How many people here personally know someone who is openly gay?

[Locut0s]

Be they friends, family or coworkers.

I asked this question on another forum and was pleasantly surprised by the number of people who responded that they knew several people. I expect the number here to be much higher of course.

In my case my boss at work is openly gay. I work in a convenience store where I am an assistant manager and he is the manager of the store. His partner comes by almost daily to pick him up and they walk home together, they live very close to the store.

There would be so much less intolerance if everyone personally knew someone of an oppressed minority. Sadly many of the rednecks out there grow up in redneck communities knowing of nothing else.

[Oversea Visitor]

1. Me

got a staffer who is gay.

Nothing wrong with that hey they still human being

[maddezmom]

2. my aunt, her partner and my godfather

and lots other folks

edited to add: I also have Friends that have not come out to their family and work associates.

[chalky]

3. Me.

n/t

[sepia_steel]

4. I've known lots of gay people

I don't really have close friends who are anymore since moving away from everyone I know. I have online friends that I haven't met in person who are.

[tulsakatz]

5. I know a few at work.........

........and when I was younger, I knew many more!!

I even used to hang out in gay bars for awhile too!

[ismnotwasm]

6. Lots of people

Including my cousin and her partner who are the proud parents of bouncing baby twin boys.

[Tace]

7. I Know So Many, It's Difficult For Me To Imagine Someone Who Doesn't

I live in Manhattan, so they may have something to do with it.

[freeplessinseattle]

8. many, but I live in Seattle, so am lucky n/t

[mestup]

9. I've known them only through volunteer work.

I'm in the blood-red half of a blue pacific northwest state. I think it must be incredibly difficult to be openly gay here.

[MazeRat7]

10. Many...but I never bothered to count. Well over a dozen or so I guess...

Never thought it was all that important.

MZr7

[shamrock]

11. my brother

He's 13 yrs. younger than me and he had all the signs of being gay since he was little (4 or 5) I remember that he was teased and called "girl" by the other kids because he liked the girls activities (dolls, etc.) rather than things the boys liked. He was openly gay for a few yrs. when he was in his twenties, and then he went "back in the closet". He's been married for quite a few yrs. now and has two sons. I feel bad for him because I know that he was born that way and it must be really hard.

OOPS! Sorry....I didn't post this right and it went in the wrong place.
How can I move this post...or delete it?

[Ms. K]

12. It's just a crime....

When people are so afraid of criticism, or afraid for their well-being, that they hide who they really are.

Hopefully, someday, your brother will feel comfortable enough, and free enough, to be who he really is.

[maddezmom]

13. I combined it for you

[shamrock]

23. Thank you maddezmom

If you're talking to me. It was kind of out of context the way I posted it. I don't post often, I just read...read...and read. Sometimes I feel a little intimidated by how knowledgeable so many of the people here are.

[Dark]

14. Are you sure he isn't bi? nt

[GrpCaptMandrake]

25. I knew this kid growing up

who had all the signs of Cerebral Palsy. That's because he "had" Cerebral Palsy.

Being gay isn't an illness with a diagnosis and a whole raft of symptoms.

From what you describe, it sounds as though your brother is painfully, permanently, pitifully human. Just like the rest of us.

"I built a thousand buildings," the Architect said, "and I sucked one cock. But do they call me "The Builder? Noooooooooo!"

Why must we insist on defining humans by what they do with their genitals? If we caught a primitive culture doing that, we'd be amazed!

Wait a minute.

We ARE a primitive culture.

The dinosaurs were here a couple of hundred million years before the Unicorns convinced them not to get on the Ark with Noah.

Like I said.

[Dark]

15. Do I count?

Of course, only about 1/3 of the people who know me know everything.

Coming out will wait until I'm 21 (less than a year. THAT'S going to be fun. . .)

[funflower]

16. Dozens here in Portland - mostly married couples!

[murielm99]

17. My daughter, her partner and their friends,

my brother, and a Lesbian couple here in town who are close friends. They have been together for forty years. Through them, I know a few other people in the gay community here. I know a gay couple who farm. One of them is divorced, and his kids are often out at the farm. You would be surprised how many rural gay people there are. And most of our community is quite tolerant.

The family who farmed to the south of us had a gay son who was an antiques appraiser. He was very popular. Unfortunately, he died of AIDS about ten years ago. His funeral was well-attended, and he is missed.

There is a pastor in our community who has a a Bible study and ministry
with the gay community, since many churches are backward about openly gay people.

For the first couple of years that we knew our Lesbian friends, who are both involved with the county Democrats, my husband did not realize they were gay. I had to tell him. Then, he said, he did not think of them as gay people, but as a couple of the nicest people he knew.

[Ms. K]

18. Not so much here....

In extremely conservative Riverside County, CA.

I used to KNOW a guy who is gay, when I first moved here....but that's the extent of it out here. He and I weren't friends, but then, it's hard to want to be friends with someone who is abrasive and nasty, not to mention extremely self-destructive (last I heard, because there are so many warrants out for him for DUI, he will never come back here, and he's fled the state). His sexual orientation wasn't the reason I didn't like him, the fact that he was a complete, utter asshole was.

However, back home in good ol' Kentucky, I was friends with two women who are gay, but not partnered with each other. I met their respective partners, and liked them all. Nice people, a true pleasure to be around, and I miss them very much.

Of course, even out here, a FOAF is gay, and she and her partner are close friends with my friend. I've met them, they're nice ladies, as far as I could tell in a fifteen minute chat (we were all at the same place at the same time, and eventually we went our separate ways). I look forward to getting to know them much better, the more we all get together.

Funny though, my husband is EXTREMELY homophobic, but he doesn't seem to have a huge problem with me having gay friends, even friends of the same sex as me. His parents have a big problem with it, being the reactionary Christofacists that they are, but I don't give a fuck, because they don't like me anyway.

[Behind the Aegis]

32. Very interesting reply

I like what you had to say. I too know many a gay "asshole." I dislike them because of the asshole factor. Since I am gay, I am not generally called a "homophobe." However, I have met many a gay person who was homophobic. So, I say, good on you! You admit that you know a gay asshole! Sometimes, I feel that gays are treated with "kid gloves." It is as you say, that we are just people, some good, some not so good!

[Locut0s]

36. Well a life time spent dealing with the reality that you belong to..

a group of people who are oppressed and hated by many can bread two things. In some it breads strength and character. In others it breads anger and resentment.

[Behind the Aegis]

38. True...and sometimes...

..a little of it all! I can honestly say that sometimes I am very angry and resentful, especially when I have family voting Rethug. When I hear they have done it, I always ask..."so will you be the one to place the pink triangle on me, when they come for me?" That usually burns them up, especially because we are Jews too!

Anger can breed strength if harvested correctly.

[Larissa238]

146. There are gays who are heterophobic

and bi-phobic, too.

[Behind the Aegis]

147. yes...and...

trans-phobic. Bigotry is no stranger to our community either, by any stretch of the imagination!

[Larissa238]

151. And its such a sad thing

When what we really need to do is unite, and not be like everyone else and scared of people who are different than us.

[foreigncorrespondent]

54. Small correction.

This isn't an attack either. Just wanted to let you know, that homosexuality isn't actually a sexual orientation. If you say that, then you are actually defining someones life by who they sleep with, rather than who they are.

[Ms. K]

183. *blush*

Oops, I'm a little embarrassed now...I apologize!

I didn't mean to do that...honestly. I don't define him by who he sleeps with....I identify him mostly as an asshole because that's what he is.

And the reason I say that is this; aside from his multiple DUI convictions, drug habit, and stealing from his brother's business and trying to blame it on other employees, he at one point was married to a woman I used to know (we've lost touch, but for other reasons), and they had three kids.

He's ditched his kids. He plainly said, the last time I ever talked to him, that he was ditching the kids because he didn't want them anyway, and he didn't feel like paying child support because he then he couldn't afford to party. Even though he had no problem making those kids, and getting rid of his ex-wife's birth control to get her pregnant, he didn't want the kids.

Yeah...he's a real peach. A true winner.

[OnionPatch]

140. Welcome to DU, Ms K

I'm from Riverside County, CA, too so at least you're not the ONLY liberal!

[Ms. K]

180. Wooohoooo!

Nice to know there's more than just me!

I'm in the Lake Elsinore area. Where are you?

[Maat]

181. Welcome, Ms. K!

Join our local PFLAG (Parents, Family, Friends of Lesbians and Gays) here in Temecula, Ca.; we educate, advocate and provide support for families (For DUers, Temecula is in extremely conservative Riverside County). I'm a 47-year-old straight, long-married ma, and our group is a great diverse mix of friends.


I joined because I wanted to support my good friends (a lesbian couple).


We have a huge group of progressives here in Temecula/Murrieta; you just need someone to connect you to the right websites.

PM me if you want the links (use the personal message option; I hit options, then profiles, then type the name - e.g. 'Maat' - then I hit send private message). I meet with the local Democracy for America group, PFLAG, Together in Our Valley, and we're working on a local Congressional campaign.

[cynatnite]

19. My niece...

She recently moved in with her partner and they're raising her two daughters together.

I have a few gay friends I see on occasion, my daughter has one at school and sadly I've lost a few over the years. One was a good friend from high school that died of AIDS several years ago.

The most gay friends I had at one time was, oddly enough, in the Army. Several of the people I worked with were gay.

[Dunvegan]

20. I live in San Francisco...

...and I have a few dear friends and know a lot of people.

It's the "person" part I focus on...everything else is just the delicious gravy of diversity.

[Locut0s]

21. The replies here are just further proof that...

by and large those who grow up in larger urban neighbourhoods tend to live in more diverse open communities and end up having many gay or minority friends. Other who have grown up in similar environments have questioned here what the big deal is. I live in Vancouver Canada and the store I talked about in my original post is in a particularly gay friendly part of the city. Sadly though for those who grow up in small towns and in the country side this is actually a big deal.

[and-justice-for-all]

22. That would be me....

I know several...

[shockingelk]

24. Two good gay friends.

[sofa king]

26. One of my very best friends.

And a remarkable fellow is he. Equally remarkable is the effect he had on another friend of ours who was once a notable homophobe.

Some time ago now, the homophobe learned that the gay guy was gay (he was really slow on the uptake and didn't figure it out until one night when we were all getting soused at a bar). It was quite awkward and embarassing for the homophobe.

It took awhile... a long while... but sure enough, when confronted with the abstract idea that homosexuality is wrong, and the very real presence of this great guy who is one of his good friends, the homophobe did something I've not often seen.

He sat down, thought about it, and decided that the friend was much more important than the stupid idea--and made sure to tell all of us that was his decision. Last year he joined us at the High Heel Race in Dupont Circle (sorry I missed it this year).

It took two exceptional people to make that understanding happen. The gay guy had to remain the great person he is, but it also required the homophobe to question his entire worldview, and have the courage to change his mind. I'm blessed to have two such excellent friends, and I am honored to have seen such a remarkable thing happen.

[Uncle Roy]

171. Nice story!. Thanks for that. (nfm)

.

[lies and propaganda]

27. my best friend and i had weird teenage sex..

he came out to me about a year later. Its been ten years and i love him, just in healthy awesome ways.

[Thom Little]

28. I'm here to testify that there are openly gay people even in Alabama.

More power to 'em!

[Locut0s]

30. Here Here! Must be hard there though!

[William769]

121. Most everyone I know is Gay.

I know a few Heterosexuals as well.

[Moloch]

69. Congratulations!

I want to thank you for being a liberal in Alabama!

I got my ass kicked in school all the time because I was gay. I will never go back to that hellhole state as long as I live.

I'm glad that there are at least a few liberals there though.

[soothsayer]

29. I'm a don't-ask-don't tell lesbian, but I know openly gay folks

my girlfriend was out to her mom (now deceased) but is closeted to her sister.

[SeattleGirl]

31. Friends, co-workers, former classmates

Someone being gay has never bothered me, probably because my mom had several close friends who were gay, and it was just something I was around. They were "just folks" to me. Never understood the nasty, negative reaction some people have to those who are gay.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

33. Between academia, classical music, and the Episcopal Church, I know

more GLBT people than I can count.

[JDPriestly]

34. I know so many that I could not count them. Many, many.

I'm not gay, but I have lots of gay and lesbian friends.

[az chela]

35. I do

my brother-in-law and my nephew are both gay and I love them both dearly.
I was the first person my nephew told and he was 24 at the time and engaged to a girl to keep his mom and dad happy and I told him to be proud of who he is and to live his life for his happiness and when he finally told people guess what??No one dropped dead from shock and he and his partner have been together for over 8 yrs

[Skittles]

37. LOTS

they know better than to be in the closet around me, LOL - I bring out the real person, always. YES INDEED!!! In fact, on Nov 3, going to see CAPOTE with my gay friend Rick. CAN'T WAIT!!!!!

[Douglas Carpenter]

39. Is there ANYONE who does not know at least some gay people?

Maybe I have lived a sheltered life, but I cannot imagine ANYONE not knowing at least some openly (or at least semi-openly) gay people. That is inconceivable to me these days. Although 25 years ago almost every gay person outside of major urban centers lived a more or less secretive life.

[OneBlueSky]

40. might be easier to count those who don't know anyone gay . . . n/t

.

[Nabia2004]

41. My childhood best friend is still in the closet.

...but his brother is out. Four boys in the family, two gay and one gay uncle. The uncle was an early victim of aids.

[Der Blaue Engel]

42. I know very few people who aren't

But then I live in San Francisco and I'm bisexual.

To give a little less biased perspective, when I was in high school and college in Tucson (and not identifying openly as bi) I still knew a good dozen.

[sproutster]

43. Interesting question

In Alaska I knew numerous open gay people. ...one of my best friends is gay. Heck I helped costume for a drag contest. I also vaguely recall yelling about "hetro hate" when I was kicked out of a gay club for being a tad toasted. (it was funny... and nobody was being mean - me nor them)

In Idaho ZERO zilch and nada. Interestingly enough, coming from Alaska (Even tho the Senator needs to walk what he's talking - the bastard) I was flipping SHOCKED at the overt racsism and homophobia here. I guess I must have lived in a bubble or something. In Alaska, where men are men and women win the Iditorod ... It just wasn't done. I really miss the tolerance. I don't know if the other Alaskans see it the same way, I'll be curious to see their responses.

[xultar]

44. MY BEST DEAREST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD!!!

And a whole bunch others both gays and lesbians!

[Behind the Aegis]

47. This will sound odd...but...

...I have seen many of your posts...I love them. Are you an African-American woman? I am just curious, but if you don't want to share, I am fine with that. However, I have noticed that many gay men and Black women are good friends. Many of my friends are Black women. I have my own personal theories, so if you are an AA woman, I was wondering if you had similar experiences. (I am a white gay guy.)

[xultar]

50. Yes I am a Sistah....you are right I can meet a gay man on the street

and be instant friends. Most of my gay friends I've known for 10 yrs or more. I don't like people messin with them either. I'll fight a gay-basher in a hot second. They know a sistah will tear'em to pieces too!

I hung out in Boys Town in Chicago and lived in NOLA too. I loved the gay community in NOLA. Decadence was way better than mardi gras.
It is funny but it's nothin but a thing. It's natural.

Don't be fooled. There are those crazy Christian blacks just like crazy Christian whites who will act ignorant and show their asses and think Jesus was into hate. I swear I don't get that whole 2 faced thing.

I love to share. That is what DU is all about. Nice to meet you Aegis!

[Behind the Aegis]

57. I KNEW IT!!!

I knew that I would like you!!!!

I am the same way about my sistahs and their sorahs (sorority sisters...I have never seen the word spelled).

I have been to Chicago and NOLA....my partner and I wanted to move there..still do! I live in Okla-Hell-ma and I felt bad when I flew home on the east coast and landed in TN and saw all those "black" faces and felt like I was home! It was a relief. I grew up in the South, so African-Americans are apart of my experience. I was fortunate that I grew up in a house that valued all people. My father was an EEO officer for the military, so racist jokes were a big "no-no," not that it was common.

I have been fortunate that I have had so many different types of people in my life. I was just talking to one of my best friends (a Black woman) and she will get so excited about something and say..." Girrrl...er, I mean...sister...er..damn..you! You know what I mean." LOL! It doesn't bother me that she says says "girl and sister," because I know it means she thinks of me as a close friend. Besides, I know I am a man, but I am not offended to be called female. It may not be accurate, but it is not offensive.

Here is my 'theory' on Black women and gay men: I believe what draws us to one another is misogyny. Although gay men can (and some are) be misogynists, most of us are "demeaned" by being compared to women, as if being female is a bad thing; whereas, African-American women are women. The status of women in the US culture is not very high, and sometimes, in the AA community, it is even worse. So, I feel that gay men and AA women find this bond that makes us stronger. We both find pride in who we are and will not tolerate disrespect for it and, therefore, are called "bitches" and other names. I also think there is a respect, at least from me, at the plight of the African-American woman in our society that further cements the relationship. I hear calls for more "Malcolm X'es and MLK, Jrs.," but no calls for more "Rosa Parks and Harriet Tubmans." Of course, most of that is because of the disrespect shown to all women. My mom says, "There is no gay or straight; no black or white, no this or that; only man and woman."

I hope I have not offended you, and if I have I know you will correct me! But, why do you think we (gay men (in particular) and African-American women) get along the way we do?

[xultar]

100. Naw honey. You haven't offended me. I you know I love ya.

PM me. Let's exchange email addys and AIM, MSN MEssenger, and or Yahoo IM addresses. I live outside of ATL.

I gotta run to Starbucks or I SWEAR I'M gonna die!! I'll BRB.

[hlthe2b]

45. I was amazed by the question....Anyone who lives in an urban area

surely must know many. My area of Denver is a popular residential location for all kinds of people, heterosexual singles, marrieds with kids, gays, you name it. Probably 1/3 of my current condo complex are owned by gay men. Heck, there are plenty of out gay men (and lesbian women, I assume) in Cheyenne, Wyoming, not exactly a bastion of liberalness. Although "out" is perhaps a bit less overt there, I suppose.

[Behind the Aegis]

46. Lots!

I am gay and out. I have cousins on my step-dad's side that are gay, but have never met them. All my ex-boyfriends have been gay, but one...he was bi. My current partner of 4 years is gay, but not out to his family, except that one really smart aunt, who is French, "figured" it out.

All three of my brothers know, as do my parents, and a host of other relatives. They just don't care. There was tension at first, but it has died down, especially after they met my partner and realized I had him completely snowed and he thinks I hung the moon! So, they LOVE him!

But, many of them did change their attitudes after they knew about me. It wasn't so "abstract" after they "found" out. A few, lifelong Rethugs, voted against any candidate that was anti-gay! Not a complete conversion, but a step in the right direction.

I am very lucky though. I have a few friends that have been disowned. One friend can even visit his 'grave marker." His parents 'buried' him the day he came out...memorial service and all.

I have had many co-workers "come around," after they realized I was not any different than them. I had the same problems, concerns, fears, hopes, loves, and humanity as they had. They found it hard to hate gays, when they loved one.

[Rob H.]

130. "One friend can even visit his 'grave marker."

His parents 'buried' him the day he came out...memorial service and all.

My older brother (and only sibling) was killed in an automobile accident 16 years ago and I think of him every day. My mother still has a hard time talking about him without tearing up. To hear that your friend's parents are "giving him up for dead," so to speak, well, I find that deeply, profoundly sad. What kind of parents would do that to their child? Hang on...I don't want to know.

Back on topic, I have one very close gay friend whom I've known for almost 20 years and a couple of gay acquaintances. All of them are very fine people.

[mirandaod]

48. 3 very close friends

and several more who I see occasionally.

[ClintonTyree]

49. I know a few........

One Uncle on my Mother's side of the family, one Uncle on my Father's side of the family and several co-workers who are Lesbians. I've also known (not in the biblical sense) many gay men throughout my lifetime. They're all fine people, with my gay Uncle on my Father's side being my favorite relative out of everyone. He's positively the nicest, funniest person I've ever met.
I live near Rochester, NY which has a huge G/B/L community for a City it's size. It's a very tolerant area and no one bats an eye about it around here.

[donheld]

51. I know myself as well as anyone can

I also know hundreds of others.

[Sapphocrat]

52. A few, I guess...

Well, there's me, for one, and my girlfriend, and every boy I've ever hung out with since high school, and all my ex's, and everybody I've ever danced with in clubs from San Francisco to NYC, and...

Should I count everyone I've ever met at pride parades and in gay student unions? In which case, the number is now in quintuple digits (er, maybe sex-tuple)...

Sign me,
Flaming Homo in a Playful Mood Tonight

[RebelOne]

53. I had many friends and co-workers and even a boss

who were gay. But, of course, at that time, I lived in Miami, where gays are not condemned as they are in other parts of the country.

[BIG Sean]

55. My Brother is Gay and Out to everyone..

He is a good man, and through him I have come to know many gay people.

Now the fun part is explaining all of this to my kids. LOL

[ikojo]

56. My late uncle was as was my late brother

I have a couple of friends who are lesbians.

[Mutley]

58. I have several friends who are openly gay...

male and female, and my former boss is openly gay.

[entanglement]

59. I don't know a single one, and I'm the very antithesis of a redneck

n/t

[sandnsea]

62. Never have, seriously?

I don't get that. Are you sure you aren't just missing the obvious?

[entanglement]

70. That must be it, I must have the worst 'gaydar' there is

Plus, I lead a fairly solitary life and don't know / meet too many people in the first place

[Bouncy Ball]

93. Oh I bet you do know a few.

You just don't know they're gay.

Even when I was attending a VERY conservative university, I bet I knew at least a few gay people.

[Dulcinea]

60. Sure.

My next-door neighbor, who watches our house when we're on vacation.

Several co-workers. Some are partnered, some are not.

All of them are nice people. I don't consider their private lives to be any of my business. Of course, I live just outside of Atlanta, & we have one of the biggest gay populations in the country.

[sandnsea]

61. Always have, even in rural America

Every place I've ever lived I've known gay people, from the smallest town to larger cities. I don't get how anybody can not. I grew up next to a gay man in the 60's, although I didn't understand it at the time. He was the talk of the neighborhood and I remember the women being particularly impressed with how white his sheets were. They couldn't figure it out. (uh, he hung them on the line, duh, which is why they saw them in the first place. gabby suburbanites)

[Hekate]

63. Of course, but then I live in coastal Calif where a lot of folks are out

Co-workers and other colleagues of my husband and myself. Friends of my now-adult children: friends they grew up with since grade-school, who felt okay with coming out in their adolescence. My kids were okay with it too, I'm glad to say -- we raised them to be, and our church (Unitarian) included LGBT info in the comprehensive sexuality course for the adolescents.

My sister is bi-, but when she chose to marry a man she then chose to be faithful to him. She still thinks of herself as bi-, but she's married.

There was a LOT of intolerance in my high school in the 1960s. I didn't participate in harassment, I wasn't the object of harassment (at least not for that), but it affected me and it took me years to get my mind clear on the issue.

Here's the key to today's wider acceptance, I think: The more people who come out, the more society recognizes the LGBT populace as being their sons, daughters, co-workers, neighbors.

Not so much in small towns, though, because there's so much uniformity there that really different people end up moving away to the cities. Not just gays, but artists and others who are or feel substantially different from the majority. It's too difficult being the only one.

Hekate

[Rockholm]

64. I know Hundreds of gay people.

Starting with me, my old neighborhood was overwhelmingly gay. We're EVERYWHERE!

[Moloch]

65. I'm openly gay...

and have been since I was 15.

Why is this a big deal?

[Nay]

66. Me. Five. All friends/coworkers.

[w8liftinglady]

67. My best "work" friend

Has the best sense of humor,and is as radical as I am,politically(in a very conservative hospital)

[cmd]

68. Many

No need to list them all, but they come from all walks of life and in every color and shape.

[Breeze54]

71. I personally know at least 20 or more...

... jury's still out on a few others!
I probably know more than that.
Why?

[seabeyond]

72. two brother in laws, one of my best friends and

a handful of other people

[Bridget Burke]

73. Of course. But I used to know a lot more.

They died in the 80's.

[OKthatsIT]

74. geeeez...I'm in Mass. I dont know anyone in the closet.

Then again...how would I know?

[baldguy]

75. My sister, her parner, several co-workers, several high-school classmates.

[Az]

76. I know several

A couple are coming to my Halloween party this weekend. I'm a UU and we tend to encourage people to be more open about such things. As a result I know lots of homosexuals, pagans, atheists, and all manner of other types that the conservatives wish would just go away.

[kwassa]

77. I know a brazilian gay people.

Lounge joke.

But, I do know a lot.

[Zing Zing Zingbah]

78. I know five people...

two are family members and two are their partners, and the other one is a friend.

[flvegan]

79. I know several folks pretty well, plus as an activist in my idiot county

I've met a hundred or so others. Well, I've met several hundred, but actually talked to a hundred or so...

[indigo32]

80. I am out at work and with my nuclear family and friends

the woman I am dating has a very difficult time with being out.

[BiggJawn]

81. Used to. Worked for them, lived with them.

My boss was "open", and my neighbours up in Herron-Morton were sure out and proud. "Are you Family???" "Uh, no, I'm distant cousin..."

Then I moved out of the city, and there's no gay pride parades up here....

[Neil Lisst]

82. I know many openly gay people.

Including some close family members.

Many gays gravitate from rural areas to cities to gain a measure of safety and acceptance.

[Ex Lion Tamer]

83. Many

Two of my closest friends are gay.

[LibertyLover]

84. I know several -

family, friends and collegues at work. I have a cousin who is a lesbian and in a committed relationship for over 20 years now. I've got two pairs of friends, again lesbian couples, that I've known for over 15 years. In a medieval recreation group my husband and I belong to, there are two openly gay members of our household. And finally, I work with a guy who is openly gay, living with his partner and who adopted a little girl from Vietnam about a year before my husband and I adopted our daughter from China. Living in a major metropolitan area as my husband and I do, it would be very odd indeed if we didn't know, and know pretty well, at least one person who was openly gay.

[justiceischeap]

85. Me and almost all of my friends (eom)

[Stinky The Clown]

86. Too many to count. So many that it doesn't even matter

My wife and I are both in fields that have traditionally been bastions of open gays. For both of us, it isn't even an issue. Indsed, for us, personally, it was never an issue, but in this day and time, the gays we know have always been aeccepted - at least in the parts of their lives that intersect ours.

[Hobo]

87. Me.

My nephew.


Hobo

[readmoreoften]

88. You should make this a poll. It'd be an interesting one.

My girlfriend is openly gay. Oh yeah, me too.

[Silverhair]

89. Several, including a family member. NT

[Terran]

90. Aside from myself

lots. I also know a few who aren't out of the closet, which I think is unfortunate for them.

[ComerPerro]

91. Me. I know many.

[Bouncy Ball]

92. Geez, where would I start?

With my bi uncle or my lesbian cousin? Or all the wonderful friends I have who happen to be gay/lesbian/bi?

My church friends who are gay?

My coworkers who are gay?

I've never really sat down and counted all the gay people I know, LOL.

I also, fortunately, know a LOT of straight people who fight for and/or are sympathetic to gay rights. That's always nice, too. I can't handle homophobia. It's so ignorant and irrational.

[Saphire]

94. my sister

[bee]

95. yep. many people. :) n/t

[MN ChimpH8R]

96. Me

couple of old childhood friends. Sadly, one is no longer with us.

[mcar]

97. One of my oldest and dearest friends

A neighbor, my former boss, my old physical therapist.

This is in a small rural community too.

[priller]

98. I know several

3 that I see all the time, 1 lesbian is one of my best friends.

[schmuls]

99. Many, both deceased and living

[Solon]

101. One of my friends growning up had two moms...

That's one example. I worked with many lesbians and gay men in my life, at various jobs, and my best friend of the past 6 years is a lesbian.

[MissMarple]

102. Someone, maybe Olbermann or Anderson, interviewed gay cowboys.

It was last night, I think they were in Texas. They have a rodeo and everything. It really showed ...just the humanity.

And, yes, I know several people who are openly gay, several live in my neighborhood, others have taught my children. It doesn't seem to be an issue here. This is Colorado Springs and we have a large gay community. It must drive the fundies up north crazy.

[ohio_liberal]

103. I only know one person my age who is openly gay

I went to high school with her and she was very troubled back then. Looks like she's very happy now.

There are kids my son goes to high school with who are openly gay. Teenagers in general in this area are very open about their sexuality. I live in a very conservative (and Dem-voting) area of Ohio so it's good see that things might be changing. The kids are open and accepting but the parents are generally bigots.

[Terry in Austin]

104. My niece and her partner

...and they just had a baby.

I also have several friends and acquaintances who are openly gay.

[LostinVA]

105. Me

[Arugula Latte]

106. Oh, lots.

My husband and I are friends with some gay couples and do social things with them and I like that our kids (5,8) will never have the "Us/Them" mentality about gay people. They think it's completely ordinary, which it is, of course.

[BeachBuckeye]

107. I count several gays as friends

I don't think a bit differently of them than my "straight" friends. No big deal.

[lavenderdiva]

108. 8 very close friends throughout my life...

grew up in New Orleans, and lived there over 30 years, so I actually think its odd I didn't have MORE gay friends than I do! My friends who are gay are some of my closest friends, and have been so for many, many, many years. I love them dearly, and am so glad that the man I married, also now counts them as dear friends.

I no longer live in New Orleans (unfortunately), but still consider it home, and my friends come and visit us all the time...

[Hell Hath No Fury]

109. I live in San Francisco...

Next question?

[Lisa]

157. When I was visiting my boyfriend in Oakland ...

... there was a gay couple living in the house next door, and a lesbian couple in the house across the street. Guess which couple had the motorbikes, rock-climbing equipment, and Golden Retriever ... and which couple had the beautiful European porcelain collection! I was actually disappointed that nobody was out busting stereotypes!

[Bullwinkle925]

110. I do. Both in the family and friends' circle.

[noonwitch]

111. Mostly coworkers and friends from church

I probably have at least one relative who is-one of my cousins, I'm pretty sure is gay, but it's not like I really care if she is or not.

[MsTryska]

112. I know dozens of gay people....

always have.


it would be strange to me for soemone to not know anyone gay.

[Pacifist Patriot]

113. Friends, family and co-workers.

[insane_cratic_gal]

114. I have several friends

who are openly gay.

What shocks me are those who do not.

[slackmaster]

115. I work, speak, and socialize with them every day

Several of my closest friends are openly gay.

[More Than A Feeling]

116. The secretary of student government here is openly bi

he just wrote a letter in our student newspaper praising the college for its tolerance of GLBT people. He has also been speaking to student groups about his coming out experience.

[freethought]

117. I have known a gay couple for nearly 30 years

Two gay men that have been living together for longer than I have known them. Their relationship has been more stable than some hetero couples I have known. Not without some ups and downs, one of them began to drink heavily and his partner was quick to get him treatment. Contact has kind of dropped off because my family moved to another state. Guess that's just the way it goes.

[thereismore]

118. 5

[MUAD_DIB]

119. Five G. Two L.

[One_of_8]

120. I know and have known quite a few

Sadly, I've lost a brother and three good family friends to AIDS. My brother wasn't openly gay though.

However, I'm friends with a lesbian couple, plus am aquainted with their large circle of friends, which have a mix of gay, straight and bi.

I've worked with people who were openly gay.

My hairdresser and his business partner are a gay couple.

[Hard_Work]

122. several friends

and at least two co-workers are gay. I couldn't care less about who is sticking what into who, (or being stuck). I care about whether or not you are a good person.

[belle]

123. Myself. best friend. dozens of others.

now someone go conduct this poll on FR.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

124. most people i know are gay/bi

[newspeak]

125. two family members and some acquaintances

I do not see a problem--the people I know and have met are some of the most witty, intelligent,talented people. My former boss(woman) once told me that she wanted to hire a "gay" man to replace me because she felt that she could find some who were talented, witty and "retentively responsible." I guess someone like me--of course, I don't know about the witty part.

[area51]

126. 3 former co-workers were gay. (n/t)

[EFerrari]

127. San Francisco here. We're all honorarily gay.

I remember when the city's gay community was smaller. It's a much better place to live now.

[catmother]

128. i have several gay friends

and have had many over the last 40 years. unfortunately many of the people i knew died of AIDS.

[Broken_Hero]

129. I know quite a few...

My wifes mentor/friend at work, as a matter of fact, she has about 5 or 6 gay friends from work, and we get along just fine. When i was in college i was friends with 6 openly gay men/women, and when i first started working for the grocery store about 8 yrs ago, i was hitting on a woman who turned out to be a lesbian, it took me a while to figure that out, but we continued to be great friends...i have had a lot of gay friends....

[mtnester]

131. My son: out to most...,my uncle, out to no one and in denial

My son does not want to be out to everyone...i.e. he specifically stated he does not want his GGrandparents to know (they are very ill and not for this earth much longer)...he said there is not reason to upset them at this time in their life. If he ever changes his mind about that, he said he will tell them himself, however, he doubts that will happen.

[maxsolomon]

132. this is a liberal forum

its going to be around 99%. i cannot count how many i know at this point, from my art & social studies teachers in elementary school to high school friends to college & graduate school class mates to co-workers at every job i've had. truly, no one gives much of a fuck about it anymore.

i bet over 50% of bush voters know someone gay. that person may have left town to preserve their life, but they still know them.

[abluelady]

133. Of course.

[ncgrits]

134. Know lots of gays and lesbians. . . .

in fact my sons and I had lunch with one of our best family friends today, who happens to be a lesbian. No big deal.

We live in NC . . . in the Triangle.

[drmom]

135. Since I'm a lesbian, I'll only count people who are not friends...

...since I would naturally have more friends of similar interests, etc. So, of people I would have know even if I weren't gay - the principal of my kids school is a lesbian, as is one of the doctors in our pediatric practice, and the OB who delivered my first baby. Since my kids do theater, about 80% of the men in the theater world are gay, including the author and director of their current production (and I've never met a male choreographer who is not gay!)...also two of my first cousins, and one of my partner's first cousins...

[GCP]

136. My hairdresser who married his lover last year (they're both in their 50s

Gino's a grandpa and Allan's a father. Two lovely guys. I've also worked with several gay guys as a nurse.

[OnionPatch]

137. Well, first

I have a cousin who is transexual. He lives across the country so I don't know him too well but from what I hear, he's an awesome person. Very active in the peace movement.

I worked for awhile in an office where they called me the "token heterosexual." I sat next to and worked very closely with a lesbian and a gay guy. I loved both of them and miss the great (and informative) conversations we used to have. The relationships cemented my belief that they deserve the same rights as the rest of us.

[HughBeaumont]

138. Directly related to one, three others by marriages . .. .

All of them lesbians (sister in law, her partner, my Uncle's wife's kid, cousin).

I know a few more who are gay men and one who's really closeted but I know she is.

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

139. I'd say pretty much everyone knows SOMONE who's gay. The question is

a lot different when looked at from the standpoint of , "do you know anyone OPENLY gay."

It's like the whole idea of banning gays in the military. There's still gays in the military all right, about as many as there have ever been. They just might not tell you that they are, is all.

[anitar1]

141. I'm kinda old and doubt if I could count them. I have known/

know many. Some very close friends, others from work ect. People are people. Have to say, some of my most rewarding friendships have been with gay men.

[Name removed]

142. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[ulysses]

143. yup.

Many friends.

[VOX]

144. My brother, his partner, their friends, my co-workers, my wife's friend...

And that's just off the top of my head. I'm in So. Cal., so it's just an average day here!

[Larissa238]

145. I am gay.

And I know many others.

[Greyskye]

148. Approximately 10% of my co-workers

I work in a large department of a major high tech firm which is constantly being recognized for it's focus on diversity in the workplace. They don't go 'looking' for gay job applicants, they just hire them if if they are the best applicant for the position.

We will be losing one of our best web programmers within the next year when she moves to Canada to be with her wife. If gay marriage was legal in California, she would be staying here and having her wife join her.

[Kukesa]

149. My cousin (a physician) and her partner (small business owner).

Everyone else in the family is in denial, but I embrace them and their decision. My cousin "outed" herself to me several years ago; I love her very much.

[ContraBass Black]

150. It might take me a while to count them.

Edit: Eleven off the top of my head, but I know I'm missing somebody.

[fishwax]

152. Several

i've got a big gay circle of friends to 'em

[Katidid]

153. I known a whole community

and my best boy friend is gay...

[knitter4democracy]

154. First boyfriend in college.

He was seriously in the closet and was horrible to me. I heard that, after graduation, he went nuts down in Texas and came out in a big way. Honestly, it wasn't that suprising.

I had several friends in college who are gay or lesbian. One was forced to come out to all of us by the (evangelical) college "for her protection" or whatever. I hurt so badly for her. Our college was absolutely awful to anyone who was different and especially so to the gays and lesbians (didn't know of any bisexual students and transgendered would never have been allowed at all). They went through horrific crap.

[Sgent]

155. Here...

my sister is openly gay. I am also friends with some of her friends, and had a former boss who I was close to who is gay (male). My brother's former roomate was nominally bisexual, but has been in a monogomous homosexual relationship for the last 5 years.

[Lisa]

156. one close friend in high school, and a half-dozen co-workers ...

... in two different cities. And the VP of our local progressive political party (I was on the executive committee with her, the past couple of years). She and her partner have an adopted child who's already in elementary school (how time flies!). And the son of our party president came out in high school, and was our web guy before he left for college.

There are probably others, but it's rapidly becoming so normal that people don't even mention it, so I don't know until the topic is broached.

I suppose that eventually I will be invited to a same-sex wedding, since both the provinces where I spend the most time have declared it legal.

[0rganism]

158. I've known many gay people

True to the population averages, it seems like about one in twenty of the people I meet are openly gay.

[erinlough]

159. I have many gay friends

I go to a gay hairdresser who gave me a puppy that I dearly love, and calls me his second mom. I volunteer with a group all summer where many of the members are gay. Actually, for a 50 something woman, I think I have more than the average number of gay men friends. The weird thing is that I don't know more than two or three gay women, and I don't have any problem with lesbian lifestyles either.

[LaurenG]

160. I know several and had a house mate who is as well

In my opinion it isn't relevant. I feel color, sexual orientation and spiritual persuasion don't count. If your an a** that counts. (I don't care for them).

[maveric]

161. There is the hot looking Lady at work I was trying to get close to.

Then she introduced me to her wife.
Working in the Healthcare industry there are many openly gay people around.

[No Exit]

162. I know several, and they are not financially oppressed.

And those who are openly gay are far less oppressed on other levels, than are those who are trembling in the closet.

[ThatsMyBarack]

163. In no particular order....

1. A lot of adults I skate with.

2. One of my sister's college friends and his partner.

That's all I can think of right now, but I'm sure there are more.

[serryjw]

164. Plenty...I couldn't count

Actually I know no one that is in the 'closet'.My dear friends got 'married' in VT and SF

[Dastard Stepchild]

165. Openly bi myself...

And know many gay, lesbian and bi individuals.

[Aimah]

166. Knowing Gays

I know too many to name. All have been co-workers. At the moment there aren't any gay people as far as I know in my family. I live in Indianapolis which is for the most part the Liberal Island in the sea of Rednecks in Indiana so a lot of them have moved from smaller towns to seek the Gay community in Indy.

[PowerToThePeople]

167. Me. Two of my girlfriends will be getting married soon. n/t

[Lorien]

168. Two family members, several friends and LOTS of former coworkers

(I worked in the entertainment industry).

[Momgonepostal]

169. A brother, a family friend who is not so open...

but gay, nonetheless, and other assorted people.

Is there anyone here who DOESN'T know any gay people? That would surprise me more.

[MrSlayer]

170. I have a few "out" friends.

And I agree that people are afraid of that which they are not familiar. Once you get around those that are "different" for a little while and recognize them as people instead of "things" it's quite easy to get over.

[Raine]

172. My grandmother was

though I didn't know it till years later. Two male friends that are a couple and the guys who used to live next door.

[Name removed]

173. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

174. A former professor of mine.

A gay Jewish man living in small-town Texas, believe it or not. A really great guy and one of my favorites.

[truthisfreedom]

175. neighbors, both beside me and across the street

affluent neighborhood

[TaleWgnDg]

176. A good portion of my clientèle is GLBT. Many members of my

family are gay. Friends too. Some of my professional peers are GLBT. It's not unusual now-a-days.



.

[FM Arouet666]

177. Your right, hatred is bred from ignorance

If I had stayed in my home town, and did not pursue higher eduction, I would have to say zero. Pathetic considering that my home town is in Southern California. However, I have had numerous gay friends, some very close, while attending college and graduate school in Berkeley and NYC. Familiarity breeds acceptance, not only for others, but for yourself.

[Liberty Belle]

178. Many!

Professional colleagues, designers I've interviewed, my daughter's skating coach, to name just a few.

[yurbud]

179. former roommate

didn't know he was gay at the time

[johnaries]

182. I've known many, and considered several very close friends. nt.

[lumberjack_jeff]

184. Six. One, a niece.

[neuvocat]

185. I know a few.

Some at my apartment complex and others at my work.

[nofurylike]

186. me.

[JohnLocke]

187. Two people.

[last_texas_dem]

188. I know a few

Two of my best friends (I consider about eight people as making the cutoff for "best" friends) are gay. Interestingly, I knew both of them for several years before they came out. One, we met when we were ten and she came out to me when we were twenty; the other one I met when he was fifteen and he came out at eighteen. I had suspicions about one and not the other. They have both come out of the closet very gradually; I know it has been very tough as they both come from conservative Catholic families.

I also have a couple other friends who are gay (well, one is bi), and have a few other acquaintances who are gay. Having a couple of gay friends has caused me to meet several more gays that I might not have known otherwise.