes!

If we can find out what talking head-piece-of-crap is going to spin afterwards (ie. will CNN bring in Novak or Candy Crowley to do post-debate "commentary"?) then we as a group can preemptively contact the media and let them know we will be (1) fact checking, and (2) calling them out. Let's get angry!!!

[rocktivity]

8. Last I heard, there were two obstacles to the Sept 30 debates

Hurricane Jeanne, because the debate is to be held in Florida; and the GOP, because the moderators have not signed the 32-page agreement to the ground rules (which I think is EXTREMELY impolite since they're NOT the hosts). The first problem is solved by moving the venue; the second, by letting Kerry buy the TV time and going on alone.


rocknation

[gumby]

10. hurricanes, terr-a-ists, moderators..............

any excuse in a "storm" <cough>

[Borgnine]

7. BRAVO!

A round of applause to you. Let's premptively send this to every media outlet we can and let them know WE'RE ON TO THEIR GAME.

[Seabiscuit]

38. BRAVO II!

Brilliant, Sparkly!

You've got the media pinned to the wall, for certain. Your post clarifies and simplifies their nauseating game.

Journalism in the mainstream media in America has gone straight down the sewer pipes during the past decade or so, so far down by now, it's reached the bottom circle of Dante's Inferno.

Dan Rather has been one of our few remaining journalists with integrity and look at the reaming he's getting from all the other nutjobs in the press and on the boob tube.

Disgusting, I say. Absolutely disgusting.

[JI7]

9. that pretty much says what i have been thinking also

about the way the whores interpret everything.

[GingerSnaps]

11. I say that we start emailing the pundits right now & tell them

What that are going to say and make it sound like they are jokes to us.

[pa28]

12. So right.

As long as he is not obviously intoxicated, can remember at least one coherent sound bite for each response and does not ask for a time-out to fix his ear piece he's set. Kerry could be the ghost of Daniel Webster and the pundits will sit there with a straight face and say he lost.

[DeepModem Mom]

13. You got it, Sparkly! nt

[Skinner]

14. I think you nailed it.

This is exactly right.

[VOX]

31. Skinner-can we get all these points together, and keep this pinned?

It's good enough to be a work in progress, and to send "preemptively" to various media outlets.

Just a thought --

[kaitykaity]

15. This needs a very wide distribution, IMHO.

Let the media whores know ahead of time that we are
SO onto them.

It might even embarrass a tiny percentage of them.

[VOX]

30. I ABSOLUTELY agree! Get this out and around NOW!

Point by point, this is a dead-on, 100% accurate post.

These points should be spread as far and as wide as possible NOW, before the fact.

Even if it doesn't change anything the media will say, the message might inform some listeners beforehand, and they can see that they've been radically spun and lied to.

[BJ]

18. No sh*t, Sherlock. You nailed it, brother.

That's exactly how the "Liberal" media spun Carter-Reagan in '80, Mondale-Reagan in '84, Bush I-Dukakis '88, Gore-Bush II in 2000.

[Sparkly]

24. That's "sister"

and thanks!

[DemExpat]

19. I'm Emailing this list to friends.....

DemEx

[rocktivity]

20. The editor in me couldn't resist moving a couple of the pieces around

THE HANDY DANDY PRE-EMPTIVE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE ANALYZER FOR 2004

CHARISMA:
KERRY: He's phony, condescending and trying too hard
BUSH: He’s a folksy, charming everyman

GRASP OF ISSUES:
KERRY: He’s showing off his intellect, saying what people want to hear
BUSH: He can think on his feet, is smarter than he gets credit for

FORCEFULNESS:
KERRY: He's overly aggressive, mean, negative, desperate
BUSH: He’s tough but fair, strong, resolute, unwavering

CALMNESS:
KERRY: He's weak, unsteady, dull, lacks energy
BUSH: He's confident, well-prepared, on-message, disciplined, reserved

SPECIFICNESS:
KERRY: He's wonkish, just reciting "laundry lists"
BUSH: He’s "laid out his plan" and "made his case"

VAUGENESS:
KERRY: He’s criticizing but not offering solutions, not addressing the issues, and difficult to define
BUSH: He’s spanning the issues, giving a global presentation, painting a broad outline of his plans

JOVIALITY:
Kerry: If he jokes, he lacks gravitas, trivializes important issues, doesn't understand troops are in harm's way, disrespects the president
BUSH: If he jokes, he's a man of the people, a regular guy, easy to relate to

SERIOUSNESS:
KERRY: He’s gloomy, pessimistic, wooden, uninspiring--he needs to lighten up
BUSH: He’s sincere, acting appropriately during these difficult times, resonates with the American people


EXTRA POINTS TO BUSH FOR:
Showing up
Finding the right podium
Not tripping on the way to the podium
Correct pronunciation of "nuclear"
Not mentioning "Abu Ghraib"
Not wearing an earpiece


rocknation

[VOX]

32. Good polish, rocknation!

[Eric J in MN]

21. Thanks, that was great (nt0

nt

[Bread and Circus]

23. You must be on Karl Rove's email list because your post is so perfect

[The Doctor.]

25. Nuclear?

No. Bush* makes a conscious effort NOT to say 'Nuclear'.

His father mispronounced the word many times. Bush* feels that saying 'Nucular' somehow validates Poppy's coinage.

[Downbound]

45. "Nu-que-lar"

I know the pronunciation goes back as far as LBJ, but I wonder if it's not a regionalism -- or maybe only Texans in the Whitehouse are so encumbered....

[A_Possum]

26. We can only hope...

That a large number of people will actually watch the debates. Kerry's physical presence, calmness and simple dignity are incredible. Bush comes into it this time as AS the president, but he doesn't sound or act presidential at all. He stammers and makes little uh-uh's when he jokes.

I was talking online to a beloved but deluded friend of mine who kept claiming he'd seen Kerry's 1971 senate testimony and Kerry was a jerk. I knew he was bs'ing me, because this is a person who actually understands what the guys went through in Vietnam and cares about it.

So, finally, I just started posting big chunks of Kerry's testimony. I didn't say what it was, I just posted it, BAM BAM BAM, one paragraph after another...

by the 4th paragraph, he was silent, except to tell me where the text had been cut off, so I could re-post for him to read the whole thing.

I KNOW it stunned him to see what Kerry had actually said. He was reduced later to saying, well, that was when Kerry was young and understood what Vietnam was, now he's old and bad. (This guy thinks Bush is bad too, he's just down on all of 'em. I'll keep working on him!)

When people actually see the man in action, they get it.

[Eric J in MN]

27. Sparkly - here is one more.

If Kerry repeats himself, the media will feign dismay, asking why Kerry kept repeating himself.

If Kerry doesn't repeat himself, the media will say Kerry failed to stay "on-message."

If Bush repeats himself, the media will praise Bush for staying "on-message."

If Bush doesn't repeat himself, the media will praise Bush for showing he can be spontaneous.

[mcar]

28. You should send that as a LTTE

ahead of the debates. It's great.

[sundancekid]

29. Nominated it for home page ... KUDOS, sparkly ... we could further

extend your eloquent "compare and contrast" into another two-faced campaign, this time the media's!

[Diana52]

33. Get out the vote...

ummm, seems to me this election is ours IF we simply get out the vote. I shall ignore the media, and continue to urge our legion to get to the polls. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!

[moondust]

34. Excellent!

Can't wait to see if any of the talking whore shows offer any simultaneous/preemptive commentary. I imagine the whores are licking their lips at this very moment as they prepare their "spontaneous" reactions.

[PSU84]

35. 100% right.

You should email that post to every media outlet in the country.

[Endangered Specie]

37. Looks like this one made the top 10 conservative idiots!

CONGRATS!!

[sixmoreweeks]

39. Yep

This sounds exactly like something that Chris Matthews and Scarborough and his crew would say. Ughhhh!

[truebrit71]

40. I hope you don't mind...

..I posted this on another board...

...very good, and sadly I think very close to reality...

[VOX]

41. Kick. Keep this outstanding post near the top!

Bookmark it, send it to friends/relatives, send it to the media.

It's that good, and it's that true.

Thanks, Sparkly.

[sisenor]

42. so right!

As sure as clockwork, I just heard Pat Buchanan on MSNBC say Kerry is a "wonkish" debater while Bush is full of "clarity" and "certitude." I mean, why do I bother watching.
The reason why Bush stays on message is cause he memorized the message as he is low on original thought.

[Kikosexy2]

43. Send this all...

TV networks and make them aware that we're on to their spins and we won't put up with it either.

[Supersedeas]

46. Like Bush, the media is superficial and lack depth

They can't help but be attracted to him.