My new roommate seems to be under a mistaken impression...

[Chan790]

that Axe body spray makes a great air freshener (used two full cans now sitting in the garbage) and now my apartment smells like a cheap bordello going on 4 hours.

Grounds for justifiable homicide?

[Bucky]

1. Perhaps only using one can didn't deliver on scads of hot chicks as promised in the commercials

But one can per armpit... yeah, that ought do 'er up right.

[trof]

2. I remember Hai Karate.

yuck
I think Broadway Joe Namath was pushing that one.
Remember him?

[Iggo]

3. Homicide? No.However, a sound thrashing seems to be in order. (n/t)

[MorningGlow]

4. Absolutely

No jury in the world would convict you--not if there are a fair number of women on it. (Hey, young men--Axe STINKS and chicks don't dig it, no matter what the ads try to tell you!)

[david13]

5. Absolutely. In fact I can get you a top notch lawyer, free. If there is

one thing I hate it's people who slather those chemicals all over themselves and think they smell anything unlike Dow Chemical.
There are many people who are allergic to that garbage.
Ok, no homicide. Let's just say, tie him up, securely, and leave him in the basement for the next 6 years.
dc

[rug]

6. That would be an Axe murder.

Lure him to Fall River first. You'll stand a better chance of beating it.

[Gidney N Cloyd]

7. 30 years ago I still remember my college roomie having his girlfriend over and instead of...

actually just WASHING his bedsheets (given he had plenty of time) he sprinkled cologne on the bed.

[Chan790]

8. This would be the same idea...

the apartment's a shithole of his making and this (along with swiffering the floor and putting all his dishes in the sink and then dirtying mine so I'd wash all the dishes) was his solution.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

9. A NEW roommate?

I think it may be time for a much NEWER one.

ICK.

You deserve much better than this.

[Chan790]

10. They're not my decision to make...

they're the shady Albanian gangster lawyer's and his mom's. I'd choose better people.

[mysuzuki2]

11. So, how do you know what a cheap bordello smells like?

If you had said your house smells like a byzantine pissoir, I might have some sympathy.

[Chan790]

13. I work in Adams Morgan, DC.

The world-famous bar across the street from work used to be one before it was a department store, then a Toys R' Us, after which it became a blues club themed as its' original occupant. It's been 100 & change years and walls are still imbued with a stink like wood essences and funerary flowers soaked in alcohol and goat-sweat.

(Before you ask how I know what goat sweat smells like, I summered on grandpa's dairy (goats and sheep, one cow) farm growing-up.)

The building I work in is also famous. It's the site of the largest mass-casualty movie theater disaster in US history. The roof collapsed due to excessive snowfall during a early evening screening of a silent family film called "Get-Rich-Quick Wallingford" in 1922 killing 98 people and injuring 200+, the majority children. The Knickerbocker Storm was, prior to 9/11, the largest mass-casualty event in DC history. There is a famous photograph of the injured, dying and dead lined up down the side of Columbia Rd. in foot-deep snow for as far as the camera is in focus.

[marzipanni]

12. I had a considerate, younger woman roommate a long time ago

I had a dog, and maybe she noticed a slight doggy odor that I was used to. (?)
Never having had allergies previously, I was annoyed by a constant tickle in my throat and went to the doc and had allergy tests. Nothing showed up but when I was sitting in his office getting the "all clear" report I asked, "Could it be from stick-up room deodorizers my roommate puts up?" "Yes, it could be from that!" was his reply.
When I told my roommate she said she had the same thing, a tickle that made her cough or try to clear her throat, so she threw away the offending discs.

Tell the guy that Axe odor makes you ill.

[Chan790]

14. He wouldn't care.

He's a jackass otherwise as well.

[csziggy]

15. Can you remove the Axe labels?

If so, put the labels on some other spray can. Maybe pink hair paint or Lysol. Use your imagination.