SF Chronicle's Live! Rude! Girl! Appeals to Al Gore to Run

[AtomicKitten]

San Francisco Chronicle - Live! Rude! Girl!
Pretty. Witty. And probably Gay.
Neva Chonin

"I really don’t have that much interest in stardom."

-- Tom Verlaine

Academy Awards, piffle. So boring and disappointing. Such a farce and an embarrassment. Of course, I watch them. What else have I got to do?

* snip *

There's little left to say about the brouhaha surrounding the Academy Awards' decision to go green -- inspired, I guess, by Al Gore's Oscar-winning documentary on global warming, "An Inconvenient Truth" -- except, you know, way to be funny, Hollywood. But even as I mock, I must tip my metaphorical hat to Leonardo DiCaprio and all the celebrities who use their fame to promote good causes. What else is fame good for? It's neither my place nor yours to suggest that an individual's fame makes his or her opinions less informed. They're just as stupid as we are. Let them speak.

Especially when they're feting Al Gore. How much did I enjoy Al's triumph at this year's Oscar ceremony? Whoa, a lot. Oh, Al, of the perfect eyebrows and wooden speech. Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you. Leo DiCaprio was devouring you with his pretty blue eyes, did you notice? Even George Clooney cast you approving glances. Please be our president. We know that you, unlike most Democrats, have a spine. A very stiff spine, true, but nothing that a few months of Pilates couldn't fix. Come back to the five and dime, Al Gore, Al Gore. Save the Democrats from themselves. Save us all from Hillary's grotesque attempts to be likable. Save us from seeing Barack Obama dragged through the mud by the rabid neocons. Most of all, save us from four years of hearing about Rudy Giuliani's sex life. For all we know, he's Anna Nicole Smith's baby daddy, and I, for one, don't wanna listen to the details.

OK, Al. I know, I know. You won't do it, and I understand. The Drudge Report is already nipping at your heels because your mansion uses a lot of energy, which supposedly makes your championing a green world an exercise in hypocrisy. Yeah, right. Who among us doesn't lead a flawed life, from those anti-globalization protesters I caught scarfing Big Macs between marches to the organic-food fanatics who buy produce trucked vast, carbon-belching distances to their local Whole Foods market to people who agitate for free-range cattle without considering that those cattle will probably graze free on the ruins of a rain forest. As for the conservatives, their sundry hypocrisies ... well, don't get me started. The vice president whose lesbian daughter is having a child with her partner even as her father promotes policies that would criminalize her nontraditional little family, or the right-wing evangelist who ... oh, bugger it.

Look, all I want is something I can believe in. This shouldn't be a large request. I want a Democratic candidate who doesn't cower and fumble and who understands that being progressive doesn't preclude talking tough. I'd like to see a Republican candidate who doesn't equate fiscal conservatism with religious fanaticism, one who isn't anti-everything that isn't white, male and in the missionary position.

In other words, I want something I can find only in a fictional universe, splayed across a screen and festooned with Clooney's steamy, smarter-than-thou smirk. I want delusion. Hooray for Hollywood, man.

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/03/04/PKGRJN88UJ1.DTL

[Viva_La_Revolution]

1. excellent!

:)

[ms liberty]

2. Please Al, run!

Everyone I know is unhappy with our current choices and wants you to run - except of course, the 20 percenters who still think Bush is a great guy and want their version of the Bible to be the law of the land.

You could lead us into a future that most of us have given up hoping for and working fruitlessly toward. You could return us to the rule of law, justice for all, and a new Renaissance for America. You could be the Greatest President in the History of the World.

Yes, it means you'd have to sacrifice your newfound success in the private sector, and the happiness you've found in being a private person. You'd have to multi-task and save democracy, the middle class, and the future of our children as well as the planet.

I know it's a lot to ask - but sometimes a statesman has to step up and make the commitment and the sacrifice for the greater good. I'm afraid we're at that point, thanks to the neocons and their agenda of destruction. And it looks like you're the only statesman we've got left who can be trusted to do the right thing.

Run, Al. For America, for our children and grandchildren. For our planet and our future.

[flaliberal]

3. Pretty please . . .

with a cherry on top :shrug:

[mtnsnake]

4. "We know that you, unlike most Democrats, have a spine"

Very good lines.

[IronLionZion]

5. PETA vegans eat crops harvested by huge combines that kill small animals

and family values folks are often adulterers and have had many divorces and abuse their wives while doing meth and having sex with gay prostitutes. Yup don't we all lead less-than-perfect lives.

I use very little electricity (basically just enough for my computer and light) but I guarantee Al Gore has done more for the environment than I have. Nobody likes to be judged and nobody has the right to judge anyone else.

I'll take the wealthy environmentalist over the corrupt criminals any day. I'm confident Gore and Obama are both squeaky clean and married to wonderful women who no one in their right mind would ever cheat on.


Al Gore has my vote....if the wants it.