This is not a joke. I would like your opinions and comments on this situation.

[Richard Steele]

Life is strange, as a rule.

Long story short, I am currently considering an offer
to "get busy" with a person who is #3 on my Forbidden Fruit list.

For those of you not familiar with the term,
the "Forbidden Fruit list" is a mental list of the people you
would really LIKE to have sex with, but probably can't
and really shouldn't.
(It's a GUY thing, I think)

The all-time number ONE on the Forbidden Fruit list:
Your girlfriend's hot mom.
Number two:
Your girlfriend's hot sister.
Number three:
Your girlfriend's hot "best friend since high school".

And that's where my life just got "interesting" last week...
my ex-girlfriend kicked me out of her life 2 years ago,
and her "best friend ever" just got into contact with me
and is making some pretty blatant advances.

I'm not the smartest guy when it comes to understanding people,
but when someone calls me on the phone and says
she wants to tear my clothes off with her teeth,
she's probably talking about having SEX, right?

My Ex and I split up over 2 years ago.
We don't have any obligations to each other any more.
So, there's no reason I can see to NOT go spend
a sweaty naked weekend with her best friend.

But, when something seems too good to be true, it probably is.
And this shit seems WAAAAY too good to be true.

So, I'm asking DU to comment.
You guys haven't ever steered me wrong yet.

[lillypaddle]

1. Go for it

As you said, you haven't been with the ex for 2 years - I see no reason why not. Good luck!

[Broken_Hero]

52. Ditto, nt

[hunter]

2. How awful was the breakup?

They're probably planning to duct tape your mouth shut, strip you naked, stuff you in the trunk of a stolen car, and drop you off in a Wal-Mart parking lot.

Or maybe handcuff you to a urinal in the nastiest gas station restroom they can find.

Women can be mean.

[woo me with science]

11. This is true.

I saw it on Judge Judy.

[Richard Steele]

12. Fairly awful. When I said she kicked me out, I meant it literally.

One of her best friends from college is a guy who is currently
considered to be one of the best Okinawan Karate teachers in the
Western Hemisphere, and she took private lessons from him
for many years...

She's a big lady. Imagine the Pillsbury Dough Boy if he was a chick
packing a pair of 48 triple-D tits.
Now, imagine that he could put his foot upside your ear
so goddamn fast that you'd never see it coming.

With me so far?

Now, imagine that he's on a first-name basis with the GOVERNOR
of the fucking State and he just called 911 to have the cops haul you away.
And when he calls 911, there are FIVE patrol cars in your front yard
within 180 seconds.

All in all, it might have been the second worst breakup
I've ever had.

[dixiegrrrrl]

14. Wait!!! If THAT is the 2nd, I want to know about FIRST worst break up.

[Richard Steele]

20. I said it was MAYBE my second worst breakup ever.

Maybe.

I am never going to tell you about my worst breakup ever,
so please don't waste your time asking.

If you wanna know about some pointlessly fascinating moments
from my personal life, you do what everyone else does:
Ask me about that time I robbed that bank back in '83.

[lillypaddle]

25. I take it back

steer clear.

[noamnety]

38. My advice:

don't talk about women in that way, as if they are defined by the size of their chest.

I don't have thoughts about whether you should or shouldn't hook up with that women, beyond thinking if I were her I would want better for myself than someone who talks about women like that.

Not quite what you asked for, but maybe there's some worth in stopping to think how that reflects on you.

[Richard Steele]

41. I don't talk about women that way. You are really stretching reality there. Welcome to "ignore"

[driver8]

3. I would go for it...

I have had a couple of women make "advances" towards me over the internet -- women from my past.

I am married and cannot act on it, but if I could I would have.

[rug]

4. If you're going for Forbidden Fruit, don't go lower than #2. It's the rules.

[zanana1]

5. I'd say no.

I might be overly cautious, but this has "DANGER"! written all over it.

[Generic Brad]

6. The key word here is "Ex"

If this were a current girlfriend all of them would be off limits. But since it's an ex-girlfriend there are no longer any lines to cross. You are free to proceed.

[Richard Steele]

15. That's what I'm thinking. I have bent over backward to let her have her space...

...since the breakup.

I have not been within 200 miles of her house, and i have
not attempted to even talk to anyone she knows on the internets.

Her friends have been starting to talk to ME lately,
because she's been kicking them out of her life
just like she kicked me out of our home.

Her friend and I always had some serious sexual tension happenning;
our little circle of friends joked about all the time.
but we never did anything about it because I was committed to her.

I'm not committed to her anymore, and she's done all she can
to turn her best friend into an EX friend,
so why shouldn't I spend a couple days having fun
with her?

[cloudbase]

7. There's a reason

it's on the forbidden list. They don't end well.

[rrneck]

8. Sounds like fun

but remember you're tap dancing in a minefield.

Maybe start with a waltz...

[tigereye]

17. I like this answer!

[rbnyc]

9. Have fun!

And remember, it's better to regret something you have done, than something you haven't done.

[Sweet Freedom]

10. To me, this has trouble written all over it.

She your ex's "best friend" and is trying to seduce you? And just out of the blue wants to rip your clothes off? What?

If that's how she treats her best friend, she sounds like trouble. And it smells desperate.

I've heard this story before, it ends with obsessive behavior from her.

My vote is hell no.

[Phentex]

48. If they both want sloppy seconds...

that's what they'll get.

Yeah, she's so HOT she's desperate for her friend's ex. Sounds like a prize!

I'm with you. This will not end well, lol.

[madmom]

13. I would say IF you do decide to go for it...be VERY careful. It could be a

ploy from the ex along with the best friend. It smells very bad to me, watch your back!

[snagglepuss]

29. I'd say go for it. The person who should feel moral obligation in this situation is your

ex's girlfriend and imo she has fulfilled that moral obligation by waititng two years to contact you. It is possible she was attracted to you since she met you but held off saying anything because she didn't want to hurt her friend. If that is the case I think she sounds like a good person.

[Chan790]

16. Yes. (No comment. Just yes.) n/t

[tigereye]

18. you need a male answers vs female answers here!

[LaurenG]

19. What's the problem?

The only drawback I see could come as a breakup of the friendship between your ex and her best friend.

[IDemo]

21. Could be trouble

You'd better give me her name, email and phone number and I'll see what I can find out for you.

[Richard Steele]

31. tee hee

[Iggo]

22. Get 'er, dude. But remember...

...Ex-GF will hear all about it. Can she stil make your life hell in anyway?

[petronius]

23. You have no obligation to the ex, so I'd say you're free to do as you will

As long as you're sure you and the friend are on the same page and wanting the same thing. I'd ask myself what the friend's motivations are for making the approach at this point, however - if she's attempting a mindfuck on the ex I'd probably stay clear (or at least weigh the cost/benefit of sex versus future drama), but if she's just clearing out her to-do list then great...

[MilesColtrane]

24. If she has you over to her place and fixes you both drinks just out of eyeshot...

you should say to her, "Hey, look over there!", then switch the drinks when she's not looking.

Just in case.

[PassingFair]

26. Are you that hard up for sex?

There are MILLIONS of women in the world,
why fuck your ex's best friend.

Unless you are in love with her
(which you DON'T mention) why in the
world would you stir up that kind of
shit in your life?

Find another watering hole.

[Rosie1223]

27. After reading reply #12,

I think you should avoid your ex and anyone that ever knew her.

[nolabear]

28. Not enough info. Are they still best friends? Makes a big difference.

For one thing, I'd be concerned about getting involved with someone who'd not be concerned about the possible ramifications of that. And why now? Is this a sudden attraction out of the blue or were you two avoiding sex because of the friendship? Is she likely to use you to get back at that ex girlfriend for any reason?

It's never simple, so just be sure the right head is leading you into this, I'd say.

[Richard Steele]

39. No, they are no longer friends. My EX has dumped all of her old friends.

I was just the first to go, as it turns out.

[cherokeeprogressive]

30. Too good to be true? Nah; even a blind squirrel finds an acorn on occasion.

Have fun.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

32. Off ya go, then.

There's a good lad.

[Richard Steele]

34. You are so naughty.

Remind me to spank you sometime.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

45. Appointments are available.

[Richard Steele]

60. Sure, but just -TRY- to find a decent-quality 24" wooden ruler these days.

Those cheap crap rulers they sell at WalMart? forget it.
They come right apart in your hand on the secomd or third swing,
and then there's nothing to do but untie your partner
and go watch Leno.

LENO!

[SalmonChantedEvening]

61. I have a friend at the local school district.

And boy, do I mean strict.

LENO? Might as well leave me tied up.

[Lucian]

33. Fuck your ex.

Fuck her best friend (see what I did there? )

GO FOR IT!!!

[blueknight]

36. knock the bottom out of it!

what the hell you waiting on? i would crush it like a grape!

[Richard Steele]

37. I see what you did there.

I lauged so hard, I kinda peed a little.

[flvegan]

35. I can't believe you're even contemplating NOT doing it.

[Richard Steele]

40. You do realize that it's probably a TRAP of some sort, right?

But, even knowing that, I'm still gonna go for it.
I'm a guy, and we're stupid that way.
Heck, I'd stick my penis into the shrubbery
if you convinced me that there was a bunny in there.


This chick makes a good living as a 'personal trainer';
the phrase "physically fit" does not BEGIN to describe her.

She's six feet tall, perfectly formed, and her ass is so
goddamned AWESOME that she should get a tattoo that says
"continued on next ass".

So, whats a guy supposed to do?

[MilesColtrane]

42. "So, whats a guy supposed to do? "

Stop bragging about it, and hit it?

[Richard Steele]

46. That's what I'm thinking, Miles:Hit it with all I've got, and try to act like I've been there before

If it turns out that this is a trap,
and y'all never hear from me again,
please inform DU that I died the way I lived:
Foolishly.

Just for the record: I regret NOTHING.

[nolabear]

62. Okay you're getting a little icky here.

(though the tattoo line is good stand-up)

[demmiblue]

64. A little more than a little.

Gross.

[Richard Steele]

65. I know. And thanks for appreciating the line. nm

[xchrom]

43. Life is short. Go have fun. Nt

[Richard Steele]

47. Speaking of "go have fun"....

This whole thing revolves around the possibility
that I might be in Durham on the weekend after Thanksgiving.

Are you still living there? PM me.

[xchrom]

58. I'm here! Let me know if you're around. Nt

[pacalo]

44. Go for it! Ex has been out of your life for 2 years & is now a stranger to you.

Be happy!

[struggle4progress]

49. Ask yourself: could this person be even crazier than I am? If the answer is "maybe" or "yes"

then take things real slow

There are other questions you can ask yourself, but that's always a good first one

[Richard Steele]

51. S4P, my dear friend, no one is crazier than I am.

You are one of the smartest people I've ever met,
so I just kinda assumed that you knew that already.

My bad.

[struggle4progress]

56. I try not to assess the sanity of others. I merely told you my own rule: it can be

rephrased depending on circumstances, such as "Am I crazy enough to go to bed with this person?" or "I wonder if this person would be sane enough to go to bed with me?" It has several other variants, such as "If I were crazy enough, I'd be able to go to bed with absolutely anybody" or "If more people were sane, I'd get laid more often"

It is a very flexible rule, subject to much interpretative quibbling

[Rabrrrrrr]

50. Two years after the breakup? She's been non-forbidden fruit for that long. Go for it.

Screw what your ex might think about it.

[Richard Steele]

55. Damn right! My ex has sure as hell been busy with a lot of women since we split...

Her friend and I spent 9 years -NOT- doing anything about
our intense physical attraction, because we're both
decent people.

I think maybe we deserve to have a bit of adult "special time" together;
to make up for all those years of tension with three days of RELEASE.

[unhappycamper]

53. Go for it, Dude.

You'll be wearing a shit-eating grin, but .

[Richard Steele]

57. I'm wearing a shit-eating grin already, thinking about what MIGHT gonna happen 3 weeks from now.

[Moondog]

54. Unless your ex

isn't, in your mind, your ex, I'm not sure I understand why you think you have a problem.

But you seem to think so, or you wouldn't be asking.

So, since you are asking, yes, you should think twice.

However, on the off chance that you are just insecure and need all sorts of validation to have sex, TWO YEARS AFTER THE FACT, well, then, OK. Consider yourself validated.

[supernova]

59. sounds like your ex is the one

w/ the problem,

Have fun!

[Richard Steele]

63. Your opinion carries a lot of weight in this matter, since you were on my "Forbidden Fruit" list ..

Look, there you are, right there on that old list:
Number 4: Smokin' hot cutie I met on the internets.

After that DU Meetup at the Pizza parlor in Raleigh,
I made the mistake of telling my ex that I found you attractive.
and that was quite a mistake to make, Itellyawhut!

[Love Bug]

66. How much loyalty can you expect from a woman who would do this

to her "best friend." Yes, you broke up by her choice over 2 years ago, but I can tell you from personal experience that fair or not, there is no statute of limitations on the Girlfriend Code. It also sounds like you are only interested in getting your "itch" scratched. Nothing wrong with that as long as no one gets hurt, but this situation has "hurt" written all over it. What if it ends up to be you again?

Besides, screwing the best friend would be a good way to stick it to the ex, now wouldn't it?

The fact that you are even asking shows you know this is a bad idea.

[REP]

67. I say she's off the list and on your plate but (if this even matters)

Sounds like she's trying to piss off her ex-friend and using you to do this. I realize dudes do not usually have a problem being used - especially this way - but if the ex is psycho loonie tunes, it's something to keep in mind. Other than that, you're being far too considerate of someone who apparently does not deserve it.

[BlueIris]

68. Assuming she's not joking, sounds like she's trying to get revenge

of some kind on her friend. Assuming you're okay with being used for an agenda, I can't see what's wrong with it.

[XemaSab]

69. Serious question:

You're talking about this like you think it's going to be 3 days of sweaty fun.

Is there anything to indicate that she thinks it's going to be 3 DECADES of sweaty fun, or is she on the same page about this being a casual fuck?

If it's the former, don't do it.

[HEyHEY]

70. WHAT?! You should be on her list of forbidden fruit, she should be number one on your "to fuck" list

Ex-girlfriend's best friend (when she dumped you) means you win!

[MissHoneychurch]

71. After reading through the replies

and found out the "best friend since high school" isn't anymore .... I'd say go for it and have fun. Who knows what will become of it.

Been in a similar situation. Between bf of best friend during college and me was a lot of sexual tension. Slept even in the same bed with him and nothing happened (that was AFTER they broke up). A couple years later we did connect in bed ... but it wasn't really that awesome.

And Richard, of course I am jealous of that women

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

72. Like everyone sez: This will end badly ...

So when has that ever stopped anyone?

Listen to the small brain.

Go for it.