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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 11:16 AM
Original message
Favorite Malapropisms
One of my ex-girlfriends is an awfully bright woman, but she has this funny habit of butchering any catchphrase she attempts to repeat -- often with hilarious results. Here are a few of my favorites:

"Hindsight is 50/50"

"That's the sheep calling the kettle black"

and

"Half of one, six dozen of another"


I use that last one all the time, whenever two choices seem initially equivalent but end up with wildly divergent outcomes.


Anyone care to add to the list?

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mysuzuki2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 12:29 PM
Response to Original message
1. I can't phantom the point of this thread
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arbusto_baboso Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 12:30 PM
Response to Original message
2. My grandmother once referred to turkey noodle soup as......
Turtle nooky soup.

We still rib her for that one.
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 12:31 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. Technically, that's a spoonerism
But it's still cute ;)
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arbusto_baboso Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 12:33 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. Aren't spoonerisms a subset of malapropisms?
I thought spoonerisms were just a specific KIND of malaprop.

In any case...

Do you remember an old Dabney Colman series called Slap Maxwell? The character of the editor had wonderful malapropisms. I'm sure you can find clips of that old show on youtube or hulu.
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 04:04 PM
Response to Reply #4
18. Nope. Spoonerism is for letters, Malapropism applies to words.
But thanks for the pointer to Slap Maxwell. I'll check it out.
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Curtland1015 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:21 PM
Response to Reply #18
30. But spoonerisms is for eating souperisms. NT
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Coventina Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 12:56 PM
Response to Original message
5. A friend of mine and I had a heated argument once over "participle board"
I kept insisting it was really "particle board", but he thought otherwise.

That one still makes me smile.
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Tommy_Carcetti Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 12:58 PM
Response to Original message
6. Peance Freance.
Courtesy of 43.
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kath Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 06:04 PM
Response to Reply #6
21. Oh, jeebus, I had forgotten about "peance freance"! What the heck was he *trying* to say? -
I've forgotten.
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JitterbugPerfume Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 01:26 PM
Response to Original message
7. cadillac converter
that one drives me nuts
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MineralMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 07:29 PM
Response to Reply #7
23. I always call it a
"Cadillac convertible." Call me crazy.
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Brother Buzz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 01:30 PM
Response to Original message
8. Let's get down to brass facts
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reflection Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
9. I once had a boss that said, in the space of one day:
Edited on Thu Jul-09-09 02:12 PM by reflection
"you're pulling the wool over my legs", and

"that son-of-a-b**** thinks he's the cake of the walk"

The last one still makes me laugh. :D
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Common Sense Party Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 02:15 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. I never understood what "cock of the walk" was supposed to mean.
Cake of the walk means about the same to me.
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Bertha Venation Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 03:42 PM
Response to Reply #10
15. refers to chickens - I think that
the "cock o' the walk" is like the top dog, alpha male, that kind of thing, among all the other roosters
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reflection Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-10-09 06:32 AM
Response to Reply #15
42. Yep. That's exactly what it refers to. n/t
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gratuitous Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 02:52 PM
Response to Original message
11. Downstate politician
He promised to turn around the county 360!
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NJmaverick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 02:53 PM
Response to Original message
12. "fool me once shame on you....errr... can't get fooled again"
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Mr. Ected Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 02:57 PM
Response to Original message
13. "Go the extra nine yards"
I never got the meaning of 'going the whole nine yards' in the first place, though.
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 04:02 PM
Response to Reply #13
16. "nine yards" refers to the traditional length of a bolt of fabric
If you bought the entire bolt, you got "the whole nine yards".
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Mr. Ected Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 04:05 PM
Response to Reply #16
19. You are erudite and helpful, rgraz
I now realize that a bunch of fabric is called a "bolt".

Never knew that...or the other thing either.

:hi:



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NJmaverick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 07:38 PM
Response to Reply #16
24. I was under the understanding that this referred to WW 2 fighters
most were equipped with M2 .50 caliber machine guns. These were belt fed with 3 foot belts that could be attached up to 27 feet. So if a fighter pilot had expended all his ammo he had given it the "whole nine yards".
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pokerfan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 07:55 PM
Response to Reply #24
25. Leave it to the Straight Dope guy
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:09 PM
Response to Reply #25
27. Wow, after seeing all those possible explanations
I can't believe the fabric story is the only one I've ever heard. None of them seems more plausible than the rest.
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abq e streeter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 03:05 PM
Response to Original message
14. Maybe not technically one, but "I resent the insinuendos" from the late mayor Daley
was a classic.
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 04:03 PM
Response to Reply #14
17. I had forgotten about that one.
"insinuendos" :rofl:
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bif Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 05:32 PM
Response to Original message
20. She was raped over the coals
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hippywife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 06:21 PM
Response to Original message
22. An old co-worker of mine
always had "too much on her gambit." Not gamut, mind you, so she not only mixed her metaphor, she didn't even do THAT correctly. LOL

The other is people who say ideal instead of idea or calvary instead of cavalry. I've even heard "journalists" (a.k.a. slick talking heads) do that last one.
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suninvited Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 07:59 PM
Response to Reply #22
26. casting asparagus
Edited on Thu Jul-09-09 08:22 PM by suninvited
I learned that one here

on edit: ooops, meant to reply to the OP.
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Zavulon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:11 PM
Response to Original message
28. I once had a boss who couldn't get these things right, either. You won't believe this:
Once, when writing a performance review of one of my female co-workers, he wrote, and I quote, "Tracy turns tricks of all trades."

I shit you not.
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hippywife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:25 PM
Response to Reply #28
31. ...
:spray:

I hope that didn't go on her permanent record. :rofl:
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Zavulon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:27 PM
Response to Reply #31
32. It was noticed and thrown back to him.
To Tracy's credit, she knew of his inability to handle simple idioms and laughed at it. He obviously meant well, but...WOW. Most of the females in my office encouraged her to play the victim card and sue.
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pokerfan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:19 PM
Response to Original message
29. statue of limitations
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:40 PM
Response to Original message
33. I am hard of hearing and had childhood friends who often yelled, "Are you death?!" at me. LOL
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rurallib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:47 PM
Response to Original message
34. Is Yogi Berra a subset here? He had some awesome quotes
When asked why he didn't like playing left field he said "It gets late early out there."
On a popular restaurant he noted "it's so busy nobody goes there any more"

holy smokes, that's all I can remember.
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:58 PM
Response to Reply #34
36. Here y'go
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dixiegrrrrl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 08:55 PM
Response to Original message
35. 5 y/o neighbor's child watching birds with me
excitedly told his daddy later that afternoon that one of the birds we saw was
" a red pecker woodenhead".

Daddy is a minister.
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jobycom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 09:13 PM
Response to Original message
37. Accounting humor: One of my bosses refers to the "physical year"
instead of "fiscal" obviously. Which basically means the opposite of what he's trying to say.
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Still Blue in PDX Donating Member (633 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 09:33 PM
Response to Reply #37
39. I heard a guy on Randi Rhodes' show say that today.
Funnily enough, he was talking about the sad state of schools in SC.
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Glorfindel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 09:25 PM
Response to Original message
38. Saying "I could care less" when you mean "I couldn't care less"
and, as my little cousin used to say, "mighty pines from little acorns grow."
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-09-09 09:44 PM
Response to Reply #38
40. If you account for sarcasm, that's grammatically correct
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noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-10-09 04:19 AM
Response to Original message
41. My daughter's teacher
yelled at the students one day for conjugating in the hallway.
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trof Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-10-09 06:41 AM
Response to Original message
43. 'He's got something up his arm.'
My beloved mother-in-law.
And from my grandson who was 4 at the time: "YOU WANT A PIECE OF MEAT!?"
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