David Wade smacks down Boston Globe for anti-Kerry piece

[wicket]

Zing! I read the original piece, for a supposed satirical piece, it lacked any humor unless you are a freeper.

http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/letters/articles/2005/05/02/piece_on_kerry_not_accurate_or_funny/

DAVID MARTIN'S satirical waste of space (''John Kerry: The first 100 days," op ed, April 29) was about as accurate as it was amusing, which is to say not very. The Globe has covered in detail Kerry's return to the Senate. Martin obviously hasn't read a word of it.

Over the last 100 days, Kerry introduced his Kids First bill to provide health insurance to 11 million children living without it today. He introduced a Military Family Bill of Rights to increase benefits to our troops -- and guess what? -- he's already passed most of it in the Senate.

He has also introduced legislation to increase the size of the military to address the overextension of the Guard and Reserves. He's battled the EPA to overturn mercury regulations that fail to address a major health risk in the Merrimack Valley. He worked with Mayor Ed Lambert to lobby the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission against a liquid natural gas facility in Fall River.

He passed emergency legislation to keep beloved Fenway High teacher Obain Attouoman in the United States. He passed bipartisan legislation to get Massachusetts fishermen the same bankruptcy protection as family farmers.

If George W.Bush had done half the work Kerry has in these last 100 days, maybe our gas prices would be lower and we'd have fixed Social Security for the next generation.

DAVID WADE
Washington

The writer is communications director for Senator Kerry.

[LittleClarkie]

1. All I could get was a snippet

But even the first one wasn't funny if you have half a brain.

"Jan. 20

Watch TV as Bush sworn in again. Throw J. Crew socks and Godiva chocolate wrappers at set every time he says "freedom" or "democracy." Phone rings, but I don't answer. Call display shows it's Al Gore probably wanting to commiserate again. No way I'm joining that loser in Loserville."

Moron, he didn't have to watch it on the television. He was there, very graciously getting booed at by the likes of you.

It might be funnier if said author actually watched the news and based his "satire" on reality.

[wicket]

2. Full article

I was able to get the full article through http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial%5Fopinion/oped/articles/2005/04/29/john%5Fkerry%5Fthe%5Ffirst%5F100%5Fdays">this link, here ya go:

Jan. 20 Watch TV as Bush sworn in again. Throw J. Crew socks and Godiva chocolate wrappers at set every time he says ''freedom" or ''democracy." Phone rings, but I don't answer. Call display shows it's Al Gore probably wanting to commiserate again. No way I'm joining that loser in Loserville.

Jan. 26 Channel all energies into tracking down members of Swift Boat Veterans for Truth. Phone remaining loyal crew members to engage their services in search and destroy mission. Despite generous offer, none is ''reporting for duty." Regrettably, mission is terminated with extreme prejudice.

Jan. 31 Teresa issues ultimatum: Either I stop moping around the house in bathrobe all day or she'll cut off my weekly allowance. Her words hit me like a cold splash of water. Stop watching C-Span in hopes of finding ongoing election recounts. Briefly leave house to avoid Teresa's incessant swearing in Portuguese.

Feb. 2 Groundhog Day. If I see my own shadow, there'll be six more years of Republican rule. If I don't, there'll be eight. Back to bed. What's the point?

Feb. 9 Concerned about Bush's reform proposal, visit local Social Security office and inquire about filing early application for benefits. Informed that qualifying age is 67 and reminded that I am still employed by US Senate. Vow to attend at least one sitting in current session.

Feb. 15 Out of desperation, finally decide to answer Al Gore's call. Instantly regret decision. Al rambles on suggesting I grow beard, put on weight, and teach at obscure backwoods university. Finally cut him off by telling him I have Democratic filibuster to attend in Senate.

Feb. 16 Try again to phone Bill Clinton. Still won't take my calls. Even Jimmy Carter won't answer now.

Feb. 28 Teresa informs me of new policy of ''No late fees" at Blockbuster. Suggests I return cache of rental movies I've been accumulating to avoid extra expense. Discover policy has limits and am now the unwitting owner of DVDs for ''The Manchurian Candidate," ''Apocalypse Now," and ''Caddyshack II."

March 1 Hillary calls and asks where the hell I've been. Apparently we need every Democrat's vote to block passage of Republican agenda. Even Ted Kennedy showing up regularly. Promise Hillary I'll do better. Ask her why Bill never calls.

March 10 Bored silly. To pass time, make prank calls to Queen Elizabeth and ask if she's got Prince Charles in a can. When she replies curtly, ''Who is this?" I tell her she better let him out and quickly hang up. Consider calling back and asking for Harry Butz.

March 23 Phone Vatican and ask forgiveness for stance on abortion and gay marriage in last election. Try a couple of ''Bless me, Fathers" but get no response. Receptionist suggests I try again in a month.

April 1 Front page of my morning New York Times features article reporting Supreme Court reopening issue of potential voter fraud in Ohio in last election. Reporter's speculation about possible Kerry victory gets me reenergized. When I excitedly relay news to Teresa she announces ''April Fools" and informs me that she had mock front page printed off kerrysucks.com website. We both share a laugh, and I retire to my room for quiet cry.

April 15 File tax returns for Teresa and me. Reconsider opposition to Bush tax cuts when I see all the money we get back. Maybe Teresa's wrong and he's not the devil incarnate.

April 29 Consider issuing press release captioned TOLD YOU SO with back of page headed I'LL BE BACK. Teresa discovers draft version and passes through paper shredder. 2008 run for president now looks doubtful.

April 30 Al Gore stops calling.

Very un-funny and stupid. :eyes:

[Marnieworld]

3. What a bunch of sore winners!

Steal the election and then make fun of the victim. Even if you buy the official results it's still so petty and mean-spirited. Blatant propaganda. I can't believe that this was in the Globe.

[blm]

4. Globe has always had an anti-Kerry bent for over 30 years.

Donald Segretti always kept some operatives at the Globe to counter both Kerry and Kennedy. No doubt, Rove has kept up that tradition. One of Globe's "reporters" actually found a job with the Bush administration when Bush took office in 2001. Bush only hires proven loyalists.

[politicasista]

5. Why is that?

I haven't heard about the other candidates getting this much hate as Kerry has.

[cestpaspossible]

6. Bob Somerby has a theory

http://www.dailyhowler.com/dh011703.shtml

[blm]

7. Kerry helped to end a war at age 28. The fascists would do whatever they

could to prevent him from developing into a greater powerhouse.

That is probably why you rarely heard the media discuss Kerry's amazing accomplishments in fighting government corruption, let alone report on them as journalists.

Most of the journalists who covered IranContra and BCCi indepth were either fired, disappeared, suicided, or marginalized.

[wicket]

8. kick

:kick: