Salon rant on debate 2: "Getting all pissy: the audience comes out ahead"

[Bush_Eats_Beef]

http://www.salon.com/opinion/feature/2004/10/09/blow_by_blow/index.html

Man asks Bush about the draft. Between convulsions, Bush distracts draft-age demographic by revealing the existence of a second Internet. Kerry says that using stop-loss policies to keep people from getting out of military service amounts to a back-door draft. Bush jumps off stool, barking and grinding his teeth. Moderator tries to pet him, sustains lacerations. Bush snarls: Tell that to the Italian guy and the Brits. Hey, we've got 30 countries helpin' us out. Kerry says: You forgot Poland. Smoke coming out of Bush's ears spells out these words: "Poland can kiss my grand coalition."

Woman says to Kerry, So far so good, we haven't been horrendously attacked again lately. Any thoughts? Kerry claims adequate homeland security could come in handy. Bush says he doubled, tripled the funding. Except that he did neither. It's what you call PATRIOTIC license. Snaps: "I'm worried. I'm worried. I'm worried about our country." Figures that oughta do it. Sheesh, nosy broad.

10 p.m. Guy dares Kerry to look into the camera and tell Americans that in his first term he won't raise tax burdens on families making less than $200,000. Kerry looks into the camera and tells Americans that in his first term he won't raise tax burdens on families making less than $200,000. Highlights the $1,000 child-care credit and $4,000 college credit. Bush asks Gibson: Is my time up yet? Look on some Missourian faces says: "24 days."

Bush accuses Gibson of putting "a head fake on us." Woman asks Bush for three examples of mistakes he made and how he fixed them. Bush grinds her bones to make his bread, then says, 1) History will look back at me; 2) I am responsible; and 3) I didn't make any mistakes except for some appointments of people who quit and then went on "The Daily Show" with their damn books. Kerry helps Bush recall other mistakes. Bush does not seem grateful.

[MatrixEscape]

1. They are suggesting ...

that Bush's reference to "Internets" was anything more than another of his many verbal mistakes?

I think many are aware of, (and suspicious about) Internet2, but I never think of it as plural, nor is that a mainstream usage.

[Kierkegaard]

2. That is awesome!

I'm laughing my ass off here!!! :D

[Roland99]

3. Truly a memorable piece...funny as hell!

[localroger]

4. That is hilarious

Kerry, in closing, says that America's best days are ahead of us. Bush yells: "Are not."

Priceless.