Idiotic old sayings:

[Redstone]

"It's always darkest just before dawn."

Uh, no, it's not, actually. It's darkest about midnight, when the sun is fully opposite your location on the Earth.


"You can't have your cake and eat it, too."

Of course you can. First you have it, in your hand or on a plate, then you eat it. Yes? (Actually, this saying was originally the eminently more sensible "You can't eat your cake and (still) have it, too." Nobody seems to know when it got turned around to the current dumb version.)

Redstone

[bluesbassman]

1. "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush".

No, I'm pretty sure a bird in your hand is worth precisely one bird. Or several stitches depending on the type of bird you latched on to.

[MiddleFingerMom]

11. Especially the jealous type:

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[old mark]

2. " Just because there is pepper in the soup does not mean that there is pepper in the cook."

I read this many years ago, and say it at times, and have no idea what it is supposed to mean...It sounds French for some reason...


mark

[Kaleva]

3. "I'll just give this a lick and a promise"

[Texasgal]

4. "Don't cry over spilled milk"

:eyes:

[trackfan]

5. I've always thought about how false the "darkest before the dawn"

thing was. The cocks usually crow first around 4:30 when there is an almost imperceptible increase in light; and it just gets lighter after that.

[Suich]

6. "Cat got your tongue?"

Glad to see you around, Redstone!



:hi:

[May Hamm]

7. What's good for the goose is good for the gander,

[raccoon]

8. "Everything happens for a reason."

"He who hesitates is lost," BUT "Look before you leap."


"Money isn't important." Seriously, I used to hear this in my neck of the world.

"High school years are the happiest years of your life." (Actually, you used to hear that a lot, but I haven't in the past few decades.)

[siligut]

9. Cheaters never prosper

Every cloud has a silver lining.

[LiberalEsto]

10. A stitch in time

saves nine.

Nine WHAT?

[Richardo]

12. Nine stiches.

Problems only get worse. Entropy. Etc. :)

[av8rdave]

13. Actually, that one makes sense

A timely repair to a small tear (one stitch) prevents the need for a greater number of stitches (9, in this case) later.

[Boojatta]

21. Nine lives.

If the fabric of the space-time continuum is torn and nobody bothers to sew a stitch to fix it, then one cat somewhere in the world will lose all nine lives as it gets pulled through to feline hell.

[KamaAina]

23. It was originally the German nein (nothing)

then it got corrupted to the number nine, which, as you mention, makes no sense whatsoever.

[trackfan]

27. It makes more sense with punctuation: A stitch, in time, saves nine.

(sc., stitches, like Richardo said).

[edbermac]

14. "Never kiss a toilet seat"

:hurts:

[bif]

15. "This could be a blessing in disguise"

Right after you get canned from a job. "Really? Then explain to me how losing a job, with a big mortgage and four mouths to feed is a blessing in disguise?"

[RedCloud]

16. "Our sun will grow old and die."

No freaking way. Andromeda is barreling down on us and will wipe us out before that happens.

[IcyPeas]

17. never look a gift horse in the mouth?

what the heck's a gift horse anyway?


A watched pot never boils. (just not true)

[GreenPartyVoter]

32. Don't check the age of a horse that someone has graciously given you. At least I think that's what t

it means. :shrug:

[gratuitous]

18. Keep away from Runaround Sue

Good heavens, why? She puts out!

[hunter]

19. Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Except when it doesn't...

[pscot]

20. It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy

in snide. Just keep a $20 bill in front of your drivers license.

[annabanana]

29. Why does this conjur up the OLD mad magazines?

I see an image when I hear it... 50's Mad style. .

[pscot]

30. That's the source

I think it means, roughly, once you've actually been arrested, attempts to negotiate are no longer advised.

[theNotoriousP.I.G.]

22. My mom's favorite

"you have the same clothes to get glad in!" Inherited from her mom and dad when nobody had more than one fucking outfit to their name thanks to the depression.

[LeftishBrit]

24. 'That'll teach you to do X!'

When you mean that will teach you NOT to do it.

[Odin2005]

25. 'Winners never cheat and cheaters never win"

:banghead:

[Redstone]

26. Oh, and of course, uttered by abusive parents:

"I'll give you somethiing to cry about!"

As if beating the crap out of a kid for crying is somehow justified by that threat.

Redstone

[LeftishBrit]

28. Or 'This hurts me as much as it hurts you.'

No, it doesn't.

[Archae]

33. It did to my Mom.

Her hand would ache for days after giving any of us a spanking.

So she started using a wooden spoon. :scared:

[Zavulon]

31. "Hard work never killed anyone."

Hard work kills people all the time.

[Brother Buzz]

34. "A coward dies a thousand deaths, a hero dies but one."

A thousand to one is pretty good odds.

[Behind the Aegis]

35. "A broken clock is right twice a day."

No, it isn't. It's broken! There is also a difference between AM and PM. And, gee, the only way to know when the broken clock was correct would be to have a working timepiece, so why use a broken one which is only "correct" twice a day?

"A blind pig occasionally finds a truffle."

Given that pigs actually search for truffles using smell, it doesn't matter if they can see or not, unless they have x-ray vision as most truffles are underground.

[dimbear]

38. This is going to be lost on future generations.

Nowadays broken clocks don't display. Or blink.

[ashling]

36. Something is "is too cute by half"

half of what? That is as dumb as low fat half & half.

[orleans]

37. "who forgot to put the toilet seat down?"

oh -- maybe that isn't so idiotic

how bout

"little pictures have big ears"

right. if you think of a child as a picture.

[HERVEPA]

39. The original quote is actually....

"you can't eat your cake and have it too" , which makes more sense.