If Pets Were Unionized, What Would They Demand?

[SoDesuKa]

If pets had a union, my cats would demand more one-on-one quality time with me. There definitely would be food fights; there already are. I don't give them people food, because I don't think it's good for them. Besides, it freaks out house guests to have cats patrolling the dining room for table scraps.

If my cats had a shop steward to complain to, they'd file a grievance to be allowed out on the window sill. We live in an upstairs apartment, and I don't care how sure-footed they are, it just bothers me that they might fall. They can claw at the screen, but I won't open it.

At union meetings, I suspect they'd complain about each other. But I don't see them threatening to strike because they need more sleep. These animals have it pretty soft - one hour on, twelve hours off. And that's a work day.

[sakabatou]

1. Unlimited cheezburgerz.

[Angleae]

2. Dogs: Food, Ball, Bellyrub, etc. Cats: World Domination.

[woo me with science]

3. To go OUTSIDE!!!!!!!

Walks. Runs. Get that thing off my neck.

Sick of being in the house.

[whistler162]

4. scratches head...... executives unionizing????????

never happen!!

[madinmaryland]

5. Unlimited Cat-nip!

[Kali]

6. 24 hour uniformed door tenders

meowt now, mein now, out, in, out, in, etc. etc. etc.

[Richardo]

7. I'm pretty sure ours are already organized.

I keep finding flyers from the AFL-CIO* around the food dishes, litter boxes and doggie toys.


*American Feline League - Canine International Organization

[SoxFan]

8. Everything

No change from the status quo, actually.

[Jokerman]

9. The cats in our house are management. WE need the union. n/t

[Demoiselle]

10. My thoughts exactly, Jokerman.

And boy do I get yelled at when dinner is late.

[applegrove]

11. Dogs would want more job security. Cats would want 24 hour access to food.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

12. Cats are management.

[Generic Brad]

13. My cat would want me to be home bound

She looks so disappointed whenever any of us have to leave the house.

[Robeson]

14. I'm my cat's servant. They already own me.